Here i am! *waves* - Brewin'a'Baby & Staying Slim! 2011 xx
- Thread starter Littleslimmingbee
- Start date
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
Lord help me. I ahve just arrived at neices birthday party to be faced with not alot of food with the calorie content under a bazzziilllioooon.
Iv had a kellogs fibre plus HEB, 1 apple, 1 muller and some pinapple chunks for breaky
iv had a jacket pot with baked beans and cheese HEA
and now i have to last the afternoon with very little fruit and veg. I WILL BE STRONG!
homemade curry (1syn) with brown rice and vlf natural yog tonight. i can do it.. i can do it.. i can do it..
BE STRONG
Iv had a kellogs fibre plus HEB, 1 apple, 1 muller and some pinapple chunks for breaky
iv had a jacket pot with baked beans and cheese HEA
and now i have to last the afternoon with very little fruit and veg. I WILL BE STRONG!
homemade curry (1syn) with brown rice and vlf natural yog tonight. i can do it.. i can do it.. i can do it..
BE STRONG
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
deffinatly used all my syns today..
munched on carrot sticks, grapes, strawberries and cherry toms all afternoon, but did have a few crisps, some chocolates and a tsp of dip. including the 1syn of curry paste in my curry.. i think around 15 syns. but i avoided cake and could have been SO much worse. Im feeling in control. GO ME.
Im knackered, getting into 'proper' full time will take me some time to ajust, but im forcing myself to really plan ahead, and actually make my food before hand when i know that i either need it to avoid making bad descions, or that i wont ahve time the next day. Im also finding it easier to stick to my plan. My only issue is syns: i cant keep low syn stuff in the house, because i cant be trusted, but because i dont have hardly any proper treats, its either hardly any syns, or all of them plus more? not sure whether im ready to tackle this one, so il deal with it at a later date but somthing to keep in mind. Working so much is keeping me distracted and on plan, so im glad to be back at work. Really love my job, and although my rule is to never bring work home with me, i ahve done this weekend in order to catch up with myself as i have had SO much on, iv not done enough prep. But i hope within a few weeks il be super organised and on top of it. Iv already done a bit of prep for the next 3 weeks worth so thats a headstart on it all already.
Im feeling good. Although im still unsure of using my syns more, i am making an effort too. I suppose it helps that i dont care how fast it comes off at the mo ( i say at the mo because im not fussed right now, but have a tendancy to get frustrated!) so im finding it easier and more relaxed with it all.
I think its helped that iv decided to just aim to get back to my oringain target of 10st 1 to begin with, which is only 3 lbs away. I lost the extra half a stone for my 5stone award because it was summer and i wanted to feel extra confident, but now were coming into winter im feeling a little more relaxed with it. I will aim to get back there eventually, but for now 3lbs seems far more managable. Im just taking it as it comes.. learning to love my body no matter what.
x
munched on carrot sticks, grapes, strawberries and cherry toms all afternoon, but did have a few crisps, some chocolates and a tsp of dip. including the 1syn of curry paste in my curry.. i think around 15 syns. but i avoided cake and could have been SO much worse. Im feeling in control. GO ME.
Im knackered, getting into 'proper' full time will take me some time to ajust, but im forcing myself to really plan ahead, and actually make my food before hand when i know that i either need it to avoid making bad descions, or that i wont ahve time the next day. Im also finding it easier to stick to my plan. My only issue is syns: i cant keep low syn stuff in the house, because i cant be trusted, but because i dont have hardly any proper treats, its either hardly any syns, or all of them plus more? not sure whether im ready to tackle this one, so il deal with it at a later date but somthing to keep in mind. Working so much is keeping me distracted and on plan, so im glad to be back at work. Really love my job, and although my rule is to never bring work home with me, i ahve done this weekend in order to catch up with myself as i have had SO much on, iv not done enough prep. But i hope within a few weeks il be super organised and on top of it. Iv already done a bit of prep for the next 3 weeks worth so thats a headstart on it all already.
