Susie58- 2014 the year of my success
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Susie58
Gold Member
Oh dear. I'm feel famished !!. Belly is rumbling like thunder as well. Wondering if its because I ate those crisps I made from packs yesterday. Perhaps it was too good to be true. Felt so much like I was eating something proper!! Trying to stay away from the fridge & filling myself up with water & coffee. Have to dye my hair so will pop in the shower for a while & see if that helps. Really don't wont to crack on week 4. I have so much longer to do. :sigh2:
.Minnie
Full Member
Don't crack Susie - I can't tell you how upset, distraught and hideous I have felt this week for falling, gaining, bloating.. For nothing. It's not worth it. I would give my right arm to be on week 4, desperate to be there. stay there, you've worked hard and the weight is slipping off you! Nothing you can eat would be worth it I can promise you! Here I am back to day 1 and heavier than I started off. Don't do it 
Caught up your diary and well done! You've done so well, inspiring me and many x
Caught up your diary and well done! You've done so well, inspiring me and many x
Susie58
Gold Member
Thanks Minnie, Thanks Bee. I really am grateful for your support. I was walking backwards & forwards in front of the fridge like someone on a mission of self destruction. Cat & dog following close behind hoping for a treat. My middle son came home from work at just the right time & stopped me from opening the fridge door bless him. We do sometimes have a playful fight but usually at 2am in the morning when he comes home drunk after a night out, fighting over the fridge door is a first lol. Anyway feel a lot more in control of myself, just annoying how quickly the urge to eat happens. Still have a batch of crisps to eat so I will have them & see if it happens again afterwards x
BeeBeeSee
Gold Member
I'm glad you got rescued by your son, Susie Distraction is the key really, once you get your thoughts hooked on the idea of eating something, it becomes THE thing in your mind and nothing else seems to matter. A bubble that bursts rather quickly and painfully after the eating is done.
Distraction is the key really, once you get your thoughts hooked on the idea of eating something, it becomes THE thing in your mind and nothing else seems to matter. A bubble that bursts rather quickly and painfully after the eating is done.
Susie58
Gold Member
Absolutely Bee. I cant remember when this fixation of eating started. Never had problems when I was younger so there must be a reason for it ???
I can honestly say eating has never made me feel good so why do I still torment myself about it. The silly thing is I can go out socially & be happy not to eat. At home on my own is a totally different thing. I think I should maybe watch that programme about secret eaters. Avoided doing so when it was on but probably because it hit so close to home. Perhaps it will give some answers. x
I can honestly say eating has never made me feel good so why do I still torment myself about it. The silly thing is I can go out socially & be happy not to eat. At home on my own is a totally different thing. I think I should maybe watch that programme about secret eaters. Avoided doing so when it was on but probably because it hit so close to home. Perhaps it will give some answers. x
BeeBeeSee
Gold Member
I'm totally with you there Susie. I for once have had a problem with eating all my life, but it was always hidden and secret. It's an addiction I still battle and I view it as such, that I actually suffer from an addiction and am trying to recover from it. This is especially clear when I look frankly at the cunning ways I developed over years to hide food, like an addict would. I can happily forego food when I'm in the company of others. And I can be really controlled and strict with myself for periods of time but then the pressure sort of builds up with me and I feel like I absolutely have to eat and nothing else matters. I'm slowly getting to grips with it more now, how much my emotions and perceptions of situations lead me to eating and learn to distinguish between actual physical hunger and the addiction calling. Because hunger will be satisfied whereas the addition never will so it's a constant battle.
I have had therapy before and that has helped me a lot in terms of awareness of what things in my life have led to it and how I can cope better. Oof, Susie, I'm sorry, you probably never wanted to know all of this Spilling of beans over hehe.
I have had therapy before and that has helped me a lot in terms of awareness of what things in my life have led to it and how I can cope better. Oof, Susie, I'm sorry, you probably never wanted to know all of this
Spilling of beans over hehe.
