Meow^..^'s wittily-named diary

[Val72]

Hi LoChan - I know that is what i thought to - bizarre!! I am also out in a small country town, so am not sure if it is any different in sydney - but am sure the demand would be there. It is amazing how much i took for granted when i was in the UK.

Hi Meow - am feeling like I hijacked your thread. I hope you are ok xxx

 

[LoChan1984]

Heys Meow - hope you're just busy and not hiding from minimins :bighug:xxx

 

[meow^..^]

Well.

I'm not really sure how to start.

I've not gone off the wagon, really. But my head's been somewhere strange. I think it might still be there. Or if it's not 'there', at least it's not completely back. I've been trying to bring myself to write something here most of the day, but finding it quite hard to work up to it. Not because I don't want to, I do. But it's just hard to start again.

I last wrote something around the 3rd week of Oct, just before going on a weekend trip to Blackpool.* I woke up feeling a bit poorly that morning, and then by the time we got back home I was down with what I can only imagine must have been man-flu. Ended up sitting around the house for ages with it, watching a TV show that I'd had all 5 seasons of for ages but had never gotten around to watching. So I got completely and utterly obsessed with it and couldn't stop watching and got through the whole lot in just over a week. In the meantime, since I was quite ill and was occupying every waking second with something else, I just completely forgot about Minimins. I tend to do that, with TV shows, books, etc., I'm sure it's a sign of some sort of mental health problem.

Anyway, I watched these 5 seasons, and then it ended. I was completely devastated. Firstly because my new best friend was no longer with me. And secondly because of the way it ended. I repeat - devastated. I actually couldn't stop thinking about it for days; half of that time I was on the brink of tears, and in actual tears for the other quarter. I've been watching various comedies and other nonsense shows since then because I don't feel ready to 'let another one in'.

Now, I am quite aware that anyone who happens to be reading this is probably already thinking about those mental health problems that I mentioned earlier.** I can't say that it's a thought that hasn't been pacing back and forth across my mind over the past few weeks. I am TOO OLD for this.

Is this a common trend with me? I can, with 99% certainty, hand on my heart, say 'No, it's not.'

The only thing that is making feel even a little bit better is my deep-seated suspicion that this just a symptom of a different problem. One that I think is on the way out. We moved here around 7 months ago, and I just didn't anticipate how hard it was going to be. I don't think I thought it was going to be a walk in the park, but I didn't think I would be as stressed as I have been. I find it difficult to make friends and it's not like I had a massive load of them back in NZ, and my family's always been far away and I don't rely on them or even keep in touch very much, but it's been harder than I imagined not knowing anyone at all here. I mean of course there are people at work, and I've seen some of them outside of work occasionally. Making good friends takes time. Plus my partner has been unemployed for most of the time we've been here, and it's been more of a struggle financially than we had planned on. It's not like we've been on the poverty line at all. And yes, money doesn't buy happiness. But not having any can sure make you pretty bloody miserable.

I realise that I am complaining about first-world problems here. But they're quite real to me, and I don't really want any criticism for it.

Good news: I feel like I am getting my mind back. And my partner has finally got a job, which he'll be starting Monday week. So, income has doubled, outgoings will be increased petrol and transport costs. Long-dreamed-of holiday in Barcelona is on the horizon.

Good news: since the day that I last posted, I've lost about 5.5 lbs. It's not a lot given how long it's been, but it's not a gain, so I'll take what I'm given. It seems that I am very strongly affected by my periods, I've been putting on weight during that week. I've now had an IUS inserted, so I am hoping that it will get better. The least I am hoping for is some cycle control, at least so I can go on holiday or work trips and not worry about being arrested for murdering somebody and disposing of the body, and hopefully, in time, it will minimise any weight gain during my periods.

LoChan, if you're reading this, thank you so much for posting and asking me where I was - it really was a big driver to me coming back. I seemed to lose a lot more weight and was generally a bit happier when I was coming on here all the time than I have been in the last few weeks since I went MIA.

Val, feel free to take over my thread and have a chat, I really enjoyed reading your conversation! Makes me feel included and generally warm and fuzzy on the inside.

I have been missing you two!

Right, bad news: I've done something to my leg. I've already got a bad ankle, so I need a second bad leg like I need a hole in the head, frankly. It started about a week and a half ago, felt like a slightly strained muscle in my upper thigh and I thought it would go away in a few days' time. No such luck, and it even seems to be getting worse, to the point where I am in quite a bit of pain when weight bearing around 80% of the time. Will be making an appointment to see a GP on Monday, hopefully I can get in to see someone soon. I am meant to be going on to a conference in London 7-9 Dec, don't want to miss out on that.