Im feeling good. Although im still unsure of using my syns more, i am making an effort too. I suppose it helps that i dont care how fast it comes off at the mo ( i say at the mo because im not fussed right now, but have a tendancy to get frustrated!) so im finding it easier and more relaxed with it all.
I think its helped that iv decided to just aim to get back to my oringain target of 10st 1 to begin with, which is only 3 lbs away. I lost the extra half a stone for my 5stone award because it was summer and i wanted to feel extra confident, but now were coming into winter im feeling a little more relaxed with it. I will aim to get back there eventually, but for now 3lbs seems far more managable. Im just taking it as it comes.. learning to love my body no matter what.
x
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
Breakfast: 1 cherry mullerlight, 3 sweetonion ryvitas 28g cheese HEA and HEB 1 apple
will have some watermelon later, mm
chicken wrapped in bacon, with sw roasties, brocolie, carrots and peas with some gravey 1 syn mmmmmmmmm
xx
will have some watermelon later, mm
chicken wrapped in bacon, with sw roasties, brocolie, carrots and peas with some gravey 1 syn mmmmmmmmm
xx
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
im frickin exhuasted, but have forced myself to get up and make tomorrows lunch for work- i had planned scotch eggs but couldnt feel my motivation going that far- so i have a new potato,tuna and egg salad with a fruit salad of apple, melon and strawbs. I think thats pretty good going.
im very nervous for tomorrow, as my art classes start properly. But feel all this is very good distraction from food, itl be monday tomorow.. which means only monday, tuesday and then its WI day
i feel like iv been quite in control.. ALMOST slipped up today.
i went into mums for a quick visit, not even thinking she would have left over food.. they were all eating maccy d's (which i ahvnt had in over 2 years horah for me!) and so the fact it was maccys rather than just the smell of takeaway that hit me. . then i saw the box of chocs. I ate 3 chocs, and a line of galaxy. . iv counted this as my entire 15 syns, the thought of ' oh screw it iv ruined it now ' very almost took over, but i told myself it was OK.
i had 1 syn of gravey and that was it after.. so im still feeling in control, and although il have smaller losses now that iv upped my syns a fair bit from what i was using, i think im happier this way for now.
Even resisted when OH ate maccys in front of me when i was REALLY hungry, and when MIL came round with the biccys before Tea. go me!
today:
1 cherry mullerlight, 3 ryvitas, 28g cheese HEA and HEB 1 apple
1 apple
the choc (dum dum dum..)
watermelon
chicken wrapped in bacon, roast pots, brocolie and carrots with 1syn gravey
1 apple
im very nervous for tomorrow, as my art classes start properly. But feel all this is very good distraction from food, itl be monday tomorow.. which means only monday, tuesday and then its WI day
i feel like iv been quite in control.. ALMOST slipped up today. i went into mums for a quick visit, not even thinking she would have left over food.. they were all eating maccy d's (which i ahvnt had in over 2 years horah for me!) and so the fact it was maccys rather than just the smell of takeaway that hit me. . then i saw the box of chocs. I ate 3 chocs, and a line of galaxy. . iv counted this as my entire 15 syns, the thought of ' oh screw it iv ruined it now ' very almost took over, but i told myself it was OK.
i had 1 syn of gravey and that was it after.. so im still feeling in control, and although il have smaller losses now that iv upped my syns a fair bit from what i was using, i think im happier this way for now.
Even resisted when OH ate maccys in front of me when i was REALLY hungry, and when MIL came round with the biccys before Tea. go me!
today:
1 cherry mullerlight, 3 ryvitas, 28g cheese HEA and HEB 1 apple
1 apple
the choc (dum dum dum..)
watermelon
chicken wrapped in bacon, roast pots, brocolie and carrots with 1syn gravey
1 apple
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
Thanks karen! up and down is deffinatly the word.
