It's Now Or Never

Pinkie1973 said:
Well the diet has been bollocks, I am very drunk, and declared ny love for a guy with cystic fybrosis who is on borrowed time, who doesn't reciprocate. This is why I'm better off single. Can't be trusted

I'm back to goodness in the morning though.
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Pinkie1973 said:
Hi. Thanks girls

Yeah, my behaviour was akin to an 18 yr olds, but sod it, I'm young free and single and am entitled to blast the cobwebs away every so often.

Anyway. Another quickie. Food ok, but one syn over. Given I'm getting myself back into it, plus other mitigating factors I'm fine with that. For today, it can't continue

Put on a further 2.5lbs, and I'm fine with that too. Means I am now 13st 11lb, so I'm still the right side of 14 stone. 5.5lbs after a two and a half week holiday is not bad at all.

So focus now is on getting to 12 stone by 28th November. That's 25lbs in about 14 weeks. So long as I keep up my running the rest will fall into place.

Oh and a nice starting place for getting my head back into it is getting the Woman of the year award in class today. I couldn't have done it without you lot. So thank you my beautiful chicas.

About to cuddle down to some Grand Designs with the bairn now. I will catch up with you all this week. Sorry I've been so rubbish and self centered. :-( x

Oh and ps, I've decided I'm gonna do a 100 mile cycle ride from London to Bristol. Over a few days, but nevertheless a few hours cycling there. Just gotta sort the logistics/practice etc
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Ooops, but you do make me laugh !!! Wow, woman of the year. That's brilliant :). And your gain is totally reasonable - you have been looking forward to those occasions for so long and you enjoyed them. Now back on it and back down. What a superstar :)

Oh, and more wows - a 100 mile cycle ride. Eeeek, just the thought of it is making me sweaty !!!

Pinkie1973 said:
Hello girls. Quickie as I should be working and am already late starting as I nipped out for a run.

I am fine just busy/preoccupied.

Had Footie last night, and as Mave will vouch, I may have had a tipple or two. Thing is, my boy is going away with his Dad on Fri for EIGHT NIGHTS! Never been apart from him for so long before. Think I'm getting worked up and am manically booking things to keep me busy. So not sure how good I'll be with booze over that time. I'm in psychological destruction mode I think. But its sort of ok. I'm happy, even if I am just pretending to cover up if you catch ny drift. It's just a temp blip. But food has been fine. And I have been running - did nearly 5 miles this morning. Get me! :)
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OMG. 5 miles. That's fantastic. Hope you can enjoy the child free time as much as possible and then it will be even more lovely when he comes home.

Big hugs.

Gail x
 
Thanks Gail and Molly.

Well I've come to the conclusion I'm not coping with the imminent absence of my son at all well. Feel very out of control right now. But the running is keeping me sane. I do have a few things on:
Tonight - pub with my old school friend who's over from France
Sat day: run, going to London to buy new bras and treat myself to some decent moisturising creams, weight loss is taking its toll, I'm too old
Sat night - out fur 40th birthday party
Sun - nothing planned. May go for a,long bike ride and visits my Nan
Mon - run and get to stay to weigh in class whole way through
Tues - office and meeting up with a mate, heavy drinking night
Weds - science museum Lates with a friend
Thurs - a mate from Footie popping down for the eve
Fri - quiet night get myself sorted for Sat and Beanie's return

Most of those could be fine with the diet, its a question of me taking back the control. :-(

So emotionally I'm a bit all over the place, but at least I recognise exactly what is going on. Need to think of looking after myself rather than the more self destructive behaviour.

Anyway, me and the lad are off to watch Harry Potter this morning, followed by a day watching the cricket on the tv. I.e. a day at home, that's what he wants.
 
