Aspergers Advice.

[Isobel1965]

Hi Cheb - I can quite understand your rage at your boy being put on the SEN register. I was livid when my eldest girl was put on it, Level 1, without my prior knowledge, when she was 6.

It was for her 'lack of social skills' apparently which meant that she got upset when other children wouldn't be friends with her and she was very weepy.

I explained to the teacher that her father was an alcoholic and that life at home was rather strained, which might explain her tearfulness and that it would have been preferable for someone to have raised any concerns with me before stigmatising my child. I was a secondary school teacher at the time and knew damn well that the funding system had recently changed from the ratio of children receiving free school meals to the ratio of children on the SEN register. At my own school, I was expected, as Head of Year, to compile lists of kids to go on the SEN register purely to bump up the funding. Not only did I abhore this on moral grounds, but it also produce reams of paperwork which took time away from actually teaching and caring for the kids. Senseless!!

It was very rude of the school not to inform you of their 'decision' prior to the list being drawn up and the lack of a personalised letter implies to me that it was a large mailshot that went to many parents. Either that or the admin secretary hasn't been trained in mailmerge (don't get me started!!).

If I were you, I'd strongly request another meeting to voice my concerns!!

Hope things get better for you, hun!

 

[HellyBelly]

Take a deep breath

My Friend,

It is terrible that you have got that letter from that useless woman. You know she isn't typical of the school as a whole though. Of course, you should go in and sort it out - speak to Mrs H, you know how supportive she is and will continue to be. Remember, SB isn't going to be actively involved with DS, more than likely. As I have said before, no one really knows what she does anyway. Obviously, she just writes mindless letters to worry parents even more!

You are doing the right thing for DS having him referred. He only has a few months left at this school and he will need all the help he can get in the transition to new school. Listen to Kelly, the SEN at Filsham is great and Katy is doing grand there.

You will be fine - he will be fine! You are great people with lots of support from family, school and of course fantastic friends. You rant whenever you want my love! My shoulders are always here for you.

Lots of love
Helly
X

 

[Mini]

I saw Dr. Alex Richardson on tv 3 this morning and she has a very good book out called "They are what you feed them"

She has also got a web site. You can read a few pages from her book and I found what she had to say very interstering and again she is talking about EPA & DHA and that lack of these in our diets.

The new book from Dr Alex Richardson


The new book from Dr Alex Richardson

 

[Cheb]

My DS has an appointment at the Cild Development Clinic tomorrow to be assesed for Aspergers. This is following a visit at home last week when I had a 2 hour pre-assesment questionnaire to answer to give lots of background.

Doeas anyone know what I should expect tomorrow and what sort of points or questions I should be raising. Don't want to find myself tongue tied.

I am taking with me a report from his teacher, his Individual Learning Plan from SENCO, a summary letter from a counsellor/Inclusive Learning Tutor who he was referred to but unfortunately would not work with. Anything else I should take? School reports?

Thanks for any info you can give me.

 

[Isis]

If it were me hun, I would take anything and everything you have relating to your Son's education, development, behaviour traits, personality, social skills....the lot!

I know if i have an important appointment and don't want to forget something, I write a short list before I go about the questions I want answers to before I leave the room.

Hope this helps a bit

 

[Mini]

Be sure to let us know how it goes.

My nephew who is 22 years of age was only diagnosed last year after he found the pressure of university too much and he left.

Now with help and understanding he is hoping to go back this year and finish his degree.

Love Mini xxx

 

[Geri]

Morning Cheb,
agree with Isis, take everything you can.. You sound like you're well prepared with everything already, and they will have got a lot of info from the form you filled out last week.

I'll be thinking of you today hun...

 

[Isobel1965]

Good luck for today, hun!

xxxxxx

 

[Cheb]

Thank you all so much for your thoughful replies.

I'm feeling really nervous today, first hurdle will be to get DS out of school without him kicking off:sigh:

Just going to get out his school reports to take along expect I'll have a little weep as I read through them! Mind best to get that out the way at home so I can be less emotional at the hospital. Stupid I know but I always seem to end up crying for no reason when I try to describe how my boy ticks in an effort to get others to understand him.

Thanks again.

 

[Mini]

My heart goes out to you Cheb, sending hugs and much love.

Hope all goes well and you get the answers you need to move forward.

Love Mini xxx

 

[Cheb]

Hello

(just copying this from my diary)


Had a very long appointment with the consultant who has diagnosed DS with Aspergers. No great surprise to me but I was surprised that she was so definitive. She says it is very obvious and that he is very typical. I feel a sense of relief in having someone agree with me cos my family and in particular DH never accepted that our son may have Aspergers. I also feel confused about what happens next - not much it seems - and quite sad thinking about his future which it seems may not be all that we/he would wish for. The consultant painted quite a black picture on how he may or may not cope with secondary school, her advise is for to be a 'pushy parent' a role that does not come naturally to me.

As yet we have not discussed the diagnosis with DS, he was not present at that point. So that's the next hurdle as one of the main make up's of his character is that there's nothing wrong with him, it's everybody else that is odd!

Oh well, we have to deal with all that life offers us, my son is healthy and mostly happy, he is very intelligent and has a loving family around him. He hasn't changed simply because it's acknowledged that he has a 'condition' so we carry on as before but with perhaps a little more knowledge and understanding.


If anyone has any pointers of what I should be doing to help my son with his transition to secondary school I'd be very grateful. The consultants wants me to try for an assesment with the educational psycologist with a view to getting a Statement for him. It's like a new language to me, who decides if he gets to be statemented and who does it? And what difference will it make to my sons education? Could it hinder future employemnt prosepects i.e. would there be a stigma?

Oh questions, questions........I didn't think about any of this before!

 

[Mini]

Hi Cheb,

It will take time for it all to sink in as even though you expected as much, it still can come as a bit of a shock. But now you can work with your son from here and get him the right support and help to reach his full potential.

Here is a well articulated personal account of what it is like to be Asperger by Colin Freeman.

Asperger East Anglia - Personal Experience

A lot of scientist, engineers, doctors and consultants have Aspergers.


Another interesting article.

[FONT=verdana, helvetica, arial, sans-serif]Autism - and its milder cousin Asperger's syndrome - is surging among the children of Silicon Valley. Are math-and-tech genes to blame?[/FONT]

Wired 9.12: The Geek Syndrome

Professor Simon Baron-Cohen is director of the Autism Research Centre.

Autism Research Centre - ARC Staff : 33


Love Mini xxx

 

[Isis]

Bumping this up for Flirty