Blergh! - FatFairNForty(ish) - my diary

[Eclipse]

So glad things are sorted. Hope you slept well.

 

[punkass]

Hey Jennie

Been away for a few days so only just seen your worried thread... glad you have it sorted now, hope you are feeling happier and much better about the situation

Kxx

 

[Karen1972]

I think we all over analyse things sometimes and naturally look for the negatives in even fantastic things in our lives. So try not to worry, relax and go with the flow.

Not sure what you mean about his situation as i don't think you shared that with us have you? altho i seem to remember that he still lives in the same house as his ex, is that right? Tell me to bugger off if i'm being too nosy! ha!

I'm glad you've sorted things out though... but this is one of the reasons i like being single at the moment, it's just so stressful when you like a bloke so much and you lose control of your emotions!!!

Catch you soon honey,

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Hello my friends, thank you for your lovely messages. Mr K and I had a very very long heart to heart last night and, if anything, things are even better now for it. I'm seeing him tonight and have had a manic morning at work and am off now to play taxi to Zoe before rushing home to prepare for this evening. I got a really good rest last night and feel loads better for that too. Will be back either tomorrow or late tonight after my date (prob tomorrow though).

Thanks again for your messages, texts and PMs. I'm glad I don't have days like yesterday too often!
xxxxx

 

[KateF]

I'm glad you don't too- you don't deserve them!

Glad things are feeling better. You and Mr K sound like you have such good tools of communication. Amid the uncertainty of lives, pasts, fears, projections, hopes, what ifs and maybes, there's nothing like the honest talking of two people who are able to be in the here and now with themselves and each other.
You have that. So I have hope and I know you do too.

xx

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

What great advice and support you all give xx

Perhaps he was in a pensive mood as well, I dunno. Its very difficult sometimes to prevent our moods coming across differently on the telephone. Hopefully it will all sort itself out once you have met again.

You were right, thank you

{{{{{{big hugs hun}}}}}}}
You need more sleep and some chill out time...... that's what I found has helped..... slow down, you move to fast, you gotta make some time for you..... Love

You were right too - sleep made a massive difference and I'm going to take your advice and try and slow down a bit too..

.. it's difficult once you get a worry or negative thought in your head, especially regarding a relationship to see through or past it. Luckily you're seeing Mr K tomorrow & face to face will make things a lot clearer. I so hope it's nothing Jennie, you've sounded so happy lately, & it's all been going so well with your lovely Mr K. Will be sending lots of positive vibes to you. Isn't it always the way that after a fab day we end up so down the following - just mean & nasty that is

Again ! This makes it a triple - you're so right too! Those positive vibes worked too

Hey hun... TOTM and tiredness can send us women off the rails and think far too much... things have been going fab with Mr. K so have the chat with him tomorrow and everything will be fine

.and Gen makes 5 !

Take time for you and relax honey.
With regards to Mr. K? Who knows but you and he …. just take each day at a time … although I guess you already know that.

Sound advice and yep... that makes it 6 of you who are now fully qualified for a big hug and pat on the back for being spot on!

Glad to hear it hun - hope my texts helped and you understood what I meant..... me simple soul me is Miss Jennie......lol

your texts meant a lot to me and yes, I understood

You feel a million percent better? Now go get some much needed sleep, I am so relieved for you

me too, me too Sleep is something I plan to do a lot of this weekend! Hope you are feeling lots better now xxx

Glad you're feeling better - hope you get a good nights sleep & catch you in the morning

thanks MD

Sometimes we can drown in our thoughts and feelings, so it's good to talk it through with the respective parties involved. -

absolutely right CC , thanks again

So glad things are sorted. Hope you slept well.

Me too hon, and yes, I did

..hope you are feeling happier and much better about the situation. Kxx

thanks Kirstin, I am, loads! Good to see you

I think we all over analyse things sometimes and naturally look for the negatives in even fantastic things in our lives. So try not to worry, relax and go with the flow

this is true and even more good advice! lol (and not the first time I have been told to do so either )

Glad things are feeling better. You and Mr K sound like you have such good tools of communication. Amid the uncertainty of lives, pasts, fears, projections, hopes, what ifs and maybes, there's nothing like the honest talking of two people who are able to be in the here and now with themselves and each other. You have that. So I have hope and I know you do too. xx

Oh Kate, thank you. Made me smile and weep at the same time (but in a good way). Yes, I have hope too Thanks for dropping in.. will catch up on things this weekend.

You are all incredibly lovely people, thank you for the last week or so especially. I dunno. TOTM, tiredness.. etc etc.. it certainly does take it's toll and I'm thinking I might even make my curfew 10.30pm now as my work is getting more involved and I find that I relish more sleep.. lol (mebbe I'm just getting old! LOL)

Finally finished writing about Portsmouth - in future, I'm gonna take my battered old lappy with me and write as I'm there and then whack it on a floppy and do the good old copy and paste the minute I get home! lol Still... next meet isn't for a few weeks now so life will calm down a tad and I'll be able to get up to date with everyone else! I feel like I've been very selfish since the beginning of the year - so.. time to address that!!

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Saturday night in Portsmouth..

Saturday 27th January - Portsmouth - continued..

