Food Addicts Not Anonymous

[krupskaya]

Aaaw Sue, you're lovely! You're quite right, I could be eating instead of typing lol... And my credit card could do with a rest too!

Luckily I have a friend I can talk to about my anxiety, but it doesn't make it go away. I've been prone to anxiety and depression since I was a teenager (the product of an abusive family). But it's only over the last 5 or so years I've been stuffing down my feelings with food. I used to be slim but using food as a coping mechanism means I've ballooned. Added to that being on psych meds that cause weight gain, it's been a disaster for my waistline!

Ah well, onwards and downwards. Thanks again for your kind reply. ZXXXX

 

[fillymum]

Hi Kristin,

Hello fellow addicts, how's things for everyone? I'm doing ok, weight trend mostly in the right direction, with a few hiccups.....

Hi Kristin, I am fine.........still an addict. Once an addict always an addict. I'm doing o.k. too apart from being STS last week. Glad to see you are fine apart from a few hiccups........try standing on your head and drinking a glass of water lol !!!!! If only it was that easy.

Have noticed that my "difficult times" often coincide with the week or so just before my period, so am wondering about contraception options that might regulate my hormones and save me some of the depression lows that I get.... Any thoughts?

I am well past this stage in my life but do remember that prior to period weeks I always craved sweet thing and most of all chocolate. Strange as now, even though I still love the taste of chocolate it makes me sick.

Speak to you doctor about hormone regulation but be careful with what is prescribed.

Also, am shockingly aware of how deeply wired my brain seems to be about mood=food! The other day, our oven door broke (again, sigh, and we've no money anyways least of all for blinking repairs, grrr, rant, rave) and IMMEDIATELY I felt this urge, a physical pull, to eat food! Heavy, filling, unhealthy, food.

The money thing is enough to drive you to the cake shop ! I have managed to train myself to grab a banana or a yogurt when I get "the urge"

I didn't, thank goodness, and told OH that's how I felt, but was still quite shocked to see that, despite all the changes I've made and improvements I'm still making, there's this deep seated "gut reaction" to any kind of stress/upset.

Personally I think it must be like any other kind of addiction be it alcohol, gambling or food. Don't be shocked by it just accept it but keep yourself aware of the fact that you have too live with it and you will always overcome it.

My life still revolves around food. I am always planning the next meal, next shop etc. The difference is these days I don't beat myself up over it. And my plans all revolve around SW.

Thinking it's not a case of that going away, but of dealing with it better......

This does happen and when it does it is great. It is like being reborn.

You are doing so well, stay that way.

Sunny thoughts to all,

hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxx

x

 

[kellierocks]

Kristin, I hear what you are saying about gut reaction. LAst week at work I was the axact same, and I got stuck into 5!!!pink wafers that happened to be in my car followed by cake and caramel square (work's coffee morning). The whole time I was aware of what I was doing. I was "coping" in my own usual unhealthy way. Shocking really.

 

[fillymum]

Me again. Been overeating steadily, methodically for nearly a week. Stresses and upsets, unexpected worries, all contributing. I really want to stop. It's just, there's almost an inevitability to it? Like I know it's going to happen, and only when I give in, eat all the bad stuff, do I feel calm. Stupid stupid stupid. Here's hoping for a brighter tomorrow!

Can you find an alternative way to deal with your stresses and upsets because unfortunately life is a rocky road and stressful times jump up and smack you in the face when you least expect it. Can you substitute the bad food to give you the calm you need in your life for good food or a physical activity.

Look at it this way, if you were an alcoholic or a smoker or a gambler and gave in to your addiction the consequences would be so grave, the downward spiral would begin again. You would be lost.

For people like us, to turn to food in times of trouble is almost inevitable. The secret is to either turn to less damaging food, I ate 3 yogurts one after the other 2 days ago, because I had that almost overwhelming desire to eat and eat. It did the trick, I was eating , though I have to be honest it was hard to stop at that.

Try and be prepared. I know that sounds stupid as we never know from one minute to the next what life has in store for us, but try to always have something you can eat with you. It takes willpower and you have proved you have that in abundance by what you have done so far. The easy way is to give in.

Now don't write this off as rubbish advice because all of us have been there. You are an intelligent girl and know that the only person you hurt when you slide is you.

I find that food that takes more eating. like a crisp apple or pear, hits the spot for me. I can almost hear you sigh and say but that is no substitute for a bar of chocolate or a packet of crisps, and no it isn't but unfortunately it has to be if you want to succeed.

