WW Round 3 - Millie's Diary

[AliGal]

What a wonderful story of overcoming a tough situation. Hopefully the Friday fear will slip away as you realise how you are rocking your job and your emerging new body!

 

[mistyangel]

I won't write today's date...yep I am THAT superstitious

Read the below if you want - not really diet related although mental health impacts on our diet!

Fridays are TOUGH for me for the below reasons:

1. I finish earlier so I have to fit an hour of work in somewhere else.
2. I have a meeting when I usually eat EVERY Friday
3. Due to this meeting I have HIGH anxiety for no reason
4. After feeling anxious and not being able to eat...I wanna raid the cupboard

I, Millie, stopped myself from walking to Tescos and getting my favourite meal deal after going through the above today. I am soooo proud of myself! I talked myself down and said 'I have my lunch with me, stop. You are having a subway tomorrow think how much more you will enjoy it if you are on plan today!'

The reason for this anxiety (and I will keep this brief): I had a job earlier this year where a manager bullied me. Told me I was rubbish at my job (a job they were not even qualified to do themselves might I add) and generally put me down everyday. I went in to work wondering whether today would be the day i'd be sacked. I was sick every morning, cried on the way to and on the way from work. My self confidence was at an all time low...

Then..I got the interview for the job I have now! Due to my confidence I almost cancelled it. I would be so MAD at myself if I had...
Within the first week of being in my new role my manager, her manager, the head teacher and the governors were astounded by the work I was doing with the kids!

Yet...some of that self confidence is still floating around somewhere and THAT is why I feel anxious when meeting my manager weekly. I feel like i'll be 'found out' for being a fraud even though I AM good at my job and I trained so hard to get where I am!!

So usually on a Friday, after high anxiety, she'd tell me what a great job I am doing and then off i'd pop to tesco starving and wanting a meal deal!

Well done if you read all of that...

I am now sat here having just finished my on plan lunch feeling rather pleased with myself. I may treat myself to one of the WW cookbooks I have my eye on

Thanks for reading x

You should be proud of yourself Millie, it is astounding how others can have such a negative impact on our self esteem and confidence. I ended up leaving a job I loved because of an Assistant Director, was one of the biggest mistakes of my life. I allowed someone else to determine my life choices and allowed someone to dis-empower me. I think my life pretty much disintegrated after that, (too long a story).

Keep reminding yourself how wonderful you actually are!!!!!

 

[millieliza]

You should be proud of yourself Millie, it is astounding how others can have such a negative impact on our self esteem and confidence. I ended up leaving a job I loved because of an Assistant Director, was one of the biggest mistakes of my life. I allowed someone else to determine my life choices and allowed someone to dis-empower me. I think my life pretty much disintegrated after that, (too long a story).

Keep reminding yourself how wonderful you actually are!!!!!

I almost left my industry as well and retrained as something else - something I had as a 'back-up' but not my dream. It was the students that kept me sane throughout it all, they had no idea what was going on but they always managed to say the right things to me without knowing. I miss those students and I am gutted that I wasn't able to see them succeed but now I have new students who need me more!

We really shouldn't let people dictate our futures...but it's so easy to put someone down. Especially me, I am sensitive!

x

 

[millieliza]

What a wonderful story of overcoming a tough situation. Hopefully the Friday fear will slip away as you realise how you are rocking your job and your emerging new body!

Hoping the Friday fear goes away soon! Jotting it down on here has made me realise the patter of it. Always a friday, always starving. So now I can make some adjustments - maybe eat some fruit at break time! x

 

[millieliza]

16/09/2019

How...is it Monday already last week dragged by and then that weekend seemed to be gone in the blink of an eye!

Had a lovely weekend! Friday night I went to check on my friends cat I have been feeding etc. He had decided to drag all their bath towels in to the litter tray and poo and pee all over them! I stuck them in a wash and hung them up for them don't worry!
Then I went to a spin class afterwards, and had the most uninspiring instructor of all time. She only spoke to tell us to turn the gear up or to stand up etc. There was no motivation and in fact I forgot she was even in the class at times...
Anyway I sweated so at least I got a work out!

On Saturday, I slept in and then I just chilled out during the day between doing some housework. My friend came over for Gin and we got a mcdonalds, yum yum. We sat until the wee hours putting the world to rights.

