morbidly obese to cheerfully overweight!

right, I am going to keep a diary on here, to try and keep myself on track...

In August 2010, I weighed about 17 stone, was wearing size 18 jeans, at a pinch, and 22-24 tops. (BMI of about 37, morbidly obese)

Then, I split up with my partner. We had put weight on together over the 12 years we lived together, he weighed about 19 1/2 stone I think.

At first, pure stress and upset made me lose a stone, then I decided to carry on... I think have found it easier as a singleton, as I love cooking for people, and enjoy eating with people - but on my own, I don't like it so much...

In fact, I struggle to motivate myself to cook at all now, so I am trying to ensure I eat reasonably healthily despite this. I do tend to go to other people's houses and eat with them, or to invite a friend round for a meal.

By Christmas 2010, I was down to 14st 2lbs, and seemed to stick at this till the end of january.

Recently, I have lost another 8lbs and am now down to 13st 8lbs. For the first time since I was in my early twenties, my BMI is below 30, so I am now officially only 'Overweight'!

I havent followed any diet plan, just cut down on portions, reduced carbs and high fat foods - eg. butter, cheese etc. I still have these, but in moderation.

I also have to admit that I do occasionally skip meals - I do not know why this is seen as being problematic, as many cultures only eat once a day, and as far as I can tell the idea of eating three times a day is only a societal and cultural norm, not a biological need.

I do eat when I am hungry though, and I figure that as I am very rarely hungry in the mornings, that it makes sense to eat my first meal of the day when I feel ready for it, rather than eat cereal or toast out of habit.

I think I am going to have to resort to buying some ready meals - or something - I don't know what to do.

I've always cooked from scratch, but I'm just not motivated to prepare food now unless I have a guest.

I went into the kitchen last night and decided to make myself some scrambled eggs on toast, and when I opened the pan cupboard, I had a strange feeling of unfamiliarity, almost like I didn't recognise things, and realised how rarely I am cooking now...

Unlike many people (it seems) I love eating with others, but hate eating alone... cooking and eating, for me, is a social thing. It's about caring for people, sharing with them, that's what I enjoy.

I love looking after people, cooking nice things for them... cooking for myself just seems like a sad, futile and lonely exercise that only serves as a reminder that it's just me here...

Ready meals arent any better - it seems so sad to me somehow.

In the weeks after my ex left, I could hardly eat at all, one day I called in to Sainsburys and bought a pasta carbonara thing to warm up... I microwaved it, and tried to eat it, but the single, sad plastic tray of mush just confirmed the horrible realisation of my loneliness, and that, together with the fact that the food was horrible anyway made me cry, and I couldn't eat it.

I tend to buy snacks, but look for reasonably healthy ones - fruit, ham, low fat cheese spread, cottage cheese, yoghurt, oatcakes.. and try to eat with others as much as I can.

I am finding it hard to shop for the right amounts, and have ended up throwing a lot of food away, I suppose it will get easier with time.

Had coffee and a banana for breakfast, sardines on toast for lunch (John west boneless sardines plus 2 slices ww malted granary = 250 cals!)

I need to think of more light and healthy lunch ideas I think. Will definitely go and buy some more boneless sardines, not as cheap as normal ones, but the bones often put me off.. so I figure its worth buying the boneless ones, as I do like oily fish, and it's good for you!

Good luck and well done on your previous weight loss

It will probably take a little time to adjust to a different way of eating and a different lifestyle. Don't look on it as you being alone, think of yourself as being independent and in control It will take a little time but it will be so worth it.

Don't waste money on microwave meals. especially if you don't enjoy them. How about making a casserole which will cover 2 days for dinner or lunch, or oven cook some skinless chicken and serve with lots of veg, baked potato with various healthy fillings, homemade soup, tuna and sweetcorn on toast, homemade fruit salad, crackers and low fat cheese spread, scrambled eggs on toast, poached egg on toast, boiled egg on toast, low fat sausages grilled and served with veg and a couple of small boiled potatoes, grilled healthy choice bacon, steamed fish with veg, oven cooked salmon etc etc..all these snacks and meals can be made easily for one person or a larger amount cooked to cover 2 days.

i make these snacks and meals, and many others, see my diary for daily menu, for myself..and the family most of the time has something different!!! but I quite enjoy making my own meal first and enjoying it!

Good luck!

Hi Rose, I know, and I agree that making my own meals is the best way to go... however, I just don't have the heart to cook for myself somehow.. I have cooked lots of low fat, healthy meals in the past, when there were two of us, cooking for myself somehow confirms that I am alone, and I just don't enjoy it.. in fact, more than that, it actually makes me feel sad...

I love cooking for other people, but cooking for myself is somehow not only not a pleasure, but somehow quite depressing... I have set out with good intentions, and bought stuff to cook, but end up avoiding it, till it has gone out of date and ends up in the bin.. which I hate too.. an egg on toast, or crackers and low fat cheese spread and fruit is about as far as my cooking extends at the moment, unless I have company!

I am a very independant person, and I am glad to be out of the relationship, but somehow something about food and company seems to be inextricably linked in my head.

Hello again

Pleased to hear you are independant and that you enjoy cooking. I fully understand that cooking for yourself at the moment is making you feel sad. Perhaps you could have company around for a meal on a regular evening every week, to allow you the pleasure of cooking again, and give you something to look forward to. Just eat and prepare what you are happy with and as you say when you are hungry. Maybe even changing the time you used to have a meal with your partner to an earlier or later time so it doesn't remind you too much.

