nzmegs - last chance saloon

[mimz]

hiya nzmegs

firstly thanks for posting in my diary, not been on here so couldnt reply x

well done on the losses so far, dont fret too much it all adds up by the end of the month, keep up the water and stay strong!!!

as elab said this is your second week and you smashed it!!!
anyhoo i will be back later to see how you do xxxxxxxx

 

[nzmegs]

Back again. Due to BT incompetence I have been without an internet connection for a few days...

Anyhoo - went to a WI today and lost 5 pounds! really pleased as this puts me past two of my goals. Into 12 stone bracket and half a stone or more lost. In fact 9 pounds lost with LL and another 2.5 with exante. So 11.5 all together. All in about 2.5 weeks.

it has been at least a year or more since I last weighed in the 12 stones...just Christmas to get past now. i will be abstaining totally. I really feel ready to tackle that one day and win.

I will have a pop in weigh in on the 24th and then another about 10 days later. So losses should be a little confused over this period.

Anyway had best be off as I have work to catch up on now that I can actually do some work...

 

[nzmegs]

i tried on some of my clothes which haven't seen the light of day for at least a couple of years. One skirt, which I bought recently (hoping it would fit) now fits and looks lovely. it is a size 14 and just a tiny bit snug. Just a couple more pounds and it will be ready for Christmas day.

I also put on a few other skirts which have been hiding in the back of the closet. being a pear shaped person I find that even if something fits me in the waist it can be too tight in the hips. Any pear shaped lady will be able to sympathise. I have a tunic top which is now too big across my shoulders and back, but still will not go across my hips... but you know what? Rather than get upset about that I just said to myself "this is my shape and it will always be this way regardless of my size or weight" the fact is my hips will never be in proportion to my upper body. I just have to dress to disguise it.

This means i can't wear straight skirts, skinny jeans or leggings unless they are disguised with a long top. it isn't the end of the world and I actually really love the way my waist is now more defined, my curves are showing through again and I am not ashamed of my muffin top.

I have hips!! Shout it from the rooftops, because this is what makes me the person I am. I am proud.

I no longer want to hate my body. Even when I still have 2 stone to lose, I am learning that loving myself is an important part of this journey and if I hate myself as a size 12, I won't have learned a single thing!

On to Christmas...due to some family tensions this Christmas is going to be weird to say the least. Not only can I not drown my sorrows in a glass of champagne or some Christmas pudding, I will be at someone else's house watching them eat and constantly making excuses for not participating.

I have considered going off for a walk during the meal. I don't know how rude this will come across, as tensions will already be high enough. I have also considered being the washer-upper. But my husband will need my support during the day so I need to be by his side. I can't really abandon him in that way.

This is about the most stressed I have felt about Christmas in a long time and typically it is down to family issues. I would rather just stay home to be honest and have my soup and a shake and enjoy the time with the kids. Ho Hum. No choice really.

Just to be clear. I am so looking forward to the time at home with just my little nuclear family. that will be brilliant.

Anyone else finding Christmas a little stressful?

 

[nzmegs]

Well, I made it through christmas! I did not cheat even once, I stuck to the plan like glue and sat through two christmas meals, plenty of snacks and drinks and had none of it. You would think I would come out the other side of that feeling proud of myself, but actually I felt very deflated and even a bit depressed...

Tell me if this is how any of you have been feeling? I felt like I missed out, that other people were enjoying themselves much more than me. Then this led on to feelings of not being myself.

it is like i look at myself in the mirror and don't recognise my body. My clothes don't fit like they used to, I feel quite light headed and "empty". I am not my old, cuddly self anymore - and i quite liked that person.

I think I am just losing this weight too quickly and it is taking some time to get used to it. the changes to my body have probably been subtle to other people but to me it feels extreme. I know that I will come out the other side feeling happy about what I have done, but right now the comments from people and the talk about how much "better"I look, just make me wonder what I was like before.

I was the same person, yet now I deserve compliments. it makes it feel shallow.

I know this is stemming from a need to treat myself or congratulate myself. I am used to doing that with food and I can't do that any more. it feels a bit like grief. strange. i hope that getting back to a normal routine next week will help me to snap out of it.

I don't normally suffer with feeling down. i am normally a very happy person.