Hi,
Sounds like you're going to be rather busy over the next week but can imagine you'll miss your little prince lots. I think you recognising that you're struggling emotionally is the first step. I'm sorry to hear you are though. Do you think writing your feelings down, either here or elsewhere, would help? Well done for keeping the running up. Excellent stuff.
Enjoy the cricket today. My bf went to the test yesterday and as you can imagine spent most the day in the bar sheltering!
x
 
Pinkie......<<<<<<<Big Hugs>>>>>>

I'm always a total emotional wreck when either of my two go away, and have constant 'Mummy Tummy', when it feels full of butterflies and upside down, which I'm sure you know what I mean:)

Have a great day together today, and put a big brave smile on your face to wave him off tomorrow.....then come back for another <<<<<<Big Hug>>>>>>>
 
Hey Pinkie - Glad you enjoyed your little boozy sesh the other night, your fb updates were hilarious!!!

Sounds like you have got a busy week planned for when your boy is away. As a self-proclaimed expert in the field of missing someone (;)), I'll say the first couple of days will probably be the hardest. If you have nothing planned for Sunday, try to get something planned. Even if it is lazing on the couch, watching movies, eating (SW friendly) junk and trolling the internet for hours, try to keep yourself occupied. After the weekend you have such a lot planned, I don't think you will have too much time to fret about Steven, you will think of so many things you want to get done before he comes back, and right now it will feel like you have ages and ages to get things done, but he will be back before you know it and you will wonder where all that time went!

Enjoy having some you time :) xxxx
 
Hi girlies and thank you so much for your lovely posts. I've not really had my head into slimming world for the past few weeks, so I'm conscious that I need to start drawing the line. I guess I don't write on here so much too as I feel bad, because I've not caught up with the rest if you, although I have been wondering how you've all been getting on.

So from now, I'm gonna start keeping my own diary up to date, else I risk going completely off piste. I will catch up with everyone else when I can, and suffer the guilt in the meantime.

So far, my time apart from Steven has gone so quickly, I've barely had a chance to meet him. I have thought for a while before he went, that we actually really need the break from each other. I'm trying to make the most of the 'freedom' as I described in my previous post.

Running going well. As a few of you may remember I had been having some ups and downs with the ciggies. Well I've finally won that battle, its been 2 weeks since my last one. I do believe this has been the turning point for my running too. I have much more energy.

I've been considering other little demons of mine over the weekend too, and given myself a little pat on the back. I know and feel I've come so far.

So today's food...

Banana milkshake (4 syns for banana plus HEa - 350ml soya milk)

Morning run (5 miles)

Breakfast:
Mixed fruit, branflakes (HEb), low fat natural yoghurt.

Lunch:
Fruit salad, yoghurt.

Tea:
Salmon fillets, potatoes plus salad.

I'm going to prepare a beef stew later too, to freeze. Just really fancy meat.

Weigh in later (eek), take it on the chin. Gonna stay to the whole class, then get ironing done, prepare tomorrow's lunch and have a quiet hour reading.
 
Pinkie1973 said:
Hi girlies and thank you so much for your lovely posts. I've not really had my head into slimming world for the past few weeks, so I'm conscious that I need to start drawing the line. I guess I don't write on here so much too as I feel bad, because I've not caught up with the rest if you, although I have been wondering how you've all been getting on.

So from now, I'm gonna start keeping my own diary up to date, else I risk going completely off piste. I will catch up with everyone else when I can, and suffer the guilt in the meantime.

So far, my time apart from Steven has gone so quickly, I've barely had a chance to meet him. I have thought for a while before he went, that we actually really need the break from each other. I'm trying to make the most of the 'freedom' as I described in my previous post.

Running going well. As a few of you may remember I had been having some ups and downs with the ciggies. Well I've finally won that battle, its been 2 weeks since my last one. I do believe this has been the turning point for my running too. I have much more energy.

I've been considering other little demons of mine over the weekend too, and given myself a little pat on the back. I know and feel I've come so far.

So today's food...

Banana milkshake (4 syns for banana plus HEa - 350ml soya milk)

Morning run (5 miles)

Breakfast:
Mixed fruit, branflakes (HEb), low fat natural yoghurt.

Lunch:
Fruit salad, yoghurt.

Tea:
Salmon fillets, potatoes plus salad.

I'm going to prepare a beef stew later too, to freeze. Just really fancy meat.