Having a manic time at work. quick update:
SIL had just got a job with us (gymboree bristol) my boss has been traininbg her over the weeks so she cant start running monday classes by herself (with another asistant)
Today was her first day, and shes so upset. I was upstairs running my art class, so wasnt there to witness first hand but can deffinatly see it happeneing. Apparently alot of people didnt turn up/ were poorly and so all the classes were quite quiet,.. anyways, SIL thought (as did i?) that she would be running all the classes by her self and becky would just be there to monitor and give feedback. however, it appears boss totally took over, made SIL feel like poo, nitpicked and put her down all day.
I know my boss quite well now, but although SIL tried to talk about it boss wasnt really hearing her. I think boss paniced that she wouldnt be able to keep the new trials that had turned up and instinct took in to take over.. but there was new communication between them and then a few comments she made after really threw salt in the wound.
iv just had a phonecall from SIL who is SO upset, and is going to phone boss later. SIL is saying she thinks she made a mistake and doesnt think she can continue, which is really sad and i feel responsible as shes now jacked in her other job and will essentially be jobless, even though its not my fault. Boss needs to be told, as if SIL does leave and it happens again we'l get no where. My boss is a lovley lovley lady and the franchise has done amazingly well in the short time its been open!
I know its really difficult for both but im feeling a bit stuck, as on the other hand my new art classes started properly today and really did go well.
I really hope things go okay, as im not really looking forward to work tomorrow now. deary me.
anyways, i did really well today and food wise also.. however im trying not to waver after todays stuff. Iv got zumba tonight, which i have no motivation for but have skipped out on my friend for it the last few weeks and HAVE to go.
x
Having a manic time at work. quick update:
SIL had just got a job with us (gymboree bristol) my boss has been traininbg her over the weeks so she cant start running monday classes by herself (with another asistant)
Today was her first day, and shes so upset. I was upstairs running my art class, so wasnt there to witness first hand but can deffinatly see it happeneing. Apparently alot of people didnt turn up/ were poorly and so all the classes were quite quiet,.. anyways, SIL thought (as did i?) that she would be running all the classes by her self and becky would just be there to monitor and give feedback. however, it appears boss totally took over, made SIL feel like poo, nitpicked and put her down all day.
I know my boss quite well now, but although SIL tried to talk about it boss wasnt really hearing her. I think boss paniced that she wouldnt be able to keep the new trials that had turned up and instinct took in to take over.. but there was new communication between them and then a few comments she made after really threw salt in the wound.
iv just had a phonecall from SIL who is SO upset, and is going to phone boss later. SIL is saying she thinks she made a mistake and doesnt think she can continue, which is really sad and i feel responsible as shes now jacked in her other job and will essentially be jobless, even though its not my fault. Boss needs to be told, as if SIL does leave and it happens again we'l get no where. My boss is a lovley lovley lady and the franchise has done amazingly well in the short time its been open!
I know its really difficult for both but im feeling a bit stuck, as on the other hand my new art classes started properly today and really did go well.
I really hope things go okay, as im not really looking forward to work tomorrow now. deary me.
anyways, i did really well today and food wise also.. however im trying not to waver after todays stuff. Iv got zumba tonight, which i have no motivation for but have skipped out on my friend for it the last few weeks and HAVE to go.
x
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
3 ryvitas, 28g cheese HEA and HEB, apple, muller
new pots, spring onion, cucumber, toms and hardboiled eggs with light mayo 1.5
melon and strawbs for after
1 apple, 1 bowl of mushy peas (random tea i know lol)
1 peice of choc 2 syns
new pots, spring onion, cucumber, toms and hardboiled eggs with light mayo 1.5
melon and strawbs for after
1 apple, 1 bowl of mushy peas (random tea i know lol)
1 peice of choc 2 syns
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
frick frick frick, old habits die hard!!
muller, 3 ryvitas, 28g cheese
mixed bean mexican chilli, rice and vlf yogurt
watermelon..
then.. sweets, chocolate.. cereal. frick frick frick, almost an entire week 100% and then i go and ruin it so close to WI!!!! going to bed before i eat us out of house and home.
muller, 3 ryvitas, 28g cheese
mixed bean mexican chilli, rice and vlf yogurt
watermelon..
then.. sweets, chocolate.. cereal. frick frick frick, almost an entire week 100% and then i go and ruin it so close to WI!!!! going to bed before i eat us out of house and home.
