is it better to be over or under?
- Thread starter huwiesmummy
- Start date
huwiesmummy
Gold Member
Try upping it then. I'd say give yourself an extra 2 or 3 hundred extra to play with for a week then drop down again and it may kick start you again.
toofatkat
Not such a fat kat now :)
You don't need to obsess about numbers. I think if you look at the guidelines try something and work out what works best for you. You need to be happy with what you chose to do. Also if you're happy at the weight you are then that's also ok. My supposed ideal is 10:7 and I seriously doubt ill get there. Not because I don't think it's possible but because I'm 44, I don't want to be 18 again and I want whatever weight and size I end up being to be maintainable. I see that as probably being around 12 stone. I'm happy with my food choices. Cook from scratch, always have done because of children's allergies, no processed junk. If I go over calories then so be it. If I'm happy with my choices then I don't mind. If I eat too much crap then I'm not happy. You need to make knowledgable choices about the food you .are choosing to eat whether you follow calories or not. Being happy is the most important thing. We've got to live the rest of our lives like this 
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huwiesmummy
Gold Member
Agreed and that's what I'm trying do. I just felt a need to control my food. And ill continue cal counting but ignore weather is a a specific number if I over ate its a good day to hit the gym. I cook from scratch when I've got a kitchen to cook in. And what I make is healthy though I do love a bit too much cheese but that's ok. I can alway burn it off if I want it. It's all about balance. I agree on the weight thing. I'd love to hit 10st but if I hit 11 ill be chuffed.
I love this site its helped me so much through this tough time in my life. I would have been so sick if I hadn't of found a way to get through. If I ever get to goal I'd still hang out and help others the way so many have helped me as this forum is a gem of lovely women and men.
Tam Xx
I love this site its helped me so much through this tough time in my life. I would have been so sick if I hadn't of found a way to get through. If I ever get to goal I'd still hang out and help others the way so many have helped me as this forum is a gem of lovely women and men.
Tam Xx
linski24
Gold Member
toofatkat said:You don't need to obsess about numbers. I think if you look at the guidelines try something and work out what works best for you. You need to be happy with what you chose to do. Also if you're happy at the weight you are then that's also ok. My supposed ideal is 10:7 and I seriously doubt ill get there. Not because I don't think it's possible but because I'm 44, I don't want to be 18 again and I want whatever weight and size I end up being to be maintainable. I see that as probably being around 12 stone. I'm happy with my food choices. Cook from scratch, always have done because of children's allergies, no processed junk. If I go over calories then so be it. If I'm happy with my choices then I don't mind. If I eat too much crap then I'm not happy. You need to make knowledgable choices about the food you .are choosing to eat whether you follow calories or not. Being happy is the most important thing. We've got to live the rest of our lives like this
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Hi x
I cook all my own stuff x always have done ..
I'm 5ft and my ideal weight is under 9 stone .. I think it's 7stone to 8st 10lbs .. Something like that ... Well I know at 43 I shall NEVER get there again ... But I would be happy to be in mid 9's I'm in early 10's ....
I'm not a happy chicken but for other reasons .. And low self esteem etc ... Think the weight issues are a symptom of everything else .. :-(
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toofatkat
Not such a fat kat now :)
I think it gets to a point where we need to accept that our weight naturally is better slightly higher as we get older. I'm not my 18 year old daughter, and I don't want to be she's too skinny . I just want to be happy with myself and stuff everyone who says otherwise
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. I just want to be happy with myself and stuff everyone who says otherwise Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
linski24
Gold Member
toofatkat said:I think it gets to a point where we need to accept that our weight naturally is better slightly higher as we get older. I'm not my 18 year old daughter, and I don't want to be she's too skinny
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I put my hot pink lipstick ion today and I felt better ... Even the gas man leered at me lol ... Amazing what a bit of pink lippy can do to lift you lol :-D
I'm trying to be a bit more relaxed today ... And choosing my means and snacks wisely and maybe not thinking of the calories eaten too much x
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huwiesmummy
Gold Member
toofatkat said:I think it gets to a point where we need to accept that our weight naturally is better slightly higher as we get older. I'm not my 18 year old daughter, and I don't want to be she's too skinny
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I have to say though I'm only turning 25 ill never be 9 st. I'll be lucky to hit the top of 10st. I a bit to go but already feel like am boney. I am definitely not big boned as my mother alway said.
I just want to be healthy now. I want to beable to keep up with my child when he wants to play football and such. If I lose 3ish st in the process Yippy if not its ok I can live with that right?
