Learning to eat...

[Jazzyj]

Thanks Mini & Libbie,
Wow Libbie 108 lost!!! That is fab!
Well I nearly didn't go as I started an evil period and felt awful. I had to force myself out of the door!
Well I lost another 1.5 so that is a grand total of 3! Not quite the whoosh of CD but hey chipping away! I suppose also it isn't bad given I tend not lose on a period week! Wish I didn't need to go to work today I feel like snuggling up with a hot water bottle and watching cr@p films hey ho!

 

[Jazzyj]

28th September

Just thought it is a year since i started Lighter Life! Still nearly 30lbs lighter! So proof it doesn't have to all get piled on plus more! But proof that it is a life time commitment to keep fit and healthy! The important bit to realise is that the latter is a fact and we shouldn't view it as a punishment but part of our lifestyles! xxxx

 

[chicken on a mission]

Just thought it is a year since i started Lighter Life! Still nearly 30lbs lighter! So proof it doesn't have to all get piled on plus more! But proof that it is a life time commitment to keep fit and healthy! The important bit to realise is that the latter is a fact and we shouldn't view it as a punishment but part of our lifestyles! xxxx

Now there's a post worth reading

 

[KD]

The important bit to realise is that the latter is a fact and we shouldn't view it as a punishment but part of our lifestyles! xxxx

Now there's a post worth reading

Well yes. I love these little sayings. I'm really good at telling them...not quite so good at taking them onboard myself though

 

[Mini]

Just thought it is a year since i started Lighter Life! Still nearly 30lbs lighter! So proof it doesn't have to all get piled on plus more! But proof that it is a life time commitment to keep fit and healthy! The important bit to realise is that the latter is a fact and we shouldn't view it as a punishment but part of our lifestyles! xxxx

Hi Jazzy,

Well said Jazzy and this is how I feel now about the whole thing and I think it does make a differece mentally whatever about the figure.

You have done well to keep your 30lbs. off and that is something to be proud of indeed!

Love Mini xxx

 

[Jazzyj]

Look at you 2!!!!!! Both at goal!!!!
Well done to you Chicken and KD!
I've never allowed myself to get to goal yet. I say it in that way as I now believe that for some reason that is how it is. Part of my head doesn't want it just yet. I think that is partly why I decided on going to WW so that I could slow things down a bit.
I have a fairly messed up head most of the time and although things are getting much better, I still have a lot of issues to reconcile. Things like all the things I put off to do until I was slim. Some of them I clearly didn't, don't an won't want to do. Until I can accept that I don't think I'll get to goal.
Don't get me wrong i mean this in a positive way...as realising this is a big step forward for me.

You don't fail until you give up trying!

 

[Jazzyj]

29th September ARGHHHH!!!!!

Have got totaly fed up with the men in my house not sharing in the jobs. Found myself having a go at all of them. OH told me to stop shouting at everuyone and get out.
I got my handbag and got in the car. Discovered I'd no where to go! I drove to the sea front and sat there for 2 hours. Drive back and no one had missed me! They thought I was upstairs

They've all no gone out and left me with all the washing and ironing to do! OH said oh leave that and come to the gym with me! All well and good but that would involve me doing my workout then waiting for him and chatting to his squash mates whilst drinking pints of soda water so I can drive him home. He gives the impression that it is our quality time, ballcox! Every Friday that is the routine! Yes when I'm not in a bad mood I quite enjoy it, however if they had all helped a bit before going out I wouldn't be coming back to do it all 2morrow!

In November for the first time ever I'm going away overnight without kids or husband. I'm meeting up with some old student friends.
As soon as it was arranged OH arranged a lads weekend out as (thought you wouldn't mind as you are going away for a night) Difference is I will have to organise all childcare/food etc for his and mine as it won't occur to him to check if I am working or what the kids have planned! All that just falls into place. My going away for one night will also mean that I won't drink as i have to drive back and make sure that everything is ready for the monday morning. No one else will have done it. Now I could just not do it so that they can learn, however who is the one who gets judged when DS the younger goes to school in dirty uniform and no lunch? Bet your bottom dollar it won't be the Dad!
Mmm think I might just put Thelma & Louise on whilst doing the ironing! May even put on a head-scarf and sunglasses to complete the look!