Cah Ching came up to my room so we could continue chin wagging, lol, and that’s precisely what we did – I showed her my impulse buy (orange handbag) and I could see she really liked it. I also showed her the new pants I’d got in exchange for the dress I would now never wear (wonder if I ever shall pluck up the courage to wear a dress again…).. anyway, we had a real giggle and I showed her the mountain of clothes I brought with me (never knowingly under-packed – that’s me! ) in the hope that she could help me choose what to wear. We kind of agreed on the green sparkly top that Mich and I bought in New Look.. as time was passing way too quickly she went to her room to get ready and I got ready too.

What a fab shower :tear_drop: !! I was bright red after - dead powerful.. it was lovely! Hair dryer was mounted on the wall next to a full length mirror – sobering sight! Butt nekkid and drying hair ! lol (try NOT to picture it please!!)

Took me over an hour to dry my hair and straighten it and finally decide on my outfit.. I decided to take CC’s advice and wear the sparkly.. and when Cheryl (Pandora) knocked for me I was still umming and ahhing , lol, I never used to be so indecisive – I guess it will only get worse as my choices increase!!

Cheryl looked stunning – she had transformed herself and her hair was fantastic – looked like she had been to a stylist! We headed down to the lobby.. once there we saw the vision that was Cah Ching! Well… WOW.. she always looks dead stylish but this evening she was absolutely incredible !! She could easily have been mistaken for a model! Eclipse (Cheryl) and her hubby (Ash) were already there, Eclipse looked fabulous – damn she’s so lovely and slim! Lol (Still think she should have kept her fluffy feathery pink name badge on ) We all sat and chatted and then Debbie (Russian Doll) arrived – another WOW moment.. I know I keep saying stunning, but seriously, she was! Another one who looked a million dollars! As for Lynnjo – what a fabulous figure and boy she looked young and glamourous. Seriously wondered how the men of Porstmouth were going to cope with such a good-looking shower! Lol Then Luckymarge and BGSam joined us.. they had been out for dinner and had lost track of time through gas-bagging ,..lol.. so we carried on chatting whilst they went to get ready.

I was getting very cheesed off with my top – there is a strappy top underneath it and it kept slipping down and revealing my bra, and I was not happy.. so… Cah Ching came to the rescue!! She suggested using safety pins and promptly went back to fetch one from her room! Eclipse asked her hubby to go and get some from their room too! A few minutes later and I have Cah Ching pinning my top to my bra straps and the next I have Eclipse pinning my top to the middle of my bra too! lol So.. secure now that nothing will be displayed that I don’t want to display, and just in time as Sam and Margaret arrived. Sam was wearing a lush green velvet top and trousers – what slim legs! I’m sure I wasn’t the only one to be envious! She looked beautiful, Her complexion is that of a young girl – you’ll see all this from the millions of photos we all took I’m sure.. lol Margaret looked very beautiful, she had such lovely long very dark (black I think) hair and filmstar features! Seriously classy lady.

So there we were – all together and raring to go! A short walk to Tiger Tiger and Debbie got us all in without a problem. It’s a huge place! Thankfully she had reserved seating for us and , as we worked our way upstairs I could see that I was most definitely old enough to be the mother of just about everyone there (including the bouncers! Lololol),,.. still.. there was some good music from the floor we were going to.. and it turns out it was a live band – but that wasn’t where we were sitting,,.. we got to our seating area and we had a massive sofa (see the pics by Pandora et al) and I headed for the loo,.. (this diet has that effect.. lol).

By the time I got back there was a bottle of water waiting for me (thanks Debbie!) and the music in our area was pretty good.. the place was empty but soon filled up and it wasn’t long before the urge to dance got the better of me and we headed for the dance floor in the next room.

Well, if I just say that I felt a bit like a parent at a school disco.. LMAO… my Zoe would have loved it!! The music was right up her street!! Lol I love the beat but it was hellishly loud and with the strobe lights it was quite an experience! We strutted our stuff and put some of the youngsters to shame.. lol.. several trips to the loo and sitting down to let my eardrums recover.. lots of laughter.. lol and it was soon midnight!

My head was pounding – I don’t often get headaches and I could only think it must be the volume in the dance floor… some of us decided to call it a night and go and sit in the hotel bar for a while. It was nice to get out in the cool night air and the walk was short and refreshing. Once there I nipped up to get my bar (orange).. we sat in the hotel bar and talked until who knows when, and then the others joined us and eventually we could keep our eyes open no longer and called it a night.

I was sad to say goodbye to Debbie :wave_cry: and had missed on saying goodbye to Lynnjo as she had left early because one of her children was unwell . I was so pleased to have met them both, especially the time we had shared in the afternoon - I hope we get to do that again sometime!

So , off to bed, ah bliss.. and I realised why I had my headache! TOTM had arrived (a tad early).. another side effect for me of the diet..

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

The morning after.. Sunday in Portsmouth

Sunday Jan 28th.. the morning after..

