It was heavenly outside, wasn't it! I sat outside on the grass with my team eating leftover lasagne and it was amazing. Really perks you up ready for the afternoon ahead.
I work in marketing account management for the loyalty part of British Airways. I love it here and it's such a change from my last job (the job itself was fine but the company was a total and utter nightmare!). I really feel for you being under such pressure and as I said, I know exactly how you feel. I would be registering my CV with every agency in a 20 mile radius trying to escape!! I honestly would keep your eyes open hun - sounds like the place is really bad for you and I can't see it changing however hard you try. I know that sounds negative, but I've been there. You're a tough l'il cookie too though, and you seem to be coping really well. Just don't let it make you poorly - I ended up with every symptom of stress on the NHS website by the time I left my hell-hole.
I've been with the OH for 2 1/2 years - so not that long in the grand scheme of things, but we moved in together after just a few months - it has always just felt right. We knew each other through his sister so we weren't strangers before although I didn't know him well beforehand. It hasn't been completely plain sailing as my ex (of 7 years) was a total **** and left me with quite a few issues which I've projected at times onto poor Dave. I'm a bit of a control freak at times, which can't be easy to live with. I do feel like he's my soulmate though and we have the best time together. I'm so not ready to throw in the towel over one horrible night, however nasty it was.
xxx
Your really giving me the boost I need. I know you are totally right. I have to sort of break the day up in to little sections and find ways of getting through it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not being absolutely treated like crap but it's just the entire company. Exactly what you said. It's completely never going to change because the accountant who is here 6 years said it's getting worse rather than better. I'm the third person in this role in the past 3 years. The trend seems to be to stay for a year or a year and a half, and it seems as though I'll be feeding in to that too. I'm here exactly a year now. Leaving would be HORRIBLE because, as crazy as it sounds I actually left before and CAME BACK. I got an opportunity to work as a drama teacher in a creche and I was SO happy about it. I left here and it was a nasty experience where he was clearly so shocked and annoyed. Then I started the 'drama teacher job' (see where this is going) and it turned out to be a sham. The creche ended up being on national news in Ireland because of their poor childcare standards that has been discovered in an under cover investigation where things were filmed like staff cursing at children and all sorts of horrible things. It literally broke me. I came home crying every day. Eventually one Friday it just got too much and I never returned. I was unemployed for 4/5 days and applying for jobs here, there and everywhere. Eventually I realised that in comparison to the creche my old job wasn't so bad. I was worried about how I'd cope financially so on a whim I emailed my old boss (current one again) and explained what had happened. Miraculously he took me back (and more or less fired the girl he's hired to replace me, poor girl) so at the time I was SO happy and just felt so lucky. I've now been back 4 months and it's all come flooding back. I think eventually it will get worse than it was. I mean, I was always coming back with my tail between my legs but at the start I felt stronger and I was being sort of left alone to do my work. Now I am cleaning up messes that HE makes constantly and there is such a lack of structure in here. He changes the rules constantly and then doesn't remember changing them. It is SO disorganised and I can't cope with that.
An aside issue is that when I actually applied for the job it was an 'admin assistant' role. They had two jobs advertised and the other was telesales and sales. Iw would never have applied for that. I interviewed and he hired me but what he actually hired me for was sales. It was always disaster really. I'd never work in sales again. I just want out!
It's so hard to know what the right thing to do is, isn't it? Especially in a recession when your supposed to appreciate any job.
My degree is English and Philosophy and my masters is Drama and Performance Studies. random eh? Seems natural to go in to the performance industry/entertainment industry as my masters supports it. Hopefully it'll all work out.
2.5 years is long hun
OH (Peter, don't know why I go along with the whole OH thing, I'm just paranoid that this is public) are together 3.5 years. We moved in together in January. We've had our ups and down too (particularly recently over the whole Canada thing) but all in all we love eachother to pieces. When you say a 'horrible night' I can probably relate. We've had a few nasty rows! Unless he did something awful like hit you or cheat on you, I say all is forgiveable and hopefully this will be a wake up call for him for whatever part he played.
I am EXACTLY like you, total control freak. I too have baggage from my ex-boyfriend of 4 years. We were together from when I was 16-20 so all my formative years, end of school, most of college, and he ended up cheating on me when he went on holiday so I have huge issues around trust, abandonment and people lying to me. Makes me really paranoid. I have my moments but all in all I'm trying to be a better person and not let this relationship suffer over it.
When we met I was 20, carefree, funny and silly, easy-going. Now I can be very serious, a worrier, naggy and a control freak. Imagine that amplified by a million since we moved in together with the extra stuff like bills, house work, hormones etc. It's something I'm really thinking a lot about lately. A bit of nagging and negativity can turn in to regular arguements that eventually can turn in to huge ones where both parties are wrong, but it's interesting to look at where they all start. Unfortunately when I look deep, a lot of the time they start by me, and yet I HATE fighting. I'm learning a lot!
xxx
