starting now

[desireeanne]

yeah i gotta say my mum tells me the same lose it now before it becomes harder and the fact that she gives me what she calls her fat clothes dont feel great, i refuse to wear them lol
i have not told her about the xenical
it works for her and her partner but yeah it cost a lot of money and they also do the atkins diet which i noticed before there surgery they gained all the weight back in a short time
im very much a loner due to my bi polar and spend all my time in my room pretty much i know its not good but bad habits are a real bugger to break, i use to have anxiety but dont since i took myself off my meds

 

[Rachgleeson]

omg you sound quite like me, lol, my mum says the exact same to me and she has tried the same with her clothes aargghh thats something i really hate and it gets me down when she does it, it does get me down...to make it worse my sister tried giving me a couple of things which really P***** me off altogether!! The only people who know about me being on xenical so far is my husband and a close friend of mine ( and everyone on here of course). I couldnt stop my tablets i have tried and every time i do, my anxiety rises so i dont think its worth it. Maybe when i have lost the weight, and am feeling better about myself i might be able to get off them..

 

[desireeanne]

yeah some people can manage with out the tabs some cant for me i was on a anti psycotic ( quitiapine) and they made me very tired and lifeless
i went from being on 25mg to 300mg in a matter of weeks not great and i had my anti d's so i took myself off them and for months i have done really well have put myself back on the anti d's but double the strength as have a tendancy to let loose on shaun por guy does not know what hits him some days but am very lucky he is understanding ( we have not been together long)
and doc has given me the anti psycotic at lower doses so i can take what dosage i am happy with
as soon as i went off them the anxiety went but my ocd did come back
but thankfully its just mild and just makes me clean not so bad lol
yeah the whole mums clothes thing is just not cool, lol she has given up on buying me clothes as well cause the sit in the wardrobe or get given away

 

[Rachgleeson]

You really have been through it havent you!! It cant be easy, although i half know how your feeling!! My husband takes alot from me at times, i can be a right B**** lol... but we married for better and for worse!! I'm sure losing the weight will help us both to feel better eventually!! Sometimes i think ocd would be good for me to get the house tidy!! But seriously it must be hard for you, at least you are doing something to help yourself now!!

 

[desireeanne]

thanks
yeah my ocd is not so bad compared to most cases i just have a need to re arrange my house every few days.
i dont like it being the same lol weird i know but when i get the urge i can ignore it

 

[Rachgleeson]

I understand what your saying, i can only imagine!! Well i am off to bed before any cravings start lol. Night night and be good, hope your day goes well

 

[Rachgleeson]

hey des, How are you? Hope your ok!! x

 

[desireeanne]

hey im doing good just got home from the gym
got my official fitness plan and did it twice so feeling really good
and i get to see my honey today so yaye

how are you doing?

 

[Rachgleeson]

Wish i had the guts to get the gym but even if i did, i wouldnt be able get there Alls going ok with me so far, having a hungry day today but have stuck to it!! I think its great your getting so in to the gym!!

 

[desireeanne]

thanks
im sure you would be okay going to the gym but i know its not for everyone
i talk my flatmate into going with me because she has to drop me off anyway she comes and does it her self anyway
but i do really enjoy it

 

[Rachgleeson]

I know i would love it if i could get there, but at the moment i dont drive

 

[desireeanne]

is it far from your place?
am very very sore man my legs and tummy are in so much pain

 

[Rachgleeson]

Its about half an hour away, so makes it kind of awkward, your exercises must be working

 

[desireeanne]

oh okay yeah mine is just a 2 minute drive i will start walking later on and when noel dosent come with me

um yeah got my official excericse plan from my trainer yesterday and it consentrates on the tummy and leg and the stomach muscles are very sore as well as the legs plus afterwards at night i go swimming feel sorry for my poor pup hes a bit neglected and wants excercise too but by the time i get home i cant do anymore
am very happy though brought some new pants today looked at them thinking they wont fit me and they do so yaye my bum has shrunk lol
when do you go back to your doctor?

 

[Rachgleeson]

Wow thats great about the pants, that really shows this is working for you!! I see my doctor on monday kinda nervous but i am sure everything will be fine!!