meowws diary..
- Thread starter meoww
- Start date
porshe04
Silver Member
It's really interesting listening to you, it could so easily be me writing all that. Well done on leaving the pasta, being someone who can't leave anything on a plate I'm almost in awe of friends who can order a delicious dessert and then only have a couple of mouthfuls. I certainly wouldn't feel like I was being rude if I left food, I'd feel really proud of myself. Not so so sure how I'd feel if I cooked and some was left though! In my house everything on your plate has to be eaten. I do worry that my 3 young children will grow up and like me won't be able to leave food.
meoww
Silver Member
Thanks porshe, I enjoy rambling on and I like to share the ideas I read in my beck book. I will keep practising leaving bits of food, its seems strange to me too, Im not a fan of wasting food, but then eating too much and getting fat is a waste of food too!
I can dream to one day enjoy the flavours of foods without eating the whole lot! I try to think, each mouthful tastes virtually the same, so whats the difference in having a huge bowlful or a small one?
I can dream to one day enjoy the flavours of foods without eating the whole lot! I try to think, each mouthful tastes virtually the same, so whats the difference in having a huge bowlful or a small one?
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meoww
Silver Member
Well tonight!
I went to a family gathering where we were ordering chinese for everyone!
And I love chinese, no matter how much I try to convince myself its horribly bad for me, I still cant turn it down. Every couple of weeks im craving it.
So I formed a plan, I cooked a curry using boiled swede as a sauce base, loads of spices and soy to make almost a Japanese Katsu curry sauce, with green beans and chicken.
Took it with me, and my amazing OH decided to join me with this!
so he ordered some boiled rice and had it with the curry and I just had the curry with no rice -which im getting used to!
I ordered some seaweed -hope its ok carb wise; being green! Just to feel like id joined in, and I put the curry in an old takeaway tub so it kinda felt like I had takeaway too!
There were spare chips, there were prawn crackers, offers to taste other peoples food, and desert!
I did not have ANYTHING off my plan!
And it was surprisingly easy...
I wonder if this whole 'strengthening the resistance muscle' might actually work on me!
Part of me is starting to worry about post-diet life but I suppose I have to worry when I get there.. mind you still got some chapters in my book to read.
I went to a family gathering where we were ordering chinese for everyone!
And I love chinese, no matter how much I try to convince myself its horribly bad for me, I still cant turn it down. Every couple of weeks im craving it.
So I formed a plan, I cooked a curry using boiled swede as a sauce base, loads of spices and soy to make almost a Japanese Katsu curry sauce, with green beans and chicken.
Took it with me, and my amazing OH decided to join me with this!
so he ordered some boiled rice and had it with the curry and I just had the curry with no rice -which im getting used to!
I ordered some seaweed -hope its ok carb wise; being green! Just to feel like id joined in, and I put the curry in an old takeaway tub so it kinda felt like I had takeaway too!
There were spare chips, there were prawn crackers, offers to taste other peoples food, and desert!
I did not have ANYTHING off my plan!
And it was surprisingly easy...
I wonder if this whole 'strengthening the resistance muscle' might actually work on me!
Part of me is starting to worry about post-diet life but I suppose I have to worry when I get there.. mind you still got some chapters in my book to read.
dovydaitis
Silver Member
just read though and the entry about chinese, well done you!!! I know what you mean by craving it but I also saw your curry recipe and will copy it 
You are doing great, just one day at a time
You are doing great, just one day at a time
Want2BeSlim
Gold Member
meoww
Silver Member
Quick update, had a couple of slip ups since Sunday, well I planned to eat things that aren't really allowed.
But then yesterday I decided to drink alcohol and then ended up eating things I shouldnt!
Felt really ill today, perhaps a mix of hangover and carb hangover and I might just be getting ill too, not felt right this week.
But anyway, woke up prepared to move on and carry on, wrote a plan in the morning for my days eating and tasks too. (Im off work today and yesterday)
I decided to eat 4 sachets today and nothing else.
And then I got my beck diet solution book out and did some more reading, re-made my support flash cards adding some new ones and reviewing my notes.
Confessed all to my 'diet coach' which is my OH and he's doing great! said the right things so im happy. And he's lost 5lbs himself so he's happy! (and ofc im happy for him!)
And I've been 100% today, didnt even have any veg just to avoid any extra bites.
Had a moment where my mum was serving up dinner for everyone and my gosh it smelled good! but I went through my thoughts and responses and the desire to eat it went away and the feelings of self pity went. -sometimes I get all sad and pity myself, oh woe is me! im so hungry! why must I suffer like this!? 'uh, firstly, my choice to diet like this as Im too impatient for any other diet! and its hardly suffering being slightly hungry, I have plenty of fatty stores to use up!'
