kaz`s diary

[kazbro]

hi ya mate
i`m about just so bloody buisy with the kids off
i am failing miserably at this healthy eating lark
last week i sat in mcdonalds and had a big meal and choc shake
tried to justify myself by saying it was so i could get a free glass lol
god what am i like
stupid cos i have sat so many times in there whilst on cambridge with not one urge to nibble on a fry.
and last night i ate a bag of minstrels
while i`m on ss i never crave choc so what the hells up with me i dont know
gained another 2lbs to so thats 18lbs gain now what the ****
god roll on 2nd oct when i can start back on ss
when food is completely out of the equation i seem to manage
hope you are well mate i keep meaning to email you but kids hog pc all the time
i will stay in touch more regular when they go back
hope you are managing on cd and not following my example lol
well everyone tell me off now pleeaaaseeeeeeee
tell me to get my wobbly butt focused and not eat crap
xxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[MsJMC]

Heyyyyyyyy
Things will get better Kaz , yes I remember you saying you sat there in Macs while the kids had food just with a drink , its all about how your thinking at the time , with the kids off as well its hard as you are in more too , mine go back on Tuesday son , girl goes back Wednesday , hey me nd CD I got back on track yesterday , after I was really good till Saturday came my sister Barbie and I went OTT with food , well did it again on sunday and Monday , but returned to CD tuesday , thank god , i go away to Palma on 26th Oct so I guess i'd love to lose another 2 stone , I did straight CD yesterday no meat , so another 1LB and i'm back to where I was before my blow out . Hey won't be long 2nd Oct and you will be geared up , yes kids hog the pc , my son is on hios in his room and his Xbox360 , he never leaves his room only when food is cooking , so mate what have you been up too ? yes keep in contact with me girl !!! we can do this !!!

 

[kazbro]

hi all,
well i have a confesion i am back on ss before my 12 week post op date
i was really desperate and not managing at all maintaining so i bit the bullet and started at 9 weeks post op
i had some shakes over from before plus my niece bought a weeks worth and only managed 1 so i have enough now to cover me until i see my cdc in 2 weeks

i`m on day 5 and managing well
got all the headaches,shivers,tummy grumbles, runs, spots i got the lot feel like i got flu but bring it on as i will soon feel the energy of ketosis and start to see the weight come off

been a tough few months since coming off ss but am now in the state of mind that will see me through and help me complete my journey

have had some very testing days
tuesday day 1 my son had me going to the chip shop for him i stood there thinking shall i shant i but i resistedtemptation, even when my daughter didn`t eat hers i threw it in the bin
dont get me wrong it was bloody hard i was almost in tears :cry: but it had to be done and i am glad i did
and so thats how the 5 days have gone on
today we went to the pub and as they sat with there crisps,nuts and drinks i sat with a pint of iced water and a look of satisfaction that i hadn`t nibbled

got a whopper of a headache today so must drink more i am rather bad at the water intake and i struggle even nmore now the weather is getting colder, feel i need something hot
i will try the porridge once i see my cdc as that sounds a nice warm substitute for a shake
well i best get on have a great weekend everyone almost a week i`ve done and well chuffed

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[MsJMC]

Welcome back girl
Great to have you on board ! See Kaz here we both are again since the same time of starting this CD lark lol
Ho chips , yes a carb that really is hard , i still find seeing bread hard , but come on girl we can do this !!!! The porridge is very sweet , so you like very sweet ? if not just go for one . The starwberry silk is out now too ready made ones . hope you feel less headachey soon , I felt awful yesterday , took me a while to fight off the thought of having food and also got a headache from hell , woke up with it to . day 5 already , you did so well last time , , come on keep at it !

 

[kazbro]

hey jackie we are here again but this time we will get to goal and stay there yyeeeeehhhaaaawwwwwwww

well day 6 for me and doing well
had a battle with a slice of cheese last night but i won
today i have a mountain of ironing to do so that will keep me buisy
i find my hardest time of the day around 4pm just before tea time
i still cook for them all and dish it up but i sip on water the whole time
i am also finding music a good deterent when i think i am going to cheat i stick my ipod on to some up beat music and soon gets me in a happy mood that`s when i feel i can conquer this flab
i have got such a long slog ahead of me but with all you people on here i know i can do it
i have accomplished so much so far i need to see this through and i will
listen to me all positive lol
i`ll probabaly log on tonight crying saying hiw i am struggling lol
i`m afraid thats part of any diet we all face bad times and temptations but mini mins sure helps to get through it
well off to make my 1st shake of the day yummy strawberry
have a great day all
stay strong
xxxxxxx

 

[Porgeous]

Hey there you! Good luck with SS although it sounds like you are feeling positive and getting back in the zone. Stay strong hun and you will reach that finishing line xxx

 

[kazbro]

thanks porgeous
you are looking a gorgoeous as ever girl
just hope i can look as good at goal
funny but i still cant visualise how i will look i have been gross for so long i dont see myself as ever looking beautiful at the mo
supoose you have got to love yourself to be in that state of mind and at the mo i still hate what i see when i look in the mirror
i`ll get there
xxx

 

[Porgeous]

thanks porgeous
you are looking a gorgoeous as ever girl
just hope i can look as good at goal
funny but i still cant visualise how i will look i have been gross for so long i dont see myself as ever looking beautiful at the mo
supoose you have got to love yourself to be in that state of mind and at the mo i still hate what i see when i look in the mirror
i`ll get there
xxx

Thank you! I so know what you mean about hating what you see in the mirror, I spent many years feeling that way. Your feelings will change hun, it kinda sneaks up on you and one day you will find yourself smiling at your reflection and it will feel wonderful, keep going... xxxx

 

[MsJMC]

You are too hard on yourself Kaz , you are a lovely person remember that ! Thats what this site is for logging on when ever you feel you want too . How did your day go ?
Its seeing pics there of Porgeous really helps , thinking hey its our aim to get there !
You think from 3ish I feel I am wanting it to be dinner time but I hold out till 5 and thats it , I have CD bar or shake , or ready made , then i'm ok .
Cheese mmmmmm , I have had alot of dealings with cheese , its bread with me , but I can't go there yet , must keep going with my weight loss . I find doing the family there dinner helps it passes time till its my dinner time , strange lol . Come on Kaz keep the days coming !