Morning came and I was packed and ready (well, nearly) to go and Mr K rang! I was so pleased to talk to him again.. and was sorry to have to cut our chat short as booking out time was 11am and I had promised to meet up with everyone at 10.45

I struggled to the lift with my bags and, fortunately, bumped into a member of staff with an empty trolley and asked if I could be dead cheeky and put my stuff on it! Lol Bless him, he took it all to my car for me and helped me get it all in the boot! (I must make sure not to take so much next trip!). I made it to reception just in time to book out and only just managed to meet everyone before they had to head off home! :wave_cry:

Thankfully Cheryl (Pandora) only lives about an hour from Portsmouth and we both wanted to spend more time with each other (not in an odd way but in a friends way) and we decided to be tourists! Lol So.. goodbyes said to all and we headed off to the quays and the Spinnakker (sp) tower.

On the way I saw a sign advertising boat tours of the harbour for a fiver a head.. so.. with little discussion we both got a ticket and headed for the boat! Lol It was brilliant !! Freezing but brilliant! I love boats, and tours and I had my camera with me and so.. with great company, it was just superb!! We got a running commentary of the sights and , as we were up on the top deck, we had fabulous views! It was bloody freezing but absolutely incredible! I asked one of the other passengers to take our photo and he gladly obliged The tour took about an hour and was well worth the fiver! (if you get the chance to take it – do!).. next it was off to the tower!

We had both said the evening before that we wanted to go up the tower.. so we joined the queue. Another experience worth the cost! I think it was about £6 each this time.. and wowowow the views were amazing!! We both did a ‘first’ too! lol

The first level viewing area had a glass section in the floor. So, with shoes off, I took a deep breath and walked onto it.. I have to admit.. I wondered if it would hold me. . but reasoned that there would be a ‘maximum’ weight sign if there was any doubt! It was weird!! Very odd looking down at your feet and seeing the sea!! Lol One of the members of staff asked if I would like to sit on the glass and have my picture taken!! Well.. I thought.. when am I likely to ever do this again.. so said yes!! (This is very out of character – not the doing something new – the agreeing to have my picture taken!!).. he told me where to sit and I handed over the camera.. lol.. he took the photo and laughed and said I looked like a schoolgirl in it! LOLOLOL He could only have been about 20!

By this time Cheryl had also had a ‘sod it’ moment and she took the step onto the glass too! I took her pic and I think she looks great in it! We were both pretty chuffed with ourselves for doing it.. lol I know there was no real risk, but it was quite a step to take! A chap with his children asked if I would mind taking their picture whilst they were on there., plus one of him lying down face down on the glass! Lol (I wasn’t going to do that) so I took his pic and one of him and his little girl. She was really sweet and gave me her toy chick to look after.. lol

We went up to the next level – it really made you aware of how tiny people are in this world of ours.. the views went for miles and miles… I loved it!! The top level was one you had to go up 5 flights of stairs to, that was a bit exhausting (even though it was only 30 stairs) but for wow factor – fab!! Whilst up there Mr K rang again!!! I told him where I was and who with and tried to describe what I could see… I told him when I thought I would be on the road.. by now it was past 2pm and I was starting to yawn (well, I’m an old gal y’know! ) lol

Once back down to earth, we trotted off to Paper Chase – I saw the most perfect Valentines Card for Mr K but decided not to get it… think I will make one of my own for him The shop was full of wonderful things and we both wandered around it wishing we had unlimited funds! Lol I’d spent all my cash in the tower’s souvenir shop and had left my purse locked in the boot of my car (just as well) lol.. so it was easy to resist! I was impressed at Cheryl’s willpower!

Next (and final) stop was the Paper Mill shop – oh my goodness… for someone who loves stationary I was in seventh heaven!! There were so many different sizes of paper and colours and arty crafty bits.. glues… stickers.. ooh it was bliss! Lol I went out and sat on a bench in the sunshine. Cheryl came out, suitably laden with goodies. We sauntered back to the hotel and said our goodbyes :wave_cry: and set off on our respective journeys.

What a lovely weekend it had been.. the journey home started off well with me not being able to find my way out of the car park.. lol.. and being directed by a very helpful car park attendant who was handing out ‘love heart’ sweeties to people in the traffic! When he offered me some I declined telling him I was on a diet, and, bless him, he told me I had the body of an angel.. ROFL Once on the right road the journey was plain sailing, and, prompted by a call from the lovely Mr K, it passed quickly (well, fairly) and I was home by about 6. I was too tired to go to the pub quiz and was freezing cold too – so I took myself off to bed!

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

and so... up to date at last!! (sorry it's so long winded!)

Wednesday Jan 31st

Felt crap all day and lost the plot for a bit. Got things sorted out in the end, but not one of the better days of late!

Thursday Feb 1st

Mr K woke me with a lovely call I wonder if we shall ever run out of things to talk about - lol Nah - doubt it!

I got up and put some washing in the machine and found a ring that Zoe had ‘lost’ a few weeks ago! I woke her up and she was groggy but happy. Washing in, bag ready for work and off I set. Once at work (very early) I threw myself into the work – I achieved loads today. Not sure why, perhaps because I had a good night’s sleep.. dunno… whatever, it was good.

Zoe rang and asked if I could take here and her boyfriend to her appointment this afternoon , I rang the gym and asked if I could go another time – they said they would get the trainer to call me… so I agreed to take Zoe.. I never did hear from the gym, and, to be honest, I feel terrible for not going today – it’s the first session I have cancelled since I started!!!