Weigh in later (eek), take it on the chin. Gonna stay to the whole class, then get ironing done, prepare tomorrow's lunch and have a quiet hour reading.
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What did I say??!! I knew the time would fly in, a week really isn't a lot of time and with work and all your socialising, Friday will be here before you know it!!

So impressed with all your running, I am taking your inspiration and will follow it, promise. And because you have been running so much, I'm sure your WI result might not be as bad as you think anyway.

Well done on giving up the cigs too, have never been a smoker, but I'm sure it makes a difference to your health.

Good luck for WI xx
 
Hi Pinkie - don't worry about posting on our diaries. Just keep us up to date here.

Well done with the ciggies - I'm giving up when at target, & sticking to SW to make sure I don't put any weight back on!

Make the most of your time on your own. The bairn will be back soon enough causing chaos. And I agree, it's good for both of you to have time away from each. Makes the heart grow fonder!!! to quote and old phrase.
 
Pinkie1973 said:
Hi girlies and thank you so much for your lovely posts. I've not really had my head into slimming world for the past few weeks, so I'm conscious that I need to start drawing the line. I guess I don't write on here so much too as I feel bad, because I've not caught up with the rest if you, although I have been wondering how you've all been getting on.

So from now, I'm gonna start keeping my own diary up to date, else I risk going completely off piste. I will catch up with everyone else when I can, and suffer the guilt in the meantime.

So far, my time apart from Steven has gone so quickly, I've barely had a chance to meet him. I have thought for a while before he went, that we actually really need the break from each other. I'm trying to make the most of the 'freedom' as I described in my previous post.

Running going well. As a few of you may remember I had been having some ups and downs with the ciggies. Well I've finally won that battle, its been 2 weeks since my last one. I do believe this has been the turning point for my running too. I have much more energy.

I've been considering other little demons of mine over the weekend too, and given myself a little pat on the back. I know and feel I've come so far.

So today's food...

Banana milkshake (4 syns for banana plus HEa - 350ml soya milk)

Morning run (5 miles)

Breakfast:
Mixed fruit, branflakes (HEb), low fat natural yoghurt.

Lunch:
Fruit salad, yoghurt.

Tea:
Salmon fillets, potatoes plus salad.

I'm going to prepare a beef stew later too, to freeze. Just really fancy meat.

Weigh in later (eek), take it on the chin. Gonna stay to the whole class, then get ironing done, prepare tomorrow's lunch and have a quiet hour reading.
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Really Pinkie, don't worry about our diaries. You are not the only one who struggles with keeping up at times. What is most important is you. You say you've not really had your head into SW recently but actually your actions speak a little differently. You have continued to run, you are continuing to follow the plan (at least some of the time) and you are still thinking about it. We have all had times when it just doesn't feel like something that you want to be bothered with and yet it really is to one degree or another. I have certainly had times like that but what keeps me going (either to a lesser extent like when I came back from hols a couple of months ago or to a greater extent like now) is that I just can't go back where I came from. You have come so far, even if you just maintain for now (which I suspect you won't) you have done brilliantly. And you are not alone.

So, concentrate on you and the bairn. Please keep posting here and let us know how you get on.

Gail x
 
Maverick said:
What did I say??!! I knew the time would fly in, a week really isn't a lot of time and with work and all your socialising, Friday will be here before you know it!!

So impressed with all your running, I am taking your inspiration and will follow it, promise. And because you have been running so much, I'm sure your WI result might not be as bad as you think anyway.

Well done on giving up the cigs too, have never been a smoker, but I'm sure it makes a difference to your health.

Good luck for WI xx
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Thanks Mave, yes its flying by really, though I don't feel like I've stopped much. Friday eve partially booked now as in gonna take my Nan to to the food shops (big news, my Nan went back to her own home today!) :)

Pommette said:
Hi Pinkie - don't worry about posting on our diaries. Just keep us up to date here.

Well done with the ciggies - I'm giving up when at target, & sticking to SW to make sure I don't put any weight back on!