*As a side note, I don't regret going. But I'm not going back.

**Just to clarify, I am not talkin' smack about mental health problems, and I do have a (somewhat limited) educational background in the area. I just mean that I suspect I have a problem. Just like I suspect I have a leg problem.

 

[LoChan1984]

So happy you came back hun :bighug: You had me worried

Sorry to hear about you being poorly and that you're feeling stressed/lonely I can imagine it's a massive adjustment to make being transplanted to the other side of the world. Are there any groups/evening classes you could join as a way to meet new people (might be more affordable now your OH has got sorted with a new job and all)?

I'm pretty much all on my own too but that's mostly all down to the way I am really. Think Minimins is my little outlet to exercise my sociable side. It's nice on it's own but at times I wish we all lived a little closer so meeting up irl was doable too as internet socialising is a substitute only up to a point huh. Eh, what to do

Don't fret over complaining on here, it's your diary and you can talk/rant about anything you want to if it makes you feel better, I ain't one to critisise, I do it myself on mine - it's partly what it's there for right?

Oh god I am exactly like you for watching series of tv shows or japanese anime non-stop like that (series of books aswell) and I end up feeling lost when I come to the end of a series - so you've got company in that particular trait of crazy

Hmn I hope the IUS works well for you. I've had the implanon arm-implant thingy for the past three years, due to be replaced in december but I was pondering trying something else instead as I hate the irregularity it seems to cause. I should read up I guess and have a proper think about it...

Hope the doctors appointment goes well for your leg trouble too - let us know how you get on. Will you get any non-work time out while you're down in London? I'm going for a weekend in february, need to get my shoulder to the grindstone and work hard to get into the 19s by then, I can dream at least lol

 

[meow^..^]

Yay, Lo, you’re still here! I am so very pleased :bighug: I’ve been in much better spirits over the last few days.

Maybe we should do a ‘date’, I’ve been wanting to see the Manchester Christmas markets. We tried the Chester ones yesterday, and I suppose they’re not in full swing yet, but it was fairly meagre.

The IUS is supposed to cause some irregularity, but they say it should settle down after a few months. I’ve been having a bit of period-like pain since it’s been put in (nothing as bad as actual period pain, mind you) and I wonder if some of that was coming from my leg. I suspect this might be something like a groin* strain? It was fairly sore yesterday when we were wandering around the markets, but actually seems to be better today. I just went on the Wii and it didn’t hurt while I was doing stepping, so I am hoping that it’s on the mend! I did make an appointment to see a GP on Thursday morning (soonest I could get in!), and I’ll keep it for now just in case it flares up again. This is great, because I might actually be able to lose some weight this week!

I started watching my TV show from the start. I’ve been wanting to re-watch the final couple of episodes because I feel like I didn’t have ‘closure’ (I got myself all upset and don’t think I took it all in properly), but I can’t bring myself to do it. I thought that I’d be a mess watching the start again, but I’m OK, actually, it warms my heart. FLOVE it. I’m glad my flavour of crazy is so accepted here, because I can imagine myself regaling a psychiatrist with this narrative! My other half just looks at me like I’m a very lost soul and shakes his head quietly to himself...

Right, London. I didn’t have an amazing day at work today, seem to have kept running into really frustrating situations. One of them being that I mentioned to someone what has been going on with my leg and I was worried about London. And all of a sudden it’s all “Let’s make a plan for someone else to go in case you can’t” and people are arranging babysitters. I was just totally flabbergasted by the whole thing. The bed’s still warm, FFS!!

I probably won’t have much of a chance to look around down there, and can’t stay for the weekend since my work Christmas party is on the Saturday night (it’s an overnight trip to Harrogate, so going to take in some Yorkshire site-seeing!). But now that the other half is employed, should have some spare pennies to go down there at some point next year. I know some people down there whom I worked with in NZ many years ago, so it’d be nice to go for a drink.

*One of my least favourite words. EVER. It’s just not attractive.

 

[meow^..^]

Right, am restarting a food diary. I am still doing Extra Easy since I’ve not managed to sit down and plan my meals for the week, and I feel like Red and Green day require forethought. But, since my other half is going to start working fulltime next week, plus driving me to work and then picking me up again, we’re going to have to get our asses into gear and plan what we’re going to be eating every day. Just got a slow cooker, and I feel like it should be fairly easy to make loads of meals that are free on Red and definitely on Extra Easy, with loads of super-free veg in them. I also just got a recipe keeper/planner book thing, so I’ll be able to collect all those recipes out of magazines that I like the look of.