 

[kazbro]

hi jackie my day was pretty good
i stood and finished all my ironing it took me 3 hrs but feel great now
then cooked them all a big chicken dinner
my daughter was playing up she wouldn`t eat so i sat with ehr and fed her my mouth was watering with every mouthful but i restrained myself like a true trooper and battled on
then had a lovley soak in the bath
just had my last shake of the day and now having a coffee
all in all its been a good day diet wise
keep up the good work everyone
xxxx

 

[MadamDotty]

Hi Kaz

You're doing brilliantly, you've got through the hardest part & sounds like you're back in the zone & focussed. You'll see those pounds falling off again before too long.

Keep up the good work

Take care
xx

 

[MsJMC]

Blimey Kaz 3 hours of irioning , I did about 30 mins thought that will do lol
Always nice to have a soak , more so on this , gather your thoughts up .
sent you an Email Just now !

 

[kazbro]

hey MD thanks for the posting nice to see you
hi jackie will go check mail in a minute
well day 7 and done marvelous today
had the old mcdonalds test and i won yyeeeeeeehaaawwww
gemma had a happy meal and as always only ate her chicken nuggets leaving all her fries
well i stared at them and in my head said to myself if you eat these you will be fat for ever and so threw them all away
i had a large black coffee
then on the bus home a bottle of water

i am so feeling strong at the moment, i am waiting for the day the little voice talks to me telling me i want to eat but for now no little voice has beat me yet

tonight they all had burgers in a bun with fried onion and salad
looked deeeeliiicoouuuussss
again i won and sipped on my water

think i deserve a gold medal today proud proud proud
long may my big headedness reign lol lol lol

well all you ss peeps well doen for another day being good and keep up the good work
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[MsJMC]

Good to see the old Kaz coming back and fighting all the way , how does that feel , great to be in control i bet .
my tummy has been hungry all day , I did give in to a few things but nowhere near what I would have done , I guess we will have to see what weigh in day says thats thursday . So in all I have had a trying day ! Come on strong head get back ! Hey macs and you did very well with coffee ... when we put food in the bin it feels a waste I know ... but its the only thing todo , out of sight out of mind . So day 8 coming right up girl ! keep going

 

[SparklingFairy]

I had to use the 'if you eat this you'll be fat forever' today and it worked! Great going.. I cant believe the pics in your sig, you've done amazing!

 

[kazbro]

I had to use the 'if you eat this you'll be fat forever' today and it worked! Great going.. I cant believe the pics in your sig, you've done amazing!

thank you
still got loads to go but getting there
well day 9 for me
weighed myself yesterday lost 9lbs so well chuffed with that
still not caught up with my ticker yet i`ll just leave it where it is and once i am below it i will then adjust it.
had a lot of voices in the last 24hrs all telling me to eat and its been so hard but i managed to stay on track
feeling a bit rough today getting lots of giddy spells and feeling flu like
my own fault i just dont drink enough, i did 2 pints of water yesterdsay and 1 coffee not good :whoopass:
so today i will do 4 pints and more if i can
off to town this afternoon meeting son he is well chuffed he has got on the course he wanted
were going to mcdonalds , sounds like i`m always there lol, i will have a coffee while i watch him nibble :drool:
bought myself some new knickers on monday i have always bought sloggi maxis very comfortable over the belly under the chin ones lol
well m&s were doing a deal 3 for £10 very pretty ones ranging from g strings to tangas
i gave the g string a miss as they would be hidden undrer my belly and bum it would look like i wasn`t wearing any but i picked up some tanga ones black ones with lace and silk so sexy
tried a pair on yesterday and they fit lovely, before when i tried the tanga ones on they are supposed to sit just under the belly button but as my belly was so big they used to roll under the belly and sit on the bikini line
well these stayed put and even though no one else could see them i felt great just knowing i had pretty knickers on lol

aww and this morning got a good morning from some very fit workman down the road and a wink arty0049:

well not sure if i`ll get back on here today so wish you all well and stay positive

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[MadamDotty]

Have a good Kaz, and enjoy your knickers!!

 

[MsJMC]

I know about voices , trying hard today myself , which course did son take ?
Macs soon they will say Kaz , your usal hehe
and you will reply , yes Black coffee
Knickers ... yes I need some new ones too , worth paying that bit more for them , happy knicker day girl hehe .
Got to go to my daughters school today , its meet the teacher day .
Well keep thinking slim guys i'm sure we will get there !

 

[kazbro]

just a quick visit
we all had the lurgy here and been pretty poorly
on the mend now
saw my cdc today boy how i have missed her she is so motivational.
i wsa a bit embaressed as i was over a stone lighter to when she last saw me
but now i`m officially back on ss as i will get weighed properly now every tuesday
i tried the porridge today to wasn`t to bad but i will make it with more water next time
so no more crappy ups and downs this is it now skinny ville here i come yyyeeeehhhaaaawwwwww

xxxxxxxxx

 

[MsJMC]

Hey Kaz , glad your better and your family , thats great to hear your back , me too going to give it my all today , I have been pi$s balling about for 2 weeks , just think of 2 weeks worth of losses , boy i'm wasting time , need to crack on now , come on girl lets crack it !