Try to have a couple of cereal bars with you at work and use them as syns or you HEXB.

hugs Kristin xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[krupskaya]

Aw Kristin ((((Big Hugs)))). Not much advice to give except hang on in there. XXX

 

[kellierocks]

Kristin, we're all willing to jump into the hole with you and search for a way out. I guess what to remember is, it will pass (well my "episodes" usually do). What's the quickedt way out of here for you. And is there one thing you can do to look after yourself without guilt right now/ tomorrow?
Thinking on ya K.
This moment will pass

 

[anita1975]

my name is anita and i am a food addict.

i had a packet of space invaders yesterday. they were in my syns, but i just wanted them so bad. had pasta for suppa and weatabix (choc) for after. wasn't hungary just need them. after looking back on the day. i now understand these space invaders were a crutch. i am out of work, and have not had a job interview for over a month. hadn't really been thinking about work. until hubby mentioned about not having interviews for a while.

not his faulty, but was really fedup and it was like a slap in the face has had not been thinking about jobs for ages, just applying and not worrying. felt low and sad. used these crisps to give comfort.

low today, nothing much doing. done all house work, dog walked, finished painting stepson bedroom. hubby back from work and suggested we go out to a harvester for dinner. we can do this on SW plan. but then we both said, oh we can treat ourselves and have a pudding.

hubby had a bad day at work (works for himselves), now trying to tile the bathroom which he hates and I am well and truly fedup of not working.

realisation of want something naughty to make us feel better, which is short term. the only thing that will acheive that is getting job offers, hubby doing a job he likes. perhaps get someone in to tile bathroom (he he).

we are not going out to have the pudding, we are going out for some quality time together (which we don't get a lot of lately) and to enjoy a steak. understand craving for pudding, the craving is there. we acknowledge it, but it has no power over us.

feeling happier, and a little bit of control gained.

 

[anita1975]

hi kristin1 had a great evening thanks. enjoyed out steak, and didn't not feel in the need to have a large pud afterward. hubby and i had a good chat about comfort eating, and the need to feel good about our selfs. the thread as inspired both of use. so if we feel we need comfort food. we will talk about the need to each other, and try and combat the need together not matter what time of day. and have a hug instead.

so if any of you members feel the need to chat about comfort eating or sometimes just need a hug. let me know. thanks once again.

 

[fillymum]

Hi Anita, I have conditioned myself to look upon my favourite yogurts, an onion omelette, a nectarine, my own recipe quorn burgers, kept cold in the fridge for nibble times, as comfort food. It was really hard but works so any damage is minimal.

I agree with Kristin, well done in all you have achieved.

We are like minded in the respect of positive thinking. My motto in life is " Take the positive out of everything "

 

[kellierocks]

Just saw old class mates on facebook, I moved away from them, I never did feel "good enough" or part of the group. They were toxic to me, maybe not them themselves but my relationship to them (more me I mean). I have an event where a lot of them will be there at the end of November, I've just realised, regardless of my weight I still feel not good enough, feel less than. I suppose when I see them, I am the me I was then.
I am strong and confident, why do I feel like this??

Cannot eat, need to run tomorrow.

 

[fillymum]

Just saw old class mates on facebook, I moved away from them, I never did feel "good enough" or part of the group. They were toxic to me, maybe not them themselves but my relationship to them (more me I mean). I have an event where a lot of them will be there at the end of November, I've just realised, regardless of my weight I still feel not good enough, feel less than. I suppose when I see them, I am the me I was then.
I am strong and confident, why do I feel like this??

Cannot eat, need to run tomorrow.

Listen to me madam !!!!! You are as good as the next person and better than a lot.

Do you really, really want to go to this re-union ?? If it is so uncomfortable for you perhaps you would be better off turning your back on it.

You are a bright, attractive girl who has proved to herself that you can achieve what you want to achieve. Look how well you are doing with your weight loss and exercise programme............... and you are doing that for you not them.

If you have grown and feel it would not be to much of an ordeal for you go. Go and enjoy yourself. But if it is going to be traumatic for you stay away.

hugs from me xxxxx

 

[kellierocks]

Guys thank you! It means a lot to hear that. Sometimes I think we need our ego rubbed a little! Well I did this strange thing (bear with me!) The three that I saw in the photo are/ were nice ppl, I know this, it was more the overall group dynamic. So a tool I saw in some of those less stress books- I thought on them whilst taking deep breaths and shone white light on them, and the feelings actually reduced and have stayed reduced. I think it was the idea of focusing on them not as enemies but as people who are living their own lives, their own ups and downs. It re-adjusted my thinking.

The event is a birthday of a lovely girl, she has always been kind, and while she was overweight too, she never let it stand in her way, a really gracious person, so I want to be there for her.

Plus I will have just run a marathon. What better way to go back? (married to George Clooney, Chief Exec of a FTSE 100 company and 2 beautiful kids would have been nice though, oh and with a humanitarian award nat)

 

[fillymum]

What a good way to start a Monday morning, reading your positive and cheerful post.

In this fantastic frame of mind you will go and have a great time.

You are a star !!!

Good luck with the marathon............

hugs xxxx

 

[Monkey_Monkey_Underpants]

Only just found this thread, but hey -
I'm Sarah and I'm a food addict.