 

[nzmegs]

Feeling much better now. I think christmas really took it out of me. It was so hard - much harder than I thought it would be - to stick to my diet and i thought i would get a sense of elation after I managed it. But I didn't. the whole season just passed as though it never happened. Then I discovered I only lost 2 measly pounds over christmas...

it really made me think about how much importance i place on activities to do with food. It really is silly as it should be about family and relaxation. At least I didn't feel bad about what I ate...

I have my official LL weigh in tomorrow and we start a new fresh week after the ups and downs of christmas. I am looking forward to being in a better routine. I want to lose 2 more pounds to get to one stone (with LL) in four weeks. I have already reached the one stone mark since i started dieting.

I am aiming for about 10 pounds over the next month (2-3 pounds each week). If i can do that then I will probably move to RTM. As I will only want to lose another 10 pounds or so.

My husband has started calling me the incredible shrinking woman. It has been amazing - the change to my body after just one stone of weight loss. I seem to be losing it from all the right places - my tummy and legs.

I know my weight loss is small compared to some others (I can't imagine how amazing it must feel to lose 4 stone...) but - for me this is still a revelation!

Still feels strange though.

 

[eatlikeabird]

Hi nzmegs,
Weightloss definitely challenges thinking, about ourselves and how others see us. As that image in the mirror changes and our clothes change, it takes time to catch up.
Glad you are feeling happier about things. I'm glad to be getting back to the routine, and looking forward to spring.

 

[nzmegs]

I went to Llods today to get my BP done and they refused! Couldn't believe it. I wasn't asking them to take responsibility for my health, weight or diet. just take the BP and tell me the results. I would even pay for it if required.

So anyway, my LLC is having a nurse come tonight to read BPs and I might be able to make it there. But might not. So tomorrow I will have to travel into town to go to the same Superdrug I went to to get my original form signed. it is such a hassle and annoying. I am really cross about it actually. If I had heart disease or a blood pressure problem it would be a case of me taking responsibility for my own health, but as i am on some "quack" diet they refuse.

Oh dear. Anyway. I took a walk to the supermarket today and bought some peppermint tea. I have been having a bit of a bloating issue lately and I am hoping the tea will help. My weight loss has also stalled in the last few days, so I am hoping all the trapped water and gas will disappear and give me a nice loss for the week.

 

[mimz]

hi nzmegs nice to hear youre doing well, sorry to hear about the form, i find it soooo annoying that when we are overweight, we are 'told' to lose weight and when we do start to lose it something or the other comes up, they should be happy that we are taking action and are not straining the nhs in the future, anyhoo small rant over!!! how long have you to go before you reach goal, hope it comes quick for you xxxxxxx

 

[nzmegs]

Hi Mimz. I still have 22 pounds to go to get to a BMI of less than 25. I suppose that is my goal. But really it is a clothing size of a 10/12 which I am aiming for.

I actually got to the meeting last night and had my BP taken by my counsellors nurse. So I am OK for another 4 weeks.

I am finally starting to see the scales fall again. I have cut out some of the saltier foods i was eating and I think that has made an improvement to the bloating. I also bought some peppermint tea which apparently helps with bloating too.

I am aiming for a good week. But we shall see. next weigh in next Tuesday morning.

 

[nzmegs]

I have a weigh in today. I am convinced I won't lose weight. in fact i might put on. I have stuck to the diet 100%, yet I don't feel smaller at all.

This makes three weeks in a row where the weight loss is small and just two weeks at the beginning where i had a decent weight loss. I just don't get it. How is it possible on 500 cals a day?

I have decided to ditch the bars for this coming week to see if the outcome improves. I need to see big weight losses or my motivation will dry up.

I might be wrong and come back today with a decent loss. But i really don't think so...

 

[nzmegs]

Aaaargh! What is wrong with me???

I have lost one measly pound this week to add to the one pound lost last week and the 2 from the week before and 1 from the week before that...

I swear I am sticking to the diet religiously, I am drinking around 2 litres of water a day, I walk for around 40-50 minutes every day. What am i doing wrong? Could i really be one of those people who have a metabolic disorder?

I still have another 20 pounds to lose so I don't think I am nearing my target.

This is really frustrating and quite upsetting. I feel like I am wasting my family's money.

The thing that really got to me today was that two of the people in my group had eaten sweets during the week and both of them lost 6 pounds.

I am perfect week after week and yet I seem to lose the same as I would on any other diet.

