Alpaca's stream of consciousness - IS BACK ON THE WAGON!

[Alpaca]

Good morning lovely! Hope you're having a great day xx

Hello Alpy... I'm so pleased its Friday but it's quite a good day

 

[Alpaca]

or LOL even :sigh:

Oh dear! Finger problems today Jim? Lol

 

[ladyfelsham]

LOL nice one. Hope you've got a quiet weekend planned, Di?

 

[Alpaca]

Just home from work - feel a bit frazzled - have to do my Flo nursey job this weekend again as ex MiL still in hospital ... More of her washing, shopping and visiting ! Could really do without it - there's so much work stuff going on!

Have poured myself a vodka and soda and am demolishing a veg, bacon, cheese omelette lol

 

[ladyfelsham]

And you deserve both, you're terrific to be doing all this stuff for the MiL!

 

[Kat1e]

Evening sweetie- hope feet up and vodka down you're really being wonderful doing all that support over the weekend - well done and hang in there
Xxxx

 

[Alpaca]

Thank you! And I've not been to the park and I'm weighing tomorrow with new scales !!! I must see what I can do this evening to help the situation lol

 

[Quak]

Hope you managed to get to the park lol xx

You must really like your ex MiL - just saying.

 

[Alpaca]

Morning all... Park was ok not brilliant! Lol

It feels like its been a struggle this week with food and control... I really think its linked to stress ... Sorry for stating the bl**ding obvious but I'm someone who has spent zero time on myself hence ballooning to the size I am/was ... So all this thought on food and weight and stuff can be a full time job which is great when I feel I have the time but otherwise I just respond to stress - mostly at work and struggle to remember what I shovel into my mouth! Lol

Anyway I now have new scales - which are sitting next to the old ones! I really have gone bonkers! Lol have weighed on both and the old ones showed a gain of 2.5 lbs... And the new ones show a loss of 2lb overall this week...

I will have to get rid of the old ones cos I am more drawn to what they say and am thinking that the new ones are wrong (somebody shoot me quick to put me out of my misery!!)

Ok... So I'm an OCD person ... Maybe I need 3 scales!! OCDs prefer things in 3s !!! Lol

B - egg, mushrooms, bacon, garlic, coffee, cream

L - a chicken thing

D- another chicken thing

Hope you have good days

 

[Alpaca]

Sorry about this next post - please don't read it as its self indulgent clap trap ...

Ok... I'm feeling really down today - partly because of the dawning realisation that the High light of most of my weeks so far has been visiting the ex MiL and doing unpaid for work for my difficult clients ... The trouble is that my best friend now has a baby and we used to do lots together and my gay friends are now in Toronto and my single male friend (who was never my sort of person but fun to do things with) is now with a girl and hardly ever sees me - obviously...

I do loads on my own - trips away, coffee shops, restaurants when I'm away ... But I've got no similar people in my age bracket to kick around with - my fault as always seemed to have friends at least 10 to 20 years younger and now they've all sprogged... Maybe one of the problems of living and working in London - more people are younger working here?

There must be a "find a friend" website - I'll research this weekend as quite frankly I feel like Norman no mates right now - which of course is completely not true but it would be nice to know I could hang around with friends in the same situation as me if I wanted to...

Ha ha... Ok ... Self pity over ... Have lit a candle - Christmas smells - and put my fairy lights on - I always feel cheery with those on...

Have also got a chicken casserole in the oven which will hopefully last a few meals ... Unless I replace my Saddo life with food and scoff the lot in one hit!!! Lol... Oh wait! That's what I've been doing so best not then.

Sorry... I hope no one has bothered to read all this ... I just want to have it in writing so I can see how pathetic I am!!

 

[Dietkitty]

That confused me! Did you move this I think I need to walk down the hill and buy vodka!
But I'm assuming that you are now howling with laughter!

 

[Dietkitty]

And I didn't mean to press send then!
Was going to be all sympathetic but after all my confusion I've lost the plot!

 

[Alpaca]

Yes Lisa - I was wallowing so much I stuck it on Susie's diary not mine lol

 

[triage999]

Awwwwww hun! your not pathetic.... just feeling unloved..

I agree that you need to find ppl too, not necessarily your own age but with similar interests...

There are tonnes of groups to chose from, real life ones and not internet based! Have a look on notice boards, forums etc and get out there and mingle!

Life is far, far too short x

 

[Kat1e]

((hugs)) sweetie. Must be time for some nandos
Xxx

 

[Dietkitty]

You've already made a start, you have Susie and Katie!
Big hugs Di x

 

[Alpaca]

Sorry Lisa... I'm really am being pathetic... Although starting to feel more 'normal' now! Xx

 

[Dietkitty]

Don't be sorry love it's the way you feel! I do think that time of year is a factor too. I hate knowing that we've got so many dark cold nights ahead of us and I'm lucky enough to have someone to snuggle up to! (of course I mean my dog lol)

 

[4isnotenough]

Alpaca, your friends here on minis are gong to listen any time you need to share. I'm sorry things are making you feel low. HUGS x x x x

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins

 

[shellsmithcat]

Oh I'm sorry to hear your feeling like that - maybe a joke will cheer you up...

Why did the Wallaby cross the road?



Because it was the chickens day off - Boom, Boom

Yes your right it wasn't that funny. Lol.





Xx