Another LT male steps forth
- Thread starter Cherrycoke
- Start date
Cherrycoke
Full Member
Cheers guys & yeah Paula, the reward is good! 
Cherrycoke
Full Member
Where my comfort eating began.
I eat large portions, I always have done, I am the tallest of my 2 brothers, I also have a large frame, the comment I always received as a child was ooh he looks like a rugby player, and i did enjoy rugby so, i guess i fit the mould.
However this also meant that the larger food portion at the dinner table was given to me (like i needed more food), so as a teen growing up i had a voracious appetite. But I never overate, I never kept going after I felt full, i ofcourse had a pudding stomach (what child doesnt), but as a family we ate healthy, meat veg potato, nothing to extreme and dessert once a week. yoghurts and fruit always available. No sweets, no pop, etc...I wasnt a fat child, i had no problem with weight.
Skip forward to college, I maintain this lifestyle, perhaps creeping in a few more snacks here and there, but balanced and healthy, never happy with my shape, but nothing a gym membership couldn't have fixed (i didn't join a gym). Again not fat, but i was not a top off at the beach with friends guy, not confident. Quit drinking at 18 (yes i know), havent touched a drop since.
Skip ahead a few more years, life goes into turmoil, 5 years of very difficult times and I cope, but my vice becomes self harm whilst my descent into depression hits full speed. Not concerned with what I am eating nor with my weight, nothing changes, weight maintains and i am too busy to be bothered. but not obese, not clinically overweight, still unhappy with shape but normal.
Skip ahead...Life begins to become normal, counselling and mental health is on the rise, happiness creeps in and i feel normal(ish), meet a girl, get married, life is better...your happy you eat....weight pointed out by wife, join slimming world together, both lose weight.
Skip ahead...weight has crept up beyond the point it ever had before, Cousins wedding fast approaches, i go on CD, lose loads, look better than ever had, feel great, wife leaves me, divorce....eat, eat, eat, all manner of terrible binges and fast food, baskets of terrible food for one sitting, completely off the rails, i eat...weight increases, meet someone new, fall in love, get married, we cook, we eat, we live, we enjoy, we dine out, we live a life i hadnt before, we laugh, i am truely loved, but i cant stop eating, i continue eating bad foods.
December 2010: I catch a glimpse of myself in a shop window and stop dead in my tracks, that cant be me....i cant believe it. Horror of horrors, i look appalling! I come home and cry!
I walk into the chemist, and join lipotrim....I am never doing this again.
I realise now, I have no mental capacity to stop myself eating what i want, when i want, I have amazing willpower, never smoked, never done drugs, stopped drinking at 18, dont do this dont do that...but ask me what i want from kfc and ill say is it ok to have everything, should i have a shop sandwich before i go home for lunch, sure, why not...
If i could tap into what it is that stops me from stopping myself i think i would have the key. I have eaten for comfort, but it is true to say the biggest i have been (now) is at the same time that i am the happiest i have ever been. so comfort from what exactly?
I eat large portions, I always have done, I am the tallest of my 2 brothers, I also have a large frame, the comment I always received as a child was ooh he looks like a rugby player, and i did enjoy rugby so, i guess i fit the mould.
However this also meant that the larger food portion at the dinner table was given to me (like i needed more food), so as a teen growing up i had a voracious appetite. But I never overate, I never kept going after I felt full, i ofcourse had a pudding stomach (what child doesnt), but as a family we ate healthy, meat veg potato, nothing to extreme and dessert once a week. yoghurts and fruit always available. No sweets, no pop, etc...I wasnt a fat child, i had no problem with weight.
Skip forward to college, I maintain this lifestyle, perhaps creeping in a few more snacks here and there, but balanced and healthy, never happy with my shape, but nothing a gym membership couldn't have fixed (i didn't join a gym). Again not fat, but i was not a top off at the beach with friends guy, not confident. Quit drinking at 18 (yes i know), havent touched a drop since.
Skip ahead a few more years, life goes into turmoil, 5 years of very difficult times and I cope, but my vice becomes self harm whilst my descent into depression hits full speed. Not concerned with what I am eating nor with my weight, nothing changes, weight maintains and i am too busy to be bothered. but not obese, not clinically overweight, still unhappy with shape but normal.
Skip ahead...Life begins to become normal, counselling and mental health is on the rise, happiness creeps in and i feel normal(ish), meet a girl, get married, life is better...your happy you eat....weight pointed out by wife, join slimming world together, both lose weight.
Skip ahead...weight has crept up beyond the point it ever had before, Cousins wedding fast approaches, i go on CD, lose loads, look better than ever had, feel great, wife leaves me, divorce....eat, eat, eat, all manner of terrible binges and fast food, baskets of terrible food for one sitting, completely off the rails, i eat...weight increases, meet someone new, fall in love, get married, we cook, we eat, we live, we enjoy, we dine out, we live a life i hadnt before, we laugh, i am truely loved, but i cant stop eating, i continue eating bad foods.
December 2010: I catch a glimpse of myself in a shop window and stop dead in my tracks, that cant be me....i cant believe it. Horror of horrors, i look appalling! I come home and cry!
I walk into the chemist, and join lipotrim....I am never doing this again.