Make the most of your time on your own. The bairn will be back soon enough causing chaos. And I agree, it's good for both of you to have time away from each. Makes the heart grow fonder!!! to quote and old phrase.
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Thank you. As it was a temporary blip (just a few months this time) it was relatively easy. Your head just has to be in the right place hey? Good luck for when you give up though.

Yeah, he was starting to really get to me, most of that as I'm on my own with him I think. I bet he's having a whale of a time. Of course now I feel guilty that I'm not missing him as much as I thought I would. I will be gagging to see him by Saturday though.

Woodland girl said:
Hi pinkie!!
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Hey WG! How are you? Thank you dropping by x

missfortissimo said:
Good to hear from you Pinkie. Don't fret about everyone's diaries. Heaven knows I'll be much worse at getting to the diaries once school starts back up next week! :eek:
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Hey Molly, thanks and I hope its all improving your end. Yeah I'm gonna be starting a course in October, so yet more pressure! Lol

gl12282 said:
Really Pinkie, don't worry about our diaries. You are not the only one who struggles with keeping up at times. What is most important is you. You say you've not really had your head into SW recently but actually your actions speak a little differently. You have continued to run, you are continuing to follow the plan (at least some of the time) and you are still thinking about it. We have all had times when it just doesn't feel like something that you want to be bothered with and yet it really is to one degree or another. I have certainly had times like that but what keeps me going (either to a lesser extent like when I came back from hols a couple of months ago or to a greater extent like now) is that I just can't go back where I came from. You have come so far, even if you just maintain for now (which I suspect you won't) you have done brilliantly. And you are not alone.

So, concentrate on you and the bairn. Please keep posting here and let us know how you get on.

Gail x
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Thanks Gail, you are right. Going back just isn't an option. I feel so much happier now, I can do so much more. Besides, I most definitely am hitting 5 stone loss this year.

So I lost 1lb, I was relieved as I have been going a bit crazy this past week. If I'm good I'll hopefully get the other 4.5lbs I put on off over the next fortnight. I can then aim for my 4 stone shiny. So some little goals there. :).

Also I didn't have the salmon, I went and got a large chicken/lamb shish kebab with loads of salad. So 9 syns for the pitta. This is excellent as I was so so close to getting something far less healthy. I'm pleased that I stopped myself. It was a now or never moment. :). I didn't have a yoghurt earlier either. Other than that I'm on plan.

I've had a few pints of NAS squash today. 13 syns in total

Long day tomorrow. Need to prepare some veggies to take to work. Gonna walk to the train station (as I'll be on the razz tomorrow night - but my last razz moment for a while, I shall then get back to a much lower alcofrol regime). No other exercise planned though.

I may try to run Weds and Thurs at work though if my diary permits.

Thanks all again for your support. You're all lovely :) xx
 
Pinkie1973 said:
Friday eve partially booked now as in gonna take my Nan to the food shops (big news, my Nan went back to her own home today!) :)
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Yay - that is such great news considering how poorly she was. Give here hug from me!
And one for you too - keep with it and you'll be at your 5 st shiney in no time at all!
 
Pommette said:
Yay - that is such great news considering how poorly she was. Give here hug from me!
And one for you too - keep with it and you'll be at your 5 st shiney in no time at all!
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Thank you Pomette, I know! I was chatting about it all with her on Sunday, and she was saying how she nearly gave up. But saw a pic of some of the great-grandchildren, and decided that she wasn't going anywhere yet. I knew it wasn't her time, I'm just glad she could find the strength to fight back. :) Anyway, hopefully I'll be able to take her out for lunch or something soon, I owe her a birthday present!

Today's planned food...

Breakfast:
Mixed fruit, branflakes (HEb), shape zero yoghurt.

Snack:
Fruit. Skinny capuccino (half HEa)

Lunch:
Box of veggie sticks plus a mugshot.
Fruit and yoghurt.

Snack:
Fruit (of course!) and another skinny capuccino (rest of HEa).

Dinner:
I have absolutely no idea. The only certainty is that I'll be in the pub by half five and will be drinking cider. I am going to try and drink water between each pint though. If the pub serves pub (dubious that time of day) I'll see if I can get a jacket potato. Other than that I just don't know.
I'll go over my syns with the alcofrol though. :-/
 
That's good to hear about your nan!