So today....
Breakfast: usual muesli (HEXB) with sweetened soya milk (part of HEXA) and fruit.

Lunch: left-over rice risotto with chicken and a pile of green beans.

Dinner: homemade ‘hashbrowns’ with smoked salmon and another pile of green beans: I am attempting food pornography a la Lo. I didn’t eat all of the hashbrowns + smoked salmon, so there is some left over for lunch/a snack tomorrow.

I almost got a really cute picture of my cat trying to get at the salmon, but it didn't come out well.

Snacks: apples (3 I think, or at least 2), little satsumas (3? 4?), Mullerlight yoghurt.

Exercise: Wii stepping (to ep 01.05!) for 20 min.

I need to remember to keep drinking something. I normally have a coffee at home with breakfast, another big coffee when I get to work, and then maybe 2-3 cups of tea during the day. Then some soft drink and at least 1 cup of tea at home in the evening. Generally no water, although if I’m going to a dance class I’ll take a bottle of water with me and will drink around ¾ of it. (All of my drinks are black with artificial sweetener.)
Anyway, I had to do a fasting blood a couple of weeks ago (my father’s been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes recently, so they’re checking me up) and I went in and they got about 5 mL out and then it just stopped. So like nothing more came out. I have to go back this week, so I am determined that this won’t happened again. But forgot to drink anything today!

 

[Val72]

Hi Meow - great to see you back and on track - food porn looks yum! I used to struggle with drinking 'properly' But now I put a couple of small bottles of water in the fridge - not sure why but cold water always tastes nicer, also go some nice sugar free squash. Still sometimes I have to remind myself to drink something!!

Hope you are having a good day xxx

 

[LoChan1984]

I was doing a big reply earlier in the day but I rambled on so long minis logged me out and I lost it, tsch! Let's try again lol

Made me chuckle reading about doing a 'date' - out of the five people I've met from online I married/divorced one, went out with another and am living with the last one. They were all blokes though so you should be safe :giggle:Sounds like fun though if you do come over for the markets, s'long as I won't be a bit of a gooseberry if you were visiting them as a couply day out with your OH

Which of the IUS/D things do you have, the hormone one or the copper one? I was thinking of the copper one to see what it'd be like being free of the synthetic-hormones for once in my adult life. Hmn - do you have to keep going back to get it check and stuff or once it's in do they leave you alone for a while? I've read conflicting stuff online and might have been reading US guides instead of Uk ones

Cheeky bleeders, your work folk trying to shunt you off the London trip! Hope they don't get away with it and you still get to go despite the not getting much opportunity for a lookabout. I've only been there the once and my OH hated it, nothing there for him - too many shops for me lol Dragging him back for Phantom at least hehe. I've not been to Harrogate, an overnight trip seems quite s****y for a work do lol Hope you enjoy it

Food is looking good and hurrah for the food porn! Long may it reign supreme How'd you make your hash browns? Not had any of those for a while, mmmm :drool:

I am being crap at drinking water too, did the weekly challenge with it but let things slip during my two weeks offplan, just not finding it very appealing atm - though I can get through a 2ltr bottle of diet fizz easily enough most days of the week Hope the blood test is more successful this week and that they sort your leg troubles out for you too

Mn could you remind me what day your WIs are just so I know? And just noticed today you've gone past the 1st loss mark - well done on the milestone xxxx

 

[LoChan1984]

Lol, prude Minis - the starred out word should be sw@nky (i.e. posh), not what it's insinuating!

 

[meow^..^]

Hi Val, I’m glad that you’re still around too! Are you doing well? Totally forgot to drink water again today... I really do just think it tastes bad...!! I’m sure that’s evolutionarily bad for me.

Lo, I’m the least romantic person ever, so doubt you’d be raspberrying (or was it gooseberrying?) if OH and I came to Manchester to hang out – plus it’s been like 100 years! And I’d pleased that I’ll be able to let my guard around you – I am officially lulled into a false sense of security! Teehee!

And how could sw@nky be rude? I don’t get it. Is it because it’s sort of close to w@nky? Or is there more English humour that I don’t understand? It’s very hard being foreign

I have the hormone IUS (Mirena). Apparently the hormone is released only locally into the uterus and cervix, and only very tiny amounts get into the rest of the blood stream – so your exposure would be around 70 times less than say taking the pill (don’t quote me on that number!). The non-hormone copper one can apparently have the side effect of increasing pain and making periods heavier, which is exactly what I’m trying to avoid. My GP’s surgery has a specialist nurse who knows all about contraception, perhaps you could talk to someone like that when it comes time to replace your implant?

