Don't you just hate it when....
- Thread starter Shirleen
- Start date
Happy Holidays
Gold Member
Awwww don't feel like you're a bad mum, being a mum is the hardest job in the world, I keep telling my daughter you never know the decisions you make whether they are right or wrong, there are no text books to tell you what to do in each given situation.
My son was really difficult to get to sleep at night & he kept waking up, I decided to try & put a stop to it, (I did lots of things which just kept him doing what he did) so I put him in his cot at night, did the reading book thing, then left him, I checked on him every 15mins, but he cried for about 1.5hrs the first night, & second, by the fourth night he'd stopped crying, but at night I just gave him water to drink & did exactly what you did, left him to cry, I closed all the doors & just kept checking on him every 15mins.
Do what you think is right.
donna88
Gold Member
How old is she?
I'm sure your not a bad mum, being a mum is the hardest job in the world and we can only do our best. I actually didn't think I'd manage when I first had my son, I was in the hospital for 3 days after having him and while we were there he would not stop crying unless I was holding or at the very least holding his hand, but he got better when we got home. When it got to getting him into a bedroom routine I used to just leave him in his cot crying and I hated it, but after a couple of nights it paid off, he's now 4 (5 in July) and he has always been in a very good routine and I very rarely have problems getting him to bed and to sleep. Just stick at it and do what you think is best, at the end of the day your her mum and onlyy want what's best for her xx
She's about 8.5 months. Shes been ok until recently but it's been getting worse lately, all I have to do is put her down sometimes and she starts. Hubby is doing his best but he's got work and is up at 4.45. I tried leaving her to cry but she screams until shes sick. Shes crawling and pulling up now so there's no hope of her just lying there and going to sleep because she keeps herself awake with moving around. Shes never napped well and very rarely in her cot so I can't get anything done in the day either. I'm desperate for a shower but if I leave her she'll scream the entire time. I have no idea what is best any more and honestly I spend half the time wishing she'd go away and yhen feeling awful because its not her fault x
donna88
Gold Member
If you need to get something done, such as a shower make sure she's fed, changed and comfortable and leave her to cry while you shower (rush your shower if you want) but have it, I know it sounds harsh and I understand its really hard, especially if she's screaming so much she's making herself sick, but a shower won't take that long and she needs to learn that as long as she's comfortable sometimes mummy has to do things.
Sorry if I sound patronising as I really don't mean to, I just know where your coming from as I've been through it as well... so don't worry your really not alone. Try not to feel guilty either, although the thoughts of wanting her to go away aren't nice, we all have had them at some point about our children and its actually very brave of you to admit it. *hugs* hope she settles down soon and starts letting you get on with things. I'll be honest that time in the hospital I actually felt like I was going mad, I kept getting that sunshine and lolly pops song in my head and it just made me break down in tears constantly as I knew I was suppose to be happy but didn't feel it and honestly didn't think I would cope at all, I loved him straight away but I just wanted him to stop and was torn between wanting to just get home because I hated the hospital and panicking that I couldn't cope on my own. I still love my little man to pieces and I wouldn't change him for the world, he still winds me up at times and sometimes I still think ''agghhh just shut up'' but I promise you it does get better (although I've been promised it then gets worse as they get into the teen years but lets forget that for now) xx
Jess<3
Journey to 10 stone loss
hope your ok, im feeling like this atm! All my 19month old has done is scream an cry all morning!! cant do anything as wont let me leave him. Kicking off because he wants a fruit shoot but im not letting him as already had one. Feel like pulling my hair out!! But its all part of been a mum. Like donna88 said, go have a shower just make sure your daughter fed, clean an comfy then theres no reason for her to cry (as in hungry etc) start putting things in place now before it gets even worse as shes older. xxxx
Thanks 
she had a long sleep just after I posted that (on me but at least she was sleeping) and since she woke up shes been happier so I shut the stair gate and let her roam the landing and bathroom while I showered and dried my hair. Feel alot better now. Dreading tonight's bedtime battle though x
she had a long sleep just after I posted that (on me but at least she was sleeping) and since she woke up shes been happier so I shut the stair gate and let her roam the landing and bathroom while I showered and dried my hair. Feel alot better now. Dreading tonight's bedtime battle though x
Jess<3
Journey to 10 stone loss
dyjhiw your feeling so.. ARGH!! Jacob is in the worst mood ever an having a tantrum at every little thing.
