I should know better, but losing control big time :(

[Constant Cravings]

Hi everyone,

well... this is strange for me as I have used this message board before under a different username and since (which was a few years ago) was very successful at losing weight - however, over the past year or so I have been struggling a lot and people don't seem to understand just how I am struggling.

I now work as a Fitness Instructor so people expect you to always be the best at what you do etc but I can feel old habits sneaking back in and I am gaining weight so so quickly again it's scaring me.

I know exactly what I should be doing.
I know exactly how to do it.

But for some reason i simply cannot do it, its as though I am stuck in a very severe rut and can't seem to get the ignition to go for some reason? It sounds so so stupid and I get so frustrated, especially as I work day in day out helping others with their own fitness. I have all the knowledge - I don't have an excuse - I find myself on the verg ( if not already doing it) .. of binge eating again. I will wake up and think great today will be the day I am strong and start afresh, but then before I know it I will have eaten a load of crap food. And so the cycle continues.

I teach fitness classes too, and I can feel my fitness started to be impacted and I am starting to feel so so self conscious about how i look, clothes I put on the day that fitted me a year ago are WAY too small like they wouldnt even force closed on me.

I have tried talking to one or two people but they just dont get it ... they say * oh you will be fine its just a phase* or * you know what to do we all have bad days*... but this is more than that - yes I know what to do but why why why can't i motivate myself to do it ?

I run a pretty active online support tool helping others but I feel such a fraud at times with how I am feeling myself, and its become so obsessive now that all I seem to think about is food - weight - exercise ..... how much food i have eaten - how much i now am gaining and why i am not exercising. Its as though i really am going backwards at such a fast pace.

Anyway, I am a very positive person in general but this one aspect is really really starting to depress me. I don't even know where to start, i go through all the motions of goal setting, planning, starting to prepare meals but then it always goes up in smoke.

I can't use slimming clubs as I am known in the area from a fitness point of view and people would see that as a major joke if i was then to go to a club and cant even practice what i preach myself - and rightly so I guess.

* sigh *

Feeling so disheartened now.

loved the support and motivation when I used here before,


Mr. Constant Cravings

 

[The Caretaker]

Welcome CC, If you feel that a slimming club/group would do what you want then go to one out of town thats what i do, because i don't want to go to any near me as i'm known in the area good luck you seem to be lacking motivation? i don't know what I can say about that but I was on the brink of losing my job because of my weight!!! that was motivation enough for me Good luck mate and keep us informed of your progress

 

[jayde1148]

Hi hun, I can feel your pain. It's not easy losing weight and I know I could have been at goal ages ago but for some reason I just couldn't do it! I think with binge eating and emotional eating you have to get to the route of why you are doing it. Sometimes it is habit from years ago, maybe a particular emotion you have not had for a while has resurfaced and your subconscious is driving you past instinct to eat. I find trying to slow down and actually ask myself if I'm hungry helps and in my kind saying things like thus cake us nit going to change the fact that I feel sad. I'm working on it and I think that is all you can do hun. The more you get stressed over it the more you will eat if you eat for emotional reason, and I'm pretty certain binging is to do with emotional eating.

Take one day or week at a time and remember how far you have come not the negatives xxx