TBSx LL Journey...

[LadyT]

Okay, gave a bit of thought about the mouth comment ....again.

Some man loving? PSHAW!!! You need a BOB!
Battery Operated Boyfriend.
Clean, reliable and accessible at YOUR convenience.

Now I know what you are thinking and SHAME on you all
MASSAGING THE SHOULDERS ladies!!!! I task that very few men can do effectively and seldom do without moaning.

xx

Omg I am actually shoulder shaking ( in case anyone doesn't understand that concept it is when you laugh that much your shoulders shake too)

BOB sounds fun, every girl needs one lol

Webs you could actually be my secret girl crush you are the funniest person ever! A girl crush in case anyone is wondering is someone you look up to and aspire to be like!! Xx

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[weebles]

LOL,
Wasn't sure if my post was apropo or not. Figured what the heck...if anyone is offended then tough. It can always be deleted anyways.

You have different sayings over here to what we have back home. I speak at work to friends about my 'girl friend' back home. Everyone looks at me in wonder if i am....well...you know.
In actual fact she IS a friend and IS a girl that I have known for over 40 years! We grew up together and remain best of friends. Peeps like that we consider to be girl friends and not in any sexual way.
Secret crush is COOL! I am honoured that you would think of me that way.
Tonight I am not too inspiring for anyone - I wobbled earlier. Oh well...tomorrow is another day.
Time for a new me to emerge on Sunday, and I am NERVOUS!

Hope you are having fun!!

xx

 

[sexychick]

You go girl!

Hope you have a really good night out,bet you look stunning Hun!
Sexy xx

 

[Gembritney]

Thanks lovely. The fun is in the getting ready I can't wait xx

Oooo so have you got your outfit ready xx

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i have my leggins and shoes so far hehe x

 

[LadyT]

LOL,
Wasn't sure if my post was apropo or not. Figured what the heck...if anyone is offended then tough. It can always be deleted anyways.

You have different sayings over here to what we have back home. I speak at work to friends about my 'girl friend' back home. Everyone looks at me in wonder if i am....well...you know.
In actual fact she IS a friend and IS a girl that I have known for over 40 years! We grew up together and remain best of friends. Peeps like that we consider to be girl friends and not in any sexual way.
Secret crush is COOL! I am honoured that you would think of me that way.
Tonight I am not too inspiring for anyone - I wobbled earlier. Oh well...tomorrow is another day.
Time for a new me to emerge on Sunday, and I am NERVOUS!

Hope you are having fun!!

xx

Ha ha weebs I am bit sure where the sayings come from to be honest but they make smile.

For anyone reading the girl crush comment, I would like to clarify that I am not into women just hot men!! Lol

Aw hope tomorrow or today now actually is a better day for you xx

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[LadyT]

Feeling really low today, I know I shouldn't!

I felt so good last night in my outfit and made the effort to look fairly acceptable! Thinking about some if the comments made about my weightloss, about the blood problems and general mocking has left me feeling lower than I have for sometime!

It was clear conversations had taken place about how much I had lost, the plan itself and the fact that the issue with my blood. I have played down the blood thing on here because i don't wanna accept the possible outcomes. My friends however felt the need to tell me what I was facing, if I dont take care I'd myself, like I didn't know.

Throughout the night there was a number of comments that made feel like I was being mocked and things said to others that we didn't even know about how much weight I had lost. I actually pulled my best mate to one side and said you have done nothing but take the p all night, she then said I'm sorry you look amazing and I am jealous you are slimmer than me. She tried To get me to stop now, i told her i would be Watching the loss carefully and stop as and when i felt comfortable!! She wad drunk and has had a tough time if late but the comments really hurt. She of all people knew how depressed I was before LL.


I worked hard to lose this weight and want to feel proud the reality is that it's now scaring me. I know some if you have the same concerns and i genuinely never believed I would gave these thoughts and feelings bur they have crept up on me. My body has changed shape most it it I adore, the scary thing for me is that I have always had big boobs now they seem to be reducing in size and not looking to great out of my bra, I can cope as they are now but if I lose more weight and they empty so to speak I am not sure I will see the benefits in the loss of weight versus the feeling if contentment with my body. I know I am still over weight but I'm struggling with this now, I won't give up but need to re evaluate as I go along now and also really consider if surgery is an option in the future, that scares me too if I am honest and that's a whole different conversationxx

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[sexychick]

Stay strong!

