Chunky Dunking, taking the plunge and losing the flab!

[Llamasoks]

I'm sure he does, are things that bad? :/

It might well be the Chinese. I know if I'm having a run of being good then eat something naughty it can give me a dodgy stomach almost like it's punishing me for slipping and allowing myself to have something nice xx

Pretty much at the mo yeah. His brother's girlfriend has just broken up with him and moved out for the exact same reason and he's still not making any effort. I asked him to do one thing yesterday and he forgot, and then blames me for not reminding him. I'm just sick of feeling like a nagging parent and he says he's sick of being treated like a child. I don't trust him to do anything or get anything done, he was talking about kids the other day and I was like..."You're kidding right? I wouldn't leave you alone in charge of a hamster!" it's harsh, but totally true, the idea of leaving him with any kind of responsibility is terrifying!
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

It's so frustrating when they don't see how they are! I want to shake Dai at least once a day for something similar so I get where you're coming from. They have their good points but jeez they know how to be idiots too. If you had a baby you'd essentially have two kids to look after and an overgrown baby is bad enough xx

 

[Llamasoks]

It's so frustrating when they don't see how they are! I want to shake Dai at least once a day for something similar so I get where you're coming from. They have their good points but jeez they know how to be idiots too. If you had a baby you'd essentially have two kids to look after and an overgrown baby is bad enough xx

I was worried that there was genuinely something wrong with his hearing, so he got it tested (meaning I forced him), I asked him to go to the doctor about his memory, but he forgot! His good points are dwindling fast! I love him, don't get me wrong but I've gotta tell him I'm not prepared to stay in a relationship where I don't want to move forward, I can't imagine marrying him anymore, because I can't handle being like this for the next 60 years of my life, I don't want kids with him whilst things are like they are now and they show no signs of changing anytime soon so if it doesn't change I've got my answer already really haven't I?
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

I don't know about you but the worst bit for me is the lack of wanting to make things better on his part. If they love you they'll do things differently is how I see it. You're not asking him to be a different person just to make the effort to be a grown up. Is he the same age as you? xx

 

[Llamasoks]

I don't know about you but the worst bit for me is the lack of wanting to make things better on his part. If they love you they'll do things differently is how I see it. You're not asking him to be a different person just to make the effort to be a grown up. Is he the same age as you? xx

That is it I think, how can you not want to make an effort when you see how much you're upsetting someone?. He is yeah, I used to date only older guys, but he's 9 days younger (only 9 days mind) and the difference is huge!
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

9 days is nowt. Dai is 4 years older than me and he acts like a 12yr old most of the time. When you know you're upsetting someone you care about you do something to stop them being upset. It's not hard to do especially in his case when all it means is popping a reminder in his phone to get things done and be a grown up. He might actually find he likes being responsible for himself xx

 

[Llamasoks]

9 days is nowt. Dai is 4 years older than me and he acts like a 12yr old most of the time. When you know you're upsetting someone you care about you do something to stop them being upset. It's not hard to do especially in his case when all it means is popping a reminder in his phone to get things done and be a grown up. He might actually find he likes being responsible for himself xx

I set reminders on his phone last year, he ignored them I texted him earlier and he hasn't even bothered to reply, think he's too busy at his precious job.
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

I'm out of suggestions then my lovely he needs to wake up and realise what he's going to lose before it's too late xx

 

[pixie-gem]

Oh my I've missed a lot!
Sorry boy is being a dick sweetie, they certainly have that tendency!
I've learnt boys don't take hints, or get subtlety or anything like that. Have you sat him down and spoken to him like a child? Plain, simple, clear is about all they understand unfortunately xxx


Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins.com

 

[Llamasoks]

I've sat him down and talked, I've yelled, I've cried, I've made him lists, stuck reminders on the fridge, on his phone - nothing works.
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

Punching him isn't an option is it? He has to want to make an effort and if he doesn't he's a very silly boy! xx

 

[Llamasoks]

Punching him isn't an option is it? He has to want to make an effort and if he doesn't he's a very silly boy! xx

Unfortunately not!
XxX

 

[jenniecakes]