I realise now, I have no mental capacity to stop myself eating what i want, when i want, I have amazing willpower, never smoked, never done drugs, stopped drinking at 18, dont do this dont do that...but ask me what i want from kfc and ill say is it ok to have everything, should i have a shop sandwich before i go home for lunch, sure, why not...
If i could tap into what it is that stops me from stopping myself i think i would have the key. I have eaten for comfort, but it is true to say the biggest i have been (now) is at the same time that i am the happiest i have ever been. so comfort from what exactly?
nomoremuffintop
Gold Member
a hell of alot of that sounds like me cherry.
and i mean loads of it. the reason you eat? i feel the same. can so no to everything else but when its food ill have anything im 'allowed'.
i have never smoked or done drugs i dont drink unless special reasons.
iv been depressed (im bi-polar) self harmed and was always 'over weight' growing up even though we had healthy food around us. i developed young started puberty at 8-9years old which was always the excuse for my 'puppy fat' i wish i had done something about it years ago.
you are a strong man Cherry dont you ever get knocked back down again.
such a nice bloke, thanks for sharing that with us.
:hug99:
Cherrycoke
Full Member
Thanks guys!
PaulaJ
Exclamation mark abuser!
Wow! Cherry thanks for sharing... a very emotive (I think thats the right word?! lol) post and I think a lot us can relate to it!
We always had a healthy diet growing up, my parents were sticklers for it - we never had sweets (special occasions only) never had any fizzy drinks, fruit and yogurt for treats! I think this is the reason I am 29 and have never had any work done to my teeth - nothing!
HOWEVER... start getting pocket money, dinner money... the sneaky, secret eating began! I always had a lack of education regarding foods - my mum was always on diets (half-heartedly) and I think it gets very confusing in the world of dieting - on this one you should eat lots of pasta & low fat, this one all protein etc etc. I am also very lazy, quite laid back and found it difficult to deal with the increasing weight. Met my hubby who loved me for who I was and contentment set in and here I am today... morbidly obese :yuk:
We are doing something positive about our issues with weight, now we need to deal with the issues that got us to this state. Time to start getting our heads ready for eating again. xx
We always had a healthy diet growing up, my parents were sticklers for it - we never had sweets (special occasions only) never had any fizzy drinks, fruit and yogurt for treats! I think this is the reason I am 29 and have never had any work done to my teeth - nothing!
HOWEVER... start getting pocket money, dinner money... the sneaky, secret eating began! I always had a lack of education regarding foods - my mum was always on diets (half-heartedly) and I think it gets very confusing in the world of dieting - on this one you should eat lots of pasta & low fat, this one all protein etc etc. I am also very lazy, quite laid back and found it difficult to deal with the increasing weight. Met my hubby who loved me for who I was and contentment set in and here I am today... morbidly obese :yuk:
We are doing something positive about our issues with weight, now we need to deal with the issues that got us to this state. Time to start getting our heads ready for eating again. xx
Cherrycoke
Full Member
Very true Paula, and I am 36 with no work to my teeth either, yay our mums!
nomoremuffintop
Gold Member
Iv also never had any work done to my teeth ..... Until last year I cracked a tooth on a piece of bone in a donner kebab so I now have a gold crown
Cherrycoke
Full Member
You can't be in our gang then muff! Just kidding!
Cherrycoke
Full Member
You just put it back in my head, mmmmm kebab!!
Cherrycoke
Full Member
Mmmmm kebab!
Cherrycoke
Full Member
You forgot that I revealed I think of food more than boobs these days too hahahaha!
Cherrycoke
Full Member
It's cold and I'm hungry!
PaulaJ
Exclamation mark abuser!
Were you really hungry??? I'm cold too, just had a roasting hot bath, but my bathroom is so blimmin cold, the effects have worn off, going to get my granny hot water bottle now! Going to make my next shake with less water (I think LT call it a "mousse" ha!) because I fancy something "nice"
Hope you're feeling a bit better now? x
Hope you're feeling a bit better now? x
Cherrycoke
Full Member
They may call it mousse, I certainly don't! Ugh!
I am better thanks Paula! How's you?
I am better thanks Paula! How's you?
PaulaJ
Exclamation mark abuser!
Yeah fine, just plodding along fighting the cravings all the time as usual :sigh:
On a more positive note though, hubby got his act together today and called the doc re: LT so he'll be starting next Thurs, he's already starting to plan to cut carbs a few days before so he can each ketosis quicker. He'll be starting at the beginning of my week 6 and plans to follow it until my week 12
The "mousse" was disgusting and I should have learnt my lesson last time ha! Weigh in for me tomorrow, will let you know how I get on but it's only looking like a 2lb week for me so far. Boohoo! But it's OK it's still 2lbs of fat GONE!
Have a good evening x
On a more positive note though, hubby got his act together today and called the doc re: LT so he'll be starting next Thurs, he's already starting to plan to cut carbs a few days before so he can each ketosis quicker. He'll be starting at the beginning of my week 6 and plans to follow it until my week 12
The "mousse" was disgusting and I should have learnt my lesson last time ha! Weigh in for me tomorrow, will let you know how I get on but it's only looking like a 2lb week for me so far. Boohoo! But it's OK it's still 2lbs of fat GONE!
Have a good evening x
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