On Sunday the boyfriend and I went a lovely walk when we got home we done the last of the housework and watched a film. It s*xtuplets on netflix, it was really bad! I then went for a lovely soak in the tub and tried to forget it was Sunday night

Back on plan after a weekend of eating what the hell I want...when I don't go to my workshop I just eat poop. Will go to workshop this coming saturday. Take my gain and start again if I need to

 

[millieliza]

Challenges:

I have set myself a couple of challenges before I go to Florida at half term:

1: '40/40' I dont know if anyone on here has heard of 100/100 on instagram. Its basically 100 workouts in 100 days! I have decided since its 40 days till Florida I will do 40/40 starting with a lunchtime walk today!

2: Not eating any chocolate or crisps during the day and saving a 'treat' for the evening.

I have decided the second one as I was using too many points on crisps and then feeling really sluggish! I have a yogurt with me as something sweet for lunch and some grapes instead of my usual crisps

 

[millieliza]

17/09/2019

So yesterday was very unexciting - went home and my friend came over for a cuppa. We sat and put the world to rights and then I made my favourite Tandoori Chicken for dinner All on plan of course. I managed not to snack until later like I planned and I feel really pleased with myself.

Anyway...this morning I woke up to a text asking if anyone was interested in covering a Spin Class on a Monday until the end of the year!! Covering maternity I have put my name down so please everyone cross their fingers and their toes for me because I REALLY want my own class!! Now I am in work and I can't concentrate on the job in hand because I am waiting to see if I have my own class

Today I have some leftover tandoori chicken in a roll for lunch - it is honestly so good - a yogurt and some fruit will go a walk at lunch time for the fresh air but I plan on going to Spin class this evening as well.

Have a lovely day!

 

[millieliza]

Making a conscious effort...

This diary has become a dumping ground for my thoughts! However, I do think it helps as it is keeping me from snacking/not putting things down and eating my emotions!

Anyhoo...I am currently making a conscious effort in work. The job I do is quite isolating and I am the only one in my team. My team is me... Anyway after the summer break I found myself feeling quite lonely. I do miss that office 'banter' and team atmosphere. So I decided I needed to make a conscious effort with the people around me. I have signed up to help with School trips and I have no included myself in a 'buddy scheme' where you buy a colleague a present anonymously - doesn't need to be anything big just a little something to make them smile! I get a random present in return

 

[millieliza]

I HAVE MY OWN SPIN CLASSSSSSSS!

I woke up to a message saying I had been successful and I now have my own spin class on a Monday at 6:30pm!! So excited!!

 

[bloodcoveredprincess]

I HAVE MY OWN SPIN CLASSSSSSSS!

I woke up to a message saying I had been successful and I now have my own spin class on a Monday at 6:30pm!! So excited!!

Go you...... that's brilliant

 

[bloodcoveredprincess]

Making a conscious effort...

This diary has become a dumping ground for my thoughts! However, I do think it helps as it is keeping me from snacking/not putting things down and eating my emotions!

Anyhoo...I am currently making a conscious effort in work. The job I do is quite isolating and I am the only one in my team. My team is me... Anyway after the summer break I found myself feeling quite lonely. I do miss that office 'banter' and team atmosphere. So I decided I needed to make a conscious effort with the people around me. I have signed up to help with School trips and I have no included myself in a 'buddy scheme' where you buy a colleague a present anonymously - doesn't need to be anything big just a little something to make them smile! I get a random present in return

Great that you are putting a plan in place ....well done

 

[bloodcoveredprincess]

17/09/2019

So yesterday was very unexciting - went home and my friend came over for a cuppa. We sat and put the world to rights and then I made my favourite Tandoori Chicken for dinner All on plan of course. I managed not to snack until later like I planned and I feel really pleased with myself.

Anyway...this morning I woke up to a text asking if anyone was interested in covering a Spin Class on a Monday until the end of the year!! Covering maternity I have put my name down so please everyone cross their fingers and their toes for me because I REALLY want my own class!! Now I am in work and I can't concentrate on the job in hand because I am waiting to see if I have my own class

Today I have some leftover tandoori chicken in a roll for lunch - it is honestly so good - a yogurt and some fruit will go a walk at lunch time for the fresh air but I plan on going to Spin class this evening as well.

Have a lovely day!

you are a busy bee ..... the chicken sounds lovely

 

[bloodcoveredprincess]

16/09/2019

How...is it Monday already last week dragged by and then that weekend seemed to be gone in the blink of an eye!

