doing fab mrs....enjoy your treats
Thanks Hun
Well today was a crazy day. Hubby let me have a lay in this morning which was bliss so was nearly afternoon before i got up
lol. We had to go to lakeside (a huge shopping center near us) as we needed to get my wedding band replated. But disapointed tbh brought a white golf gorgeous band to match my engagement ring and it needs replating already and ive only worn it for 6 months :S its about 45 mins away so by the time we got out and there it was already 2 so we popped into wimpy for lunch which was within points and amazing!!
We took the ring in and i then decided as i have gone down a dress size that as im going out for a friends leaving do on the 23rd that i needed some new flats (i cant do heels
) and maybe something to wear as we had some vouchers. Long and short of it is in over 100 shops.....NOTHING!! Que big emotional break down in the middle of Costa
i just hate being like this i just want to be "normal" i can never find anything i like and if i find something i like its to small and if something fits i hate it, I dont have the luxury of going into new look and picking a size 12 of the rail and walking out hassle free
theve even taken the large section out of 3 of the shops i went in so walked staight in and straight out
im just sick of it and i broke down big time hubby didnt know what to do bless him and my ds just cuddled me and looked at me in horror. I think the worst thing about it is that any "normal" person would have had that experience (as we all know not all shopping trips are sucessful) got home and got straight on the phone to a mate and would have asked to borrow something, could i do that....not unless i wanna borrow two dresses of my friends one for each leg. i just wanna be like everyone else and i watch everyone around me eating the foods they love and buying the clothes at a cheap price that they want. Me i have to cut down all the foods i love and have some where i can i excerise when my treadmill isnt being a complete nightmare and breaking down on me and i still seem to be getting no where fast!
Ive just come to the realisation that i hate my life the way it is and have been trying to change it for over 5 years and im still trying and getting nowhere fast
i just find it really dishearting. Also to top that all off the treadmill came back tonight and although all fixed it dosnt work properly and stops when you stand on it, it needs something to helps the belt glide so thats gonna be another week that im without it. to make matters even worse my friend turnt up with it at 7.30 tonight and didnt leave till 9 meaning by the time i sat down for dinner it was 10 o clock i was starving and ate the quickest thing possible to cook a fry up all within points but not the best thing 12 hours before WI!! Im dreading the scales tomorrow loss or not, cause with another week without a tready sooner or later its gonna catch up with me and it will be the week im going out for my friends leaving do and i can see a huge gain heading my way again and there i am back to step one. I know with diets there is no quick fix and i know this is a lifestyle change but i suppose really im angry. Angry with myself for getting like this and being so unhappy and it goes so deep its taking hold of my life.
i just simply wanna be normal
Anyway that was a huge rant and im really sorry for anyone that had to read it i just had to let it out somewhere!
gonna do my menu today and go before i rant somemore
(L)
Wimpy
Chicken chunks and chips - 11.5
(D)
Bacon x4 - 2
Egg - 1.5
Bread and lfs - 2
mushrooms and tomato - 0
mini roastie hash browns - 4.5
ketchup - 0.5
(S)
Monster munch - 1.5
mini fruit corner - 2
Total 25/26
I added 1 point to the saved pot and i still had 10 left over from yesterday.
Really wish i had used them wanted some treat but ate so late i couldnt eat another thing.
Hopefully they will work in my favour as i out for a meal on tuesday eve and was gonna have the eve off points as i have no ideas what the points are so fingers crossed it will counter things out! Fingers crossed for WI tomorrow :S xx