Hi Fern!!
Found your diary - you have done soooo well!! And your before/ after pics are brilliant - you look so fab!!
Ahh dont worry about one bad night just be extra good the next day (why is that so much easier to say to someone else - ha!).
Hope weigh in went ok and you managed to not eat the house I am so terrible with cereal I had to stop buying it.... my hubby just looks at me as if im crazy if I say i'm being naughty and having a treat and then start munching cornflakes - apparently cornflakes dound count as a 'treat' grrrr you can tell he has never had to diet
Found your diary - you have done soooo well!! And your before/ after pics are brilliant - you look so fab!!
Ahh dont worry about one bad night just be extra good the next day (why is that so much easier to say to someone else - ha!).
Hope weigh in went ok and you managed to not eat the house
I am so terrible with cereal I had to stop buying it.... my hubby just looks at me as if im crazy if I say i'm being naughty and having a treat and then start munching cornflakes - apparently cornflakes dound count as a 'treat' grrrr you can tell he has never had to diet
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
^ haha totally agree..
1lb off for me tonight, im okay with that. i really am.
Onto another week
here i gooooo
1lb off for me tonight, im okay with that. i really am.
Onto another week
here i gooooo
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
Oofft. Working full time and having commitments to my art class means my evenings and general free time is spent desperatly trying to grab hold of it all and get on top of it. House work is falling behiind slightly but OH is trying his best to help.. aswell as my other commitments (looking after two little boys on a thurs, hairdressing jobs on side, looking after family! have joes nieces over for the entire night tomorrow) however i am forcing myself to pre-plan and actually make food.
today: kellogs fibre plus, shape yog, apple HEB
apple
choc 3syns
1 chewing gum 1/2 syn
mixed mexican bean chilli ( have no officially eaten so much im actually a little sick at the thought, not for a very long time again!) cheese HEA
watermelon, green and red grapes
apple
carrot sticks
hartleys jelly pot 1/2 syn
chewing gum 1/2 syn
brown rice with real chilli con carni (MY FAVE MMM ) with vlf natural yog 1/2 syn
choc orange muller
man that looks like iv eaten LOADS
5 proper syns, prob a few more for picking lol
check me out, im using my syns
today: kellogs fibre plus, shape yog, apple HEB
apple
choc 3syns
1 chewing gum 1/2 syn
mixed mexican bean chilli ( have no officially eaten so much im actually a little sick at the thought, not for a very long time again!) cheese HEA
watermelon, green and red grapes
apple
carrot sticks
hartleys jelly pot 1/2 syn
chewing gum 1/2 syn
brown rice with real chilli con carni (MY FAVE MMM ) with vlf natural yog 1/2 syn
choc orange muller
man that looks like iv eaten LOADS
5 proper syns, prob a few more for picking
lol check me out, im using my syns
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
ooft! lets not talk about last night. I blame the ellebear for leaving me, its all her fault! damn her for going on her hollibobs and leaving me to fend for myself against pizza and galaxy!!!
Starting again!
Mullerlight, apple. water
2 slices wholmeal HEB, baked beans, 1 egg and 2 tsp of light flora 2syns.
brown rice, 1/2syn curry, vlf yogurt planned for lateeerrrrs)
Starting again!
Mullerlight, apple. water
2 slices wholmeal HEB, baked beans, 1 egg and 2 tsp of light flora 2syns.
brown rice, 1/2syn curry, vlf yogurt planned for lateeerrrrs
)
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
okay, im being good meal wise but really struggeling to rein myself in syn wise. Lots of cake tasting and wedding fayre and after fri eve's disaster im looking at a gain, which im gutted as i really want to be back on track. it appears im an all or nothing kinda gal when it comes to my syns, trying to incorperate them just leads to going overboard.
x
x
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
Eurgh, i actually want to bang my head against the wall.
