Alfielulu's CD journey
- Thread starter Alfielulu
- Start date
Alfielulu
Full Member
T minus 9
God I am such a bundle of guilt today. :break_diet:
I know new years eve is never a great day for me, I always find it depressing and always have done. God knows why. The only good one I had was when I was working!
I am cutting down on bread and cheese and starting to eat veg and fruit (I have chicken and peppers with natural yoghurt last night for tea) but I have spent the day mentally beating myself up about having bread for lunch. I had less than I would normally but I just thought about all the people on here not having food and felt guilty. I need to get a grip!
Food and self esteem are so interwoven its scary. Yet the ironic thing is most people who have low self esteem are the nicest people ever with much nicer that those who are full of themselves!
Well I have turned down a highly fattening take away tonight in favour of something better for me (but not as good for me as CD meal!) So I am proud of that and should focus myself on that instead.
Sometimes just writing stuff down helps - I feel more positive having written this than I did when I first logged on and a little less guilty too.
I wonder if the guilt does ever end??
xALx
God I am such a bundle of guilt today. :break_diet:
I know new years eve is never a great day for me, I always find it depressing and always have done. God knows why. The only good one I had was when I was working!
I am cutting down on bread and cheese and starting to eat veg and fruit (I have chicken and peppers with natural yoghurt last night for tea) but I have spent the day mentally beating myself up about having bread for lunch. I had less than I would normally but I just thought about all the people on here not having food and felt guilty. I need to get a grip!
Food and self esteem are so interwoven its scary. Yet the ironic thing is most people who have low self esteem are the nicest people ever with much nicer that those who are full of themselves!
Well I have turned down a highly fattening take away tonight in favour of something better for me (but not as good for me as CD meal!) So I am proud of that and should focus myself on that instead.
Sometimes just writing stuff down helps - I feel more positive having written this than I did when I first logged on and a little less guilty too.
I wonder if the guilt does ever end??
xALx
jojoCD1989
Full Member
I replied to your post on katies thread! You are on the right path you've nothing to feel guilty about! Like you said you've cut down on carbs. Your having less than usual so good for you and well done for turning down the take away. Über proud of you :-D
katiebaby
Gold Member
Sounds like your doing great to me Al.. Dont beat your self up (says me who is an expert)... I am hoping this stops along the way. you said you had less bread than normal this in itself is a great achievement 
xx
Happy New Year.... Here is to ALL of us meeting our goals in 2012 xx
xxHappy New Year.... Here is to ALL of us meeting our goals in 2012
xx
Alfielulu
Full Member
T minus 8
Well today is better.....
Only two slices of bread with cheese for lunch and some nuts so am not hungry yet. Will have a veggie stir fry and celeriac chips. Nice an low carb.....
Am going to sit and watch Sherlock while I eat it. Funny how much more positive I feel now the pressure of NYE has passed.
Walked the dog again today - everyday this week so far so that is going good too. I really didn't want to go out but I reminded myself how good I would feel if I did and how sh!t I would feel if I didn't. Three hours later in front of the fire and that horrible out of breath and sweaty feeling has gone.
I dont think I've lost any weight but I feel better and thats what its all about!!
xALx
Well today is better.....
Only two slices of bread with cheese for lunch and some nuts so am not hungry yet. Will have a veggie stir fry and celeriac chips. Nice an low carb.....
Am going to sit and watch Sherlock while I eat it. Funny how much more positive I feel now the pressure of NYE has passed.
Walked the dog again today - everyday this week so far so that is going good too. I really didn't want to go out but I reminded myself how good I would feel if I did and how sh!t I would feel if I didn't. Three hours later in front of the fire and that horrible out of breath and sweaty feeling has gone.
I dont think I've lost any weight but I feel better and thats what its all about!!
xALx
Alfielulu
Full Member
T minus maybe 1?
I've got fed up waiting for my appointment with CDC to the point where I am disappointed to be eating actual food! So I've ordered a weeks worth of slim and save so I can start a bit earlier and then I hopefully will get into it easier. I am SO impatient!! A sample pack should arrive tomorrow which will get me through Tuesday and then a week pack should arrive Wednesday
I've cleared out the cupboard of all sorts of things and packed them off to my mums. I've eaten up the last bit of pasta in the house so everything left is only stuff the hubbie will eat. (He has odd eating stuff anyway!!!)
Now for the bad news..... the weight I was using (14st 2lb) was taken by the doc on 15th Dec and I weighed myself today at my mum's - 14st 5lb!!! I shouldn't be surprised really as I did eat a bit over Christmas and I didn't decide to start this diet until 27th so.....I'm still annoyed but being realistic it's not a surprise. I have updated my ticker and details and its only 3 more lbs I suppose but it's just annoying. :break_diet:
I think this is why I SO didn't want to eat today. I had a bagel and a banana about 1pm and by 5pm nearly passed out as I felt really dizzy and tingly so I had to eat something quick. I was pissed off that I had to eat something but then again I don't think starving myself will work either.
That sample pack better turn up tomorrow!!!! I just don't want to eat food anymore. (The irony being in a couple of weeks time of shakes etc I will be desperate for real food probably so I must remember to read this back and remind myself how much I don't want to eat at the moment)
xALx
I've got fed up waiting for my appointment with CDC to the point where I am disappointed to be eating actual food! So I've ordered a weeks worth of slim and save so I can start a bit earlier and then I hopefully will get into it easier. I am SO impatient!! A sample pack should arrive tomorrow which will get me through Tuesday and then a week pack should arrive Wednesday
I've cleared out the cupboard of all sorts of things and packed them off to my mums. I've eaten up the last bit of pasta in the house so everything left is only stuff the hubbie will eat. (He has odd eating stuff anyway!!!)