Arr Hun you were so looking forward to you night out too! Bet you feel even worse now than when you were bigger.:cry:
I now it's hard to ignore the comments but envy can put a nasty streak in people,at the end of the day your doing it for you not them,you know that anyway,try to stay strong and just see how you feel and look(about the boobs!)further down the line.You will feel proud again,because you've done fantastic hun!
How about seeing how you are with each 7 lbs you loose towards your goal,just a suggestion!
Come on chin up,I know your hurting but think positive again,you can do it,you've not got that long left before you go on RTM!

Sexy xx

 

[weebles]

Feeling really low today, I know I shouldn't!

I felt so good last night in my outfit and made the effort to look fairly acceptable! Thinking about some if the comments made about my weightloss, about the blood problems and general mocking has left me feeling lower than I have for sometime!

It was clear conversations had taken place about how much I had lost, the plan itself and the fact that the issue with my blood. I have played down the blood thing on here because i don't wanna accept the possible outcomes. My friends however felt the need to tell me what I was facing, if I dont take care I'd myself, like I didn't know.

Throughout the night there was a number of comments that made feel like I was being mocked and things said to others that we didn't even know about how much weight I had lost. I actually pulled my best mate to one side and said you have done nothing but take the p all night, she then said I'm sorry you look amazing and I am jealous you are slimmer than me. She tried To get me to stop now, i told her i would be Watching the loss carefully and stop as and when i felt comfortable!! She wad drunk and has had a tough time if late but the comments really hurt. She of all people knew how depressed I was before LL.


I worked hard to lose this weight and want to feel proud the reality is that it's now scaring me. I know some if you have the same concerns and i genuinely never believed I would gave these thoughts and feelings bur they have crept up on me. My body has changed shape most it it I adore, the scary thing for me is that I have always had big boobs now they seem to be reducing in size and not looking to great out of my bra, I can cope as they are now but if I lose more weight and they empty so to speak I am not sure I will see the benefits in the loss of weight versus the feeling if contentment with my body. I know I am still over weight but I'm struggling with this now, I won't give up but need to re evaluate as I go along now and also really consider if surgery is an option in the future, that scares me too if I am honest and that's a whole different conversationxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

Shame you feel so low today.
Women can be cruel, mean, and just down right nasty (hands up to that on my part in the past). jealousy...pure jealousy is all. You are getting more attention than them and are the focal point of the evening. As the drinks flowed - so did the calibre of comments.
You probably did look fantastic and had high hopes that everyone there would be thrilled and supportive of your acheivements - alas not the case. THey didn't want you to feel GOOD as they probably felt insercure around you.
Screw them and the horse they rode in on. What is important as how you felt going and how you feel knowing how much weight you have lost thus far. Are you proud of yourself and what you have done? YES!!! We all are proud of you.

This blood thing. I imagine by now all of us have googled what it is out of concern including yourself. You know the risks - it isn't up to us on here to tell you anymore or any less. That is your own personal thing and you will make the choice when to stop losing more weight and learn to manage (RTM).

The boob situation...hmmm. Can't offer any words of wisdom on that as I am in the same situation. For me...my boobs are not part of who I am. I was identified by them in the past but that is not who or what I am all about. I am finding deeper levels of myself, just as you are now.

Bottom line....don't let one night of alleged friends comments hurt you. Friends don't do that to one another - true friends that is.
Evaluate if you chose to on your goals and have the goals realistic, manageable and a plan to achieve in place.

You are worth so much - remember that

xx

 

[weebles]

This is where SB usually enters and gives the sound advice. She is wise on this stuff.
Hope she gets here soon!

xx

 

[HannahNewton]

Mix of jealousy & alcohol - not good!!

Do what is right for you LadyT with the support of your LLC, GP & us

When your glycogen returns your curves will fill out a bit. Including your boobs.

Had the opposite comment last week whilst passing my RFL sponsorship form around my office.

Q: "How do you run with your big boobs?"

A: "2 bras! Thanks also to Lycra!! - a girl has got to protect her assets!!"

Smiled & moved on to next desk with a flick of my hair.

My sister has also had a dig about LL this week - "I thought you were only doing it for a month to lose what you put back on - your tiny you don't need to lose any more..."

I read this as you are leaner than me now and I don't have your willpower.