At the moment I'm doing well on SW, and managing to stay pretty much on plan, but, like Sue, I'm never, ever, not thinking about food.
Even though I'm currently slimming, food, and my relationship with it, rules my life.
I don't know how to stop it.
Is it only us "low self esteem" people who get like this?
Why is it so difficult to react normally to an essential life-maintaining process (eating, I mean)?
And will I still be like this, every day, for the whole of my life, even if (no - sorry - I must say "when") I achieve my weight-loss goal?

 

[fillymum]

Hi Sarah, welcome from me as well. So glad you found us.

I think once an addict always an addict. With the help of SW and this site,I now focus on the *right* food. But focus I do . I am almost planning the next meal before I have finished the one I am eating.

It is great to know that my whole mind set is so different now. I no longer worry about thinking about and enjoying everything to do with food cos I know I am in control of the food and not the food in control of me.

Please keep coming back to us on this thread. It is so cleansing..............

hugs xxxx

 

[kellierocks]

Hello sarah ( we say in unison)

I had a bad day today so ate a big bag of sweets.
I am managing food better, but still in stress I turn to the food.

I often wonder too, but I do think, I will always be a food addict and will have to control my eating, maybe less consciously but still, I think it will always be an issue.

 

[big em]

yeh that makes a lot of sense,

you will be disgusted but i must share this as i feel a bit insane

i know it wasnt right to do this ive been sitting thinking about if for ages tonight

im quite strict usually on sw and have lost 1st 2 lbs
however it all started yesterday i was at a dinner with family and it was a set meal so i had to have what was put out as my family had congratulated me for doing so well and asked me to quit for a night
menu
quiche with salad (not too bad)
then chips and battered fish (bad)
then an icea cream and fruit in a wafer basket for dessert (bad)
so when i got home decided to have a few celebration sweeties
followed by a roll and crisps salt and vinegar crisps and some strawberry laces

today in work our managers brought in cakes to share and they done there rounds a few times as they bought far too much so i had quite a few regretably
wait for it.......

i started of nicely with a bowl of weetabix 2x

then it spiralled from there i had......


1 ww brownie
4 flapjacks
mini dognut
lge donut
twix
sml cookie
2 cups coffee
bowl cereal lge
packet of hoola hoops
4 crackers and butter
handfull of s&v pringles

after all of that i went for a bath and with the heat of the bath and the ache of my gut i threw up

I am so fed up and ragin with myself ..

i feel like i had no control the same thing happened after my 21st I lost about 1 to 1.5 stone

then mucked it all up

im really scared i hate that i feel like i need to do that its really extreme but im not in control its like the only thing on your mind is the next thing thats going into that mouth of mine

i mean throughout the diet ive had moments of weekness taking a handful of nuts then realising my mistake and spitting them out,

being raging at my mum cause shes put a sneaky syn in a pasta meal or something.

can anyone relate

i need to get back on track tomorrow but im worried

any help or anyone that wants to bang me on the head please do

 

[Monkey_Monkey_Underpants]

Nobody wants to bang you on the head, Em. We just feel for you. It's so hard to pull yourself up once you start to slide. Try not to beat yourself up: think of how brilliantly you've done on SW so far, and then try to put the last couple of days on one side - don't worry about syns that have already happened, you can't change them and that's what flexibility's for. Just see if you can take tomorrow one meal, or one snack at a time, and see how well you've done by the end of the day.

We've all been there.

Do you have any support, other than on here?

 

[fillymum]

Hi and welcome to this thread.

You must never feel disgusted with yourself. That is such a negative feeling and only makes you feel worse so more likely to despair and cheat again. Feel annoyed with yourself and channel that energy in the right way.

What is done is past history, forget it from this minute on. Today is the first day of your new start.

You know you can do it. You have proved that. You should be proud of what you have achieved so far.

Can you have sweet SW friendly things to hand for when you get the munchies or do what a lot of slimmers do. Make up a container of diced apple, carrot, celery etc. to take to work and snack on.

Try to change your mindset, try to crave goodies. I know that is so hard at times but once you have got there you will not look back.

I gather you live at home with your mum. Take her to one side and have a chat with her. Make her your ally, tell her just how much it distresses you to go off plan. Ask her to help you. The problem with mums is they always see their children as being lovely as they are. If she prepares your food you need her working with you.

It is a matter of will power...............you know you can do it.

Congratulations on being so honest and able to discuss it and ask for help.

hugs xx

 

[kellierocks]

Em
Sue makes a lot of sense. Please stop being so hard on yourself, you need to learn to love yourself. It was a bad 2 days. 2 bad days do not a fat person make, so stop beating yourself up. Even thin ppl overeat at times, its just they get back on track, letting go of the bad days or the treats. If you are like me in any way, being awful to yourself is more likely to mean you will eat more. Love yourself today ansa say you will only feed yourself good healthy food.

As for your mum, again sue is right, talk to her about how you feel today. Explain that you cannot always have a night off as it can lead to mroe overeating after the event and that every meal is about getting it as right to your plan as possible. You need her in your corner, otherwise you will have to cook every meal yourself.

Please let yesterday go, and today love yourself for the fabulous being that you are.