The story of happyhealthy's expedition to maintain!

You certainly have a lot on your plate HH. I'm afraid you do really need to talk to b/f, as hard as it will be. You need to know where you stand, especially with exams rounds the corner. I really hope it's works out for you, he seems a lovely guy x
 
Luuuuuucy I'm here!! I've finally caught up! I think everyone's pretty much said everything re: the boy so all I'm going to say is, talk to him. For all you know he's thinking the same thing. 70 miles isn't REALLY that far like Tina said, it wouldn't be the end of the world and it's doable. I just think that obviously, if you carry things on, you'll both have to accept that the nature of his course means that you can't see each other every weekend or maybe even every other weekend, but doesn't mean that you can't stay together, see each other when you can and that it can't work out. I know people who have done it so I know it's possible! And good luck with the exams, though I know you don't really need it Miss Brainbox!!

Well I'm not too far off Mr Fionat29. For some reason, I've just started to think of Fiona as in Princess Fiona and Mr Fiona as in Shrek, so I shall from now on call him Shrek and hope no offence is taken! haha I'm almost 25 and I've not really had a proper relationship at all. I've kinda seen a few guys, probably slept with more guys than I should have (though can I point out here I'm not a slut, it's not a new guy every week whose name I can't remember, I can name them all!!) but not ever really been official with anyone. There's been a few times I've come kinda close. Most people who ever showed an interest in me when I was younger I just pretty much ignored thinking they were taking the p*** or something. Even now when someone shows an interest, I don't much believe it or don't expect it to last long. There haven't really been that many people who have been really interested in me, but the few that have I guess I've pretty much pushed away, though not all. Some, like top tosser and another guy last year, I was all for going ahead with and it didn't really end due to my decision. So yeah, I'll probably be a Shrek and still have no proper relationship when I'm 32 at this rate!!
 
caroline g said:
Luuuuuucy I'm here!! I've finally caught up! I think everyone's pretty much said everything re: the boy so all I'm going to say is, talk to him. For all you know he's thinking the same thing. 70 miles isn't REALLY that far like Tina said, it wouldn't be the end of the world and it's doable. I just think that obviously, if you carry things on, you'll both have to accept that the nature of his course means that you can't see each other every weekend or maybe even every other weekend, but doesn't mean that you can't stay together, see each other when you can and that it can't work out. I know people who have done it so I know it's possible! And good luck with the exams, though I know you don't really need it Miss Brainbox!!

Well I'm not too far off Mr Fionat29. For some reason, I've just started to think of Fiona as in Princess Fiona and Mr Fiona as in Shrek, so I shall from now on call him Shrek and hope no offence is taken! haha I'm almost 25 and I've not really had a proper relationship at all. I've kinda seen a few guys, probably slept with more guys than I should have (though can I point out here I'm not a slut, it's not a new guy every week whose name I can't remember, I can name them all!!) but not ever really been official with anyone. There's been a few times I've come kinda close. Most people who ever showed an interest in me when I was younger I just pretty much ignored thinking they were taking the p*** or something. Even now when someone shows an interest, I don't much believe it or don't expect it to last long. There haven't really been that many people who have been really interested in me, but the few that have I guess I've pretty much pushed away, though not all. Some, like top tosser and another guy last year, I was all for going ahead with and it didn't really end due to my decision. So yeah, I'll probably be a Shrek and still have no proper relationship when I'm 32 at this rate!!
Click to expand...

Lmao and ROFL!! Shrek! That's his new nickname!
 
caroline g said:
Luuuuuucy I'm here!! I've finally caught up! I think everyone's pretty much said everything re: the boy so all I'm going to say is, talk to him. For all you know he's thinking the same thing. 70 miles isn't REALLY that far like Tina said, it wouldn't be the end of the world and it's doable. I just think that obviously, if you carry things on, you'll both have to accept that the nature of his course means that you can't see each other every weekend or maybe even every other weekend, but doesn't mean that you can't stay together, see each other when you can and that it can't work out. I know people who have done it so I know it's possible! And good luck with the exams, though I know you don't really need it Miss Brainbox!!