because feeling so grrr i cannot be bothered to stick to diet & really fancy two slices toasted white bread lots butter & lemon curd.. & 'real' pancakes tonight!!
edit: ohh an justgot excited as parcel came & it looked like my new actifry... turned out to be hubbys bloody fish pump for tank (valentines pressy he wanted!!! lol)
because feeling so grrr i cannot be bothered to stick to diet & really fancy two slices toasted white bread lots butter & lemon curd.. & 'real' pancakes tonight!!
edit: ohh an justgot excited as parcel came & it looked like my new actifry... turned out to be hubbys bloody fish pump for tank (valentines pressy he wanted!!! lol)
Happy Holidays
Gold Member
I couldn't have put it better myself. Also there are a lot of mums on here & when you're in the situation you feel like it's you & your fault, your to blame, but honestly wise words are above.
Your daughter could be making herself sick because she knows this works & will get your attention. I'll pm you an experience my daughter had with her step son, don't want to put details on here for obvious reasons.
Texty_F
Gold Member
DYJHIW - 1. You have gone way over your syns today by eating STUPID processed curry sauce from a Jar
2. You get your online Gas and Electric bill and they tell you they are DOUBLING your payments to £180 a month ffs do they think im powering the national grid
3. You tell OH about the bill and he takes it out on you saying well how the hell is it that high blah blah, were not in all day how can we use that much, YOU "meaning me" will have to turn the thermostat down and make sure lights are off etc
WHY ME!!! does he not live here too??? Sorry for the rant im annoyed lol can you tell
2. You get your online Gas and Electric bill and they tell you they are DOUBLING your payments to £180 a month ffs do they think im powering the national grid
3. You tell OH about the bill and he takes it out on you saying well how the hell is it that high blah blah, were not in all day how can we use that much, YOU "meaning me" will have to turn the thermostat down and make sure lights are off etc
WHY ME!!! does he not live here too??? Sorry for the rant im annoyed lol can you tell
Pinknails2012
Gold Member
Dyjhiw you feel all your food eating is pointless because of the portion size, I'm sure its just me i never had a portion size i just put it all on my plate and eat it all, then i got better, now my portions seem to be getting big again and i cant stop myself, anyone got any tips as to how to control it?
Pinknails2012
Gold Member
Yeah i use my bowl at work then i know how much to fill it and its a good filling amount but when im at home i just dont think, i should just stick to bowls all the time, thanks
Texty_F
Gold Member
Are you just cooking for yourself hun? Try halving the ingredients and not cooking as much - There are 3 of us at home now - I rarely eat mashed potato now but when I cook and make it I still make enough for the 5 of us that used to live here, Its a habit I find hard to break I always worry ive not made enough, I think its a case of re educating the brain
Pinknails2012
Gold Member
My bf eats Huge portions, So i guess ive caught the habit slightly and make too much of things, defo need to take a look and think am i really that hungry and will i need that much, im gonna take pics aswell to try upkeep it, i too do too much of things as my brain thinks its better to have more, than not enough, besides I like feeding up my man hehe
Texty_F
Gold Member
Haha my hubby and son are both 6'5 and big eaters, I still make huge portions for them, Ive just learned to put less on my plate. I stop when im full rather than when im stuffed.
You could try keeping a diary and pics on here? Its what I do now and It makes me feel accountable to everyone on minis for what im eating lol I know that sounds silly but it works (well 99% of the time) anyway.
You could try keeping a diary and pics on here? Its what I do now and It makes me feel accountable to everyone on minis for what im eating lol I know that sounds silly but it works (well 99% of the time) anyway.