I’m hoping to have enough energy to see if I can go tomorrow after work instead . I hope so! Otherwise I have to wait until Tuesday and that’s already going to be an incredible day!! (Job interview). Anyway. Once home I had all the time I needed to get ready for my date.. so .. what do I do?? I made a big bowl of choc mint ‘porridge’ with husks (thanks again RD! )and I have to say, it was hot and very very filling! Think I might start my day like that for the foreseeable! Will have to warn Ailsa that my taste has changed!! Lol thanks to Russian Doll for introducing me to psyllium husks!

I logged on briefly and felt bad for not contributing to all those incredible diaries.. must make a concerted effort now my diary is finally up to date!!


Date with Mr K.

With everything that had happened the day before it was with a mix of excitement and nervousness that I met up with Mr K at a local pub. We had spoken very frankly about my fears and thoughts and, although a lot was resolved, seeing him face to face was altogether different.

We kissed and found a quiet place to sit. We both sat and then it all came pouring out.. all my fears and worries and why I felt as I did, the things he had said.. the things I thought he meant..:cry: all that and more.. and he, very calmly, took my hand.. and told me exactly how HE felt.. I had misunderstood what he had meant and all I could do was sit and cry :cry: whilst he made it very very clear that his feelings have in no way changed . In fact, if anything, they are intensifying. We sat and talked, once I had let him say how he felt, and listened to him, I told him why I had felt so terrible yesterday, and he was so understanding, but at the same time explained how things are for him… I felt so bad about it all, but, in the end, after a long long talk, and not a few tears :cry: on my behalf, things were ok.

In fact, they were far more than ok, and we sat together late into the night.. we went and sat in his car after the pub closed.. and talked some more. We are both definitely singing from the same hymn sheet so to speak in all reagrds, including feelings and hopes and dreams. In fact, he told me about a dream he’d had of me and him in a seaside town.. nothing smutty… just lovely. We talked about our families, our pasts, our hopes for the future.. the challenges that lay ahead.. those already overcome..


It really is going to be a wonderful year for us both.. ultimately. He was thrilled about my weight loss this week and is totally supportive. We can’t wait for the day when we can go out to a lovely restaurant and share a beautiful (healthy) meal together… but in the meantime, it’s pints of water at a countryside pub… perhaps a theatre trip… bowling… who knows.. there are lots of things you can do together that don’t involve food (and no, I don’t meant THAT! Lol).

It was agony saying goodbye this time :wave_cry: – partly because we can’t see one another for another week, but also because we had covered some pretty major topics in our discussions.

There were talks about holidays and things in the future. He reassured me and in the end we were both far happier and confident with our emotions.

All in all, yet another totally different date for us both.. brought us closer still in hearts and minds.. and with a better understanding of how the other is feeling and what is truly important to us both. It was horrendously late when I got home.. and I have no doubt that he will be struggling at work today too.. lol I can’t wait to see him again, and, thankfully, I won’t have too long to wait and I know he feels the same way, and that, for me, is what gives me hope for the future.

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Today - Friday 2nd Feb

Friday Feb 2nd 2007

Mr K was on the phone last night, saying goodnight as we drove apart,, and he had said his phone was going flat.. and then it was!! He said there would be no call this morning as he has a very early start and didn’t want to disturb me.. (although there are those who would say I am already disturbed enough!! ) and then.. at 6.30 I got a call! I was delighted and it meant I got up early enough to go to the market to get some meats for the freezer for my Zoe.. and to get some treats for the dog. (Got there so early the seller wasn't there with the doggy treats so poor Brandy will miss out this week).

Loads of work to get done… (at work).. and lots more jobs to apply for.. another PA job advertised… this time a part time one! In an ideal world I would love to keep my job and get a second job! Who knows.. time will tell I guess.

Tonight I have asked my friend Lynda if she’d like to come over (that means the vac definitely has to come out beforehand!!! Lol That is all I have planned all weekend (well, except for Sunday which I have 4 separate events happening on!

Still, I have all Saturday to relax and chill out (just what the doctor ordered I’d say!! )

Although I think the windows could do with a wash.. and I noticed the crocus's are up and there's a bit of weeding to be done.. and my bedroom is resembling a war zone again....

Right - on with my work now that I have (at last) got up to speed.. thanks for persevering with me!! Patience of saints you lot! xxxx

 

[cah-ching]

Good good Jennie,

So pleased you finally resolved you thoughts and feelings - face to face meetings are always the best.

If he has a younger brother you must introduce me to him ... Mr. K sounds ace. May be I could refer to his younger bro as Mr. T aka Mr. Toaster

Bad joke I know! Sorry.

Seriously - you've got a good 'un there and quite frankly you deserve it and he's lucky. Can't speak for him only for you - I know you.

Love as always ....

 

[pandora]

Hi hun,
its so good to see you are back to your usual upbeat self, i was quite worried about you the other day !
i hope my phone call helped & obviously seeing Mr K again reafirmed all the good things in your relationship. I am so glad about that cos just how you write about him makes me think this is such a good thing for you, but then when i saw you face to face talking about him, you just glowed & your face could lite a dark night.
xx

 

[flirty40greeneyes]

Bloody hell Jenni - between you and Roch's diaries I've just sat on my butt catching up on 6days worth of news!! ....... and I've only read your 2 diaries ... so got all the others to go yet!!

