Here's to getting the old me back!

[Spanglymum]

Sorry for self-pity post yesterday. I was feeling rubbish (could you tell?!). Much restored after a decent night's sleep. Hurrah!

Went to the different group last night and really enjoyed it. I'm now wondering whether I would be able to switch counsellors for maintenance as the LLC running yesterday's group, who also took one of our groups when our counsellor was on holiday, is much more thorough on the CBT etc than my usual one. I wouldn't want to offend my LLC but on the other hand this programme is expensive, RTM seems to be key to success, and I want to give myself the best chance of maintaining longer term!

 

[Spanglymum]

The pains have come back again. Burning pain all afternoon, so I called the doctor again. Spoke to a different one and he wants to see me this evening to check it out. Am bit worried, but very glad I was able to make an appointment to see someone about it as it hasn't been nice the past few days,

 

[Tarragon]

Hope all goes well with the doctor, you have done so well so far, don't give up unless you have to.
I hope you are feeling better soon. Take care.

 

[Spanglymum]

Doctor was LOVELY! Really enthusiastic and positive about what I've achieved on lighter life, when I thought he might lecture me. Kept saying how amazing my weightloss is. Thinks the pain is probably gallstones so has given me some super strength painkillers and referred me for an ultrasound and blood tests. He was very reassuring though, said loads of people have gallstones but never find out about it, and that after this attack it may settle down and I may never have another. Phew! Really glad I got seen before the long weekend. I feel a lot less stressed now!!

 

[slendablenda]

What a relief Spangly.
Gall stones are something that affect quite a few people after significant weight loss. The theory seems to be that they were already there before, but now there's nothing for them to hide behind!
I'm glad the Doctor was supportive, so many of them are scathing about LL, especially when they know little about very low calorie diets.
I hope you enjoy a healthy slim 2011.

 

[Spanglymum]

Thanks, sb!

Feeling much more positive again today. Hurrah! Back to work tomorrow but I think it's going to be a good year. My husband and I have our tenth wedding anniversary in April and my mother in law is babysitting for us overnight, which means we're going to have our first night away together without the children since we had our eldest six years ago. Very exciting!

I'm having a chat with my llc on Friday about next steps and when to start RTM etc. I still want to lose the last stone but I'm so excited about how far I've come. I was wearing some of my new sale purchases today and felt more 'me' than I have done in years. My cousin said to me yesterday that it's taken years off me! Lol.

Still having wistful thoughts about food, but know it's just crooked thinking and I want to finish what I've started. Food will still be there when I finish!!

 

[MagdaX]

What a woman!!!
You are amazing!!! I am so proud of you!
A true inspiration!
I know you will be one of those amazing people who lose the weight AND keep it off. Your head is completely in the right place and I salute you for that!
I am so happy and excited for you about all the good things that you're looking forward to this year and I wish you all the best!

 

[Spanglymum]

Thanks, mags!

Just need to sort out my compulsive spending now though . Honestly, somebody stop me! I've been so sensible with money for YEARS and not had an overdraft or used a credit card, but this year it's all gone to pot. Is this because I'm finally in control of my eating? Very weird!

Thing is, I ought to feel terrible, but I don't. I ought to feel guilty. I do a little bit. Well, quite a bit. Just selfish really. I've spent "my" money, not the family money, but I still feel guilty about having a balance on my card. But oh, the lovely clothes!!! Am wearing a gorgeous outfit today (if I say so myself) and it just makes me smile knowing that my wardrobe is finally full of things I have chosen because I LIKE them, not because they are the "least bad" option.

I have a plan for paying the money back - so it's not forever. But I do hope they stop the sales SOON!!

 

[Spanglymum]

Scrub the guilt: I LOVE getting to choose from a range of nice clothes, and catching sight of myself in a mirror and thinking 'not bad for 40'! (Sorry! That sounds hopelessly vain and I didn't mean it to!) I've spent so many years feeling terrible about my body, and pretending I didn't. It's such a relief to have my body match the 'me' inside. Scared I won't be able to maintain though. I really hope RTM helps me plan for the 'real' food world.

 

[MagdaX]

Darling!
Having a bit of balance on your credit card is nothing! Trust me! lol
I'd say enjoy it and go ahead and show your skinny body off!

 

[Spanglymum]

Thanks, hun! Must book in that makeover while I'm feeling spendy! lol

Just feeling so BRILLIANT! It's really funny when people see me at work after the holidays, as I'm tending to wear more fitted styles. Everyone seems to do this (not-so-subtle) look me up-and-down thing. Hilarious! Almost like they're looking for the rest of me.

I've started the "couch to 5k" programme as I want to run a 5k for the MS Society later this year (I've signed up so no backing out!!). My husband has MS and one of the reasons I wanted to lose weight was that I am just aware of how lucky I am NOT to have MS, and how I wasn't making the most of the health and fitness I was born with.

 

[Jezebella]

I love this whole phase of things, and Spangly I had as much fun as you spending, spending, spending, its just so liberating to look the way you feel inside. good luck with the run sounds like you have the perfect motivation to do it!!

Jez
xx

 

[slendablenda]

Good for you Spangly. What a motivation.
I have also swapped my food addiction for buying clothes, shoes, accessories, patterned tights, boots, underwear, handbags............... in fact, my tights collection now takes up more than my underwear used to when I was a size 28!!!
Ho hum. Still loving it though - but I can spot a bargain at 20 paces. xx
:superwoman:

 

[Spanglymum]

I need to step up my eBay activity (selling) to offset some of my recent purchases I think . At least I've got a whole wardrobe of size 18/20+ clothes to get rid of so I might make a bit of a dent! I think a few months' "spending diet" will help, anyway - come on sales, finish already!!

Hope I will have lost a few pounds at tonight's WI as the last couple of weeks have been a bit lacklustre, especially considering the stress I went through in abstaining over the holiday period. It should be an exciting WI anyway though, as I'm going to be planning my RTM options with my LLC. Can't believe I'm almost there!

 

[MagdaX]

Hey, how about swapping your shopping 'addiction' for a new one?!
I know you want to train for a 5k run so what about how about swapping shops for gym?
That's my plan anyway

 

[Spanglymum]

Ooh great idea, and in fact what I've been trying! Have been to the gym twice this week, have yoga tomorrow morning as usual and have also teamed up with a jogging buddy at work for when I'm a bit fitter, possibly March. Gotta love LL!

So many compliments today. Really lovely. Off to my group now and to plan next steps...

 

[Spanglymum]

I've done it! Am officially a "normal" BMI as of this evening's weigh-in, and have been booted out of Total on to Lite lol. My last week of Abstinence then a few weeks on Lite to shed the last few pounds before RTM. Can't quite believe it. I'm shell-shocked and overwhelmed. What a crazy, fabulous, journey!

We got our "before" and "after" photos and it was a bit of a bittersweet moment, as I suddenly came face to face with my old self and realised quite how big I'd got. Felt quite sad and sorry for her. But that's the PAST!! Hurrah for Lighter Life!

Now the tough part begins... well, next week once I start (gasp) eating again!! ooh!!

 

[MagdaX]

You'll be absolutely fine Hun. Honestly. You have proved time and time again that you have a will power not to be messed with!
Any chance of posting your before and after pics on here?!!
I'm curious! (I will definitely post mine when I'm done, promise!)
Again, well done you!

 

[Spanglymum]

Yes, I will post them. I don't have a scanner at home though so will have to scan them in at work next week. I'll PM you to sort out that makeover soon!! It will be great to finally meet you in person!

 

[MagdaX]

Definitely! Can't wait!