Bed soon, should get a bit more water down first
But then yesterday I decided to drink alcohol and then ended up eating things I shouldnt!
Felt really ill today, perhaps a mix of hangover and carb hangover and I might just be getting ill too, not felt right this week.
But anyway, woke up prepared to move on and carry on, wrote a plan in the morning for my days eating and tasks too. (Im off work today and yesterday)
I decided to eat 4 sachets today and nothing else.
And then I got my beck diet solution book out and did some more reading, re-made my support flash cards adding some new ones and reviewing my notes.
Confessed all to my 'diet coach' which is my OH and he's doing great! said the right things so im happy. And he's lost 5lbs himself so he's happy! (and ofc im happy for him!)
And I've been 100% today, didnt even have any veg just to avoid any extra bites.
Had a moment where my mum was serving up dinner for everyone and my gosh it smelled good! but I went through my thoughts and responses and the desire to eat it went away and the feelings of self pity went. -sometimes I get all sad and pity myself, oh woe is me! im so hungry! why must I suffer like this!? 'uh, firstly, my choice to diet like this as Im too impatient for any other diet! and its hardly suffering being slightly hungry, I have plenty of fatty stores to use up!'
Bed soon, should get a bit more water down first
dovydaitis
Silver Member
we all have blip, just a case of picking yourself up, dusting down and not beating yourself up (unless its all the while) and picking up the plan. We are only human after all
meoww
Silver Member
Had a good few days! One day being bored off work and two days being super busy running around at work, [lose lose?] and all 3 days being super 100% [win!]
Got some fun times coming up this weekend; so I'm going to be planning some carb eating.. as I've got a cocktail party to attend and regardless of alcohol drinking I would LOVE some fruit juice so I'm just going to create myself a plan!
I love to be spontaneous but I have to learn to plan my food as its the only way to avoid 'accidentally' eating things I shouldn't!
I've also got a couple of meals out to attend so I'm going to have to work around it, I'm not entirely sure where I'm going for those and what food will be on offer so I'm just going to have to carb dodge as much as possible, or just keep it generally light as I'll have already come out of ketosis at that point.
BUT next Tuesday I'm right back to it, and I've got a weigh in on Thursday so just two days to shed off anything that's crept on or not yet shifted! ARG I just really need to see the 11 stones again!!
I might also take advantage of having some sugar in my blood and go for a nice big bike ride!
Got some fun times coming up this weekend; so I'm going to be planning some carb eating.. as I've got a cocktail party to attend and regardless of alcohol drinking I would LOVE some fruit juice so I'm just going to create myself a plan!
I love to be spontaneous but I have to learn to plan my food as its the only way to avoid 'accidentally' eating things I shouldn't!
I've also got a couple of meals out to attend so I'm going to have to work around it, I'm not entirely sure where I'm going for those and what food will be on offer so I'm just going to have to carb dodge as much as possible, or just keep it generally light as I'll have already come out of ketosis at that point.
BUT next Tuesday I'm right back to it, and I've got a weigh in on Thursday so just two days to shed off anything that's crept on or not yet shifted! ARG I just really need to see the 11 stones again!!
I might also take advantage of having some sugar in my blood and go for a nice big bike ride!
dovydaitis
Silver Member
sounds a good plan! I'm doing a similar thing next BH, luckily (?) I'm working this one
meoww
Silver Member
arg!
just realised that the second of my meals out is Tuesday! so arg! erm might have to have super low starve day, something meal then back on weds! garh Im getting worried now that these things will keep cropping up! I think Im just going to need to plan it and be reasonable, if I overdo it on every meal out or occasion, Ill never be or stay thin!
just realised that the second of my meals out is Tuesday! so arg! erm might have to have super low starve day, something meal then back on weds! garh Im getting worried now that these things will keep cropping up! I think Im just going to need to plan it and be reasonable, if I overdo it on every meal out or occasion, Ill never be or stay thin!
meoww
Silver Member
so work was super busy and for some reason I decided to eat some bread in my lunch and I also had a tuna sandwich for tea and a few other bits.. hmmm
although I was so very close to getting some form of pizza so tuna sandwich doesnt quite seem as bad ? mind you, s&s advise to eat carbs the day before drinking so ive done that havent I!
The proof I think will be in the pudding that is me trying to jump back on my horse, and the more weighed down with puddings I am, the harder it will be!
and the more I mix up my analogies... not sure what comes next!
ok plan for tomorrow written for the whole internet to see:-
water
shake?
water
coffee coffee water
tuna salad sandwich
water
*attend party*
erm..cocktails, keep alcohol low, stick to spirits, lots of ice
lentil stew (? I think thats what the host is making)
WATER
and NO CHIPS/drunk takeaway
although I was so very close to getting some form of pizza so tuna sandwich doesnt quite seem as bad ? mind you, s&s advise to eat carbs the day before drinking so ive done that havent I!