Well I'm not too far off Mr Fionat29. For some reason, I've just started to think of Fiona as in Princess Fiona and Mr Fiona as in Shrek, so I shall from now on call him Shrek and hope no offence is taken! haha I'm almost 25 and I've not really had a proper relationship at all. I've kinda seen a few guys, probably slept with more guys than I should have (though can I point out here I'm not a slut, it's not a new guy every week whose name I can't remember, I can name them all!!) but not ever really been official with anyone. There's been a few times I've come kinda close. Most people who ever showed an interest in me when I was younger I just pretty much ignored thinking they were taking the p*** or something. Even now when someone shows an interest, I don't much believe it or don't expect it to last long. There haven't really been that many people who have been really interested in me, but the few that have I guess I've pretty much pushed away, though not all. Some, like top tosser and another guy last year, I was all for going ahead with and it didn't really end due to my decision. So yeah, I'll probably be a Shrek and still have no proper relationship when I'm 32 at this rate!!
Click to expand...

Yay! You're here! Aw Caroline, I know how you feel. When I was 11, I always thought I was way behind on the boy front. Everyone else told me they'd had thier first kiss, thier first boyfriend and I felt like a fruit since I didn't even have any super close guy friends. Of course I know know that the people who told me that they were at the park every night kissing boys were making it up, but at the time little 11 year old me felt that I must undesirable and 'too ugly' for a boyfriend if all my friends were getting so much action and I wasn't even getting a look sideways, even though I tried my hardest to be kind to everyone.

When I was 11 we had a leaving disco at my primary school. A boy in my class asked me if I would want to go with him. I was beyond delighted - a boy!! Interested in me!! I got my self looking lovely for him. Spend the whole day getting my hair perfect and spent all my pocket money on silly little things like glittery nail varnish and sparkly things in my hair. My dad drove me to the disco. I remember he was fussing about me wearing too much makeup even though I only had a little bit of glitter on my checks, but in the end he told me I was beautiful, gave me a bear hug and told me to have a good time and that he loved me lots. I felt on top of the world.

I got into my school hall were the disco was taking place and I seen Martin, the guy who had asked me to the dance. I walked up to him with the biggest smile on my face ever, but before I got there he started laughing. He then shouted infront of everyone (the music hadn't started yet) "Do you think I'd go out with a big whale like you? I was JOKING. It was a BET to ask you out. Omg you're pathetic" and his friends were bent over killing themselves laughing... infront of my whole class. :cry: I ran back outside, but my dad was gone and I sat down on the grass and cried my little heart out with humiliation and rejection. The pain was raw.

For the next few years, probably right through until I was about 17, I was very wary of people telling me that they liked me. I think that incident scarred me more than I thought. I always thought that there was a possibility that it could of been another 'joke'. Even to this day I feel I need re-assurance from everyone that the person actually does like me and isn't just liking me for another reason.

It's sad but these incidents shape who you are.

However, since I've lost all my weight I can't tell you how different things are. I'm not saying that I'm wonderfully gorgeous and I'm all that, but now I'm slowly, but surly starting to see that I'm confident enough to go for better boys, like boys I've of previously thought were wayyy out of my league. Like last night in the bar before the clubs a guy came up to me and asked me if he could buy me a drink, I said "No offence, but no thank you. I'm kinda seeing someone and I don't want to disrespect them" and he replied "Oh well, it was too good to be true, you're out of my league anyway" and the funny thing is I think he genuinely thought that I was out of his league!! ME!! out of someones league? NO chance! But now I'm starting to think "maybe I am good enough for these 'better' guys". Honestly, the confidence from weight loss does wonders. It's sad that that's the society we live in but the smaller you are, the better life will be to you. A HORRIBLE HORRIBLE ethos, but sadly as I've now lived on both sides of the coin I can tell you it's 100% true.

You'll have boys AND girls falling over themselves for you. I've went from having nobody for years to actually having a choice between some AMAZING people who I previously wouldn't of even entertained the thought of going out with. And it's not because I'm wonderful or stunning or anything, I *think* that's just how society treats slim people. Life changing indeed.

When I was bigger I used to say that I had high confidence, but now I look back and I realise I never did. And when I lost weight my confidence grew tendfold. Not only my confidence in others but my confidence in myself.

I don't need the memory of what happened to me when I was 11 to haunt me. I am my own person. I have the confidence to allow myself to take chances with relationships now and if I get hurt then that's ok. It doesn't mean I'm a bad person or a fruit for trusting someone. I have the confidence in myself to know it's just life. And I'd be very surprised if you don't have the same transformation too :)
 
And can I just say in the past 3 months since I've lost the beef I've had more intrest in me than I've ever had in my puff times 1090912 million!! And also, I've learned a sudden increase in confidence can be a bit of a shock to the system and isn't always a good thing lol ...
 
