Definitely, Poppy. When I was quite ill a few years ago I was also a few stone bigger than I am now and I just stopped leaving the house. Dealing with people being very unkind in public was too much, I wanted to hide away. It's taken a lot of work to regain some confidence, and it's stupid really because I'd never judge anyone for their size, I know a lot of very beautiful people who are bigger than me - they're more confident than me, they have fab partners and do great things. I don't believe weight should be a barrier to anything.
And yet I've made it my own barrier by being scared of being judged by others. I'm better than I was but it's still an issue. I want to love myself at any and every size but I was getting bigger again as I was eating to punish and comfort myself, not because I was happy with who I was.
So we'll see. I have a few journeys to go on and they're all quite a long way, physically and emotionally, I think.
Anyway:
Having my goey salted caramel pudding. Undercooked slightly by accident so it's mostly goo but very yummy goo so I don't care. Tastes like condensed milk caramel. I added some extra sweetner - all the exante puddings have been slightly undersweet for my tastes, and now it's perfect.
The funny thing is, I'm not really a dessert person. I like chocolate etc but when we go out I almost never have dessert, and I often don't want dessert when I'm eating at someone else's. I have much more of a savoury tooth, but perhaps because I like savoury foods more, the exante savoury packs (most of them) taste less good to me than the sweet ones, because I'm not as fussed about sweets.
It's nice to be able to eat a sweet without worrying too much about being bodyslammed by a sugar crash, too.
I do think having 3 sweet packs helps satiety, because I wouldn't usually have 3 puddings in a day so my body feels like it's had treats.
