Liripip's Long Journey

[liripip]

Hi everyone, thought it was about time I started a diary. I've been reading others and I can imagine they're quite a big help/release/motivator.

Well I'm Kate, a 30 year old student teacher with 2 gorgeous boys aged 10 and 7. I've been single for a few years now, mainly cos I can't be done with the hassle of a partner lol although it would be nice to go out on a few dates from time to time. My weight is definitely stopping me from doing that; I hardly ever go out and when I do I don't feel confidant or attractive. I also really want to be slimmer for when I start on teaching placement in September, I can't bear the thought of standing in front of a room full of teenagers and being judged on how I look. However my first goal is to have slimmed down for my cousins wedding in August as I want to wow family I've not seen for a while - always a nice feeling to be told you look good

I started CD two weeks ago (currently on day 16) although this will be the first 100% week I'll have done. The first week I picked at chicken and eggs and last Saturday I had quite a blip - naughty food and drink. I'm over that now tho and moving on.

I weighed 16st 2lbs when I started and have lost 7lbs since. Not quite what I wanted but my own fault really. This is the heaviest I've ever been and think I've been in denial for quite a while. I did lighterlife a few years back and lost 3st but I didn't follow through to the end, my eating habits didn't change and of course the weight crept back up plus about 2st more. I'm not going to make that mistake again, I'm seeing this to the end, working my way up to maintenance.

I suppose my eating habits have been all over the place for years. I hardly ever eat breakfast, grab something quick and unhealthy for lunch then not eat dinner til quite late. I'll normally have a few glasses of wine while I'm cooking it too. I've also secretly eaten, buying pasties or pre-packed sandwiches and eating them in the car etc. I have no portion control either, I can quite happily fill a Pyrex dish with pasta bolognese & cheese and devour the lot. I even justify it to my family by saying I'd not eaten all day, knowing full well I'd had a pile of crap for lunch. I can honestly say I don't feel the sensation of being full; it's strange but I sort of feel my stomach getting bigger but it never feels full. I'm sometimes amazed by how much I can eat!

I've never classed myself as greedy but looking back at what I've just written there's really no denying it! I just enjoy food and drink. I don't think I eat when I'm stressed or unhappy - I'd rather have a drink - but drinking makes me hungry and not bothered if i eat well. I tend to eat when I'm bored and I'm really bad for finishing off the kids dinners! I eat unhealthy food cos it tastes nice! I like "healthy" food too, more than junk food sometimes, but I quickly lose heart when I try lose weight by eating that way. A pound a week isn't enough for me, I'm just not a patient person I suppose! My thinking is that when I reach goal I'll feel so good about myself I'll make the time and effort to look after myself and not go back to where I was. I'll not want to go through this again!

Crikey, I've really rambled on haven't I?! It feels strange to say all those things, things I've never said to anyone. It feels good though too, I've never looked at myself like that before. I've even written things I'd not even realised til now. I think this diary malarkey could be a really good thing

I really should be going to sleep now, right after I've been to the loo for the millionth time! Good night and happy slimming xx

 

[Rkmriddell]

Popping by to subscribe x

 

[liripip]

Not been able to update my diary for a couple of days as my minimins app has been playing up. Didn't know what to do, had a bit of a blonde moment lol. Willpowerwoman suggested deleting the app and reinstalling it. It worked yay! Can't believe I didn't think of that!

I've had my third wi today and another 4lbs have gone forever, I would've been happy with 3 so 4 is fab for me. My mums had her first weigh in too, 6lbs off after 5 days. I'm so pleased for her

I've been really busy this past week. I've got so many projects on at uni - I've had to put in so many hours. Handed one in yesterday so that's one down four to go! I've not been sleeping that well either; not getting to sleep til after 2am most nights. I feel like I've had loads of coffee, really wired. Not sure if it's a side effect of CD but could do without it really, I'm knackered! I have felt good during the day tho - positive and full of energy so that's good really.

I've had a nice day out with my eldest son, we don't get to have much one-to-one time so it was a nice change for us. He's growing up so fast!

I'm having a nice evening to myself tonight, no kids so I'm stopping down at my mums (she's at her friends tonight) so I can have some me time. My dad lives with me and I love him to bits but sometimes it nice to be on my own and watch crap telly lol.

 

[Rkmriddell]

Not been able to update my diary for a couple of days as my minimins app has been playing up. Didn't know what to do, had a bit of a blonde moment lol. Willpowerwoman suggested deleting the app and reinstalling it. It worked yay! Can't believe I didn't think of that!

I've had my third wi today and another 4lbs have gone forever, I would've been happy with 3 so 4 is fab for me. My mums had her first weigh in too, 6lbs off after 5 days. I'm so pleased for her

I've been really busy this past week. I've got so many projects on at uni - I've had to put in so many hours. Handed one in yesterday so that's one down four to go! I've not been sleeping that well either; not getting to sleep til after 2am most nights. I feel like I've had loads of coffee, really wired. Not sure if it's a side effect of CD but could do without it really, I'm knackered! I have felt good during the day tho - positive and full of energy so that's good really.

