Rach's Weight Loss Diary
- Thread starter blackwidow
- Start date
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blackwidow
Gold Member
cheers everyone. been moping a bit. I am fat again, and still jobless. Was promised a debrief today but like everything else at that school, nothing gets followed up! Chased them up all day and still nothing 
blackwidow
Gold Member
still feel gutted and have all these ideas of why i wasnt good enough in my head and even though i know i tried my hardest its still really gutting when its not good enough.
and so of course I am mixed in the stressful spiral of comfort eating and am closing in fast on 16 stone again. Horrified at myself and yet I'm still eating. Just feeling really crap if I'm honest and want to crawl in a hole somewhere and never come out.
and so of course I am mixed in the stressful spiral of comfort eating and am closing in fast on 16 stone again. Horrified at myself and yet I'm still eating. Just feeling really crap if I'm honest and want to crawl in a hole somewhere and never come out.
mommyB
love it
Well for a start put down that biscuit/chocolate bar/burger/wilderbeast.
Sorry if i am not completely up to speed but was this your 1st interview ? if it was, from what i've seen when i've sat on interview panels at school, very few people get the 1st job they go for. That doesnt mean that it was a waste of time, its all valid experience for you.
It could also be that they havent got back to you cos they are up to their eyes in closing down for the easter holidays ( it was probably even unwise of them to hold them this close ). My best advice would be to give it another go after the hols.
I know sometimes our head has spoken to course tutors following interviews-does you college have someone who could poke them with a stick ?
End of the day its their loss. !!
Sorry if i am not completely up to speed but was this your 1st interview ? if it was, from what i've seen when i've sat on interview panels at school, very few people get the 1st job they go for. That doesnt mean that it was a waste of time, its all valid experience for you.
It could also be that they havent got back to you cos they are up to their eyes in closing down for the easter holidays ( it was probably even unwise of them to hold them this close ). My best advice would be to give it another go after the hols.
I know sometimes our head has spoken to course tutors following interviews-does you college have someone who could poke them with a stick ?
End of the day its their loss. !!
puggso_32
Right to the 'point'
I understand where you are coming from. The rejection felt by not getting a job feels like a personal insult on you and you begin to criticise every little part of your being in ways to find reason for not getting the job.
But it will be none of that, that is what you have to fight. Your own mind, a job will come along and all will be dandy, just these things can take their time.
And this is someone who spent 3.5 months on the dole after graduating.
But it will be none of that, that is what you have to fight. Your own mind, a job will come along and all will be dandy, just these things can take their time.
And this is someone who spent 3.5 months on the dole after graduating.
blackwidow
Gold Member
thanks everyone, really appreciate your support. Its easter and I have two weeks to remedy some of this blubber so determined to be good (apart from one day next week I am out for a late birthday meal with family)
my sleeping patterns have had me up since 5:45 cause usually i would be at work, so i've done all the washing up and put some towels in the washer, cuddled the cat for a bit and now i'm back off to bed
will walk out this morning sometime for some milk so i can have a decent breakfast!
my sleeping patterns have had me up since 5:45 cause usually i would be at work, so i've done all the washing up and put some towels in the washer, cuddled the cat for a bit and now i'm back off to bed
will walk out this morning sometime for some milk so i can have a decent breakfast!
Easter will give you time to focus Rach, both on the job front and weight. They may well not be back to you yet like Jane says. Our docs are always telling people they will do something in a day or so then I have to calm everyone down when it takes 2 weeks which is the actual realistic time scale. Don't get down, although thats easy to say I know it is self defeating. Come back stronger and fight on you will get a job
Take care
M
Take care
M
blackwidow
Gold Member
morning just tucked into my breakfast of cornflakes - i love having enough time to sit down and eat something rather than eating a cereal bar as I zoom along the motorway to work!
off to climbing, see you all later
Core:
B - cornflakes and milk (1)
L -
T -
S - grapes
just tucked into my breakfast of cornflakes - i love having enough time to sit down and eat something rather than eating a cereal bar as I zoom along the motorway to work! off to climbing, see you all later
Core:
B - cornflakes and milk (1)
L -
T -
S - grapes
Smirky
Gold Member
Sorry it's late but happy belated birthday! Hope everything is going well for you, chin up! Will find a job soon! Took me over a year, and now I've got a new job as just a before and after school play worker! but better than retail any day!! just got to keep applying! I only want enough experience to feel more confident before doing PGCE... but no one wants to give you the experience! it's gutting i know but hey at least we are better off than some people who don't even have food! let alone a job etc! xxx
just got to keep applying! I only want enough experience to feel more confident before doing PGCE... but no one wants to give you the experience! it's gutting i know but hey at least we are better off than some people who don't even have food! let alone a job etc! xxx
blackwidow
Gold Member
the bowl would probably be on Points around 4-5 points, but as I'm on Core, and I'm allowed skimmed milk, i pointed the extra as I had semi-skimmed (the annoyingness of corner shops - no red / soya milk! )
yesterdays food was as follows:
Core:
B - cornflakes and milk (1)
L - tuscan bean soup, 1/2 bread bun (1.5)
T - lean rump steak, boiled new potatoes, carrots, peas, tomato, mushrooms, followed by low fat yoghurt
S - s.f jelly (0)
total points for yesterday: 2.5
todays food:
B - bacon (fat removed), eggs (fried in 2tsp oil), mushrooms, spaghetti hoops and tomatoes with 2 slices of bread and l.f. margarine (4 - mum, i'm on a diet and you know i dont like my bread buttered.. so why do you butter it?!)