Had a lovely weekend! Friday night I went to check on my friends cat I have been feeding etc. He had decided to drag all their bath towels in to the litter tray and poo and pee all over them! I stuck them in a wash and hung them up for them don't worry!
Then I went to a spin class afterwards, and had the most uninspiring instructor of all time. She only spoke to tell us to turn the gear up or to stand up etc. There was no motivation and in fact I forgot she was even in the class at times...
Anyway I sweated so at least I got a work out!

On Saturday, I slept in and then I just chilled out during the day between doing some housework. My friend came over for Gin and we got a mcdonalds, yum yum. We sat until the wee hours putting the world to rights.

On Sunday the boyfriend and I went a lovely walk when we got home we done the last of the housework and watched a film. It s*xtuplets on netflix, it was really bad! I then went for a lovely soak in the tub and tried to forget it was Sunday night

Back on plan after a weekend of eating what the hell I want...when I don't go to my workshop I just eat poop. Will go to workshop this coming saturday. Take my gain and start again if I need to

I really miss having someone to walk with....I just have my furry friends since my daughter moved to another town

 

[millieliza]

I really miss having someone to walk with....I just have my furry friends since my daughter moved to another town

Aw so lucky to have furry friends! I would love to get a dog but the other half keeps putting it off!

 

[millieliza]

19/09/2019

I am struggling to keep on plan

I am going to weigh in on Saturday and I am going to take the gain and move forward. The more I avoid my WW Workshop the more I put on! For some reason the group environment keeps me accountable and focused. And what works for me works for me...

Anyway last night was lovely and warm so my friend and I went a walk. She wanted to treat me as I got my own spin class so we went to costa but it was too hot for a hot drink so it was iced coffee and a muffin, I got the Lemon one.

I would like to go to Spin this evening but my other half is away tomorrow to Amsterdam and then he's off to Germany for work next week, so I feel like I should skip class and spend some time with him tonight! Although I have a feeling he will want to play his computer game as much as he can before he goes so probably wouldn't mind me nipping out for 45 mins! I will see what he says when I get home I might see if he would like to go a walk if not, it's just too nice to sit in the house all evening!

Tomorrow he will be away and I will go to my spin class and just have myself to sort for dinner I have been looking at the Morrisons Freshly made microwave meals and there's a couple that I want to try so I may pick one up on the way home tomorrow for tea - they are also quite easy on the points...which is a bonus! I can also get two for £5 which would sort Sundays dinner out as well...so many plans!

I don't know if I mentioned that I have my own SPIN CLASSSSSSSS I have music on in the background at work and I keep thinking how I can make each track in to a spin track - my brain is so distracted by this I need the first class to be done so the novelty wears off

Have a lovely day

 

[millieliza]

23/09/2019

Happy Monday everyone...
Friday; I hardly slept (got about 2 hours) and dragged myself up for weigh in to accept my gain and get on with this week. As soon as I got there I could see a massive sign saying the meeting had been cancelled!! So I went to boots to weigh myself on their scales...the scales were broke So I weighed in at home and could see a gain of 4lbs! So I will count that and try to get some of it off before next week.

The rest of saturday was nice met some friends, drank too much wine and ended up at the pub! Sunday we went for brunch to soak up some of the alcohol and I just chilled. I went to pick up some bedside tables from a lady on the fb sales page. £15 bargain. They need sanding, painting and some new handles. That's my new home project to get on with and keep my hand out the crisp drawer.

Today I woke up to the sad news of Thomas Cook - so looks like Florida is cancelled for half term but I honestly feel so sad for the staff. We will get our money back, these people have no jobs.

Tonight my lovely man is hoooooooome! Yay! Missed him too much and I have my first OWN spin class this evening too, eek!!

Going to catch up on everyone else's diaries

 

[millieliza]

24/09/2019

Yesterday consisted of finishing work and running to the airport to pick up my Boyfriend and his friend. Rushing back home, changing and going to pick up my friend to bring her to my spin class. I think I should start charging taxi...

Foodwise yesterday was OK - had my on plan tandoori chicken for dinner but had an off plan lunch. I am really struggling as I haven't been to class and I have been toying with the idea of just going to a class tonight to weigh and be on track the rest of the week...don't know what to do!

Exercise wise everything is going great I have my lunch time walk for 30 mins and then I have been trying to go to a spain class at least 3 times a week. Currently on the waiting list for one this evening but we will see if I get on I am also feeling very tired today so might be wise to not spin this evening...although I know I would regret not going...too many decisions to make!!

Have a lovely day