Susie58
Gold Member
I'm totally with you there Susie. I for once have had a problem with eating all my life, but it was always hidden and secret. It's an addiction I still battle and I view it as such, that I actually suffer from an addiction and am trying to recover from it. This is especially clear when I look frankly at the cunning ways I developed over years to hide food, like an addict would. I can happily forego food when I'm in the company of others. And I can be really controlled and strict with myself for periods of time but then the pressure sort of builds up with me and I feel like I absolutely have to eat and nothing else matters. I'm slowly getting to grips with it more now, how much my emotions and perceptions of situations lead me to eating and learn to distinguish between actual physical hunger and the addiction calling. Because hunger will be satisfied whereas the addition never will so it's a constant battle.
I have had therapy before and that has helped me a lot in terms of awareness of what things in my life have led to it and how I can cope better. Oof, Susie, I'm sorry, you probably never wanted to know all of this
Bee of course I want to read about it & what makes us do the things that control our lives. I suppose the diary is a way of letting it all out
warts & all. We cant control our impulses unless we are honest & I think putting it down in black & white just helps highlight what those problems may be. Makes it more real somehow. I have always avoided writing a diary & maybe it was because I didn't want to admit there was a problem. Oh well its all out in the open now lol. So next stage is dealing it
Susie58
Gold Member
Well done for resisting susie!!
It does come on so fast sometimes it catches us off guard, you did well to get through it.
As others have said though, you would feel so bad for it afterwards and so disappointed ti be back at week 1 day 1!!
Stay strong
It certainly did creep up on me MM & there I was feeling confident that I'd cracked it. Just goes to show eh.X
x-Katie-x
Gold Member
Well done Susie for not giving in to it before your son came home, you'd already won a battle before he walked through the door - that's strength and determination! Also though well done to your son for fighting for what he knows you really want, which is to stay on track - you've got a good son there
Susie58
Gold Member
Well done Susie for not giving in to it before your son came home, you'd already won a battle before he walked through the door - that's strength and determination! Also though well done to your son for fighting for what he knows you really want, which is to stay on track - you've got a good son there
Thanks Katie, I am so glad I didn't give in but it was touch & go there for a while. It must be an off day cos my steps are awful today as well!! Tim will laugh he's head off if I tell him about being good. Today he was good bless him but he is the naughty one of the family (middle child syndrome ha ha). He's got a heart of gold though & he is also the funniest so makes me laugh even when he is being naughty lol x
twinkle82
Silver Member
This has got to be a week 4-5 thing! Maybe this is the time we all need to think about how to deal with the hungry times as surely whatever good choices we make now will help us when we've finished our journies. Keep strong lovey and glad your son is fighting with u over the fridge door lol xx
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Trying hard 2014
Gold Member
Keep up the good work Susie and stay strong x
Ht 5ft 1 Start wt 14st BMI 37. Wk 1 -1st 4lbs, BMI 33.6 Wk2...
xHt 5ft 1 Start wt 14st BMI 37. Wk 1 -1st 4lbs, BMI 33.6 Wk2...
Miss Mac
Gold Member
Funny enough in 2 previous good attempts i either had a night off or kinda fell off but both at the end of week 4!
Wonder if theres something in that!
I am still not safe in that respect yet so fingers crossed we can all plough on through!! Xx
Darcy15
I can and will do this!
Well done for resisting Susie!
Must be one of those days - I'm ravenous too and very nearly picked up the phone to order pizza
.....gave myself a good talking to and drank some more water, and the feeling has passed
I want to be slimmer MUCH more than I want pepperoni - need to keep telling myself that
Must be one of those days - I'm ravenous too and very nearly picked up the phone to order pizza
.....gave myself a good talking to and drank some more water, and the feeling has passed
I want to be slimmer MUCH more than I want pepperoni - need to keep telling myself that
Susie58
Gold Member
I think you are right Twinkle. At some point when we start eating normally we are still going to get the urge to eat more. I'm going to take today as part of a learning curve on how important it is to deal with these sort of difficulties. If I cant do it now how will I be able to deal with it when normal food is an everyday thing?
Susie58
Gold Member
MM I think recognising that we are not out of the woods is a big step in the right direction. I'll be better prepared the next time it happens x
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