14th June
Just noticed on my last post put 13th February

Not sure why I'd have done that

Must be the excitement of oncoming training day
LOL - didn't notice, until you pointed it out of course
I found out what the smell was! Another warm day here (until about 5.00 and BBQ was lit, then it poured down and hasn't stopped:sigh

This morning the smell hit me again, so got kids sorted for school, did the school run and straight home for another investigation. I found it...a dead mouse




, tucked under one of my kitchen cabinets, it hadn't been residing with us as there were no droppings, so am presuming one of my cats hid it there

The stench when I picked it up!!!!!!!!!:sign0137:
Oh yuck - thank goodness you found it though.
I've applied for a job

! After thinking ok have some time to myself, it lasted 3 days!!!!!! Job is only tiny one though, part time post office counter assistant, 10 hours per week, which I presume is over 2 days.
Sounds good, 10 hours will be nice & easy.
Had my weigh in today and have lost 3 lbs. That is 4 stone in total, and officially the slimmest I have ever been!!!!!!!! I hadn't planned to lose any more weight, so as of today I am upping my food intake again! The last thing I want to be is boney and gaunt. It is so difficult getting the balance right. I think maybe I haven't had enough food as part of me is scared to gain any weight. It's definately trial and error getting this eating thing under control!
It is trial & error, I did exactly the same as you after getting to my goal, I then lost a few more pounds and to my surprise heard myself say - I don't want to lose any more weight - never thought I'd say that, but you do need to have an upper and a lower limit on your weight and aim to stay in between the two. It does a bit of juggling and getting used to, but just continue to take it one day at a time, keep an eye on the scales so you can tweak it before it gets out of hand.
My Dad phoned me today, and we had a very emotional chat, he told me how he'd always been so proud of me, both with my achievements and as a person and that he was so pleased that I seemed to finally be proud of myself.:cry:
Aww that's lovely Tracey, and really great that your dad could tell you this, my dad's very "stiff upper lip" type and never talks about his feelings, which can be tough sometimes.
After his call I sat and thought how I'd always felt inside...fat and second best. I was a chubby kid, slimmed out a bit in my teens, but not for long and as an adult have always been overweight. I was always so shocked when anyone asked me for a date, and always thought perhaps it may have been a for a bet etc. Appearance was very important to me, as it is for any young girl. I could never quite understand why people were attracted to me.
I decided as the house was all quiet, that I'd meditate on how I felt as a younger woman and child. I used to meditate every day before I had my 3rd child and haven't really done much in the last 9 years, the house is always so noisy or I've been at work etc. I replayed some 'fat incidents' through my mind and felt how I had then, I mentally put all these old feelings and memories in a suitcase and threw them out to sea. I found myself crying my eyes out afterwards

but then felt like a huge load had been lifted. Anyone reading this will think I'm a loony, but it made me feel great and I intend to meditate again everyday, not just on old baggage, but just to clear my mind.
Not a loony at all Tracey, I think it's very healthy and to have "thrown out" those feelings you've been dragging around with you for years is uplifting and a wonderful thing to do - good for you. I could do with some of that myself, never been able to meditate though, should really give it a go.
Crikey all getting a bit heavy, so on that note I'm off to watch a bit of BB and bring myself back down to earth
Tracey
x