Littleslimmingbee
Gold Member
Okay Ladies and Gents: Its the Christmas Countdown.
Im here to face the music, Last night i forced myself to go to class and weigh in.. despite another in excusable week wasted on eating crap and making a real half arsed attempt to sort it out. I gained yet another 2.5lbs, bringing me to 10st 5.5lbs- a pound heavier than when i came back from holiday.
Im 4lbs away from the 4.5stone target weight, I now have 11 lbs to loose to get back to 9stone 8.5. I so badly want to be back there for christmas. I know that this is asking alot, for many it IS dooable.. but i know that i struggled damn hard to get to my 5stone award, and i dont think i'l average a pound a week. Maybe half. I am going to try my damn hardest.
I have made some progress, despite eating things off plan.. (e.g. chocolate) my meals have been 100%. I have manged to really work on not throwing the whole week away, and eating everything off plan. Whereas before, the minute i'd eat even a cube of choc, the whole week would fall apart. and i wouldnt even glance at an apple. The gains could have been worse if i hadnt have made the effort to keep my meals okay.. but the gains are bad enough and i am SO dissapointed with myself, even mad.. I just throw away week after week, knowing that i care but burying it under the desire to just give up. My motivation and willpower is so unbelievably weak, its amazing iv not just got 5stone to lose again. Im fed up of resolving to start again, and managing a week or two before letting it slip again. This is time is it. I needed this to make me appreciate what i had before, being at target an' all. . but i have to get back there now. I deserve to struggle because i took it for granted.
I know that im on holiday nov 22nd-26th.. but its self catering so i know if i really put my mind to it, im going to be perfectly fine. of course, i cant pretend christmas doesnt start untill the 25th of dec, there will be christmas meals and parties.. but i have to plan, have stronger will power this time.. I know i can do this, iv done it before. I just have to find that within myself again.
Today is day one, 12 weeks till christmas. Id love to 12 lbs lighter but i am aiming to be at the lower end of my original target weight first. So 6/7 lbs. I am still toying with the idea of just getting back to my original 10st 1 target as i am happy at that weight too.. but i know im happier at the 5st target more, but that seems like a long way away right now.
Breakfast:
Two alpen lights HEB, Strawberry mullerlight
1 apple.
Lunch: 1 packet of bachelors low fat chicken supernoodles.
1.5litres of water.
tea: Mozzerela with red onion, garlic and balsamic vinegar wrapped in parma ham, with an italian mixed leaf salad, tomatoes and cucumber with a squeeze of lemon juice HEA
1 apple
1 choc orange muller
Syns:
Parma ham: I believe 1/2 a syn per slice? Will be having 3 slices, so 1.5syns. Will double check.
Hot chocolate with dollop of milk 3 syns
splodge of bbq sauce 0.5syn
5 syns exactly
It doesnt seem alot admittedly, but i think in order for this to work for me i have to go back to what i know.
I have tried to incorperate my syns properly again, i just cant do it. Trying to have more than 5 a day just sends me off track.. and if im having a wednesday off.. its not that im not using them, im using them weekley rather than dailey i suppose.
Water always boosts my losses, and im working on the 'only eating when im hungry' theory again, which really helped on the final push to T last time.. my appetite isnt the same as it was when i was bigger, i love my big portions but i dont need them.. i proved that last time when i was really listening to my body.. really listening.. not just telling myself that i needed it.
Im going to be okay. I know how to do this. It just my willpower that needs tweaking....
Thanks for listening to my rambelings guys.
Its taken alot for me to come back to you all today, i really do love you guys for all you have done for me.. but i feel like my diary is just so up and down, i must just sound like im crazy and right now, i genuinly feel i cant help anyone or advise when my own journey has taken such a slump. Maybe when im back to T and i look back on this expierance and learn from it, i will.. but right now.. i am no role model.