I was worried that there was genuinely something wrong with his hearing, so he got it tested (meaning I forced him), I asked him to go to the doctor about his memory, but he forgot! His good points are dwindling fast! I love him, don't get me wrong but I've gotta tell him I'm not prepared to stay in a relationship where I don't want to move forward, I can't imagine marrying him anymore, because I can't handle being like this for the next 60 years of my life, I don't want kids with him whilst things are like they are now and they show no signs of changing anytime soon so if it doesn't change I've got my answer already really haven't I?
XxX

Just been catching up on your diary, hope you're ok, you sound very stressed out with your relationship at the moment. Maybe you need some time out and spend some time on yourself. I moved in with my fella in February, and he has never lived on his own before, where as I've lived away from my parents for 5 + years... I constantly have to give him lists of things to do, generally I text them to him so that there isn't an excuse for him to forget, and he does understand when I go crazy because things haven't been done.

I hate the fact as well, that when I ask him to do something, I mean do it now, as if i wanted you to do it later, I'd ask you later! Ha. But, I spoke to my mum about it and it's definitely a man thing. I've been on a couple of courses and holidays and left him fending for himself and he does realise how much i do for him, but he still doesn't just do it... I have to ask first.

I definitely give yourself a break from it all though, stay with a friend for a day or two? x hugs x

 

[Llamasoks]

Just been catching up on your diary, hope you're ok, you sound very stressed out with your relationship at the moment. Maybe you need some time out and spend some time on yourself. I moved in with my fella in February, and he has never lived on his own before, where as I've lived away from my parents for 5 + years... I constantly have to give him lists of things to do, generally I text them to him so that there isn't an excuse for him to forget, and he does understand when I go crazy because things haven't been done.

I hate the fact as well, that when I ask him to do something, I mean do it now, as if i wanted you to do it later, I'd ask you later! Ha. But, I spoke to my mum about it and it's definitely a man thing. I've been on a couple of courses and holidays and left him fending for himself and he does realise how much i do for him, but he still doesn't just do it... I have to ask first.

I definitely give yourself a break from it all though, stay with a friend for a day or two? x hugs x

Hi Jen, I'm alright, just a bit bogged down with it all, sure we all get it at times!

It must definitely be a man thing, he definitely understands why I'm angry, I don't get why that's not enough to put an effort in, but hey ho!

I'd be so worried if I went on a course or hol without him, not sure the house would survive, I'm thinking fire, explosions etc! I've never known anyone so forgetful!

Hope your CC is going well!
XxX

 

[jenniecakes]

Hi Jen, I'm alright, just a bit bogged down with it all, sure we all get it at times!

It must definitely be a man thing, he definitely understands why I'm angry, I don't get why that's not enough to put an effort in, but hey ho!

I'd be so worried if I went on a course or hol without him, not sure the house would survive, I'm thinking fire, explosions etc! I've never known anyone so forgetful!

Hope your CC is going well!
XxX

He'll come round to your way of thinking, I think to them it means getting old and growing up, which is of course what we want, it just takes them longer to get to that stage. Just keep nagging!!

CC is going really well, I'm re-introducing an element of slimming world back in this week, just to keep me to stick to healthy foods. And after a horrendous hangover at weekend... I'm steering clear of wine for a little while again which will definitely help me out.

 

[scarlet79]

Afternoon my lovely how's the sickness today? xx

 

[Llamasoks]

Afternoon my lovely how's the sickness today? xx

Better thanks! Need my mojo back though!
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

I swear it's the weather. The darker the evenings get and the colder the weather that more I want to eat junk so if it's any consolation honey I'm with you xx

 

[Llamasoks]

I swear it's the weather. The darker the evenings get and the colder the weather that more I want to eat junk so if it's any consolation honey I'm with you xx

I've gotten into a vicious cycle now with rubbish food making me feel ill and then feeling ill so wanting rubbish food! I've resolved to start 100% tomorrow, get in all my exercise (Including 2X30DS on Halloween I might add!) before the wedding, my protein shakes have arrived, my food list is done, my exercise is planned, I just need to wake up on time and do something or I get thrown into sleepy all day mode!
XxX

 

[scarlet79]

Set two different alarms and put one across the other side of the room you have to get up to turn it off then. You know what you've got to do so that's half the battle now it's just putting it into action xx