Time to do this...

[Rohanya]

Hi everyone,

I'm new here and came across this forum while looking through and I feel like this may be the place for me - I hope you'll have me!

I've been 'big' my whole life (size 16 at about 14, currently a 22 at 24) and I have no one but myself to blame for this. I feel like I've missed out on so much being as big as I am with little self confidence and hitting that low again recently feeling like I'm stuck in so many areas of my life due to my weight (self imposed, I'm sure of it.) I decided that it's time to give fixing it a serious go. I joined SW Online a few days ago and I've already started making the changes I need to make - no more junk food in the house, a fridge full of yummy, healthy food and a commitment to myself that this has to work this time.

My goal is to lose about half my body weight - aiming for about 10st (although I weigh in kg, weird I know but I find metric works for me when setting targets!) when I'm finished. I weigh about 20st/126 kilos right now which isn't as bad as I thought it was but still pretty bad! I know my goal but I have no idea what it's going to be like to finally get there - I have no experience of being that weight as a teenager or an adult! Is it weird that I find that the scary thing, not the actual losing weight side of it? I don't know how I'm going to feel, how I'm going to look, how other people are going to see me and that terrifies me! I know it can only be good for me, but I've been resigned to being 'the big girl of the group' for practically my entire life now that I just don't know any different!

So like I said, I joined Slimming World Online. I can't face joining a group just yet so I've decided to give SWO my three months, see where I get and if I find it works for me (please, please let it work for me!) then I will take myself off to a group and get even more help on my journey.

I have my end goal but I don't really have a timescale. But I have a few things I'd like to be able to achieve:

• I like to think that if I wanted to book myself a summer holiday next year somewhere nice and hot I can do so knowing that I'm not going to feel like the beached whale on the beach (something that happened a few years ago in Italy... I loved being there but hated the way I felt going down to the beach... I've avoided holidays since!).
• I also want to be able to go to New Look or any other high street shop and be able to buy whatever the heck I want! New Look has been brilliant to me as a larger girl these last few years, but I would love to be able to buy anything in their range and not be limited to the corner of the store.
• I want to get back on a horse. This is my absolute dream and I know that if I can get to about 15st I can go back to the stables I went to as a teenager as they have a few heavy horses that will have no problem taking me!

I hope I can get there, and I hope that I will be able to share my achievements with you knowing that I have made that commitment and stuck to it.

Fingers crossed, eh?

 

[Estameme]

Welcome! It's great to have you here and I look forward to getting to know you and watching your progress towards a healthy you! If there's one thing I've learnt from being here is that there is no clear cut one-fits-all plan. As you begin to control your portion sizes, make healthy choices, and move your body, you'll begin to get in touch with your body.You may slide straight into what works or may need to tweak things but as long as your trying then your winning.

i can relate to the scary feeling of losing weight. In my 20s i was 20stone. I lost half my body weight and I found the affect it had on my relationships was almost as interesting as the transformation of my body. There were people in my life that were so happy for me, there were people who hadn't given me the time of day when I was fat that suddenly wanted to be my friend (no way, Jose), and there were a few that really didn't want me to lose weight (my sister). Every time she saw me she said 'oh no, you've lost more weight, your aren't you anymore'. Luckily I could see what that really meant was she was having to realign where she felt she fit (the prettier thinner one of us) and I knew that was her issue, not mine. I went through a stage of feeling too small. I wasn't used to people being able to pick me up, wrap their arms around me - it initially made me feel weak but after a while my mind caught up. I guess change of any kind can be scary. Have you ever been through a big change in your life which you've come out the other side of? If so, you'll know that the fear passes and it becomes normality after a while. You can do this, for your health, your self esteem, and because you deserve it.

Keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We'll be cheering you on. Essie x

 

[chezz]

roanya
welcome great people on here will support you all way through your journey good look love x x

 

[ladyfelsham]

Hi Rohanya and welcome :wavey:

Really delighted to see you here, and look forward to hearing how you get on - I think you will love SW, I know I do

 

[Rohanya]

Thanks for the welcome ladies!

My handy little books from SW came today so I am far better equipped to pick out the best things for me to eat (or not eat!). I'm feeling pretty positive about this! The biggest issue is going to be getting everything synced so it's not a free for all in the kitchen each night. I'm thankful that my parents are actively supporting me and will help me get the things I need and make meals the best way they can to help me along the way. Going to take some coordinating though, my sister is on her variation of Dukan, dad's not mightily impressed with my food either (though I'm sure he'll be just fine once we work out ways to cook our favourite meals that are as low-syn as possible for me, and discover new meals that we can all enjoy!) - but I'm in that not quite ready phase of eating salads and whatever I can muddle together that's as free as possible because we've not had time to sit down and do some meal plans or recipes.

I feel much better in myself already, I think eating far more fruit and veg than normal and drinking more water is doing the world of good. Just got to keep it up!

 

[Rohanya]

My first weigh in today and YAY. I've lost 2.1kg! It's going to be more than that because not long before I started up with this again I weighed in at 128 so I've lost about 4kg in a couple of weeks. I'm delighted. I really want to get under 120 in the next couple of weeks, that'll be a weight I won't have seen for a couple of years now.