 

[westhills]

I have found that as I lost weight I put up with less and less crap from OH, and now I don't put up with any at all.
Come to the WeMitt meet in November as well (25th/26th Nov) - that'll show them you mean business!
Ann x

 

[Jazzyj]

OMG Westhills!
Not long after starting Lighter Life I discovered my cyber pals on Discovery Health. Chutney Spiers was organising a boot camp. I looked at the info and it it was not too far away in the New Forrest. Due to LL all I needed to pay for was accomodation. No booze no food! Now make the comparison with all the football trips and stag weekends ove the last 20 years! So I said I was thinking of going on the weekend - well you would have thought I had said I was selling the house for us all to live in a tent on Southsea Common! After a row he said "oh go then, don't let me stop you!" I wish I'd have said ok then, but I felt guilty for wasting money on me and also I'd have to organise the kids as he works saturday night (a saturday night which can be moved when he wants to!!!!) Oooh best I go and cook some veg chilli and chill out!
Inside there is a very independent woman chipping her way out! I think I smother her in food in case she scares me too much or makes a decision that I don't want to make maybe!?!? Funny how a mad mind works

 

[Jazzyj]

Well usual routine is, on the way home from the gym we get a kebab. I've always been good with a small chicken kebab no dressing. Back home for 10:30ish so DS younger ok.
So it got to 12:15 and I suspected a tad of a rebellion gong on with OH. So txtd him with a comment about most polite husbands would have said they would be late!
Then as a malicious after txt I sent
"didn't want a f@kin kebab nway"
Oddly enough 1 minute later he then appeared through the door on his mobile ordering a kebab which I had told him I didn't want! He then said he thought it was tongue in cheek!
He then fell asleep till the delivery bloke arrived
I was in the midst of watching a film so stuck my finger in one ear whilst he chomped (why do they do that??) He then announced that he was full and was going to bed was I coming - wink wink!?????
OMG the chat up lines just keep coming!
No was the reply I was going to put on Bill Bailey to cheer me up!
DS the elder came in telling me about how the pub he was underage ~(16)~drinking in got a lock in and how he had missed a talk by some football hooligan mafia man in another pub. I cracked ....I gave full vent to my opinion of Danny Dyer glorifying idiots to lads like him. How most of the football hoolies that are on these numpty documentaries are dangerous racist bigots and then I looked in his eyes and I sensed he thought I was going "blah blah blah"
BUT turning point
1) I didn't eat the kebab that was ordered for me, cos it was there anyway
2) I didn't go to bed as instructed (ooooh rebell-yell)
3) My DS the elder was put in his place, by me, albeit till the next time.
Ms Jazzyj Assertive signing off

 

[Mini]

1) I didn't eat the kebab that was ordered for me, cos it was there anyway
2) I didn't go to bed as instructed (ooooh rebell-yell)
3) My DS the elder was put in his place, by me, albeit till the next time.
Ms Jazzyj Assertive signing off

Hi Jazzy,

Sounds good to me!

Did you see the thread on kebabs?


I would not eat one after what I read on it

Night! Night.

Better day tomorrow!

Love Mini xxx

 

[Jazzyj]

30th September

Well another day chez Jazzy!
Made up with OH, thought don't think things will change re the help around the house!
Sudden realization that it is OHs big 40 this week and our suprise family weekend to Centre Parks! Need to get organised and get the food ready to take and work out with the boys what we are going to do!
We also have to scan some photos to put in the front room window and one to put in the local paper. DS the elder just working out if we should paint a sheet and put it on the fence at the end of the road!

If my car sells it will give me a bit more dosh to book some spa treats for us both at Centre Parks. If not it will just have to be their swimming pool and hire bikes. His Mum has asked me to book a massage for him from them so he will have something.

Must dye my hair other wise it will look like his wife is old and grey rather than the fiesty brunette i want to be for the weekend!

 

[Mini]

Hi Jazzy,

How did the hair turn out and your weekend?

Hope you had a nice time.

Love Mini xxx

 

[Jazzyj]

Hi Mini,
Manged to get my hair done. Messy business! The perm i had done at the beginning of summer is now giving me a wild cavewoman look though! Ican't afford to have anything done with it so I think a severe conditioner, half a ton of serum and if all else fails a hat! loL Maybe several hats and tell everyone it is my new image! May even start singing Jamiroquai songs! Ha ha!
Don't feel weight loss gone well this week! tried to be good but had a couple of wobbles. Sadly with WW I don't think there is room for any wobbles!
Oh well back on the journey!

OMG I keep re- reading my posts and I have definitely got dyslexic fingers! I should double check more often! Sorry to everyone having to translate my scribes!!!

 

[Mini]

Morning Jazzy!

What kind of perm

You look like you have straight hair in your avatar!

Plenty of conditioner will help tame your 'cave woman look'!!

I got a perm done when Pierce was about two and he cried and made strange when he saw me as I looked so different to the mom that had left a few hours previous.

Another time I got a perm it sort of burnt my hair, it kept breaking and of course went a few years later and tried again and sat crying in the hairdressers chair as they all worked frantically around me telling me everything would be okay!!! I walked out looking like Shirlee Temple

Been a while now...but had a few other scary times in the hairdressers chair

A friend of my sisters normally goes to a hairdresser to get her hair dyed and in a hurry one weekend and she put in a shop dye without first doing a skin test patch...

