Hi everyone who reads my diary
I’ve lost 8lbs! I know a lot of it will be water and that next weeks loss probably won’t be as much, but I’ve lost over half a stone!! If I lose only 3lbs a week from now on, then by Christmas I’ll have lost a stone and a half! I’m definitely going to stick to it now, not that I was even thinking of giving up, but this weight loss has made me want to see even more. So far, apart from feeling a bit weaker than normal and sometimes light-headed, I’m managing great. I did have a bar yesterday which my tastebuds appreciated but my stomach didn't. Gurgling and cramps, horrible.
Yesterday I took his stuff to London. It didn’t look much piled in the hallway but loading it into one taxi, then out, then onto the train, off the train, dragging it what felt like half a mile through the station to a taxi rank, then into another taxi, it seemed to grow all the time. Definitely more than enough exercise for the week and feeling light-headed didn’t help at all.
I’d decided to drop it off at his office, well at reception. I didn’t want to see him. But on the journey in the taxi I started feeling more and more sick and shaky and really didn’t even want to go into the reception bit. So I asked the driver if I gave him the details of who it was for and an extra big tip, would he take it into reception for me? And he did. Took him two trips to the cab and back to unload it though, so shows you how pumped up with adrenaline I was that I’d been able to drag it around, (he was a bit more gentle with things than me though!) He said they weren’t very happy in reception to take it, but he told them who it was for and that delivery had been paid for so he wasn’t taking it back (London cabbies, don't you love em!) On the way back to the station after I’d confirmed the cabbies suspicions about what I was doing, he said he would’ve asked for the fare from my ex if I’d let him know earlier. Glad I didn’t, I didn’t want any reason for my ex to come to the cab and see me there.
On the train on the way back I got a text from him saying, ‘Please don’t do this! I will do anything to make things right again x’
Well that single kiss was like a red rag to a bull. How dare he kiss me in any form at all after what he’s done? I texted him back saying ‘You’ll do anything? Okay remove my numbers from your phone then spend the rest of your life knowing that when you see me I will look through you and when you speak I won’t hear you’.
It took me about fifty miles to think up a message that would be IT, the end, over, finito, and I think I got it with that. I had of course immediately thought of replying, ‘You can go fcuk yourself,’ which might also have got the point across, and also with a lot less thumb strain.
Thank you to everyone who has written me supportive messages on here. They really are appreciated.
Skinnymongoose, lucky you living in NZ for so long. We've done the sightseeing stuff previously so this time is going to be mostly a beachbumming holiday. With it being very much a last minute decision to go and only having 4 weeks there (2 of which I still need to sort out with my daughter’s school, arghh), we’re not stopping off anywhere.
Chrysallis