Hope you feel brighter now and can put last night behind you. Xx

 

[slendablenda]

Chins up hun

Ding -
Maybe not words of wisdom and words of recognition of the pain you are feeling lovely sexy gorgeous strong woman Lady T. xx
Word of the moment seems to be FRENEMIES.
I too had problems with a couple of my friends I'd known for about 20 years. After I'd lost 12 stone - THEY couldn't handle it. I was okay as a fat friend (funny, pretty face, witty, supportive, life and soul, food expert, excellent cook etc, etc.)
I'm sure you know what I mean - but as soon as I became slim as well -I became a threat - big time.
I was a bit like you, excited and proud wanting to show them the new me, the result of a year's self denial, abstinence, no alcohol, strong will, waited for the positive strokes - nada!
What I forgot was that I had the CBT and the group support from the likes of Blonde Logic and my fab LLC. I'd had the opportunity to start getting my head round it - they were presented with the end product. was I the plump earth mother like on Darling Buds of May - or was I suddenly a Sex Siren????
They didn't know - neither did I.
We were all confused. They were jealous, I was hurt. We all felt
disappointed. So the new me eventually took the bull by the horns after going through the "sod it" "they don't deserve me"etc. I asked each of them separately why they were reacting like that. One said she didn't know what I meant ,so we left it. I didn't call her. After about 4 months she phoned and gradually we have picked up our friendship. I know it wasn't my problem.
The other friend was very honest and told me how unsettled she felt seeing the re-invented me, said it was like seeing the clock turn back for me 20 years and realising how quickly her clock was moving forward. I'd never thought of that.
One thing I learnt from the experience was that other people don't necessarily see things the same way as we do. They have their vulnerabilities and insecurities just as we do. They are just diffferent. It makes people feel uncomfortable to see someone else actually taking control and making changes to their life.

The health condition thing struck a chord with me too. There are always several ways of looking at things.Now I've got breast cancer I've had different reactions.
Someone said, "what a waste of time losing all that weight" another one "do you think you wouldn't have got breast cancer if you were still fat?" another one "I've read that doing LL can kill you"
The way I see it is completely different - Thank God I did lose the weight. My boobs used to walk through the door before I arrived - how would I have found the lump? If I had it would probably have been too late. Also I am fit and healthy now, giving me the best chance of beating this.
If I was still over 21 stone how would my body have taken 2 general anaesthetics in 12 hours and all the rest of the treatment still to come? Would the NHS have had enough chemo in stock for me?
So, try to stay strong hun. You be proud. Glass more than half full my lovely. Remember those positive feelings, you can ride again, you KNOW look lovely, so do they. You are lovely - inside and out. xxx
Sorry to go on and on, Weebles is right -your pain struck me.
Keep reminding yourself why you decided to do LL and how you felt before.
As my LLC would say "Let your so called friends build a bridge and get over themselves".

 

[bb13]

I am reading through the diaries, one by one, and have just read yours Lady T; it made me laugh, cry, empathise and nod my head in agreement at so many things. Well done you - don't let anyone take the shine off your wonderful achievements!

BB

 

[weebles]

SB to the rescue. Always puts things into perspective and always admired.

Hope you are reading this our Lovely Lady T. We all care about you.
xx

 

[LadyT]

Arr Hun you were so looking forward to you night out too! Bet you feel even worse now than when you were bigger.:cry:
I now it's hard to ignore the comments but envy can put a nasty streak in people,at the end of the day your doing it for you not them,you know that anyway,try to stay strong and just see how you feel and look(about the boobs!)further down the line.You will feel proud again,because you've done fantastic hun!
How about seeing how you are with each 7 lbs you loose towards your goal,just a suggestion!
Come on chin up,I know your hurting but think positive again,you can do it,you've not got that long left before you go on RTM!

Sexy xx

Hi, I was reallly looking forward to it and to be fair i didnt think too much about the comments until I woke this morning. It was a good night.

I think thats a good idea about monitoring it half a stone at the time, I will do that thanks hun xx

 

[LadyT]

Shame you feel so low today.
Women can be cruel, mean, and just down right nasty (hands up to that on my part in the past). jealousy...pure jealousy is all. You are getting more attention than them and are the focal point of the evening. As the drinks flowed - so did the calibre of comments.
You probably did look fantastic and had high hopes that everyone there would be thrilled and supportive of your acheivements - alas not the case. THey didn't want you to feel GOOD as they probably felt insercure around you.
Screw them and the horse they rode in on. What is important as how you felt going and how you feel knowing how much weight you have lost thus far. Are you proud of yourself and what you have done? YES!!! We all are proud of you.

