Jim's lazy Atkins diary

[Jim]

Morning all, we have olivia today as tomorrow is packing day, we're off to Corralejo in Fuerteventura on Wednesday for a week, you may remember we went there last year, it was so nice we decided to go again this year.

 

[Alpzy]

Hi Jim

 

[Gemstone]

Oooo..... lovely Jim - enjoy your holiday x

 

[Spinoza]

So sorry for your loss but I think the holiday timing is good for you both Jim - hope you can enjoy the sunshine and try to take happy memories with you.

 

[Kat1e]

Hi Jim, hope you are having a fab time xxxx

 

[Jim]

Morning all, what a fabulous week. Back to reality now

 

[Gemstone]

Glad you had fun - welcome back to reality x

 

[Jim]

Hi gem, morning all.

Well it was a very lazy holiday, we didn't even hire a car this time. Just spent most of the day on the beach or wandering around the old town. I'm not sure if we even took any photo's this time.

 

[Kat1e]

Hi Jim :wavey:

Great to hear you had such a lovely lazy break - well done
Xxx

 

[Gemstone]

Lazy is sometimes the way to go x

 

[Spinoza]

Glad you got a proper rest Jim - how's C holding up now?

 

[ladyfelsham]

Welcome back Jim, glad you enjoyed your R and R xx

 

[Jim]

Morning all,

Amazing how life can change, no Jack duties any more, but sadly, for the moment no Olivia duties either. Carol is off now and "Bump" is imminent.

Colleen is fine, I think after all those years of looking after first her Mum Lily and then Jack she is actually stress free now which is marvellous really. I don't think unless you've been through it that you can understand just how hard looking after elderly relatives can be, especially if they are awkward like jack was. I find I'm spending more and more time with my Mum as well now, she's 87 and hale and hearty but getting very forgetful. I go round in the morning to make sure she takes her meds, even though she insists she's taken them, they are in dated blister packs so I can see she hasn't. I'll cook her a meal as well, easily done really, but it's all time consuming and not quite how I envisioned spending my retirement.

Talking of which, this weekend is the annual Falklands reunion. and I'm 65 on Saturday so officially an OAP then. LOL.

 

[Kat1e]

Hi Jim, Sounds like you still have plenty of commitments and agree it's the time and care/worry that takes energy. My p's also elderly 80s but at least they are just around the corner DH p's are 10 years younger but live 3.5 hrs away so MILs recent illness has put a big strain on family

Anyway, hope you have a mega fab reunion and also birthday booze up have one for me (or 2 or 3) Xx

 

[ladyfelsham]

Looking after parents is such hard work Jim, but I'm glad your mum is still healthy, that makes such a difference.

Have a fabulous reunion and a wonderful birthday!!!! xxxx

 

[Gemstone]

It is difficult with elderly rellies - I know, I've been there and the stress takes a while to leave you - I was trying to sort everything out and hold down a stressful job at the same time. The pill thing is a nightmare - even when Mum was getting 2 visits a day from carers we had to hide the blister pack up high so that she didn't tamper. She would swear she'd eaten but the sandwhich the carer would still be there with a cold cup of tea and nothing had moved from the freezer. I would say to her, "What have you eaten?" "Oh, bits of left overs I cooked up" she would say. I would say to her "You don't cook anything to have left overs from" and she would say "Oh I do....... don't I?" Mum lived 12 miles away and I worked 17 miles away from home in the opposite direction so could not go all the time but it was a worry. With the best will in the world you can only do what you can do x

 

[Jim]

Morning all,

You know Gem, your description there is absolutely spot on. I must go and see what sort of care package I can get for Mum, that'll relieve some of the stress I'm sure. And yes. I have to hide the tablets as well.

 

[Gemstone]

Do get a care package in place Jim - at least you know there is always someone going in and checking. MIL gets 2 visits a day - the morning one to make sure she showers and dresses safely (mobility issues and difficulty getting in and out of the bath) and the evening one to make sure she has something to eat and that she is generally ok. She has frozen meals delivered which she can microwave at lunch time. She has a Piper Lifeline for if she has a fall and they ring us if there is a problem or call an ambulance if they are unable to raise anyone on their list. The carers use a key box to get in and out as does her once a week cleaner - all extra faces and a bit of life going in and out. The cleaner (a friend of my daughter who has done elderly care work in the past) spends 2 hours there once a week and brightens up her day while she works. It is also a pair of eyes and ears in case any problems arise. OH pops in most evenings after work but the small detour puts him right in the middle of horrendous traffic - not really what you need after a days work.

I always refused to be referred to as my mothers carer - making it clear that I was her DAUGHTER not her carer. I had no objection to doing things for her but could not physically (due to distance and work and back injury) or emotionally take on the responsibility for her day to day care. She needed consistant and specific care on a daily basis - anything less would have compromised her safety. "Care fatigue" set in with the constant emotional "assault" as each new crisis needed sorting and Mum became more and more confused and (bless her) more difficult. Don't ever underestimate how much it can take out of you. I think your mum is very lucky to have you Jim x

 

[slaj]

Morning Jim, I echo all that has been said about a care package, give the local social services a call, would your mom be in agreement ?
Have a wonderful birthday , enjoy the weekend

 

[Gemstone]

:birthday: Hope it was a good one x