My "back on the wagon" diary

A bit of back story. I've been overweight for as long as I can remember, certainly since early childhood. I'm an emotional eater, particularly when stressed. I can easily be very healthy all day and then binge on a whole pack of biscuits or big block of chocolate in an evening (sometimes both ) blowing a massive amount of calories.

When I met my now husband just over 10 years ago, I was a size 26. I never weighed myself back then, but I know I was well over 300lbs - probably around 320. I slimmed down to a size 14 for our wedding, around 220lbs. Which still sounds a lot compared to others of a similar size, but I have a very solid build (and I gain/lose weight evenly all over, rather than being a particular shape) so I'm always a bit heavier than I look.

Over the years, the weight slowly crept back on and I was back up to 270lbs and a size 18-20 before I realised it. So a couple of years ago I slimmed down again, this time to 210lbs making me a small size 14, sometimes even a 12 in some shops. But after a particularly stressful and lazy year, I find myself back up to 239lbs. My size 14s do still fit, but are getting too tight to be comfortable. I don't want to go out and buy 16s, so am doing something about it sooner rather than later.

Both of the previous times I didn't follow any particular plan, just stuck to what I considered to be healthy food (essentially a low carb diet) and a lot of exercise. But this time I've decided to follow Slimming World. It's very similar to how I've eaten previously, but thought it would help to give some structure without feeling like I was "on a diet" as such. Am doing the plan online, since the groups near me don't meet at convenient times.

So I thought a diary might help keep me on track, and making it a public one makes me more accountable. So here I am. :wave_cry:

Here is my EE meal plan for today...

Breakfast:
Danio passionfruit yoghurt (1.5)
Banana and a big handful raspberries (SF)
30g Special K granola (HEB)

Lunch:
Tees Valley chilli con carne (1.5)
Mixed salad, no dressing (SF)

I would normally have homemade free chilli but didn't have time to prep that, so went for a low syn packet.

Dinner:
Lean steak (free)
Salt and pepper wedges (3)
Mixed veggies (SF)
Gravy made with 1tsp Bisto (1)

Snacks:
Punnet strawberries (SF)
200ml Koko chocolate (HEA)

Pudding:
Mullerlight greek style toffee (0.5)

So I'm at 7.5 syns for the day, leaving a bit of wiggle room for an extra treat if needed.

Hi, will follow your diary I'm new to slimming world, joining next Monday! I'm an emotional eater too. Like you I can be good all day and come the evening I feel sad or stressed out and eat an entire family sized chocolate bar or pack of biscuits etc!

Hi! Thanks for stopping in.

Well, low syn dinner went out the window as DH wanted pizza. Only had half of a thin crust but still 20 syns later, plus 5 for a Muller choc pud instead of the toffee yoghurt...

I think it will be OK if I count syns over the rest of the week and factor them in. So sticking to 10 syns per day should more than make up for it. Fingers crossed!

I'm back! This week went off the charts stress wise. I tried to limit the damage as much as possible. Just wish I craved my favourite healthy foods when stressed instead of all the junk that I can quite easily ignore on a good day. Ho hum, today is a new day! EE menu...

Breakfast:
Big bowl of sliced strawberries and banana topped with a Danio passionfuit yoghurt and 30g Special K granola (free/sf, HEB + 1)

Lunch:
Using up leftovers so some cold chicken, big portion of roasted spiced butternut squash and homemade tzatziki (free/sf)

Dinner:
Tesco barbecue pork plus homemade spiced wedges and veggies (free/sf)
WW dessert style yoghurt (free)

Snacks:
Apple plus 2 Babybel (SF + HEA) - not thrilled by the cheese, but they were on offer so thought I'd try
Solero (5) - this was lush sitting out in the garden in the sun, felt a lot naughtier than 5 syns!

So only sitting on 6 syns for the day. Plenty of wiggle room if needed later on, but feeling quite content at the moment.