This blood thing. I imagine by now all of us have googled what it is out of concern including yourself. You know the risks - it isn't up to us on here to tell you anymore or any less. That is your own personal thing and you will make the choice when to stop losing more weight and learn to manage (RTM).

The boob situation...hmmm. Can't offer any words of wisdom on that as I am in the same situation. For me...my boobs are not part of who I am. I was identified by them in the past but that is not who or what I am all about. I am finding deeper levels of myself, just as you are now.

Bottom line....don't let one night of alleged friends comments hurt you. Friends don't do that to one another - true friends that is.
Evaluate if you chose to on your goals and have the goals realistic, manageable and a plan to achieve in place.

You are worth so much - remember that

xx

Thanks Weebs, I just find it a struggle sometimes, I am so supportive to my friends and would drop everything to be ther for them. My best friend and I have been through so much and she knows how I have ben ovr my weight prior to this and the tears I shed and the depression that set in and yet I dont always feel that I get 100% back, Maybe thats me etting my expectations too high, not sure.

As for the blood, it scared the cr@p out me when i started googling so I stopped. I know the consequences and I am hoping that Lite is working its magic for me now.I need to get more tests done again but think I may have to accept that Lite will be the way forward for me now.

As for the boobs, going to keep a close eye on them. I have been thinking about it today and to be honest I am happy with them in a bra its just out of one that its not too great but to be fair I have never been that fond out of a bra, so maybe I am making a big deal over nothing. Total drama queen arent i lol

Thanks for your kind words meant alot xx

 

[LadyT]

Mix of jealousy & alcohol - not good!!

Do what is right for you LadyT with the support of your LLC, GP & us

When your glycogen returns your curves will fill out a bit. Including your boobs.

Had the opposite comment last week whilst passing my RFL sponsorship form around my office.

Q: "How do you run with your big boobs?"

A: "2 bras! Thanks also to Lycra!! - a girl has got to protect her assets!!"

Smiled & moved on to next desk with a flick of my hair.

My sister has also had a dig about LL this week - "I thought you were only doing it for a month to lose what you put back on - your tiny you don't need to lose any more..."

I read this as you are leaner than me now and I don't have your willpower.

Hope you feel brighter now and can put last night behind you. Xx

Hi hun, thanks for the kind words they helped.

Good news about the glycogen improving my shape in time.

Its so unfair that we have all put our lives practically on hold with regards to food and worked flippin hard to lose the weight and yet people feel the need to pass comment. xx

 

[LadyT]

Ding -
Maybe not words of wisdom and words of recognition of the pain you are feeling lovely sexy gorgeous strong woman Lady T. xx
Word of the moment seems to be FRENEMIES.
I too had problems with a couple of my friends I'd known for about 20 years. After I'd lost 12 stone - THEY couldn't handle it. I was okay as a fat friend (funny, pretty face, witty, supportive, life and soul, food expert, excellent cook etc, etc.)
I'm sure you know what I mean - but as soon as I became slim as well -I became a threat - big time.
I was a bit like you, excited and proud wanting to show them the new me, the result of a year's self denial, abstinence, no alcohol, strong will, waited for the positive strokes - nada!
What I forgot was that I had the CBT and the group support from the likes of Blonde Logic and my fab LLC. I'd had the opportunity to start getting my head round it - they were presented with the end product. was I the plump earth mother like on Darling Buds of May - or was I suddenly a Sex Siren????
They didn't know - neither did I.
We were all confused. They were jealous, I was hurt. We all felt
disappointed. So the new me eventually took the bull by the horns after going through the "sod it" "they don't deserve me"etc. I asked each of them separately why they were reacting like that. One said she didn't know what I meant ,so we left it. I didn't call her. After about 4 months she phoned and gradually we have picked up our friendship. I know it wasn't my problem.
The other friend was very honest and told me how unsettled she felt seeing the re-invented me, said it was like seeing the clock turn back for me 20 years and realising how quickly her clock was moving forward. I'd never thought of that.
One thing I learnt from the experience was that other people don't necessarily see things the same way as we do. They have their vulnerabilities and insecurities just as we do. They are just diffferent. It makes people feel uncomfortable to see someone else actually taking control and making changes to their life.

