Thank ladies for caring about me.
Feeling depressed and a failure as I have TOTALLY failed to reach the goal stated in the very name of this journal.
I was supposed to have dropped from 352lb to 266lb by Maundy Thursday. In reality, I was 329 yesterday. So I only lost 23lb and not the 84lb I had promised.
Maybe this is why we should never set a weight as a goal?
I've been really ill for a few days. THIS TIME it was an allergic reaction to the antibiotics that I have been put on long term to cure the bacterial infection of the lungs that causes me to have unpredictable, terrifying asthma attacks. My lack of appetite over the past couple of weeks allowed me to lose 10lb in 10 days. However, that lack of appetite then led to complete anorexia when the fever/chills and other horrid side effects flared up.
I found I was unable to eat ANYTHING that I have at home, from the fruit and yoghurt to the home-made "ready meals" that I made and froze myself. Everything I looked at in the fridge, cupboards and freezer totally failed to interest me; in fact I found it all really unpalatable and walked away, having eaten nothing.
I started getting the shakes and blurred vision through lack of food. I was too ill to go to the surgery but spoke to doc on the phone and she said it was important that I eat well to keep up my strength and to avoid these hypoglycaemic episodes.
The only thing I could face to eat was junk food from takeaways. Even then, when I cast my eye over the menus I was struggling to find anything I could bear the thought of eating. I ended up having chicken doner kebab meat in a wrap one night and a Chinese meal the next. The only other meal I had on those days was home made lentil soup for breakfast, so I don't think I went over 2,000 calories either day.
Yesterday I could not face any food at all, and ended up eating nothing but chocolate all day :-( Must have had over 1,000 calories in chocolate!
By the evening I managed another chicken wrap kebab and half a portion of chips (threw away the rest).
Have regained 4lb in 4 days.
Still not 100%. Can't breathe... nose blocked one minute then streaming the next. Still on Ventolin. Walking a short way leaves me breathless, but I am trying to do 2 to 3 minutes jiggling to music either standing or sitting. I'm tired, breathless, fed up and miserable. I have a guest arriving any minute to spend a week with me and I am really going to struggle to make myself good company.
So, it's no longer 25 stone to 19 stone in 8 months, but 25 stone to 23 stone in 8 months