Advice re mums birthday party

[kingleds]

Well a bit of an update for you. Tonight she phoned me to remind me about the party & to ask me to contribute towards the DJ & food. She termed it as 'your sister said you & her were thinking of doing a surprise thing for my birthday & as I've already booked something she said it might be an Iraq if you helped pay for the food & DJ.'

I refused. Said I did not have the money, that I was already paying £100 to go up there for it, and that she had a cheek to ask when she's not even bothered to phone me in nearly 3 months. She said she thought she'd phoned me more recently than that. But she apologised - which is a 1st

She also FINALLY thanked me for the all inclusive Jamaica holiday. Seriously. Hell is about to freeze over people.

So, upshot is. I've told her that a DJ is a waste of money. All she needs is a sound system & an iPod with a playlist on it. I have offered to put the
Playlist together for her. So she feels like i'm doing something & I don't feel like she's taking the piss.

And we are staying her place too so less spent on hotels as well.

 

[Minimunchkins]

Hey - is there any way she's on Mims with us & seen all our disgusted posts?????
Brilliant news - so glad you told her straight & you never know, perhaps it was with you 'facing up to her' that she realises that she can't just walk over your feelings after all.
All the very best and enjoy catching up with your sister & her family.

 

[fillymum]

Well a bit of an update for you. Tonight she phoned me to remind me about the party & to ask me to contribute towards the DJ & food. She termed it as 'your sister said you & her were thinking of doing a surprise thing for my birthday & as I've already booked something she said it might be an Iraq if you helped pay for the food & DJ.'

I refused. Said I did not have the money, that I was already paying £100 to go up there for it, and that she had a cheek to ask when she's not even bothered to phone me in nearly 3 months. She said she thought she'd phoned me more recently than that. But she apologised - which is a 1st

She also FINALLY thanked me for the all inclusive Jamaica holiday. Seriously. Hell is about to freeze over people.

So, upshot is. I've told her that a DJ is a waste of money. All she needs is a sound system & an iPod with a playlist on it. I have offered to put the
Playlist together for her. So she feels like i'm doing something & I don't feel like she's taking the piss.

And we are staying her place too so less spent on hotels as well.

I am so pleased for you that at last she might be feeling and behaving like a loving mum should. I feel she might be trying to build bridges. If not at least you have lost nothing because you didn't have it before.

I truly hope for the best for you and your sister and that you have an enjoyable time and perhaps discover that after all this time she wants to be a mum.

 

[MadameLaMinx]

Good work K-face! Have you spoken to your sister about it since you spoke to your mum?

 

[big bear]

So pleased to hear this hun, lets hope she sticks to it & glad ur staying at hers & saving money. Good for u sticking to what u think, hope u now can chill & have a fab time XXX

 

[*Emsie*]

Well a bit of an update for you. Tonight she phoned me to remind me about the party & to ask me to contribute towards the DJ & food. She termed it as 'your sister said you & her were thinking of doing a surprise thing for my birthday & as I've already booked something she said it might be an Iraq if you helped pay for the food & DJ.'

I refused. Said I did not have the money, that I was already paying £100 to go up there for it, and that she had a cheek to ask when she's not even bothered to phone me in nearly 3 months. She said she thought she'd phoned me more recently than that. But she apologised - which is a 1st

She also FINALLY thanked me for the all inclusive Jamaica holiday. Seriously. Hell is about to freeze over people.

So, upshot is. I've told her that a DJ is a waste of money. All she needs is a sound system & an iPod with a playlist on it. I have offered to put the
Playlist together for her. So she feels like i'm doing something & I don't feel like she's taking the piss.

And we are staying her place too so less spent on hotels as well.

Wow! Sounds good hope she sticks to it all and it turns out well x Well Done for sticking up for yourself x

 

[Happy Holidays]

Thanks for update, brilliant news, it doesn't seem to have turned out too bad after all.

 

[kingleds]

It will be interesting to see if she continues in the same vein. Now I need to tackle the little sister. She's the one who suggested the surprise party in the 1st place, and I know (cos she told me) that she told mum that I was involved in that, when I wasn't. She needs to stop doing stuff like that. They are very simlar in their outlooks and thinking. In her head, she's thought 'Sarah will pay for that if I suggest it to mum', and even after I had said a flat out no, she's probably thought she could get me talked round That is partly my fault, because in the past she would have been able to.

Regardless of any of that I feel better for telling my mum that she is being a bit rubbish.

 

[donna88]

Well a bit of an update for you. Tonight she phoned me to remind me about the party & to ask me to contribute towards the DJ & food. She termed it as 'your sister said you & her were thinking of doing a surprise thing for my birthday & as I've already booked something she said it might be an Iraq if you helped pay for the food & DJ.'

I refused. Said I did not have the money, that I was already paying £100 to go up there for it, and that she had a cheek to ask when she's not even bothered to phone me in nearly 3 months. She said she thought she'd phoned me more recently than that. But she apologised - which is a 1st

She also FINALLY thanked me for the all inclusive Jamaica holiday. Seriously. Hell is about to freeze over people.

So, upshot is. I've told her that a DJ is a waste of money. All she needs is a sound system & an iPod with a playlist on it. I have offered to put the
Playlist together for her. So she feels like i'm doing something & I don't feel like she's taking the piss.

And we are staying her place too so less spent on hotels as well.

woo great news and a great idea about putting a play list together

It does sound like you have your hands full with both your sister and your mum. I don't think your a mug, you sound like you just like to please people, which isn't a bad trait, although when people start to take the mess you need to put your foot down. Which you are doing

I hope the party goes well and that you and your husband enjoy it