Barb's Fabulous Food Diary!

[Barb]

Thanks Jules! Welcome back KD, thought you'd gone off me!
You should be pleased with your 'pupil' - I finally feel like I am understanding so much more. A lot of what you have explained to me in the past i have tried to grasp but couldn't get rid of my old 'habits/patterns' enough to take on new ideas. I don't know why suddenly things have clicked, but they have. I have finally got to grips with the choice thing, my choice. It feels very empowering, like I had no idea before and now I do.
I am also being so much kinder to myself, happy to have a one stone loss, even though it has taken nearly 3 months to do it. Time was I would have been beating myself up for not doing better.
Finally the down grading of the importance of food. I realise that I have always given it too much attention and thought. As the Mum of a big family I think that is reasonable but I use it for so many things unconnected with hunger and thats not good. I know there will always be times when I still do that, only occasionally I hope, but if I can limit that then I know I am winning.

So, I am going into Christmas happy; not dreading an inevitable weight gain, it's my choice after all, so there will only be a gain if I make the choices that cause it! Happy to have lost some weight and made a good start on my final journey to good health and confident that 2008 will be a healthier happier year.

 

[KD]

Welcome back KD, thought you'd gone off me!

You should be so lucky Just been dealing with my own issues:sigh: Seems that you've stolen all my control Hey! Give it back. It's mine

I don't know why suddenly things have clicked, but they have. I have finally got to grips with the choice thing, my choice. It feels very empowering, like I had no idea before and now I do.

There...see... it's that lightbulb moment. I had it myself. You can know the stuff, but it's hard to make it your own, to truly internalize it, until 'suddenly'. Then it all makes sense.

Keep up the good work Barb :clap:

 

[Barb]

Oh Karion, I hope you are ok, not often you sound a bit down. Here comes a big hug, that might help!

I haven't really stolen your control, it's just you've shared yours with me - I am very grateful and I think you will find the rest of yours in the cupboard under the stairs. Have a quick look.

I am fascinated by the 'lightbulb moment' - I didn't really believe it before but i do now! It's such a treat for my positive stuff to outweigh my negative. Instead of the constant barrage of ' there's no point in cutting down now, you'll be having that enormous meal out later' I get ' eat as lightly as you can now, just a bit of fruit would do to keep you going, after all you've got that nice meal out later and if you eat carefully now it won't be a problem weight loss wise!' It;s quite a twist.

The scales have become so much less important too and I think that is a very key thing. I still get on them most days but I pay a lot less attention to what they say because I know that I am eating more sensibly and that sooner or later the numbers will drop. There's no rush. I've got the rest of my life. I know I would be upset if they suddenly showed a big gain but thats not going to happen, there is no reason why it should. I'm in control of this body and I am going to feed it well and not give it rubbish or more than it needs! Firm but fair, thats me!

 

[clairejen]

Wow Barb, you are doing really well. It seems like you are replacing the old habit eating with a proper "eat it for pleasure" eating, so much better than the sense of denial most dieting produces. By Christmas you will have been doing this for three months, and you sound like you could happily continue indefinitely. Well done.

 

[Barb]

Thanks Claire, it certainly does feel good. Not worrying about Christmas food is great too; I'll have what I really want but I won't eat for the sake of it or because I feel under pressure from others.
Had a very trying day yesterday; my Mum rang to say the house next door to theirs was on fire! they live in a terrace and are both very elderly so you can imagine how horrified i was. DH and I belted down there (longest 2o minute trip ever) only to find my Dad outside in the rain watching the firemen and my Mum still indoors in a haze of smoke! They are very lucky, apart from smoke making their house smelly there is no damage, next door is burnt right out, all the windows gone and the four dogs that were in the house all died. So we aired their house as best we could and I think apart from being very shaken by events they are doing ok. Phew!

Thats enough excitement for this year!

 

[clairejen]

OMG how awful, and those poor dogs! What is it ith house fires atthe moment, that's the third I've heard of in the past week (admittedly they are spread worldwide but it still seems excessive).

 

[Barb]

Well the traumas have settled down, Mum and Dad are still a little shaky and am not surprised. They are just beginning to realise what a lucky escape they have had!

I have been very,very busy and am not getting on here much. Still, one more lb down this week so that's great!

 

[Barb]

Realised that next Wednesday sees the end of my original 13 week challenge, when I hoped and planned to lose 10lbs. I have done that and a bit more and still feel very positive. I am not writing in my diary as much as I was but most days sees something written down and some days every morsel. I am gaining confidence about my decision making; there is no real need to write down cup of tea and one biscuit as I know that is all I ever have now! Wow, that was nice to write down!
I am going into Christmas with a totally different mindset and I really don't expect to put on, I am going to balance the days and eat what I really want. I won't feel deprived, I don't now. It's just a case of not mindlessly eating, easy to slip back into, I know that. There was a tin of Quality street going round at work yesterday and I had eaten 5-6 before i even thought about it. I stopped. Even took note of the fact that I felt a bit sick from the sugar!

So keep learning and taking note of my own behaviour and I will win this battle. I definately think I am onto something at last!

 

[Barb]

Another busy weekend - family get together Saturday night which was fun. Busy week ahead and then ... CHRISTMAS!

