As you know we've autism in our family, with co-morbid mental health issues, but have been supported. For my son anyway, OH has mostly just been left to get on with it apart from when he presented at A&E suicidal. A thought, when I've been wanting to run away from my family I've looked at residential jobs in the Lady magazine. Posh house that the people aren't always in, living space to get yourself together ... or looking after people's elderly relatives. I don't suppose it's wonderful work but you get a home and money and possibly save up in a year for doing what you really want to.
Having said that, it is good to get the air cleared, hope you and T can make a go of it. Relate? But if not, however you decide to handle the future I wish you the very very best.
More stories. In the home ed world you come across some pretty 'challenging' children who are there because their families have realised they could never happily fit in at school. I knew two lads like this and one of them had a younger brother very similar, contemporaries of my boy. Most likely ADDH possibly plus something else. They drove their mums to distraction and everyone braced themselves for a visit with these lads. With the two brothers it was safest to meet up with them outdoors rather than in anyone's home, they could be that ... explosive. Tbh, our families experience with mental health support put one family off looking for help. She could have really done with it, her husband died suddenly ... DIFFICULT sons.
The other family decided to go off travelling and ended up in a home edding eco friendly community for a lot of the time after India and the world. To my absolute amazement these lads have all matured into pretty sober, respectful and apparantly quite nice lads. The one who's dad died suddenly would only sleep in his mum's bed till his teens, wouldn't go out on his own. Now he does some gardening and gets an income of his own and cycles on his own a few miles to visit friends. I've had reasonable conversations with him and, you know, don't feel concerns for his future as I did. Gosh, all these details of other people's lives. Good thing this site is anonymous.
Once the hormones have settled down for your boy and the stress of the GCSEs and college transition you are very very likely to see big changes in him. Please don't despair yet. The professionals like to tell me stories of miracles they have seen with youngsters they have worked with and of course, I take it all with a pinch of salt but there is hope. XXX Think about all the adult men you know. How many say they were difficult in their early years? I've met many. Like you say about O of course, there's no knowing exactly what they were like and if they were so far off the norm they were diagnoseable.
Anyway, link to the ad page of the Lady
Domestic UK | jobs | The Lady Recruitment | TLR | UK
Lisa x