Tam Xx
huwiesmummy
Gold Member
linski24 said:You can be ok with that if you let yourself be ..!!
It's all down to positive outlook and feeling the love and all of that stuff lol
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I feel the love man! Hehe.
Well thets my plan as of tomorrow. Got my kitchen back tomorrow. Back to good eating and exercise and just keeping an eye out got over eating.
Tam Xx
JaxieD
Silver Member
What an informative thread which I can totally relate to. My life has been a constant diet and it would seem the more I have dieted the fatter I have become. I have lost and gained stones and stones over the years in my desperation to lose the excess weight only to eventually end up back at square 1. When I turned 40 (4 years ago) I embarked on the Cambridge diet which I stuck to for 10 weeks and successfully lost over 3.5 stone. it changed my life and I felt fab. I got to about a half stone from the 'ideal' BMI at that time but went up the plans and introduced food again due to a holiday. I never really managed to get back into it but more or less maintained my weight for a few months by low carb, doing CD again for a few days at a time here and there but the weight started to go back on. I stayed at around 12.7 stones for a couple of years which I was relatively content with (strangely a size 14 for me.....5'4) as I looked slim enough. Then suddenly about 2 years ago I went on a girlie trip to New York.....ate and drank freely and came home a few pounds heavier. As usual I started my crash dieting to lose the excess but found it impossible to shift. Within a week I had gained 10lbs!!! I couldn't believe it!!! And nothing would move it. I turned again to Cambridge a couple of months later and lost 11lbs but this started a trail of constant yoyoing. Last Xmas I decided to do alternative day dieting to try and limit weight gain over the christmas period and ended up putting on a half stone. In the new year I commenced Simming World and took up spinning 3-4 times a week, after 6 weeks I failed to lose a single pound. WW followed, paleo, primal, 17 Day Diet, Dukan.....etcetera (desperation or what?) but all my trusted diets no longer worked. Went to the doc who tested my thyroid but all was normal. She looked at me as if I was some neurotic pre-menopausal female who was obviously in self denial. I was so depressed and was driving everyone nuts with my obsessive behaviour about my weight. So.......I have decided enough is enough.........
I am now over 14 stone......my confidence has taken a real battering and I now truly believe that my diets have made me fat. My poor body doesn't know what has hit it. The constant calorie restriction, starvation has undoubtedly damaged my metabolism over the years no matter what anyone says. I know dieting like the back of my hand and I know that my body no longer works the way it used to.
Over the past week I have started to eat at my BMR (2000 cals more or less) to try and reset my metabolism. I have stopped exercising for a while and am trying not to stress myself out. No doubt I have put a few lbs on but I don't know as I'm not going near the scales (they have the power to ruin my day). I will see how things go for a few weeks and then start exercising gradually again and see how my body reacts and then reduce the calories down a bit (but not too much) concentrating on good food. I already feel less stressed. I'm not putting myself through this again. I don't know if this is the answer but starving myself certainly isn't.
BTW I also have a fat obsessed mother......love her to bits but as horrible as it sounds part of me holds her to blame for my weight issues.
I am now over 14 stone......my confidence has taken a real battering and I now truly believe that my diets have made me fat. My poor body doesn't know what has hit it. The constant calorie restriction, starvation has undoubtedly damaged my metabolism over the years no matter what anyone says. I know dieting like the back of my hand and I know that my body no longer works the way it used to.
Over the past week I have started to eat at my BMR (2000 cals more or less) to try and reset my metabolism. I have stopped exercising for a while and am trying not to stress myself out. No doubt I have put a few lbs on but I don't know as I'm not going near the scales (they have the power to ruin my day). I will see how things go for a few weeks and then start exercising gradually again and see how my body reacts and then reduce the calories down a bit (but not too much) concentrating on good food. I already feel less stressed. I'm not putting myself through this again. I don't know if this is the answer but starving myself certainly isn't.
BTW I also have a fat obsessed mother......love her to bits but as horrible as it sounds part of me holds her to blame for my weight issues.
linski24
Gold Member
JaxieD said:
Wow ......
That's some life :-( however it sounds like mine ... I only have about another half stone to lose but I feel so awful and pics have turned up on Facebook from a night out and I look so fat and ugly :-( fat face ..:-( so ME ... Isn't about ME .. It's all about how I look ..... Sigh .....
However ...... I'm trying the relax the calories a bit ..!!! Iv not been going over my BMR of 1850 ... But going over the 1350 that I need to lose weight (that's the 500 cals loss per day)
We'll see what happens x
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Phoenyx
Step away from the cake..