Bought a bunch of treat size "naughty" snacks (ranging 3-5 syns each) to see how it goes this week. I'm usually pretty good at not opening multiple packets but will eat the entire packet once it's open, so hoping the portion controlled sizes will work. I think there's only about 70 syns total, so not the end of the world if I did end up eating all of them.

Also think I'm going to try red/original days through the week. I've been missing having my Special K cereal bar as a mid-morning snack as it's so convenient for work, but don't want to use up 6 syns on it and always use my HEB for breakfast. So I think having 2 HEBs will be a benefit more than being allowed unlimited carbs. Don't really like pasta or rice anyway, so it's only potatoes and pulses that I'll need to avoid/syn. Will stay on EE at weekends though, so have them as guilt free options then.

Commenting to subscribe. I have just restarted last Wednesday after putting back on all the weight I lost last year - I am aiming to get to target by my wedding in September 2015 as I am fed up of being fat and fifty and want to be slim and sixty (will be 60 in March 2015)

Today's meals. First red day!

Breakfast:
OSS multigrain porridge with sliced banana and raspberries (SF + HEB)
Starbucks tall soya cappuccino (3.5 total and this may be cheating but it's just coffee and milk, so I figure half a HEA plus 0.5)

Lunch:
Leftover barbecue pork (free, and SO good!)
Big side salad, no dressing (all SF)

Dinner:
Spinach, tomato and cheese omelette (using 1 Babybel, so other half HEA)
Big handful of raw baby spinach on side - one of my fave foods, actually

Snacks:
Special K dark chocolate chewy bar (HEB)
M&S snack pack sushi (new packaging, but going to assume still 1.5 as the actual product looked the same)
Mini ploughmans - 1 ryvita crackerbread with 1 tbsp beetroot pickle and 35g lactofree cheese, apple slices (HEA + 2 - again, so good!)
Danio passionfruit yoghurt (1)

So I think red days are definitely going to work for me, only up to 5 syns and feel much more satisfied than on EE.

ETA: Realised I was doing the sushi syns from memory, and of course that was EE. Red syns are 5, which bumps the total to 9. Still well under!

Sorry I haven't caught up here, I haven't been feeling very well so didn't feel like keeping a food diary. Trying to stay on plan but did have toast for dinner last night (had already used HEB) as I couldn't face anything else.

I am still struggling every day with the urge to binge, even though there's nothing particularly wrong at the moment. Think it's become a habit more than anything else. Everything in the house is low syn though, so I haven't strayed off plan too much but I'm definitely eating more junk than I'm comfortable with. So I'm thinking about having a very clean week next week, just to see if I can crush the cravings. I've put my standard clean eating menu into the online diary and it meets HEA/HEB and works out at about 10 syns per day (mainly from nuts) so I think it will still fit into SW nicely.

Have also started reading "Beyond Temptation" which is an update / follow up to "Beyond Chocolate" which I saw recommended in a thread here for eating issues.

Hello poor neglected diary! The clean eating week went well, although only 5 of those days were strictly on it due to a work event but chose sensibly from the menu. Have now lost just over 5lbs. :clap:

Had a bit of a slip yesterday due to some junk in the house leftover from the weekend. Treat sized stuff (about 15 syns I think) so hopefully not too much damage done. Wasn't even hungry, eating it because it was there. Quite proud of myself today though as I was shopping in Sainsbury's and my favourite cookies were on special offer. They went straight into the basket without thinking and made it halfway around the store with me. But I put them back! Picked up the new banoffee pie Mullers to try instead. :happy036:

EE menu today...

Breakfast:
OSS Multigrain porridge (HEB)
Bananas and blueberries
Tall vanilla latte (going to claim this is HEA + 2 for syrup)

Lunch:
M&S mexican chicken strips (1)
Large mixed salad, no dressing

Snack:
Strawberries

Dinner:
Sainsbury's lamb shank in gravy (didn't know when I bought it, but FREE! Cooking now, it smells amazing)
SW sweet potato wedges
Mixed green veggies

Pudding:
Banoffee pie Muller (I think these are free or 1?)

