The beginning of the end of my life of fatness

[piglet74]

Ok so here goes, I thought id start a diary so that I can jot down my thoughts along my journey towards slimdom!

So I have been here many times before but enough is enough I need to stop this destructive behaviour.

I first did the Cambridge diet a couple of years ago and lost about 4 stones over 12 weeks but before I got to my goal (less than 1 stone away!!) I self sabotaged and fell of it spectacularly and not surprisingly did I regain all that I had lost.
I did have a few attempts of getting back with it but I never lasted more than a few weeks. Over the last year, life has been very hectic with me completing my university course and working as a newly qualified midwife has been far from easy and I know find myself being even bigger than when I first started :cry:.

It is affecting so many areas of my life, I never want to go out and enjoy myself as I feel self conscious and never have anything to wear. I feel uncomfortable in new situations as I feel that people are looking at me and judging me. Not to mention my relationship with my long suffering husband, he is absolutely fed up with hearing about my diets and me stopping and starting, life is simple in his mind, if you don’t like the way you look then don’t eat as much!
I also want to enjoy our relationship again with out feeling absolutely horrid every time we are intimate!

So I have decided that once and for all I will not watch my life roll by any longer, I can do this and I will succeed with reaching my goals. I met with my diet lady today and weighed in at a horrid 16.6 and a BMI of 38.3 .
Well I’ll NEVER see them numbers again, onwards and upwards and all that jazz!

My first day of me new life starts tomorrow.

 

[Emmaline]

Hi Piglet, Well, it's never too late to get to grips with the things that you really need to do and I am soo glad that you have decided to do just that!!

I well know the feeling of being uncomfortable around others and awkward when going out to social functions so doing something about it has got to be a big bonus.

Do hope you can stick to it this time round and then take control when you have gotten to your goal as I am sure you will.

Take care and all the very best to you....

 

[RainbowRose]

hello and welcome along

I can relate to everything you said...and more :sigh:

but we are going to do this, and nothing is going to stop us reaching our goal...right?

Congratulations on qualifying as a midwife, such a rewarding job, well done!

I look forward to chatting with you along the way

 

[piglet74]

Thank you girls for your encouraging words:grouphugg:
I have now officially started and had my first milkshake of the day and about 500mls of my water so feeling very positive. I know that i can loose the weight so i just need to stay focused on where i want to be in life and i deserve to look and feel the best that i can so i need to stop selling myself short!
I'll busy myself today with sorting out the diet admin such as measurments and before pictures etc so that should keep my motivation on track and tomorrow im working for 13.5 h so will have no time to feel sorry for myself so thats the first two days sorted
xxx

 

[MaisieMoodle]

Wishing you lots & lots of luck on your journey and look forward to reading about your progress. I've said it before on here, I take my hat off to anyone who can do a VLCD, you must have willpower of solid steel!

 

[piglet74]

Hi there
I think that in many ways I have needed more willpower when I have been dong WW in the past as you still have to buy and eat food but be trusted to make good choices ( abit extreme but imagine telling a heroin addict that he cant have any drugs but he needs to continue handling it!) .
This way food is out of the question for a while so there is no even considering it and having to rely on my ability to make good judgements, as clearly that is not one of my strong points. Also Ketosis helps as you wont feel as hungry.
I think that what also helped me the last time I did CD is that you loose weight so fast which really spurs you on, in 6 weeks i had lost 2 and a half stone compared to WW I would have been looking at 10-12 lbs in the same time. BUT healthy eating is where im aiming for long term obviously, plan is to stick to CD for 12 weeks including working up the plans and the finish up the last bit with WW and exercise .
xx

 

[piglet74]

Whoop whoop day 2 completed
Not feeling to bad tbh, a bit headachy in the afternoon but considering i have been waorking flat out for over 13 hours (my pedometer clocked up 12,000 steps!) i was holding up ok i thought.

 

[RainbowRose]

Drink lots of water, dehydration causes bad headaches in the early days of dieting ....talking from experience

have a great day!

 

[piglet74]

I'm now on day 6 and still doing 100% SS, most of the time im feeling great that i'm finally doing something about my weight but I keep getting that niggely little feeling that it WILL TAKE FOREVER to get anywhere near a weight where i feel more comfortable!!
I know that I shouldnt focus to much on the big picture rather getting through each day but its really hard today and i'm feeling a tad sorry for myself :wave_cry:
It hasnt helped that its my husbands birthday today which has involved loads of yummy food and cake for everybody BUT me...
On a positive note i weighed myself this morning and am down 2.2Kg's about 4.5lbs

 

[RainbowRose]

Congratulations on your loss, that is fantastic You are doing so well. and I can relate to the daunting feeling of the weight I need to lose, but I break it down to smaller goals and not think of the road ahead too much
You will come across all sorts of events when temptation is all around, it isn't nice to feel you are missing out on all the goodies I know but try to choose something that won't make too much of dent in your new lifestyle, or have very little of something yummy to ease the craving..but the very next day, climb right back on board and go for it!

The constant denial and refusing something you would normally love is hard to adjust to, but you will be so happy that you did when the scales are kind to you on next weigh in

Try not to get disheartened, I felt a bit like that last week for no sensible reason, just wanted to be instantly slim I suppose ..but I pulled myself out of the mood and remembered why I was doing it in the first place.

Good luck, hope you have a good day tomorrow