I want to applaud you ladies, for stopping letting an arbitrary number of calories, usually too low, rule your life.
And I wanted to say how inspiring I found your stories. We've all got a way to go but I feel we're on the right track.
i truly believe If your extra calories are clean (low sugar, low in junk) you'll find you'll lose weight any way. We all get hung up on calories (me included!) and of course they do matter, but there is quite a large margin of error - there's no way we accurately know down to even the last 100 cals what we're eating or burning off. Unless you've been measured in a lab, we don't even know what our bmr is. I spent years on diets at around 1500. I always ended up bingeing. I'm now eating around 2000 cals a day (I've set my upper limit at 2200), and I've lost 3lbs since the start of November. For me it's to do with eating clean (veg with every meal, meat, fish, eggs, nuts etc no wheat but I do eat dairy though never low fat) most of the time. And I like to exercise, so do an hour most days.
Anyway, it really is an experiment of one, finding what works for you. It took me 25 years of diets to work that out, and I'm sure ill have ups and downs, but I know at least I'm on the right path now...
Good luck on your journeys!
And I wanted to say how inspiring I found your stories. We've all got a way to go but I feel we're on the right track.
i truly believe If your extra calories are clean (low sugar, low in junk) you'll find you'll lose weight any way. We all get hung up on calories (me included!) and of course they do matter, but there is quite a large margin of error - there's no way we accurately know down to even the last 100 cals what we're eating or burning off. Unless you've been measured in a lab, we don't even know what our bmr is. I spent years on diets at around 1500. I always ended up bingeing. I'm now eating around 2000 cals a day (I've set my upper limit at 2200), and I've lost 3lbs since the start of November. For me it's to do with eating clean (veg with every meal, meat, fish, eggs, nuts etc no wheat but I do eat dairy though never low fat) most of the time. And I like to exercise, so do an hour most days.
Anyway, it really is an experiment of one, finding what works for you. It took me 25 years of diets to work that out, and I'm sure ill have ups and downs, but I know at least I'm on the right path now...
Good luck on your journeys!
linski24
Gold Member
Phoenyx said:
Really ..?? You eat 2000..?? Abd lost weight ... That's amazing ..!!
Well done ..!!!
I'm trying not to stress and trying not to stand on those faffing scales ..!!!!
Then I see pics that people put on fb and I sigh loudly .. My hub said today looking at me in the flesh dies not look like what the pics portray .... And that the camera lies .... I don't know coz I can't give myself an objective viewpoint lol
I'm trying to relax coz everyone says I'm not not eating enough .. But it's blooming hard to eat more .!!!! X
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huwiesmummy
Gold Member
I'm upping my cals again. I tried 1200cals but I'm worried it too little. I'm trying to eat more healthy fats like salmon and avacado. Not sure I think I may relax even more with counting I think stress is more of a problem for losing weight
Tam Xx
Tam Xx
huwiesmummy
Gold Member
I am trying to keep my head in the game with this. basically I will go over 1200 and not go over 2000 so that gives me the freedom to eat more healthy fatty foods. Because since my gallbladder I have struggled to eat fats. I think I have a fear of them now. Especially cheese I'm scared to have full fat cheese.
Tam Xx
Tam Xx
linski24
Gold Member
huwiesmummy said:
Aaaawwww cheeeeeeese ... Treat yourself ..!!!
I went out last night ... That's rare .... And I kept tally of what I ate/drank ... Erm 2900 calories later .... Gulp...... Abd going to Franky and benny's fur dinner for daughters bday now ... But they have a fairly new lighter menu .. Know what I'm having already to keep cals down ..!!
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JaxieD
Silver Member
huwiesmummy said:
I think you've raised a valid point.....STRESS! Stress raises cortisol in the body (think that's right?) and cortisol can cause fat to gather sound your middle and weight gain. . I always Poo-pooed that idea but when u read about it.....stress is not only the stuff caused by work and the daily grind of life.....it can include physical stress like working out to hard (not an issue for me, lol :-D), long hours in the office with tigt deadlines but also crash dieting. Starving yourself is very stressful emotionally and physically....is it any wonder I'm messed up!
I'm restarting my exercise regime this week.....nothing over taxing.....some spinning and walking and will try some resistance and will take deep breaths and not get worked up if my size 16s get tighter.....it isn't a quick fix.
I can also so related to the photo thing. I was shown a photo of myself recently from when I had finished CD.....I was so slim and I could've cried. I hate being in photos now.....but I have to hang in here and not go screaming back to VLCDs......that is so not the answer......
Hoping to find the answer with eating more as eating less is certainly not doing it!
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