Congrats on the 7lb loss, great you had such a good time in Pompey, pleased to hear about Mr K and you being ok .... oh and good luck for interview on tuesday - now must dash, have all those other diaries to catch up on!

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Good good Jennie, So pleased you finally resolved you thoughts and feelings - face to face meetings are always the best. If he has a younger brother you must introduce me to him ... Mr. K sounds ace. May be I could refer to his younger bro as Mr. T aka Mr. Toaster
Bad joke I know! Sorry. Seriously - you've got a good 'un there and quite frankly you deserve it and he's lucky. Can't speak for him only for you - I know you. Love as always ....

Hee hee.. lovin the Mr T pun (makes me think of the A Team.. lol)

Hi hun,its so good to see you are back to your usual upbeat self, i was quite worried about you the other day ! i hope my phone call helped & obviously seeing Mr K again reafirmed all the good things in your relationship. I am so glad about that cos just how you write about him makes me think this is such a good thing for you, but then when i saw you face to face talking about him, you just glowed & your face could lite a dark night. xx

Aww, you'll make me blush.. lol.. he does make me smile though.. and lol, yes, your call did help me, thank you - sorry for blubbin!:cry:

Bloody hell Jenni - between you and Roch's diaries I've just sat on my butt catching up on 6days worth of news!! ....... and I've only read your 2 diaries ... so got all the others to go yet!!
Congrats on the 7lb loss, great you had such a good time in Pompey, pleased to hear about Mr K and you being ok .... oh and good luck for interview on tuesday - now must dash, have all those other diaries to catch up on!

Hee hee hee... sorry 'bout that flirty.. but I promise to try to keep up to date.. lol.. honest injun! I've got to try and get up to speed on everyone else's live now (been way too self-absorbed this week!!). Hope your week's been a good un!

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Friday Feb 2nd continued...

Friday Feb 2nd.. the afternoon...

Work wasn't fab.. Fridays are always a bit manic. Loads of interruptions.. and boss came in and showed me my new contract (which I had typed up for him yesterday) and told me that I will no longer be paid for overtime!! So.. that kind of sealed my fate.. my decision to job hunt was affirmed.. and I don't feel quite so bad about next weeks interview. I told him about one of the jobs I have applied for and he wanted to know what hours would I be doing.. etc etc.. I haven't the foggiest! lol It just said 2 or 2.5 days per week.. well anyway.. I'm going to raise a few questions about the overtime thing - I know the reasons.. but to change my working conditions after 3 years is a bit rich!

On top of that.. lol.. I had someone call in to collect some printing I had done, but they arrived very late and so, when I got home I was late , Zoe had an appt at the opticians, I got a call from someone I've applied to work for and basically they interviewed me over the phone and then asked me to send a handwritten letter and my CV to them. By the time I came off the line we were already late and had to drive to Wellingborough!

Had to drop Zoes boyfriend home first, then off to Welly and Specsavers.. I told Zoe to root around in my bag for the receipt.. which she did.. and told her to ring them - she was adamant - no number on the receipt.. I had her check it 3 times.. in the end I stopped the car and took the receipt.. the phone number was at the top!! I tried calling but for some reason O2 were playing silly wotsits and, although I got through, 3 times.. I couldn't get past their ridiculously long 'hello, this is xxxx, specsavers wellingbrough, how may I help you' before it dropped the call!

I finally got through long enough once we got to town.. as we rounded the last corner to the car park a complete muppet (no offence to muppets) pulled straight out in front of me.. well, in the frame of mind I was in.. I hit the brakes and the horn at the same time - he was in no doubt that I was, shall we say, somewhat peeved, at his lack of observation!

We parked and made a run (well, speedy walk) to SS(Specsavers).. I missed a call from Mr K but managed to ring back and, once Zoe was safely ensconced at SS I sat outside chatting on the phone to Mr K. Well.. his day hasn't been great either! AND.. it looks as if our date for next week may not happen as a direct result of events of today!! ARGH!! Still.. I am trying to be positive as it is not lost yet.. I should know by Monday.. :sigh: .. if this is a test of our relationship then we are gonna fly through it (although it is the ONLY time next week we can meet up ) still... we have loads of weeks on the future.. and that's how I have to look at it.. plus I KNOW he will be as disappointed as me.. he's lovely y'know (I might have mentioned that before - eh ?) lol

Paid my mortgage whilst in Welly and browsed through the Valentines cards.. ooh AND.. I saw the perfect present for him.. BUT.. at the moment.. I can't give it to him.. but I might get it and save it.. lol.. there were lots of silly things in one shop that I thought he would find hilarious.. but no way could he take them home! LOLOLOL

So.. spent nowt ('cept a wadge of my savings on the mortgage) and browsed loads.. got my new specs (they're giving me a headache so will take them off soon).. and Zoes new specs (they look lovely on her).. and she got her lenses sorted out. Then it was back home and I just cooked her and her fella the most scrummy smelling dinner!! Lamb steaks, mashed potatoes, brocolli, cauliflower, carrots and gravy. Looked divine!! They both really enjoyed it. I do miss food. LOL

My friend isn't coming over tonight so me and Zoe are gonna chill out together.. if nothing on the telly she fancies we might rent a dvd or I might even take her to the piccies.. I'm really tired and cold thought so the rental sounds far more appealling!