People keep saying how I’m going to have a great time in London shopping and I’m like “C’mon people, have you seen me? I do my shopping on the internet on my fat ladies’ websites”. But the congress centre is really central, so I might get some good photos. I am very excited about my Harrogate night away, and getting all dolled up. If there are any nice photos, I’ll put them up. Talking about which, my food pornography came out really big, how do you post images so they’re little and then get big if you click on them, like yours do? And what does ‘mn’ stand for?

OH’s hashbrown recipe: grated potato (in small batches put it into a muslin cloth or a tea towel - a non-furry on! – and wring as much moisture as possible out of it), finely chopped onion, season well, salt and pepper, mix in an egg so it’s all through. Then put dollops of the mixture into a pan with FryLight, squish them down so they’re about a cm thick and fry them off until the potato is cooked (3-4 min/side). Spray the uncooked side with FryLight just before flipping. He basically just says to “Play around with it.” Could put whatever else you wanted in the mixture, spices, cheese, bacon... When I was asking for the recipe and he asked why I wanted it and I confessed to putting pictures of last night’s dinner on the internet, he laughed and shook his head. It was quite similar to his “Are you watching QAF again?” look....

My leg is WAY better today. I got asked to pass on the details for my train tickets to London, so I put my foot down and said that I was feeling better and would be going as planned. So now, even if gets worse, I’m going anyway, this is what they made drugs for!

I weigh in on Sat mornings, like you! ‘Cause, remember, we’re twins! Only I don’t have children and if your username is anything to go by, you might be a wee bit younger than me

I did make it to a stone! I was very pleased at the time, but now I feel like it’s all too slow. I keep seeing people on here who started around the same time (first week of Sep) and they’ve lost like 3 stone! But I’ll get there eventually, and it’ll be beautiful.

 

[meow^..^]

Breakfast: the usual (I’m not writing it out anymore!!) (HEXB and part HEXA)

Lunch: leftover rice risotto with bits of chicken and green beans, banana, apple

Dinner: lasagne with Quorn mince and Quark, with a sprinkling of cheese on top (rest of HEXA; no 1/3 superfree )

Snacks: bananas (2), apples (2), Mullerlight yoghurt, a mini blueberry muffin (11 Syns)

Exercise: Wii stepping 20 min (to ep 01.06, because I’m mentally ill!)

 

[LoChan1984]

Hehe 'Mn' is just me making a noise to myself and typing it aloud - kinda like Hmm but less thoughtful, and like Umm but less awkward? If you see what I mean

I think minis thinks I was trying to sneak in the word w@nk amongst other letters or something, it's a bit dumb

My appointment with the contraceptive nurse is on the 14th so will have a chat with them about things Don't want to have to swap to the pill in the interim though as I always forget to take the darn things

I'm always wondering how people do the big pictures lol I just add them as attatchments using the paperclip icon thingy when i post a message and it turns into one of those dinky picture links *shrugs* it's very mystical and above my pc knowledge

With me London is mostly a bag shopping destination as I'm stuck in the big shops for clothes too and there's not much point trekking down there for an Evans I love Lulu Guinness bags and purses and had fun dragging my OH around harrods and fortnum and masons - those last two were mostly for the food though :giggle:

I shall give the hashbrowns a whirl at the weekend for a bacon brunch, cheers

I keep annoying my OH having to turn the big light on (takes her hat off to Peter Kay, you may or may not get that reference, sorry Foreigner lol) if I'm taking pictures of my tea in the living room, 'cause the bulbs keep blowing out in the kitchen. Don't worry, they get used to the new food porn crazy if they see minis is keeping us in good spirits

D'oh I should have remembered the twin thing today while I was looking at your stats lol You've gone a few lbs down ahead of me though, not updated mine yet since I put 2 on again last saturday... kinda want to leave it be as I already took my 3.5st shiny out of my signature, that was mentally hard in a first-world-slimming-world-problems way

Loving your attitude towards taking things slowly - be proud of yourself

I'm still getting my head around taking things slowly, think I'd got it into my head when I started end of July that I'd be aiming to have 10st gone with a year - at first I was pretty much hitting that 1st every four weeks mark but the past month I've been back and forth and struggling - probably from setting myself too high a goal and my insecure fat-girl me rebelling against the goody-two-shoes me! Being a little bit naughty tonight too with some chocolate cornflake bites already snaffled and there's a chocolate brownie sitting across from me giving me the beady eye treatment Trying to stare it down for the moment lol

 

[meow^..^]

Been starving and freezing all day today! Quite embarrassed about how much food I have managed to put away....