Felt very unwell and landed in hospital close to death from the reaction...It turns out now she is allergic to all hair dyes and has to let nature take its course!

Anyways that's me gone off on a tangent!

Well I am off to a good start and yesterday I set the timer on the oven to go off every 30 minutes so that I would make sure to drink my water and do some exercise etc., and it has worked very well.

Need to tone up for this Christmas dress I hope to buy!

Hope you have a good day today Jazzy!

Love Mini xxx

 

[Jazzyj]

ARGHHH! just spent ages posting a lovely long update, pressed spell check and a muscle man offering supplements popped up and then my post was gone!
If I get time I'll do it again later!
Bl@@dy computers!
xxxx

 

[Jazzyj]

11th October

Well the weekend came and went and it is Weds already! Where does the time go!
Suprise weekend at Centre Parks was a success. OH didn't suss until the first sign post to Longleat!
The weather was good all the time, in fact couldn't have asked for better!
We had lots of fun playing badminton and the boys played squash & tennis with OH. We had lots of healthy food (washed down with some wine )
I didn't do any jogging as planned, so a bit miffed at myself at that.
I did have a hissy fit as they were trying to make me go down the rapids slide in the pool. I really didn't want to. The idea makes my tummy spin! they kept saying go on just the once! OH was a bit nasty saying I was like DS the younger not trying new food and if I wanted to be a wimp so be it! I felt very sad and isolated. In the end I climbed on to it and whooshed down the first bit and hated it! I was nearly in tears and wanted to get out. I got no support from OH who looked at me like I'd betrayed my country! The lifeguard was really sweet and helped me to climb out. She told me her mum wouldn't do it and there are lots of people who don't do it! Guess I'm not ready to feal the fear!
I tried to snap out of it but did feel upset at my family's attitude to me. I was then left in the pool swimming trying my best not to cry. I was bit like Dorean in Nemo! Just keep swimming, just keep swimming!

Nway, was ok after a bit, put it behind me. OH & DS the elder went off to watch footie. By the time they met us they'd had a few beers and were louder then everyne else in the restaurant queue. I gently tried to keep them in check. OH said he didn't want to eat with someone sucking lemons .
Ok I was, but I was still sensitive from earlier. I suggested that they go for the meal and as I wasn't mega hungry I'd meet them back at the villa! I was calm about it but again wanting to sob. They weren't happy. But I think if I'd have stayed there would have been a row.
I walked back and had a good cry. They all came back and hour later with deep fried chicken and chips! They were suprised when I still said I didn't want any! I haven't eaten anything like that since pre Lighter Life days and they know it. Even then I never ate KFC.
The next day guess what??????
No mention of anything, just carried on as if nothing had happended.

Nothing ever gets brought up again and dealt with. If I raise it I'm stirring things up!

Oh well, too tired to swim against the tide this week so going with the flow for a bit!

Other than that the weekend was good.

Missed my weigh in so I'll have to be very focused and get back to it next week. (Ooh I put on 1/2 last week, I miscalculated my points!)

I'm not letting the gain worry me though as I'm learning and it will take time!

 

[Jazzyj]

Mini
Re hair. I had a perm b4 the summer hols, thinking it maybe my last chance b4 I go short again. (still undecided on that one!) I have to work really hard putting lotions and potions on it to tame it though. I thought it may be easier. Think I may try Icemooses style instead!

Here is a pic with my boys soon after having it done

 

[4busybee]

Oh hun sounds like the weekend wasn't so good for you. Have to say i went to center parcs last month with a friend and although i loved the rapids i hated the other slides and would have felt very upset if i had been made to get on. Really think that your OH seems abit insensitive to your fears and also your diet it would seem. Never mind maybe if you had a calm quiet chat with him just to explain what you are feeling and let him know that you are not having a moan that you just want to sort things out before it goes too far and you will end up blowing your top. I was going through problems last year with my marriage and because i never raised my issues when i should have it all got completely out of hand and one day i just ended up going completely mad and chucking him out. We have managed to sort things now but my advise to you would be try and sort it before things get too much for you. However i do understand how you feel about not wanting to go againest the tide, it does wear you out when you wantthings to get resolved but the other person seems to think alls well.

Anyway sorry to have gone on abit and i hope you haven't been offended by my advise i mean after all i don't know you from Adam but i just felt for you when i read your post.

Well done for getting back track with your points sure that 1/2 you gained has gone by now.

Love Busy XX

 

[Jazzyj]

Thanks for that Busy!
Sadly I think most of it is all in nmy head and my perception of things at the moment! I'm sooo over-sensitive at the moment. Really need to sort my head out.

Hopefuly today will be better
xxx