The proof I think will be in the pudding that is me trying to jump back on my horse, and the more weighed down with puddings I am, the harder it will be!
and the more I mix up my analogies... not sure what comes next!
ok plan for tomorrow written for the whole internet to see:-
water
shake?
water
coffee coffee water
tuna salad sandwich
water
*attend party*
erm..cocktails, keep alcohol low, stick to spirits, lots of ice
lentil stew (? I think thats what the host is making)
WATER
and NO CHIPS/drunk takeaway
meoww
Silver Member
phew all the festivities are over now!
Ive learned...
so firstly I started my carb eating about a whole day early (mentioned above) wasnt part of the plan!
Then the party day, pretty much stuck to the plan but ofc from eating carbs I apparently felt hungry! so ate a lunch sandwich quite early, didnt have a diet shake for brekkie, then had another piece of bread before the party, then had the food I planned to eat at the party but also way too many crisps, and drunk snacks and drunk takeaway :'( WHY!?!
So next day, didnt feel too rotten, had lunch out (as planned lots of birthdays!) chose a really sensible low carb option but wait, I had TOAST for breakfast so still on the carbs! then fairly active day, but then pizza for tea, was supposed to share with the OH but we didnt. and I ate practically ALL of it.
So today, Ive felt so ill, sick, bloated and yucky!
Ive been ok today, ate the bare minimum during day, 2 sachets, some salad, then out for the final meal of the very long weekend, which was tapas so not a full carb dodge but could have been worse.
no desert, no booze.
still feel ill now though maybe its guilt! or a lesson!
I hope I learn, I cant keep poisoning myself with **** food. If I want big tasty things I need to cook them myself, and if I cant be bothered then I cant have it!
Ive learned...
so firstly I started my carb eating about a whole day early (mentioned above) wasnt part of the plan!
Then the party day, pretty much stuck to the plan but ofc from eating carbs I apparently felt hungry! so ate a lunch sandwich quite early, didnt have a diet shake for brekkie, then had another piece of bread before the party, then had the food I planned to eat at the party but also way too many crisps, and drunk snacks and drunk takeaway :'( WHY!?!
So next day, didnt feel too rotten, had lunch out (as planned lots of birthdays!) chose a really sensible low carb option but wait, I had TOAST for breakfast so still on the carbs! then fairly active day, but then pizza for tea, was supposed to share with the OH but we didnt. and I ate practically ALL of it.
So today, Ive felt so ill, sick, bloated and yucky!
Ive been ok today, ate the bare minimum during day, 2 sachets, some salad, then out for the final meal of the very long weekend, which was tapas so not a full carb dodge but could have been worse.
no desert, no booze.
still feel ill now though
maybe its guilt! or a lesson!I hope I learn, I cant keep poisoning myself with **** food. If I want big tasty things I need to cook them myself, and if I cant be bothered then I cant have it!
meoww
Silver Member
ok so plan for tomorrow, 4 sachets nothing else I think!!
and a PMA
to re-affirm and remind myself:
I do want to do this
I dont want to eat rubbish as it is bad for me in every way
I dont feel good at all after having bad stuff
I do feel great when I stick to my diet!
I do want to look hot on my holiday!
I DO want to change my habits forever!
and a PMA
to re-affirm and remind myself:
I do want to do this
I dont want to eat rubbish as it is bad for me in every way
I dont feel good at all after having bad stuff
I do feel great when I stick to my diet!
I do want to look hot on my holiday!
I DO want to change my habits forever!
meoww
Silver Member
argh
positive attitude remains, although ive been having tiny sabotaging thoughts all day! not serious ones Ive just got this voice in the back of my head that keeps suggesting I eat things I shouldnt, its rather annoying!
Im also panicking as time is running out, its May! a week into May!! my mess ups at the weekend will set back my loss, I will be lucky to have STS this week
Dont know why im sounding so negative, I suppose I can just feel time ticking away and feel like im stuck at this weight, I suppose Im like a big fat train thats stopped and I need a big shove and once Im moving I will carry on
positive attitude remains, although ive been having tiny sabotaging thoughts all day! not serious ones Ive just got this voice in the back of my head that keeps suggesting I eat things I shouldnt, its rather annoying!
Im also panicking as time is running out, its May! a week into May!! my mess ups at the weekend will set back my loss, I will be lucky to have STS this week
Dont know why im sounding so negative, I suppose I can just feel time ticking away and feel like im stuck at this weight, I suppose Im like a big fat train thats stopped and I need a big shove and once Im moving I will carry on