I've had a nice day out with my eldest son, we don't get to have much one-to-one time so it was a nice change for us. He's growing up so fast!

I'm having a nice evening to myself tonight, no kids so I'm stopping down at my mums (she's at her friends tonight) so I can have some me time. My dad lives with me and I love him to bits but sometimes it nice to be on my own and watch crap telly lol.

Oooh lovely time to yourself how fab x enjoy it. And well done again on a great WI x

 

[liripip]

Oooh lovely time to yourself how fab x enjoy it. And well done again on a great WI x

Thanks hun xxxx

 

[Zest for Life]

I'm having a nice evening to myself tonight, no kids so I'm stopping down at my mums (she's at her friends tonight) so I can have some me time. My dad lives with me and I love him to bits but sometimes it nice to be on my own and watch crap telly lol.

Can't beat crap tv. I love being on my own, if I get a fri or sat in on my own I love it. Enjoy yourself x

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

 

[liripip]

Can't beat crap tv. I love being on my own, if I get a fri or sat in on my own I love it. Enjoy yourself x

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

Had a really relaxing night. Watched bgt for first time this series and it made me cry. I'm such a pap!!! x

 

[liripip]

Day 24 - not managing to update my diary as much as I'd hoped to. I've been so busy, was up at half 5 yesterday to get into uni for 8. Needed to be up early so I could do my hair and look presentable as we were putting on an activity day for 20 year 8 pupils. We were supposed to do it last week but the school pulled out at the last minute. We've not been told why but we've heard there was a fire at the school. Anyway, I was dead nervous as it was my first time teaching although it wasn't a fair representation of teaching - there were 11 other adults in the room, 7 of my peers, 2 of my tutors and 2 teachers from the visiting school. That definitely didn't help my nerves! I managed to screw up the end of the lesson, forgot everything I'd been taught. I could've kicked myself. We only had one session for our lesson whereas everyone else had two goes, so they could learn from their mistakes. To be honest though I'm not that bothered now, we're not getting marked on how we taught, we're getting marked on the essay we've got to write that critically reflects on how we did and boy do I have a lot to reflect on!! It was a fun but exhausting day, but the main thing is that the kids enjoyed it. We asked them all to write a positive and negative about the day, the only negatives they wrote were either "nothing" or "not enough time" so we're all pleased really.

I only managed a litre of water and one cd product in 12 hours yesterday. Felt lousy in the afternoon! Tried to catch up on the water when I got home but don't think I managed it all. Really didn't fancy my shakes when I got in so had some chicken. I know I should've had them but felt really sick and thought once wouldn't hurt. Couldn't sleep again last night even though I'd been up since half 5. I fell asleep in the sofa this morning though after the school run - so I'm behind on the water again!! I've got so much uni work to do too but really can't get into it. I need to come up with a design for my major project and can't think of anything and we've only got 3 weeks left looks like I'll be pulling in a few all nighters!!!

Got weighed on Saturday and lost another 4lbs so that's 11 in 3 weeks. Not as good as some other ladies but I'm dead chuffed with it. I'd be happy losing 3lbs a week. My mum lost 6lbs in 5 days do I was so pleased for her, she's been so miserable about her size recently so it's nice to see her doing something positive about it and feeling good again. I'm not sure how I feel about wi this week, I've had chicken some days and struggled with my water. I'd love to lose 3 to take me to my stone but can't see it really. Although I'll take anything as long as it's a loss tbh. My family say they can see a difference and I think I can but not sure if it's wishful thinking. I was really looking forward to trying on some trousers that I've not worn for a while (how sad does that sound!!) and was expecting them to be quite loose but they weren't. Was a bit disappointed, I could feel a bit of a difference but not as much as I was expecting.

I've not felt great this week. Had dizzy and lightheaded moments so I've been eating chicken which has helped a bit. I spent a lot of time on Sunday doing my mums garden and I've been walking more than usual so think that's got something to do with it. Rushing about at uni won't be helping either I suppose.

Right, waffled on enough again! I better get some work done! xx

 

[Rkmriddell]

Grrrr just did a big long post and it crashed!!

Well done on WI. It's a great result and I've no doubt you'll have a great result this time too. Do keep up with your water and products though hun. Have you tried the bars? Sometimes they're easier to get down when you're having those days.

Am glad the day with the school kids went well and you gained lots of experience to help you with your final essay. What does your final project need to be about? X

 

[Rkmriddell]

Oh remembered the other bit. Don't be disheartened about the smaller trousers. You'll soon be in them xxz

 

[liripip]

Grrrr just did a big long post and it crashed!!

Well done on WI. It's a great result and I've no doubt you'll have a great result this time too. Do keep up with your water and products though hun. Have you tried the bars? Sometimes they're easier to get down when you're having those days.