Glad this week is passed and that it's only 3 days to weigh in.. hopefully will have shifted a little bit more but after last week, I'll be more than happy if I manage a couple of pounds!

 

[Cheb]

Hi

Just been catching up with your 'goings on' Sounds like you had a great weekend, congrats on the fab weight loss.

 

[cazmaz_irl]

Hiya Jennie, just managed to catch up your thread this morning, wow so glad to hear ya had a great time in Portsmouth, slightly jealous :jelous: I didn't get to go....ah but as ya say yourself, not long till the Bermingham meet

Really happy for yourself and Mr K, its really good when theres a clearing of air, open communication is great, and it looks like you and Mr K have that side sorted, hope you get to see him this week, but again as you point out, theres many many weeks ahead, plus thank god for phones eh! we're never apart if we have our mobiles with us LOL

As for you boss, changing your working conditions after 3yrs,

Good luck in your job search hun, you deserve better, it will work out and your fabulous weight losses...your a credit to how to do the CD 100%...LOL...

 

[Karen1972]

Hi Jen

Glad things are back on track with Mr K. He does sound lovely!

You are such an active girl, you inspire me to do more with my free time!! Altho i'm sat here at 11.30am in my pj's watching emmerdale and catching up on minimins!

I want to see my nephews today and also visit my aunty who's just come out of hospital so i should make the effort to get dressed soon haha.

I'm sooooo lazy!

Luv,

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Hi Jen Glad things are back on track with Mr K. He does sound lovely! You are such an active girl, you inspire me to do more with my free time!.. I want to see my nephews today and also visit my aunty who's just come out of hospital...

LOL... firstly, Mr K is very lovely and as for filling free time - if I don't I will end up back as the lardy-ar$e couch potato feeding my face that helped get me to the size I used to be (and am!).. really glad things weren't as you feared with your aunty I've been hearing lots of good news about people who've thought there was one thing wrong with them, only to find it's nothing sinister good news indeed!!

...so glad to hear ya had a great time in Portsmouth, slightly jealous :jelous: I didn't get to go....ah but as ya say yourself, not long till the Bermingham meet Really happy for yourself and Mr K, its really good when theres a clearing of air, open communication is great, and it looks like you and Mr K have that side sorted, hope you get to see him this week, but again as you point out, theres many many weeks ahead, plus thank god for phones eh! we're never apart if we have our mobiles with us LOL
As for you boss, changing your working conditions after 3yrs, Good luck in your job search hun, you deserve better, it will work out and your fabulous weight losses...your a credit to how to do the CD 100%...LOL...

hee hee.. firstly, I'm gonna be the jealous one after the Dublin meet!! Birmingham is only a few short weeks away now! yeeharr!! lol I'm really glad that Mr K & I are able to be open about things with one another - it's vital for our relationship to survive and develop. I am rather smitten I must confess (no sarcastic comments please - ROFL).. and yes.. thank goodness for our mobiles!! As for change of working conditions.. I'm still not happy but you know what.. I'm going to see how the next 2 weeks pans out.. and then I will know what I am going to do. I really hope I get the job on Tuesday.. the more I think about it the more I want it! lol I've done the maths... and.. although things will be very tight.. the salary will JUST make it possible for me to stay in the house.. although I may still have to consider getting a lodger.. not relishing that idea much.. but needs must and all that.. next weigh in tomorrow so, fingers crossed for a couple of pounds.. can't second guess as every single loss has been different so far, so can't imagine why, at week 17 it should be any different! lol

Hi. Just been catching up with your 'goings on' Sounds like you had a great weekend, congrats on the fab weight loss.

Thanks Cheb, lovely to see you. I had a fab weekend.. and made lots of lovely new friends. Just wish we all lived a bit closer, but still.. there are fairly good road and rail links.. lol.. thanks for the congrats too (I am still chained to Mr Willpower - thanks for sharing him! )

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Weekend.. 3/4 Feb 07 Blast from the past, housework and facial hair!! lol

Saturday February 3rd 2007

No prizes for guessing how my Saturday began .. lol Yep - with a call from the lovely Mr K.. well, actually.. not strictly true.. lol.. I had already woken up.. gone to the loo (as you do ) and then decided , stuff it, I'm awake now - and Zoe had gone for her first morning at her new job (yippee, that means she will have her own money from now on!!!!! ).. and so.. I decided to just get stuck in to what I had to do!

As soon as she left I went into her room and gathered up all the washing.. tidied up generally (I never go in drawers or under the bed - never know what you might find!!! ) Rescued about a pub's worth of glasses! lol Made her bed (quick flick of the duvet basically, lol) and then launched into the bathroom! That done too, back in my room and got dressed .. THEN Mr K rang It was so good to hear his voice again - I know, I know,, it hadn't even been 24 hours.. but you know.. sometimes.. when all you have is phone calls.. you cherish them even more when you DO get them !