So I'm only at 3 or 4 syns for the day. Not really feeling the urge to use more, but do have leeway if munchies strike.

I noticed shopping today that SW is really taking hold. Even things I was buying for my OH were in SW friendly portions. :giggle:

I was debating whether to call this an EE or red day, but the syns ended up much the same either way. But going to record it as EE...

Breakfast:
Danio passionfruit yoghurt with sliced banana, raspberries and Special K granola (HEB + 1 syn)

Lunch:
Lean ham, cucumber and R/F soft cheese on 4 Ryvita crackerbreads (HEA + 4 syns)
Apple slices

Dinner:
SW friendly bolognese on top of a small jacket potato instead of pasta, which I don't like (2 syns for cheese on top)
Large spinach salad

Pudding:
SW style "tiramisu ice cream" - cappuccino mullerlight mixed with FF quark (tip picked up in another thread) and frozen
Treat size Mars bar if I feel like it (4 syns)

Haven't snacked today as my lunch today was massive and very filling. Definitely converted to crackerbread when I feel like a sandwich style lunch, as it was so much more substantial than the equivalent amount of bread. Only just starting to get hungry now!

Little bit concerned with the amount of dairy in today's menu, as I try to limit it for health reasons. Might switch to non-yoghurt based puddings at the weekend, as I can't give up the granola breakfast - it's my weekend treat!

Another red day...

Breakfast:
OSS multigrain porridge with raspberries and sliced banana (HEB1)

Lunch:
M&S Chicken and Chorizo skewers (6.5 - ouch!)
Large mixed salad

Snacks:
Strawberries
Carrot sticks and sugarsnap peas
Special K dark choc bar (HEB2)

Dinner:
Sainsbury's lamb shank in red onion gravy (free)
Sainsbury's mediterranean vegetables (3)

Drinks: (other than water, which I never list)
Black coffee
250ml Tesco chocolate coconut milk (HEA)

Chorizo caught me off guard, wasn't thinking when I picked it up other than it looked yummy. Which it was! I knew the veg would have syns because of the oil, not too bad considering it's a massive portion. Next time I'll try to buy the individual veg and make them SW style, but didn't have time for that today.

So I'm at 9.5 syns without having anything naughty. But I may have one of my two syn tiramisus later if I feel like it. Posted the recipe in the recipe subforum. Super simple.

I thought this would be an EE day as was planning sausage and mash for dinner, but had a last minute change of plans so it's red...

Breakfast:
My usual OSS Multigrain with banana and raspberries (HEB1)
Tall sugar free vanilla latte (HEA1)

Lunch:
M&S mexican chicken (1)
Peppery salad mix, no dressing

Dinner:
Salmon, R/F soft cheese and cucumber "sandwiches" on Ryvita crackerbread (HEA2 + 4)

Snacks:
Apple
Hifi bar (HEB2)
"Tiramisu" (2)

Total syns: 7

I'm quite pleased with myself as I had a fight with the OH last night (fixed now) and very little sleep, so this morning I really wanted to sod the healthy breakfast and head to McDonalds. But I didn't! Dinner was a little short on SF though, had to eat and run. Lunch salad was huge though so I think it is OK over the day. May also try an SE day this week (not tomorrow, as will have the sausages then) to make sure to balance it out.

EE! Been looking forward to this dinner for days, so forgo my extra HEB to stay on plan...

Breakfast:
OSS multigrain porridge with mixed berries (HEB)
Black coffee

Lunch:
M&S salmon, potato and watercress salad (3)

Dinner:
BGTY sausages with potato, carrot and swede mash and gravy (4 syns total)
Side of steamed broccoli

Snacks:
Apple, banana
2x Babybel (HEA)
Treat size Milky Way (3.5)

Pudding:
Tiramisu (2)

So 12.5 syns today. When my whole indulgent dinner was only a half a syn more than a tiny Milky Way, it really puts junk into perspective!