Stay strong and keep posting, you'll get lots of advice and company on here, look after yourself, I look forward to reading your progress and I hope one day when you are ready you will be able to face and enjoy cooking for yourself now and then

Any type of upset is draining and many people can't face day to day routines, just do what you feel is right for you at this time, don't be hard on yourself if you can't face cooking, many people don't like to cook at all!

it must be difficult dealing with a relationship breakdown and this dieting malarkey at the same time, take care and remember how important you are and take strength from it

thanks Rose, yeah, its been a dificult time... however, I am feeling a bit more inspired today, haven't lost anything this week, and I know I need to eat some healthy low cal food instead of just snacks, so I am making a pan of veggie soup from the veg in the bottom of the fridge that needed using - its gone a funny colour, cos I chucked some red cabbage in, and I don't think it will be one of my finest culinary endevours, but it will be healthy and it should be edible!

right yesterday I had veggie soup, then had a friend round for dinner and did salmon, new pots and veggies.. probably not too bad although I did eat a fair few spuds!

today so far, Jordans baked oat bar (140 cals), glass of milk (100 cals), glass of orange juice (85 cals) .. so about 335 so far. Soup for lunch - not many calories I'm guessing... then who knows what for tea!

I might start writing down a log of my meals here.. whilst I know this will be deathly boring for anyone reading, (apologies folks) it may help me keep on track!

Hello
hope you are feeling a bit better today. Last night meals sounds lovely, how did the soup turn out the day before?
You should log your meals on here, I do mine every day in my diary on here, so I can look back and 'know' what worked that week for a weight loss and also to try to give anyone reading some ideas.
Have a good day, when are you thinking of weighing in?

thanks Rose, the soup was ok, not my finest, but edible! And yes, dinner was good, thanks - I need people to come round so I can cook for them! I have weighed myself today, no losses recently, but no gains either, and it does seem to plateau then drop for me, for some reason!

I will have a look at your diary, and see if I can steal any ideas! - I do think it is a good idea to log meals on here.. it will make me more 'mindful' of what I'm eating I think!

Well done on your big loss since February - that's fab! How is it going so far? (actually, I will go and read your diary and have a nosy!

With the warm days we have been having recently, I am feeling more motivated, the hot weather always makes me feel rotten, and I don't think I would feel it so much if I wasnt carrying as much weight - I am three and a half stone lighter than I was eight months ago, but I don't want to get stuck now, then find it gradually creeping back on!

I too dread summer, and even the hot spell recently, which has now gone up here made me feel uncomfortable, I am determined this is the last year, I'll be all hot and bothered and embarrased to wear summery clothes!!!..next year, I'll be down on the beach in shorts and t shirt

Hi well done on your weight loss so far that is an amazing success!! Why dont you make two or 3 big meals over the weekend (like lasagne, casserole or curry) and freeze them into individual portions... that way the days you dont feel like cooking you can take out whatever u fancy.. best of luck

yes, I should - I used to do this when there were two of us, but its been hard motivating myself. Maybe I should clear the junk out of the freezer and have a go though!

well, this week has been a bit hit and miss - went out for a meal with friends midweek, and was a pig, but enjoyed it

Other days I havent fancied much, but I keep trying to include some fruit, veg and protein!

today, I've had orange juice, some cereals, apple and satsumas, and a couple of bangers and hp sauce!

I have made a big bowl of salad, so I will probably have salad and tuna or cottage cheese for tea.

Weighed myself this morning, and another 1lb has gone this week, somehow... only another 1lb to go, then I've lost 50lbs!

Also, popped out for some bits and bobs earlier, and bought two summer tops from the supermarket... size 16!! I'm pretty sure its a generous size 16, but still!

had a few days off! Had a family birthday, and a few other bits and bobs, so not been too careful, and had fish and chips out, but stayed the same weight, so I can't have been too bad!

Had a healthier day yesterday, and just been swimming, so onwards and upwards!

yesterday had cereal, fruit, laughing cow on ryvita crispbakes, and some sweet and sour quorn stuff.. today, tomato juice, cottage cheese and muesli so far, beef stew for tea I think... still the same weight, but often it seems to plateau for weeks, then I drop a few lbs quite quickly... so we will wait and see! At least I haven't put any back on, that's the main thing!

Sonya73 said:

still the same weight, but often it seems to plateau for weeks, then I drop a few lbs quite quickly...

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uncannily, after saying this yesterday, I just hopped on the scales to find I am 4lbs lighter than I was two days ago, after about 3 weeks of staying the same.. how does that happen?? where does it suddenly go??:hmm:

Well done.

thankyou - I'm baffled by the plateau then sudden drop thing though!

Sonya73 said:

thankyou - I'm baffled by the plateau then sudden drop thing though!

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aha, its now totm... I think there is a definite connection here, although I thought in the past, the drop was generally after, not immediately before it started... but then again, maybe I just didnt notice the weight drop, if I didnt get weighed the day before my period started... hmm

Had a coffee and a cereal bar for breakfast, muesli for lunch, noodles, orange juice and green tea this evening...

need to eat some fruit and veg - out for lunch tomorrow