Breakfast: the usual (HEXB and part of HEXA)

Lunch: leftover lasagne from last night. And I actually realised that there are loads of green beans and mushrooms in it, so it might just about be 1/3 superfree. A banana and an apple.

Dinner: more leftover lasagne with an extra big side of green beans

Snacks: oh, just a couple of little things! Mullerlight yoghurt, 2 bananas, 2 apples, a satsuma, a bowl of noodles (elevenses due to starving and freezing! 1 Syn), 2 boiled eggs, a HiFi bar (1.5 Syns)

Exercise: dance class (~1.5 hours)

 

[meow^..^]

Today’s food:

Breakfast: same as usual (HEXB and part HEXA)

Lunch: went out to lunch today to farewell a colleague who is leaving, I ordered a steak burger. Don’t know why expected it would have a chunk of steak, I got a beef patty, which was most likely full of fat. I ate the meat and cheese but put the bread aside. Didn’t have much of the ‘Caesar salad’, just a few leaves and nibbled on a couple of the cheese gratings (wouldn’t have made up the remainder of my HEXA). Syns? I don’t know, I am assuming that the meal was 15 Syns.

Dinner: Some homemade ‘curry’ that hubby made. It wasn’t really curry, he got fat-free natural yoghurt and put piles of korma powder it in and then put it all in the slow cooker with some chicken and veges. Not a lot of veges, mind you.

Snacks: 3 apples, 2 bananas

Exercise: Dance class (~1.5 hours)

I am really struggling to get my 1/3 super-free this week. This weekend the plan is to populate the recipe planner that has now arrived with recipes from magazines, plan meals for the week and do a full shop to make sure we have everything we need. Monday = hubby’s first day of full-time employment for a few months! I’ve taken the day off tomorrow, looking forward to a sleep-in.

 

[meow^..^]

Lo, hope your appointment goes well! The woman I had was really good and seemed to know her stuff. Must say I’ve had a bit of pain and ‘irregularity’ in the last couple of days, but they do say it can take a few months to settle right down. It’s only been a couple of weeks, so I’m definitely giving it a chance.

You do a big picture by uploading it to your photo album and then clicking on the little picture icon (looks like a dinky landscape) and putting in the URL to the album.... very roundabout way of doing it, you paperclip is a lot more straightforward, now that I’ve found it!

I’d never heard of Lulu Guiness before, but just looked the handbags up and I’m in flove! I also recently discovered Irregular Choice shoes. I sooooo want some. Unfortunately, I have weak ankles and weigh as much as an adolescent elphenant, so I think I will work on strengthening those up and shedding some weight and getting myself some of them as a reward. I was talking to someone at work about the shoes the other day and she was like ‘Why don’t you just buy them?’ and I said that I couldn’t just out and get posh shoes like that just to wear to work/whatever, and she asked ‘Why not?’. And I thought to myself, why can’t I be the girl who wears stunning shoes to work for no good reason? And maybe one day soon I’ll have clothes to match. But I’ll still hold off getting them until a major milestone of some sort.

I’m glad that I’m portraying such a good image of serenAnna happily losing weight slowly! It takes a lot of constantly reassuring myself that it’s OK to do slowly. And I feel like the more I say it, the more I will believe it. And consciously, I know a lot of things. I know that I am more likely to keep it off if it comes off slowly. I know that I am less likely to get loose skin problems if it’s slow. There is just an unconscious part (or not so unconscious!) that demands immediate gratification. But I guess that’s how I got here. One of my concerns is that I’d like to see my parents again soon (within the next 6 months) and I just do NOT want another conversation about my weight.

Hope you won the staring contest with that muffin! xx

 

[LoChan1984]

Hiya Anna, how'ya doing?

Seems you've been feeling quiet too, hope everything is alright :bighug:

How's your hubby finding the new job?

You MUST take pictures of the shoes if you buy some Irregular Choice ones I found out about those on here, don't think I'll be able to get any unless my feet shrink with weight loss. Plus have never been a high heels person, and trying to learn how to walk in them at this size isn't easy lol Might join you in the using them for a major milestone reward, we'll see

I've decided to take a bit of time out from SW over christmas to give my head a bit of space. Couldn't seem to go more than a couple of days on plan without having a bit of a cheat so it seemed wiser just to have a proper break from it altogether. Calorie counting instead but not eating very healthily Should try and encorporate the 1/3 superfree into everything really but I don't feel like eating a bowl of salad with my chocolate biscuits and coffee of an evening :giggle:

Let us know how y'getting on soon huh? xxx