does this sound silly? what's it like to be thin

[California girl]

its weird isnt it? i have read before when people have lost a lot of weight it takes a while for their 'self perception' to catch up so you still think you are fat when u are not. my weight definately affects my personality, I got into a 12/14 wedding dress last summer and felt fantastic. i was not skinny by any means and some photos i censored due to my back/arms chin looking a bit too flabby but the spray tan and corset worked a treat and the majority of the pics im proud of!! and have felt pretty good about my weight since however decided to go back on the w8 plan this month after a few pounds gain since christmas. When i weighed in i was 4lbs lighter than on my wedding day but i still wanted to get a bit off. i got my friend to take a pic in my swimsuit (very brave i thought - and will be posted if i get to goal!!) and god i looked hideous all my positive feeling about my weight fell away and again i feel huge. I hope that If i get this last 23 lb off too get to goal i will eventually feel slim but I dont know if its possible after all these years of negative thoughts. On the positive now I am a w8 consultant i get a great satisfaction when my clients lose wight and get a kick out of their success!!

 

[funkykat]

thanks for the replies everyone,
i do see what you're saying about what is 'thin' rainbow and i have got down to a size 12/14 before and still thought i was fat. i would just like to be happy with my curves (or lack of them) and not have to hide from having my photo taken, or only dressing in frumpy clothes. i want to feel i can get undressed in front of my boyfriend and feel sexy rather than always wanting the lights out. why should he think i'm sexy when i can't! don't get me wrong there are bits of me that i like, but the tummy has to go!

i'm just a little nervous that if the weight has gone and i feel down that i won't have a reason anymore. i'm usually a fairly happy person but everyone has their down days and whenever i have mine i tend to fall back to the fact i'm overweight. part of me really wants to be thin but there's a small bit of me that just doesn't want to let go. anyway, food for thought - now off to make my healthy red dinner and be happy :>)