L - 5 bean chilli from wetherspoons (9.5)
T - chicken breast filled with e.l.f. philadelphia, sweetcorn, soya beans and jacket potato
S - diet pepsi (0)
cumulative points: 16
metro centre today was rammed. they had no tomato soup left at wethys, and they had no jacket potatoes left.. how mental is that?! so i racked my brains for the lowest point meal i could think of that might be vaguely core-friendly.. but will point it properly and be safe.
I've cooked up a beautiful chicken curry to have with brown rice for tea tomorrow, so tomorrows menu looks as follows:
B - cornflakes with soya light
L - carrot and coriander soup, ryvitas, e.l.f. philadelphia and cucumber
T - chicken curry w/ brown rice
S - pear, orange, grapes
I am amazed how much better I feel for almost 2 days worth of healthy eating. My skin is better, i dont feel so tired and moody and I just feel so much more positive.
I have it in my head that I'm going to wear a bikini on holiday this year. I am buying the bikini first, and then the holiday as I have to find someone to go with me
I shall of course post findings of bikinis for perusal later I would do it now, but have to watch biggest losers to clean off sky+ planner as pops is whinging and little bro Si has toss-pottedly put a password on his laptop to stop me using it. He's at work all day - how selfish is that?! I always look after his stuff and would never use his laptop if he needed it but he chooses to spend all day in his room, infront of his split-screen desktop and his 40-odd inch telly anyway! he cant possibly need his laptop too
)yesterdays food was as follows:
Core:
B - cornflakes and milk (1)
L - tuscan bean soup, 1/2 bread bun (1.5)
T - lean rump steak, boiled new potatoes, carrots, peas, tomato, mushrooms, followed by low fat yoghurt
S - s.f jelly (0)
total points for yesterday: 2.5
todays food:
B - bacon (fat removed), eggs (fried in 2tsp oil), mushrooms, spaghetti hoops and tomatoes with 2 slices of bread and l.f. margarine (4 - mum, i'm on a diet and you know i dont like my bread buttered.. so why do you butter it?!
)L - 5 bean chilli from wetherspoons (9.5)
T - chicken breast filled with e.l.f. philadelphia, sweetcorn, soya beans and jacket potato
S - diet pepsi (0)
cumulative points: 16
metro centre today was rammed. they had no tomato soup left at wethys, and they had no jacket potatoes left.. how mental is that?! so i racked my brains for the lowest point meal i could think of that might be vaguely core-friendly.. but will point it properly and be safe.
I've cooked up a beautiful chicken curry to have with brown rice for tea tomorrow, so tomorrows menu looks as follows:
B - cornflakes with soya light
L - carrot and coriander soup, ryvitas, e.l.f. philadelphia and cucumber
T - chicken curry w/ brown rice
S - pear, orange, grapes
I am amazed how much better I feel for almost 2 days worth of healthy eating. My skin is better, i dont feel so tired and moody and I just feel so much more positive.
I have it in my head that I'm going to wear a bikini on holiday this year. I am buying the bikini first, and then the holiday as I have to find someone to go with me
I shall of course post findings of bikinis for perusal later
I would do it now, but have to watch biggest losers to clean off sky+ planner as pops is whinging and little bro Si has toss-pottedly put a password on his laptop to stop me using it. He's at work all day - how selfish is that?! I always look after his stuff and would never use his laptop if he needed it but he chooses to spend all day in his room, infront of his split-screen desktop and his 40-odd inch telly anyway! he cant possibly need his laptop too 
charly.71
In the 10s at last!
What do you mean you need someone to go on holiday with you? Wheres matty in these holiday plans,is he not invited?
Im with you on the feeling cr*p,eating cr*p.
Ive done nothing but eat rubbish for about 2 weeks now & its making me feel very sluggish & headachy!
Monday or possibly tuesday is back to healthy methinks! xx
Im with you on the feeling cr*p,eating cr*p.
Ive done nothing but eat rubbish for about 2 weeks now & its making me feel very sluggish & headachy!
Monday or possibly tuesday is back to healthy methinks! xx
blackwidow
Gold Member
Mattys going on a man's holiday, and i fancy a girls holiday so need to talk some people into coming with me friends up here couldnt save enough to buy a chocolate bar, they're the most unrealistic spenders ever, so it'll have to be someone else
friends up here couldnt save enough to buy a chocolate bar, they're the most unrealistic spenders ever, so it'll have to be someone else - Status