You don't drink alcohol every day so just do your best during the day until then, and then start anew tomorrow. You've been doing all this running, good for you!
 
Hi Pinkie

Great news about your Nan, that's brill and well done on the running, I would love to be able to run but thinking about running leaves me breathless :eek:

Don't worry about not reading peoples diaries, you have been real busy and on your hols, I have hardly read any since I started my new job then when I log on in an evening I only seem to manage to catch up on a few and then need to log off, I haven't even done my own diary for a few days until tonight.

Hope you're enjoying a bit of 'me' time, you deserve it.

Much love xxx
 
missfortissimo said:
That's good to hear about your nan!

You don't drink alcohol every day so just do your best during the day until then, and then start anew tomorrow. You've been doing all this running, good for you!
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Thanks Molly. It went well all in all. I managed to get a jacket spud, no butter with baked beans and a huge salad in the pub. I probably had about 4 pints of cider altogether, but they were my only syns all day. Going running today too. :)

Saddle Bags said:
Hi Pinkie

Great news about your Nan, that's brill and well done on the running, I would love to be able to run but thinking about running leaves me breathless :eek:

Don't worry about not reading peoples diaries, you have been real busy and on your hols, I have hardly read any since I started my new job then when I log on in an evening I only seem to manage to catch up on a few and then need to log off, I haven't even done my own diary for a few days until tonight.

Hope you're enjoying a bit of 'me' time, you deserve it.

Much love xxx
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Thanks SB. How is your new job going? I must confess, I'm quite enjoying the freedom. My wee baby called me yesterday afternoon too, sounds as if he's having a great time.

So as already mentioned, yesterday's food went well, plus 4 ciders, which I believe equates to 24 syns lol

However, there may have been quite a lot of body magic too, so I'm sure that helps counteract it all, plus more Thurs night, gotta make the most of the freedom. (The guy I went out with, is an old flame from before I met my husband. I get on well with him but don't want anything from him, well other than a mate and the body magic). Making the most of it, as this will my lot for the rest of the year I imagine lol Suffice to say I'm shattered now.

Todays food plan.

Breakfast:
Mixed fruit, branflakes (HEb), shape zero yoghurt.

Snack:
Fruit, capuccino (half HEa)

Lunch:
Jacket spud and salad and baked beans

Snack:
Fruit, capuccino (remaining HEa)

Tea:
Mugshot, fruit, shape zero yoghurt.

I'm going to the science museum Lates tonight, adults only. It's really good fun. Apparently they have speed dating now too. Suspect I'll swerve that though. Too many other things to play with. :).

Have a good day all xx
 
Pinkie1973 said:
Thanks Molly. It went well all in all. I managed to get a jacket spud, no butter with baked beans and a huge salad in the pub. I probably had about 4 pints of cider altogether, but they were my only syns all day. Going running today too. :)

Thanks SB. How is your new job going? I must confess, I'm quite enjoying the freedom. My wee baby called me yesterday afternoon too, sounds as if he's having a great time.

So as already mentioned, yesterday's food went well, plus 4 ciders, which I believe equates to 24 syns lol

However, there may have been quite a lot of body magic too, so I'm sure that helps counteract it all, plus more Thurs night, gotta make the most of the freedom. (The guy I went out with, is an old flame from before I met my husband. I get on well with him but don't want anything from him, well other than a mate and the body magic). Making the most of it, as this will my lot for the rest of the year I imagine lol Suffice to say I'm shattered now.

I'm going to the science museum Lates tonight, adults only. It's really good fun. Apparently they have speed dating now too. Suspect I'll swerve that though. Too many other things to play with. :).

Have a good day all xx
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Oh Pinkie you do make me laugh! I am loving my job so much, it makes such a change to go to work and be really busy that the day just flies by and actually enjoy what I'm doing again, just means I don't get much chance to get on here and have a good nosey at all the diaries. Just popped on now while I'm in the office on my own this morning!

xxx
 
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