The health condition thing struck a chord with me too. There are always several ways of looking at things.Now I've got breast cancer I've had different reactions.
Someone said, "what a waste of time losing all that weight" another one "do you think you wouldn't have got breast cancer if you were still fat?" another one "I've read that doing LL can kill you"
The way I see it is completely different - Thank God I did lose the weight. My boobs used to walk through the door before I arrived - how would I have found the lump? If I had it would probably have been too late. Also I am fit and healthy now, giving me the best chance of beating this.
If I was still over 21 stone how would my body have taken 2 general anaesthetics in 12 hours and all the rest of the treatment still to come? Would the NHS have had enough chemo in stock for me?
So, try to stay strong hun. You be proud. Glass more than half full my lovely. Remember those positive feelings, you can ride again, you KNOW look lovely, so do they. You are lovely - inside and out. xxx
Sorry to go on and on, Weebles is right -your pain struck me.
Keep reminding yourself why you decided to do LL and how you felt before.
As my LLC would say "Let your so called friends build a bridge and get over themselves".

Aw hunny, I feel so pants making a big deal about things when the reality is that others, like yourselves are facing much bigger demons in life. I really hope you are on the mend and the pain levels are minimal for you. You are an amazing woman and so inspirational to so many of us. xx

Frenemies are dangerous at times! I was tempted to confront my best friend but I am not sure it would achieve anything at the moment. I think in time I will though!

You are so right about how you view the fact you have lost weight in relation to your breast cancer (feels so wrong to have to type those words, sorry) I think if anything it will stand you in good stead and give you the energy to fight and win this battle for sure.

Love and hugs & thank you so much xxxxx

 

[LadyT]

I am reading through the diaries, one by one, and have just read yours Lady T; it made me laugh, cry, empathise and nod my head in agreement at so many things. Well done you - don't let anyone take the shine off your wonderful achievements!

BB

Hi, thanks so much for taking time to comment, I do appreciate it. I guess I have been on a bit of a roller coaster over the past few months really but feel so much healthier, happier and full of energy now, so it is all worth it. xx

 

[LadyT]

Hey my lovelies, thank you all so much for taking the time to offer some words of advice, inspriation and comfort they really are much appreciated. I dont know what I would do without you guys offering the support you do.

So today has been a strange day as you know, I have no appetite at all and so I am going to have just shakes, I know you all probably think thats the wrong thing to do but I am feeling all over the place at the moment. I have had my shakes though and I am desperately trying to get some water in me, this week has been dreadful for the water intake so I am not expecting a great weightloss if any, thats ok though I am not stressing over it!!

I am away with work for the next few days so I will be back just in time for my weigh in.

Day consisted of me mucking out, then riding Chester who was very well behaved after we got over the first five minutes of him using me as a plaything! Basically I stood him next to the mounting block as I cant get on from the ground, he is too big and I am not that flexible!! Everytime I got on the block he moved a couple of inches, this went on for as I say about five minutes until I got so mad a gave him what for, in a nice way though. It was like something out of a carry on film lol.

I then came home and cleaned like a mad woman! I think it was a way of keeping my mind busy!

I'm just about to catch up on all your diaries. Thanks again ladies, I am going to push the comments and the negative thoughts to the back of my mind and focus on the positives. I do remember walking towards my friends house last night, the front door was open and hearing the one lad who came out saying OMG she looks amazing! He gave me a big hug and a kiss when I got to the front door so that was nice.

Oh forgot to mention as well I wore my jumpsuit that I bought a couple of weeks ago and managed to catch my heel in it whilst going up the stairs and ripped a hole in the leg, hey ho these things happen! I am going to cut the legs off and make it into a playsuit instead now.

Have a great evening my lovelies xxxxxxx

 

[alighterlife]

Hey sweetie, I'm still rather new here and finally stumbled across your blog thingy. Firstly you are just GREAT! You have offered me loads of valuable advice, your loss is inspiration. So, in this short while you have become invaluable to me

I am so sorry you had such a negative time, people are strange, I was even thinking last night that LL should offer a one counciling sesh for partners/and at least one close friend because its gonna be a big change for them.
Can you sit them down in a non hostile enviroment, no partying, no alchol, just you and them, bring your before clothes/pics etc and show them the amazing woman you become (not that you wasnt before but you catch my drift lol) answer any questions and to tell them exactly how you feel.

I don't understand this 'blood thing' is it something I should look out for? Hope i'm not being intrusive!

lol@ your jumpsuit, I burnt a hole in my lovely dress so I know that feeling!

Hope you away with work goes well and not too stressful!

Lots of luf and weightloss dust your way ********x