Feeling fairly organised and looking forward to Wednesday, the end of 13 week 10lb challenge. I shall then draw a line under it and look forward to continued success in January. Going to really be mindful of what and why I am eating over Chrimbo and not lose sight of all the stuff I've learnt.

 

[Barb]

Well Wednesday is here and my 13 week challenge is over - 15lbs off and I am already looking forward to the start of my new challenge on the 2nd of Jan 2008.

However, whilst this challenge is 'over', it isn't really. I am going to carry on doing what I have been doing and I hope to get to the 2nd of Jan at least having STS or even with a lb off. I refuse to allow Christmas to get in the way of what I have chosen for my future. So, I may not visit my diary as often for the next couple of weeks and I may eat and drink a little bit more, but it will be my choice all the way and not just a mad food fest for the sake of it. I will be on and off here over the holidays but I guess everyone will be a little busier than usual!

I wish everyone a very Happy and Healthy Christmas and a Wonderful New Year.

 

[Dom1979]

Well done Barb!

Here's to you and me (and everyone else) getting what we want in 2008! It's the 'Rest of My Fabulous Life' challenge!

D x

 

[Barb]

I like that Dom ' the rest of my fabulous life challenge' - I think I will have to adopt it. Lets look forward together to a really brilliant 2008, full of all the things we really want in life.

Love

 

[Dom1979]

I like that Dom ' the rest of my fabulous life challenge' - I think I will have to adopt it. Lets look forward together to a really brilliant 2008, full of all the things we really want in life.

Love

Well, that settles it then! 2008 marks the beginning of the 'Rest of My Fabulous Life' Challenge!

'See' you soon, and thanks for calming me down the other day. You rock!

 

[Barb]

Cripes, is it really a week since I wrote in this diary? What a busy time it's been, but mostly really great.

Had a wonderful family Christmas, it could not have been better. On Christmas Eve I cut my hand quite badly and had to go to A+E, glue and steri-stripped later and unable to cook dinner, I was worried! I needn't have been; DH and kids pitched in and we all worked together to produce a lovely lunch for 10! Never again will I sweat and curse in the kitchen whilst other folk have fun. It just proved what could be done when the work is shared. So much nicer all round.

Lots of lovely pressies, including LOADS of chocolates. Definately need to get back to good habits very soon. Still, it is Christmas and I must admit I have enjoyed the yummy stuff!

Hope everyone else has had/is having a fab time too.

 

[KD]

Oh goodness about your hand. How's it feeling now?

 

[Barb]

Hi KD, quite a bit better now, I'm pleased to say. It is sore but less swollen now and I can take the bandage off in about a week from today. It really changed the whole Christmas though, but weirdly in a good way. Made me realise what a lucky person i am to have such a fab family.

I think I will have a small scar but a very neat one as it was done with a brand new sharp knife!!!!

Hope your Christmas was good Karion, I know you were feeling pretty stressed beforehand.

Love

 

[KD]

Yeah, it was good thanks Barb Trouble with Christmas is that it comes at a very bad time of year for me. Work is manic for the 6-8 weeks beforehand, and home Christmas preparations tend to get left behind

Anyway, got to speak properly with DS1s girlfriend (who he now lives with). She's lovely. Mature, intelligent, understanding

Did the traditional 100+ questions DS1 pulled me up on it, but the girlfriend told him to be quiet, I was just doing my job

As for the food. You know, they say the average Brit eats about 7,000 cals on Christmas Day. I think that's about right

Wouldn't be so bad if it was just Christmas day, but there are so many 'excuse days' either side

Still...have to take some time off work in a couple of weeks and have to make up for lost work time, so back to the grindstone a little earlier than normal. That'll help me get back into the routine :clap:

 

[Barb]

Glad to hear the meet with Ds1's girl went well - it's a tricky situation always, but it sounds like it's going to shake down just fine.

I'm ok, spent an interesting hour or so wading through the archives on here and finding last years 'new year diary'. It's scary how much sounds exactly the same. I was saying/thinking along very similar lines to now. Which I find worrying because weight wise I am about exactly where I was this time last year having gained a stoneish and lost a stoneish.

However, I can see where things started slipping big time and it looks like I had several months away from MM's from late Jan to May. I know I was poorly and on steroids at the time so probably I lost heart. Trouble is February is often a month that my chest plays up and I end up on heavy duty drugs. Even now I am consious that I have had to increase my preventers, which is helping but does effect my mood. Bu**er!

Anyway, to be informed is to be able to make informed choices. So, I know that too casual an approach and i slip off my promises very easily. I know that illness will effect my determination, so I must find strategies to deal with that if it happens. I know that if I am too strict then I rebel, so how do I deal with my 'fabulous new life challenge'?
I think the way forward is to do what Karion has suggested; use the knowledge i have gained over years of dieting to formulate a plan I can live with.
So I am going to write a rough plan showing what foods I like that are good for me, making notes of some easy light lunches etc.. I am going to use the JUDD philosophy a little too, having at least one very lean day a week to bring my overall cals down. I am not going to go into the new year unpre-pared. This is a battle and no-one should go into battle without working out how to beat the enemy!

More later, I've worn myself out with all that brain work so early on a Sunday!

 

[KD]

Fab post Barb!!!

 

[Barb]

Thanks KD - um 3 words though? Have you run out again?