Love to you all. Will update as i go as always.
*blows a kiss* xxx
Im here to face the music, Last night i forced myself to go to class and weigh in.. despite another in excusable week wasted on eating crap and making a real half arsed attempt to sort it out. I gained yet another 2.5lbs, bringing me to 10st 5.5lbs- a pound heavier than when i came back from holiday.
Im 4lbs away from the 4.5stone target weight, I now have 11 lbs to loose to get back to 9stone 8.5. I so badly want to be back there for christmas. I know that this is asking alot, for many it IS dooable.. but i know that i struggled damn hard to get to my 5stone award, and i dont think i'l average a pound a week. Maybe half. I am going to try my damn hardest.
I have made some progress, despite eating things off plan.. (e.g. chocolate) my meals have been 100%. I have manged to really work on not throwing the whole week away, and eating everything off plan. Whereas before, the minute i'd eat even a cube of choc, the whole week would fall apart. and i wouldnt even glance at an apple. The gains could have been worse if i hadnt have made the effort to keep my meals okay.. but the gains are bad enough and i am SO dissapointed with myself, even mad.. I just throw away week after week, knowing that i care but burying it under the desire to just give up. My motivation and willpower is so unbelievably weak, its amazing iv not just got 5stone to lose again. Im fed up of resolving to start again, and managing a week or two before letting it slip again. This is time is it. I needed this to make me appreciate what i had before, being at target an' all. . but i have to get back there now. I deserve to struggle because i took it for granted.
I know that im on holiday nov 22nd-26th.. but its self catering so i know if i really put my mind to it, im going to be perfectly fine. of course, i cant pretend christmas doesnt start untill the 25th of dec, there will be christmas meals and parties.. but i have to plan, have stronger will power this time.. I know i can do this, iv done it before. I just have to find that within myself again.
Today is day one, 12 weeks till christmas. Id love to 12 lbs lighter but i am aiming to be at the lower end of my original target weight first. So 6/7 lbs. I am still toying with the idea of just getting back to my original 10st 1 target as i am happy at that weight too.. but i know im happier at the 5st target more, but that seems like a long way away right now.
Breakfast:
Two alpen lights HEB, Strawberry mullerlight
1 apple.
Lunch: 1 packet of bachelors low fat chicken supernoodles.
1.5litres of water.
tea: Mozzerela with red onion, garlic and balsamic vinegar wrapped in parma ham, with an italian mixed leaf salad, tomatoes and cucumber with a squeeze of lemon juice HEA
1 apple
1 choc orange muller
Syns:
Parma ham: I believe 1/2 a syn per slice? Will be having 3 slices, so 1.5syns. Will double check.
Hot chocolate with dollop of milk 3 syns
splodge of bbq sauce 0.5syn
5 syns exactly
It doesnt seem alot admittedly, but i think in order for this to work for me i have to go back to what i know.
I have tried to incorperate my syns properly again, i just cant do it. Trying to have more than 5 a day just sends me off track.. and if im having a wednesday off.. its not that im not using them, im using them weekley rather than dailey i suppose.
Water always boosts my losses, and im working on the 'only eating when im hungry' theory again, which really helped on the final push to T last time.. my appetite isnt the same as it was when i was bigger, i love my big portions but i dont need them.. i proved that last time when i was really listening to my body.. really listening.. not just telling myself that i needed it.
Im going to be okay. I know how to do this. It just my willpower that needs tweaking....
Thanks for listening to my rambelings guys.
Its taken alot for me to come back to you all today, i really do love you guys for all you have done for me.. but i feel like my diary is just so up and down, i must just sound like im crazy and right now, i genuinly feel i cant help anyone or advise when my own journey has taken such a slump. Maybe when im back to T and i look back on this expierance and learn from it, i will.. but right now.. i am no role model.
Love to you all. Will update as i go as always.
*blows a kiss* xxx
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