My mum is INSISTING on cooking roast lamb, what should I do?

[Caz]

My mum knows that I'm tying to calorie count and eat healthy. She is supportive of me losing weight but doesn't always understand when I don't want to eat things. Ever since I was a kid she gave us portions far too big etc. and she just doesn't really get it. I've been cooking my own meals all week, partly because it means I get to calorie count and eat more healthily and partly because I've only just moved back in with them and it feels like the last piece of my independence, if that makes sense!

Anyway, my mum's planned a roast lamb tomorrow. Apparently she got confused and thought tomorrow was Sunday and it's out of the freezer now etc. I thought about it but decided that I didn't want it because I know it's not exactly healthy and the roasted potatoes and parsnips etc. I'm working from 6pm til midnight anyway so I said don't worry about it and she just kept insisting and saying she'll do it for 5 instead.

So I don't know what to do. I like roast lamb but at the moment I just don't want all of those calories. And I know that my mum isn't particularly sparing when it comes to her use of oil! So I'm torn between wanting to be healthy and not wanting to offend her. I thought about just having boiled potatoes instead of the roasted ones. Or maybe doing the roast potatoes for everyone and trying to do them in a more healthy way. But she's so fickle and takes things personally! Urgh, this is where living by myself or in a shared house is so much easier!

Sorry rant and stress over! What would you do?

 

[leighleigh]

Ok, first of all. Eat the roast dinner. You're going to have to get used to meals like this at some point; nobody can calorie count forever. And there are going to be occasions and events in the future when you're NOT going to be able to count your calories or even get a rough idea in your head about how much your taking in (ohh weddings, you are the devil). Eating this dinner will give you valuable experience in a) understanding you can eat this W/O ruining your diet or weeks of hard work and b)gives you valuable experience in lowering the calorie count in unexpected situations such as this.

First of all, fill 2/3 of your plate with boiled vegetables. Then trim the fat off of the lamb and that should take up half of the space that's left. In the space that is left after that 1 large (or 2 small) potatos and one roast parsnip. No gravy or sauces of any kind (though I don't think mint sauce is that bad). Then at the end of the meal, make sure you're eaten all of the boiled veg and save at least 5 bites of lamb/potato/parsnip. A trick i tought myself was to leave five bites of food left at the end of the meal after eating all of my veg. You'll be surprised how many calories are in those 5 small bites!

Simples. Your calories are drastically reduced, your mum isn't offended, you get a tasty roast and you also learn that the odd roast now and again won't do any harm (and you'll probably appreciate it in years to come!)

 

[The Moog]

Lamb itself isn't too bad on the calorie front. I'd be ok with eating that, although I'd avoid the roast potatoes and bulk up on whatever veg she's cooked (or offer to steam some yourself to go with her lamb)

I think it's one of those ones where you're going to have to manage as best as you can without eating too much. Hang onto the thought that one meal isn't going to undo all the good you've done.

 

[Caz]

I know that I can have it and it'll be ok but it's more that at the moment I'm really actually liking cooking more healthily. I don't mind there being times when I can't work out the calories that I've eaten but I don't know, for some reason I'm just not particularly into this roast tomorrow. The prospect of it makes it seem like such a big heavy meal! Maybe I'm being silly, I don't know. I think I made a bigger deal out of it than it is because I feel like it's been forced upon me and just feels like another time when my mum verbally supports me but sometimes makes it more difficult in reality. When I was doing the Cambridge Diet, so total food replacement, she constantly tried to persuade me to eat things, just small saying it won't hurt. But after 24 years, all of those things have hurt! Anyway, sorry to keep going on, I'm probably making no sense at all!

 

[lindseydodd408]

My Mum is the same, whenever she does a roast I take a smaller plate to her house and watch as she dishes up. I have a bit of meat, then fill up the rest of my small plate with boiled veggies... occassionally I will treat my plate to a little stuffing, or one roast potato, or a little yorkshire pud, or mash, depending on whats on offer and what I'm craving as a little treat to naughty up my plate. Then I always have gravy because I LOVES the gravy. x

 

[The Moog]

Mine doesn't have a clue either, so I know exactly where you're coming from. I was force-fed apple-pie and cream last week. Well, she thought she did. Hubby leapt to the rescue when her back was turned and he wolfed the lot!

 

[Fattack]

My mum did the exactly the same with duck last week. Luckily she doesn't roast it in any fat or anything, just onions and gravy really, so I simply measured out the amount I had and included it in my days allowance. I had a couple of potatoes but mostly veg and stayed within my allowance for the day. Good luck!

 

[Rigby]

If you really think it will upset her for you not to have it then I'd probably suggest having some but keeping the portion fairly small. As someone else rightly said, you need to be still eating 'normal' meals and, I think, being involved in the social aspect of eating as a family, which might apply to this situation. Also, it's only one day: yes, you might go over your calorie limit, but that's set as being a value lower than the value at which you would maintain your current weight, so you probably won't go over that calorie value anyway, if that makes sense? Don't worry about it, enjoy a sensible portion of it and if you feel guilty for it then do a little bit of extra exercise? That would be my approach to it anyway

 

[Caz]

After all that she's decided to cook it tomorrow (as she thought it was Sunday today!) when I'm out at work all day anyway! They'll eat around when I get back but I'm going to have to say no to it I think as I'm working 11-6 and the lunch on a Sunday has to be a roast as it's all they do. Though, I might just take a salad with me instead actually thinking about it.

thanks for all the advice guys, it's appreciated!

Lindsey I'm with you, gravy is a must! I'll just have a little, I never have too much anyway.

Moog that's hilarious! If only I had a husband to act as my hoover for me!!

I think the next time my mum does a roast and I'm around to help with it I'm going to do the roast potatoes so that I can do them in less oil and they won't be so bad! It's not even the calories that bother me, it's just the unhealthiness of them. For the first time in my life I'm actually wanting the healthier options and the thought of the non-healthy options a lot of the time really puts me off!

 

[chick10]

Id just eat it, and have what ever you want. Im having a roast today, and ill be having loads, especially roasties mmmm. Ive been good all day, so i deserve it

 

[fairybutterfly]

excuse my naivety, but what is actually so bad in a roast dinner? I only ask because my Mum is doing roast lamb/carrot & turnip/roasties/parsnips and gravy for easter sunday? but apart from the roasties, lean lamb and veg is surely ok?
or is it how it's all cooked? i really dislike roasts so i never ever had them, the only time i do is christmas lol. obv the potatos are done in fat, is the lamb also done this way and parsnips?

sorry im more a pizza girl than a roast one :-D

 

[Caz]

Different people cook them differently and its more the way its cooked like you say. The fat is definitely the worst way!

 

[fairybutterfly]

and usually the tastiest! lol :-(

 

[gina_b]

i dont even eat roast dinners at christmas, not CC or anything but im not a big meat lover!

 

[Agent Shagwell]

If there's something really tasty and fattening for dinner, I just try and not eat anything else all day. Or maybe eat fruit. Yeah fruit is good. Or those meal shakes. Or instant soup (cup o soup things) or miso packet soup (10 calories) and some low fat crackers. You can get through a day on 200 - 400 calories and just put up with feeling hungry. Then have the roast with gravy and even some dessert if there's some there and be like 'well at the most that would be 1800 calories so at least I won't have GAINED weight today'. The end.