It's totally a shame you didn't have wotsits kinetic Thingy powers!!! (brain fart moment I know what I mean I just can't find the word........dementia is soooo setting in!!!) you could have had a carrie style reign of terror instead of feeling so sad :)

11 yr old boys are horrible. I will soon have two :( if I catch em doing any of that kind of crap they'll be going to school with 'I wet the bed' in permanent marker across their forehead!!!

I didn't have a good time at school either untill i was maybe 14 and just decided that i didnt really care about being popular or going out with the 'right' boys, and I was thin as a rake!! Thin an pretty dont ALWAYS equal popular!! So I do know what you mean. It's very very hurtfull. My problem wasn't to do with my size rather the family I came from but no child should feel like they are worthless, unlovable or anything other than special!!! Coz they all are :) apart from the boys obviously. Lol. They are just annoying !!!

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
 
Hey Tina! :D I agree with you that thin and pretty doesn't always equal popular. Some of the most unpopular kids at my school where terribly thin. But I think that confidence definetly does, and that's something I only got when I lost 5 stone.

I don't have a hard time now, far from it. Those people that teased me are godness knows where and I'm terribly happy in life just now (minus exams lol). Sometimes I just wish I'd lost weight sooner so I didn't need to go through some of the things I did, or so that I would be able to deal with the way my life has changed now.

I was saying to a girl last night actually that I had never kissed a boy before I was 18. And she was like "You're kidding on!! Where you really religious?" I told her "No, just not confident enough". I'm super confident, sometimes even too outgoing now, and people who have only known me a few months are shocked when I tell them how I used to be. I'm still the same Lucy, just I have faith in myself to live my life. It's sad for me though to think that weight had such a huge factor on that, but it's all in the past, I can't change it and the future is all that matters anyway <3
 
What a horrible thing to happen Lucy, children can be so cruel sometimes. To be honest, there's no big thing like that that's happened to me, my life hasn't been particularly interesting in either way on that front! I know things will change as I lose weight, it's horrible to think that it makes that much difference but I know that it does. I'm not particularly in any rush for anything anyway. Part of me thinks being with someone would be nice but actually, life is about to get pretty busy, so I really don't need the distraction anyway.
 
caroline g said:
What a horrible thing to happen Lucy, children can be so cruel sometimes. To be honest, there's no big thing like that that's happened to me, my life hasn't been particularly interesting in either way on that front! I know things will change as I lose weight, it's horrible to think that it makes that much difference but I know that it does. I'm not particularly in any rush for anything anyway. Part of me thinks being with someone would be nice but actually, life is about to get pretty busy, so I really don't need the distraction anyway.
Click to expand...

It's not like a outstandingly horrible thing that happened, but I suppose it could explain why I used to run a mile at slightest whiff of potential boyfriend in my early teens!! :)

I do want to spend my life with someone. I want to take care of them and be a girlfriend. My boyfriend before my ex (so my ex ex) was lovely, we had a wonderful time together but in the end we just grew apart, like a lot of teenage relationships naturally do (still great friends though).

I'm just sad that I've now met a genuinely awesome person but he's moving away and if I was to spend time with him from now until he goes away I've got to fit it around 3 exams!! Life can be so unfair :( My first exam is in three weeks and they finish 10 days later. I can just try and study my ass off when I can and spare a few hours (or 5) for social times, right? Gahhh LORD OF THE EXAMS!! GIVE ME BRAIN POWER LOL!
 
I'm really glad I was one of the fat ugly ones at school! We all stuck together and knew that none of us was going to have a bf and that made life much more simple!!
I didn't kiss a boy until I was at college so I was a very late starter!
 
I was always the fat but funny one at school. I used to make friends by making people laugh.
I used to think I had a great circle of friends around me, but if I'm honest they all took the p**s out of me and I laughed along with them. Even so called, "best friends".

I would quite like to just be funny now, rather than fat and funny. :)
 
Oh dear. Am I the only one who actually WAS kissing boys every night at the park??? Coz your only a slapper if you let em get to second base!! Kissing doesn't count BTW. :) and frankly you didn't miss much!! Kissing is really only fun when the boys get older an better at it!!! And it's a mite chilly in the winter months. That's all I really remember ;)

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
 
No, you weren't alone Tina, as I got older I realised that I could use my curves to my advantage. (I was a 16-18) I was doing plenty of kissing!!!! :)
 
I was too shy to do much of that, and still now am a bit of a wimp, i have no IDEA how I managed to get married to a guy who is at least as socially awkward as I am, if not more! LOL.

I freak out when guys approach me... thankfully I can just yell "married" at them now! LOL.
 
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