Now for the bad news..... the weight I was using (14st 2lb) was taken by the doc on 15th Dec and I weighed myself today at my mum's - 14st 5lb!!! I shouldn't be surprised really as I did eat a bit over Christmas and I didn't decide to start this diet until 27th so.....I'm still annoyed but being realistic it's not a surprise. I have updated my ticker and details and its only 3 more lbs I suppose but it's just annoying. :break_diet:
I think this is why I SO didn't want to eat today. I had a bagel and a banana about 1pm and by 5pm nearly passed out as I felt really dizzy and tingly so I had to eat something quick. I was pissed off that I had to eat something but then again I don't think starving myself will work either.
That sample pack better turn up tomorrow!!!! I just don't want to eat food anymore. (The irony being in a couple of weeks time of shakes etc I will be desperate for real food probably so I must remember to read this back and remind myself how much I don't want to eat at the moment)
xALx
jojoCD1989
Full Member
Lol im impatient too! You're so good starting early and dont worry about those extra 3lbs you lose them in no time! Let me know how you get on! :-D. X
LessofLou
Full Member
AL I know exactly how you feel!! My CDC only got back to me yesterday as she had been away so I wasnt sure if I was going to be able to pick everything up in time. I was going to get some Tony Ferguson stuff from Boots if not as I was so desperate to start!! (I had never heard of Slim and Save)
We will definitely have to read this back in a week or so and relive the enthusiasm!!!!
We will definitely have to read this back in a week or so and relive the enthusiasm!!!!
geenabee
Full Member
Fantastic! you go girl-have you already eaten today or is today day 1?
Alfielulu
Full Member
thanks no not eaten today so this is day one with a late breakfast!
jojoCD1989
Full Member
Yay!! Good luck :-D xx
geenabee
Full Member
Great stuff!
Alfielulu
Full Member
Day 1
Well here it is - Day 1!!
It went ok, got one of my products to go and then bed. Was a bit hungry when I got home at 7 but not so much that i felt sick or poorly.
I can tell I have eaten less as, to be honest, its much less!! I reckon I must eat about 3 times this in a day so my stomach has definitely noticed. I think if it could talk it'd ask me "where the hell are those biscuits woman?"
Hubbie has gone out and I made him take all remaining biscuits and chocolate with him! Just me and my choc shake to go. I called in Morrisons on the way home and bought a blender (£9 bargain!) so at least it will be sort of shaken!
My next pack of S&S should come tomorrow which will see me through until I go to my CDC on 9th. I've been very boringly analytical today and done a comparison between S&S products and CD products and can find negligible difference in Cal or Carb. I am keeping a record of what I am eating and am noting both so I can see I am not above what I would be if I was on 4 CD products a day. This way I have got some variety and choice (as well as S&S being cheaper).
I made the spag bol tonight and had to laugh. I emptied the packet, looked at the bowl and then looked in the packet again - "come on where's the rest!"? I made it up thinking "hmm maybe it gets bigger"... it didn't! :cry: So I got the smallest plate/bowl we have ( a finger bowl!) put it in there and thought "Hmm that looks bigger" Its all psychological.
I will see what I weigh when I go to the CDC on 9th. I am not expecting a lot or to be in ketosis by then but if I am and I have lost it proves mixing the two doesn't matter. My little experiment :clap:
So sitting watching a film, vanilla candles on, fluffy warm blankie and fire on.... perfect! *chants* MUST NOT THINK ABOUT FOOD MUST NOT THINK ABOUT FOOD MUST NOT THINK ABOUT FOOD. ......
Well here it is - Day 1!!
It went ok, got one of my products to go and then bed. Was a bit hungry when I got home at 7 but not so much that i felt sick or poorly.
I can tell I have eaten less as, to be honest, its much less!! I reckon I must eat about 3 times this in a day so my stomach has definitely noticed. I think if it could talk it'd ask me "where the hell are those biscuits woman?"
Hubbie has gone out and I made him take all remaining biscuits and chocolate with him! Just me and my choc shake to go. I called in Morrisons on the way home and bought a blender (£9 bargain!) so at least it will be sort of shaken!
My next pack of S&S should come tomorrow which will see me through until I go to my CDC on 9th. I've been very boringly analytical today and done a comparison between S&S products and CD products and can find negligible difference in Cal or Carb. I am keeping a record of what I am eating and am noting both so I can see I am not above what I would be if I was on 4 CD products a day. This way I have got some variety and choice (as well as S&S being cheaper).
I made the spag bol tonight and had to laugh. I emptied the packet, looked at the bowl and then looked in the packet again - "come on where's the rest!"? I made it up thinking "hmm maybe it gets bigger"... it didn't! :cry: So I got the smallest plate/bowl we have ( a finger bowl!) put it in there and thought "Hmm that looks bigger" Its all psychological.
I will see what I weigh when I go to the CDC on 9th. I am not expecting a lot or to be in ketosis by then but if I am and I have lost it proves mixing the two doesn't matter. My little experiment :clap:
So sitting watching a film, vanilla candles on, fluffy warm blankie and fire on.... perfect! *chants* MUST NOT THINK ABOUT FOOD MUST NOT THINK ABOUT FOOD MUST NOT THINK ABOUT FOOD. ......