Has anyone else experienced these sorts of minor weight losses. I really feel different to everyone else and i can't put my finger on why this is happening.

In response I have decided to have no bars this week, to drink only water (no caffeine or broth) and to drink 3-4 litres of water daily. What else can I do? Any tips. Should I exercise?

 

[Debbi8489]

I dont think that 2 litres is enough megs, you really need to up it. It might be the bars, so it might be worthwhile dropping them just for this week to see how you go. Maybe concentrate on this for this week. Starting exercising can have an effect on your weight, so maybe leave that for another week or so. In any case, you are walking a lot. Are you using a pedometer to check your distances?

Stick at it chick...I know its hard and stay strong xx

 

[mimz]

hi nzmegs firstly sending you hugs, sorry to hear youre not losing more, its frustrating to say the least, i had a couple of weeks of losses of 2lbs, i then cut out the bars and lost 4.6lbs and then 5lbs the week after, i have always drank 2ltrs and still do, and it doesnt make any diff to me. everyones different, i would say cut out any extras like you said and up the water, i personally wouldnt exercise as this may get rid of fat but if you sts or put on this could be because muscle weighs more than fat, i would advise you to cut the extras and up the water and see if this helps, if not then maybe you could start exercise. hope some of that made sense, and goooooood luck!!! hope you have a massive loss next week xx

 

[nzmegs]

Thanks guys, it is always good to hear that other people experience the same thing. I just think that my body is very good at holding on to the weight. This is the exact reason my diets have failed in the past. I have a couple of good weeks then the losses slow and stop. Then I lose motivation and give up. this time I am sticking with it. Even if one pound a week is all I ever manage - I will still get there.

I have bought two 1.5 litre water bottles which i will aim to finish each day. When I am out walking I will take another small bottle with me. This will mean 3-4 litres a day.

Yesterday I drank about 3 litres - but by the evening I was so bloated with water I couldn't face my shake. I forced it down, but felt sick and kind of gross after. So slow and steady drinking all day is what i need to aim for.

I am also going to keep an eye on my weight at home to make sure what I am doing is enough.

Thanks for being so supportive. I really needed a boost. I am not giving up - but i really felt like I could have yesterday. But i made a promise to myself to stick at it no matter what and I am not reverting back to what I have always done - that never worked!

 

[Jane23]

Hi Nzmegs

You have nearly lost a stone in 4 weeks don't forget that bit xxx

 

[nzmegs]

Thanks Jane - you are right of course. I guess i just hoped that I would lose a stone every month. I compare myself to others too much and feel that I should match their weight losses. but everyone is different I suppose.

I have a weigh in tomorrow, so we will see what the outcome of my water regime has been. I feel like I have lost about 2 pounds. I am hoping for 3 though - ever hopeful

 

[Jane23]

Good luck on the weigh in x x

 

[nzmegs]

Back from my weigh in and I lost 3 pounds. I am much happier with that. I would love to lose the 5 or 6 pounds that other people do, but hey - not everyone is the same. I will attempt to drink even more water as i am sure it is this which made the difference.

I have also decided to have another week without the bars. I guess that if I can continue in this way I could be home free in about another 6 weeks. So this means I am officially half way there!

I need some sort of goal date in mind for maybe 8 weeks away. I will talk to my husband about arranging a meal out. (still staying within the plan of course!) Something worthwhile to look forward to.

 

[nzmegs]

We talked about crooked thoughts today. then on the way home, in fact within two minutes of leaving the meeting - I had a crooked thought...

I got a text from a good friend who told me well done for losing 3 pounds and that she could tell that I had done well this week.

My first thought (not my second or my third - but my first) was - "it isn't me who has done well, it is just the diet". I refused to give myself credit.

I immediately recognised this as a crooked thought and corrected it. I reminded myself that no one but me has stuck to eating LL food for 6 weeks, no one but me drinks copious amounts of water day after day, no one but me puts in extra walking time.

I am doing this diet - me, for me and by myself. No one is force feeding me, making me stick to it day after day. it is me that is doing all of that and the results are mine to cherish. And i should be proud of myself and i am!

I hope all of you who are doing so well are proud of yourselves too and don't forget to congratulate yourself. Don't wait for someone else to do it for you.

 

[sasababy]

wow nzmegs, well done so far on your total weight loss! Im going to be following your diary, because it has made me more motivated & made me realise even if i lose 1lb or 10lbs at least its weight coming off!