Onwards!

 

[Estameme]

That's brilliant! Well done!

 

[ladyfelsham]

Well done Rohanya!

 

[Rohanya]

Thank you!

Had a great weekend, got lots more healthy food in and I attempted a syn free (but using my A allowance) carbonara which turned out great - I could live off the stuff! Slight blip today, made a salad for my lunch but promptly left it in the car after being dropped off to catch my bus to work... I can't think of a relatively low impact option for lunch round where I work - the syn values aren't good.

That said, I passed my driving theory test today (yay!) so I might allow myself a little treat and not be too worried about going for a greggs or something. Done well to avoid the place this last few weeks but I think I can forgive myself if I go today.

I'm feeling so positive about this, I hope I can continue feeling this good about my journey!

 

[snowbryneich]

Well done on passing your theory test, if you have a greggs nearby and are looking for a low syn option they have some low ish syn pasta pots (low syn compared to 20 for a sandwich or 25 for a pasty anyway!)

Greggs Tuna Layered Salad with Spiralli Pasta ( per pack )		4½
Greggs Chicken & Bacon Layered Salad with Spiralli Pasta ( 211g pack )		6
Greggs Fajita Chicken Pasta Pot ( 300g pot )		4

 

[Rohanya]

Oooh thanks, I'll see if mine has any of those. They're generally not too good on the salad/pasta stock though so hopefully if I go a bit early I can see if they have some today!

 

[Estameme]

Congrats on passing your theory test! Walking past Greggs kills me, the smell of sausage rolls, oh my days, nommm.

Youre doing brilliantly, keep it up!

 

[Rohanya]

I didn't cave! I went in fully intending to be naughty and get a baguette or something but nope. My conscience got the better of me and out I came with the chicken and bacon salad! Nowhere near as good for me as the totally free one I left in the car this morning but certainly far better for me than a baguette would have been.

Getting there, one small victory at a time.

 

[KateR]

Hiya!

Just popping in to subscribe as I saw you on one of the other posts. Well done on resisting temptation and going for the salad! I'd have probably been face first into a ham and cheese pasty!

I know what you mean about being able to get on a horse. I used to ride competitively - I would LOVE to be able to event again! So much fun!

Oh and well done on passing your driving test!!

Kate

 

[Rohanya]

Hiya!

Just popping in to subscribe as I saw you on one of the other posts. Well done on resisting temptation and going for the salad! I'd have probably been face first into a ham and cheese pasty!

I know what you mean about being able to get on a horse. I used to ride competitively - I would LOVE to be able to event again! So much fun!

Oh and well done on passing your driving test!!

Kate

Hello! And thank you!

I'd LOVE to ride competitively! I never got that far when I was learning, mainly because I was a teenager in with a load of little kids so I got as far as cantering and low jumps but nothing more adventurous than that! Now I'm older with a job when I do get to the weight for it I'll get solo lessons or adult groups if I can find them, I really want to get back on a horse!

One day. Though I do hope I can get to that stage this year, that'd be the best thing if I can!

 

[ladyfelsham]

T I attempted a syn free (but using my A allowance) carbonara which turned out great

Recipe please!

Congrats on passing your theory test! Walking past Greggs kills me, the smell of sausage rolls, oh my days, nommm!

OMG me too - and all the rest. Pastry is my utter downfall!

I didn't cave!

Well done love, well done! Strange but good when it happens - I thought during WI tonight, "Oooh I'll have battered fish and chips tonight" (Monday is treat night) - and instead I came home and had turkey and mash

 

[Rohanya]

I caved and I feel so guilty. Had a takeaway on Monday with my sister and it definitely wasn't a good idea...

I can't handle that sort of food anymore. Don't get me wrong I loved it and my brain tells me I could eat a bucket load of the stuff but my body is telling me "Please not again". If I feel the need in future, we're sharing one - I can't handle a full takeout anymore!

BACK.ON.PLAN.

 

[ladyfelsham]

Don't worry about it hun - you've learnt from it and now it's time to move on xxx

 

[chezz]

roanya
do not worry its a new day now most of us have done it least you have come back and your going to be back on it

 

[Rohanya]

WI today - stayed exactly the same. Pretty pleased actually considering I weighed myself a few days ago and I weighed 4lbs more(!). One takeaway shouldn't have done that to me if it'd lasted till WI this morning. I think my issue is actually that I'm not eating enough! I'm finding it really hard to come up with breakfast ideas that I like that isn't fruit, fruit and more fruit (which is okay, I enjoy it, but I think I need to be putting something more substantial into my system!) and my lunches are usually nothing more than a mugshot and, you guessed it, more fruit. I'm eating proper dinners which is great but I'm becoming aware that if SW is going to work for me I need to listen to what it tells me - don't go hungry, make sure you eat and that you eat till you're full (on the free foods, anyway!!).

I'm off work all this week so I'm going to try and eat more at the times I need to eat and see if that affects next weeks WI. I need to get used to this and how it's going to work for me!