Am glad the day with the school kids went well and you gained lots of experience to help you with your final essay. What does your final project need to be about? X

I have bars and love them, esp the mint crunch ones. I'm normally not too bad with getting my products down me, I was running around like a headless chicken yesterday that's all. I'm on it like a car bonnet today

We've got free reign really when it comes to our project. It can be anything, a new invention, improvement on an existing product etc. Mine's a fancy egg timer that weighs the egg and tells you the cooking time. I've got all the electronics done, just need to design and make the actual product now. I sort of know what I want it to look like but I can't draw to save my life and can't think how to make it! Going to see my tutor tomorrow all being well so he should steer me in the right direction xx

 

[liripip]

Oh remembered the other bit. Don't be disheartened about the smaller trousers. You'll soon be in them xxz

Thanks. Can't wait to get in my old clothes. Been through my "slim" wardrobe and I've got 7 pairs of jeans and 10 pairs of trousers!! I loved shopping when I was slim - hate it now. I've only got one pair of jeans that fit at the mo. My others wore away between the thighs and I'm refusing to buy any more "fat" jeans xx

 

[Rkmriddell]

I have bars and love them, esp the mint crunch ones. I'm normally not too bad with getting my products down me, I was running around like a headless chicken yesterday that's all. I'm on it like a car bonnet today

We've got free reign really when it comes to our project. It can be anything, a new invention, improvement on an existing product etc. Mine's a fancy egg timer that weighs the egg and tells you the cooking time. I've got all the electronics done, just need to design and make the actual product now. I sort of know what I want it to look like but I can't draw to save my life and can't think how to make it! Going to see my tutor tomorrow all being well so he should steer me in the right direction xx

Sounds good clever you x

 

[liripip]

Hmmm well that explains a lot. TOTM is upon me again. I've got that implant in my arm so never know when it's gunna happen! Explains the emotions and cravings tho. All I wanted yesterday was a tesco chicken and bacon sandwich! Must have stood in front of the shelf looking at them for ages yesterday, in the end I opted for some chicken so wasn't that bad. I've made a bit of a boo-boo tonight tho, one of the boys left a glass of dilute orange after dinner today and I downed the lot without thinking! I was so thirsty. Hope the citric acid hasn't taken me out of ketosis. Even tho I've eaten this week I think I'm still in it as my mouth tastes (and smells!) like something died in it. Although that sounds gross it's a good thing really

 

[Rkmriddell]

Hmmm well that explains a lot. TOTM is upon me again. I've got that implant in my arm so never know when it's gunna happen! Explains the emotions and cravings tho. All I wanted yesterday was a tesco chicken and bacon sandwich! Must have stood in front of the shelf looking at them for ages yesterday, in the end I opted for some chicken so wasn't that bad. I've made a bit of a boo-boo tonight tho, one of the boys left a glass of dilute orange after dinner today and I downed the lot without thinking! I was so thirsty. Hope the citric acid hasn't taken me out of ketosis. Even tho I've eaten this week I think I'm still in it as my mouth tastes (and smells!) like something died in it. Although that sounds gross it's a good thing really

Totm does that to me too. Makes me so hungry. I always call it my carby week as that's exactly what i crave! Am sure you'll be fine with the juice, it wasn't a lot eh xxx

 

[liripip]

Totm does that to me too. Makes me so hungry. I always call it my carby week as that's exactly what i crave! Am sure you'll be fine with the juice, it wasn't a lot eh xxx

I feel crap, just want a sandwich lol. According to my scales I've only lost a pound not looking forward to wi tomorrow xxx

 

[Zest for Life]

I feel crap, just want a sandwich lol. According to my scales I've only lost a pound not looking forward to wi tomorrow xxx

Dont weigh yourself, I've stopped cos I kept expecting to see loses everyday.
I actualy only lost 1lb my Last wi. but you just have to carry on, a lb off is better than a lb on xxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

 

[liripip]

Dont weigh yourself, I've stopped cos I kept expecting to see loses everyday.
I actualy only lost 1lb my Last wi. but you just have to carry on, a lb off is better than a lb on xxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

That's true. Don't normally weigh myself but couldn't resist. Felt fat and bloated and wanted to see if it had affected anything. I'm not gunna do it again, think I'd rather not know xxx

 

[Rkmriddell]

Dont weigh yourself, I've stopped cos I kept expecting to see loses everyday.
I actualy only lost 1lb my Last wi. but you just have to carry on, a lb off is better than a lb on xxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

Exactly what she said ^^^

 

[Rkmriddell]

That's true. Don't normally weigh myself but couldn't resist. Felt fat and bloated and wanted to see if it had affected anything. I'm not gunna do it again, think I'd rather not know xxx

Once a week at CDC for me nothing else. I become obsessive otherwise and it's no good for us. The diet is hard enough without having to stress over whether our weight is gong up or down every day. X