After his call I got on with the rest of the house.. washing dragged downstairs.. bins all emptied... beds made.. bathroom sparkling.. and it was time to do downstairs.. well, actually the stairs and landing first! So, brush in hand.. I did that.. then swept up (laminate floor in living room) and vaccuumed - flipping dog hairs!! I swear.. if they were longer I could weave a carpet of them! I have a dyson.. and I had to empty it 4 times just from the living room!!!! (all from the rug).. so.. that done I decided to tackle the hall and cloakroom too.. lol.. so, did that too! Next it was the kitchen.. to be honest.. wasn't looking forward to that very much, but did it nonetheless..and.. once that was all done, and by now , the third load of washing.. I washed the floors.. living room, kitchen/diner, cloakroom adn utility room! I was exhausted and it wasn't even 1pm! I collapsed in a heap in the armchair just as Zoe arrived home.. so I quickly made her sirloin steak with the leftover mash and carrots etc from Friday night and sat and watched tv with her. No idea what was on.. can't have been that important.. lol Oh yes.. it was some programme about saggy-skinned frogs which made me laugh.. lol (given all the discussions about excess skin of late!! ) hee hee

In the midst of all that I had another call from Mr K we tried to work out when we could talk next.. he gave me a time and I determined to make sure I was in and could hear the phone! (ie not vacuuming.. listening to loud music.. etc) lol

I carried on tidying and wiping down stuff.. I even did a bit of weeding and tidied up the back garden a little.. Not sure where this energy has come from!! Oh.. AND I hand washed our bras too! lol AND.. I made it to the post office in time to pick up a parcel that I wasn't expecting.. when I got home.. it was a scrummy fake fur hooded jacket.. it's silvery fur and lined in the most gorgeous lilac!! A very special lady had sent it to me as a surprise, as it was too big for her and as good as new and she just felt I would like it!!! I do!! It makes me look yetti-ish.. lol.. Zoe hates it.. I don't care lol, I LOVE it.. and will be wearing it this afternoon (Sunday)when (if) I take the dog out for a stroll around the lakes ...

So, all that done and I thought.. right.. MUST get on with some work.. by now it's almost 4pm and tiredness was beginning to hit home.. then I got a call!

A right "blast from the past", a friend of mine called R, a widower , who I haven't seen in almost 2 years! He said he would like to meet up so he could talk.. I knew this meant that something had happened and so I agreed! We arranged to meet in a pub car park at 7 (I hate walking into pubs alone).. I told him that I have changed since we last saw one another.. but not how or in what way.. tee hee.. I wanted that element of surprise! lol.. he said he looked forward to seeing me later. I got off the phone and thought.. crap! How do I let Mr K know what's happening - although I was hoping for his call in the early evening so I was sure it would be fine.

It was, he rang (Mr K) and we chatted away.. I told him about R calling but his (Mr Ks) phone kept cutting out.. nightmare! Every time I tried to tell him a bit about R his phone went dead.. lol.. he must have rung me back at least 3 or 4 times!)... in the end, he got the gist of it and said he would call me sometime tomorrow... He's already told me that he trusts me and that he has no worries about me and I think that's why (and also the fact that R is just a friend) that I didn't even think about whether or not to go and meet him.

Anyway.. I got ready and we met and it was brilliant. He hasn't changed much at all.. but boy was he surprised when he saw me.. LMAO I find the initial shock of others very amusing.. (bad aren't I) lol, it's all a bit odd really.. lololol Anyway., we met at his local but there was nowhere to sit, so went to another pub. It was packed but we managed to get seats..and then caught up on the last 2 years of news! SO much has happened for us both.. I was glad to be an ear for him. He's a smashing chap. I was sorry, but not surprised, to hear that his relationship had ended (his choice) and that he was seriously considering selling up and going out to live in Spain near his sister. I talked with him about the pros and cons.. and the emotional issues (ie leaving his late wife's grave).. we talked for ages!

We ended up back in his local chatting away until closing time, that was funny as he has been a regular there for over 30 years.. lol.. and I know we got some odd looks.. when I mentioned that he said that when he next goes in they will be asking him "who was that attractive young woman you were with last night then??" LMAO.. made me roar with laughter.. lol (I'm 43 and he's 51). I can imagine that when he goes in next they will all be at him.. lolololol Any how - then I dropped him home. He invited me in so we went inside (its a lovely house - first time I'd been there as he had bought it about 18 months ago..). It was beautifully "dressed", his girlfriend (well, ex now I guess) has superb taste.. very very tasteful for the main part.. I felt sad for her.. I knew she would be hurting.. and this was a very nice home to have moved out of and back to her own house.

We talked even more about her and about his late wife.. and came to the same conclusion.. He hadn't given himself time to grieve properly after his wife had died.. and now.. he was better able to (emotionally) but also had the benefit of just over 2 years having passed too. And, who knows.. when he has grieved maybe he and his girlfriend might get together again - although I don't think so - he had told me before about the volatility of their relationship. Shame really as I think they really loved one another.....

We talked about his life for about 90% of the time and the rest about me.. I went on and on at great length about Mr K.. lol.. he did what all my friends have done really, warned me that as Mr K was still (legally) married, that I had to be careful.. I reassured him, an, in the process found meself self-reassuring too How cool is that!!! lol

It got to about 2am and my bladder having had to be emptied 4 times already and my eyes starting to sting, I said that I had really got to get home.... it was really odd at the start of the evening.. so much water under the bridge since last I saw him.. but by the end of the evening it was like the last 2 years had passed in a flash. I was glad that he called, and that, at the end of the evening.. he seemed a lot happier. 2 years ago he was a man filled with sorrow (understandably) and sadness. He has changed too.. the sadness remains (not all the time) but the sorrow has passed.. which is good. He talked loads and loads about his late wife.. and I didn't try to stop him.. he clearly needed a sounding board, and, thankfully, I am in a strong enough emotional state to offer myself as such for him!

I was shattered when I got in.. and chuckled as I thought about how my evening was supposed to have been - shower, curl up on sofa, watch telly then early night!! lolol

It was damned cold though when I came home - car temp said minus 3!! Got in to find the kitchen in a bit of a mess again - wasn't best pleased, but spotted the giveway trainers in the hall and so, spent 10 mins clearing up and then off to bed. I was glad to get home to my leccy blanky!!

Sunday 4th February 2007

Ohh what a beautiful morning!! Mr K rang and it was bliss to wake to his voice.. although I admit , I didn't open my eyes for ages!! lololol He was brief and said he would call back later.. so I went back to sleep!! lololol When he called back it really was time to get up! lol He wanted to hear all about my evening so I told him.. I said that I did think perhaps I should have asked him if he minded my going out to meet R.. he told me off! lololol (nicely though ) and said not to be daft.. that he trusts me.. and that I don't need his permission to do anything!! lol I felt a bit silly, but also, didn't want him to think I would do anything out of order with anyone else and that had he not been happy about it I might not have gone. Still, thankfully, he is a darling and said he had no problem at all with it. I was glad as R is a nice man who needs a friendly ear at times (lol each 2 years it looks!)..

So.. phone call finished, and plans (as best we can) made to catch up with one another again later in the day and I finally got up!! I had just enough time to get ready and dash off to church (not been in weeks - what with all these weekends away!! etc.. ) and it was lovely.. I am really fortunate to go to a church with such a loving congregation (although we call them our church family coz that's what they are!).. lots of hugs.. and one lady in particular (who has always been super-critical of my size) told me off for still wearing my big black coat.. lol.. it's a size 26 or 28 I think, and yes,, admittedly it is way too big.. but I love it and it is my best (well, only - until yesterday) winter coat! So, her name is Mary, so, Mary said she would alter it for me!!! I know she is an amazing seamstress so I thanked her!! I asked how long it would take her, she made me turn around while she pulled it in here and there and said - oh a day tops! lol So, I took it off and gave it to her!!! I'm picking it up at 7pm tomorrow!! How amazing is that!!

I ran to the car (yes, ran!! - I don't DO freezing without a coat!!) lol and realised I had an old thick jacket on the back seat and put that on! It's not very flattering but its warm. Headed off to the Co-op and stocked up on essentials (nearly had a panic attack this morning when I got home to find only 1 partial loo roll left in the entire house!!! ).. lol so.. trolley with bread, cheese, small bag of cadburys mini creme eggs (essentials for Zoe ) etc and bumped into a few people I know.. lol.. I'm such a natterer!! lol.. it was almost 1.30 by the time I got home.. lol.. and I had my first pack of the ady - spicy tomato soup.. yummmmmmy..

Zoe and her fella were up and the kitchen looked like a bomb site, house full of smoke.. lol - I didn't need to say a word .. just my face said it all and Zoe promised that as soon as they had finished eating she would clear up!

I told her about my shopping and she asked how R had been (she remembers him) and I told her.. I said I was going to spend the afternoon working on Music Festival stuff shut in the study - and here I am!! lol NOT doing that but making sure my diary is up to date (for a change) and trying desperately to catch up with everyone else's too - and failing miserably! lol

So.. I have to go and get this programme designed and, hopefully, if I can get this printer to work, get some drafts printed out ready for my 7pm meeting with the guys!! (after which, of course, it is pub quiz time!!) Not really in the mood for that as I'm tired AND I want to make sure I get some decent sleep in by Tuesday for my job interview!!

Oh.. and I have a spot on my chin!!! lol Not horrendous news I know.. but I never get spots and here I have another one!! So.. hoping that vanishes by Tuesday!!

Quick question though.. has anyone else noticed an increase in facial hair since starting the diet .. I only ask as I noticed some very very fine, fair, um.. hairs on my chin!! I was a bit shocked and not entirely sure what to do with them!! lol Not plucking (there aren't that many but they are white so I don't want to pluck them and find I grow a feckin goatee!!!! ) so am wondering whether I just leave em and that they have always been there just unnoticed - or do I get them removed in some way? I'm not used to this kind of thing..

and finally (in true "That's Life" style.. ... lol.. I have my weigh in tomorrow!! so.. fingers crossed and bladder empty.. I should get a step closer to losing 6 stone!! (3.4lbs will do it.. so hopefully by next week!)