Pregnancy and Baby Advice Thread: From Conception to Birth, and Beyond!

[Jess<3]

Ladies, Cole's belly button has 'popped' out. It doesn't bother him in the slightest and doesn't look sore but it feels spongy when I touch it. Could it be a hernia? Freaking out that he might need an op!!! Health visitor is coming tomorrow so I'll ask her and he's got his 6-8 week check with doctor on Thursday too so I'll mention it then as well but worried now because my step mum (who's seen a LOT of babies) says she's never seen one like it before

This is it....

View attachment 125313

it looks how my sisters went when she were a baby and it was just a outie belly button. Best just to ask though, i do know hernias go by them self too. My niece had one just above her belly button and her muscles healed itself x

 

[ksmiuk]

It looks more like an outie belly button to me, if it is an umbilical hernia it would be very small and very unlikely to need any surgical intervention. X

 

[sarah_lou1981]

it looks how my sisters went when she were a baby and it was just a outie belly button. Best just to ask though, i do know hernias go by them self too. My niece had one just above her belly button and her muscles healed itself x

Thanks lovely.

I asked on another forum and they said it looks like an umbilical hernia which goes by itself usually. Apparently they only operate if it's still there at about two years old so I feel a bit better Still gonna ask though x

 

[Susiew2001]

Thanks lovely.

I asked on another forum and they said it looks like an umbilical hernia which goes by itself usually. Apparently they only operate if it's still there at about two years old so I feel a bit better Still gonna ask though x

Yeah I agree, I've seen ones bigger than this! They tend to pop out sometimes after they cry. But they will give it chance to go back in. Wouldn't worry too much hun xx

 

[sarah_lou1981]

Yeah I agree, I've seen ones bigger than this! They tend to pop out sometimes after they cry. But they will give it chance to go back in. Wouldn't worry too much hun xx

Thanks Susie. Feel better now. Wasn't really worrying until my step mum said she'd never seen it before then when I heard hernia my first thought was 'operation'. Glad it might not come to that xx

 

[Jess<3]

Ladies who are breast feeding / going to....

Are you exclusively beastfeeding?

I REALLY want to if my little guy has no troubles with it, but I don't want to take feeding from my husband and others too as I feel it's a nice bonding thing... But the whole pump inbetween feeds for others seems hard work lol.
Like when your not feeding you want to sleep, shower, eat, tidy etc. Not sat pumping :/

Any advice to help me please? It's playing on my mind so much xx

 

[pjallen1982]

Ladies who are breast feeding / going to.... Are you exclusively beastfeeding? I REALLY want to if my little guy has no troubles with it, but I don't want to take feeding from my husband and others too as I feel it's a nice bonding thing... But the whole pump inbetween feeds for others seems hard work lol. Like when your not feeding you want to sleep, shower, eat, tidy etc. Not sat pumping :/ Any advice to help me please? It's playing on my mind so much xx

I'm trying to breast feed but have to admit I'm not fully coping with it. We are using some formula feed to supplement. I've had so much mixed advice about bf so I won't confuse you by going into it, but needless to say it is hard work but rewarding when baby puts on weight. I tried expressing but got very little. Health visitor today told me they don't recommend expressing before 6 weeks.

Breast feeding can be very time consuming. My advice would be make sure you eat and drink as much as possible because that does influence your milk supply. You also need to stay calm and relaxed, easier said than done. Perhaps start bf but if you need to introduce some ff or move entirely to ff then any breast milk you have given is fab. I'm off the opinion that you have to do what makes you happy. A happy mummy makes a happy baby. Some people will preach how bf is best for your baby, and there may be some truth in that, but for me I can't be stuck feeding 24/7. I need my sleep and I need to have some identify other than a milking machine. However other ladies manage to bf exclusively and go a fab job,

Sorry if I'm rambling. My advice would be give it a go but don't put pressure on yourself. X

 

[Jess<3]

I'm trying to breast feed but have to admit I'm not fully coping with it. We are using some formula feed to supplement. I've had so much mixed advice about bf so I won't confuse you by going into it, but needless to say it is hard work but rewarding when baby puts on weight. I tried expressing but got very little. Health visitor today told me they don't recommend expressing before 6 weeks.

Breast feeding can be very time consuming. My advice would be make sure you eat and drink as much as possible because that does influence your milk supply. You also need to stay calm and relaxed, easier said than done. Perhaps start bf but if you need to introduce some ff or move entirely to ff then any breast milk you have given is fab. I'm off the opinion that you have to do what makes you happy. A happy mummy makes a happy baby. Some people will preach how bf is best for your baby, and there may be some truth in that, but for me I can't be stuck feeding 24/7. I need my sleep and I need to have some identify other than a milking machine. However other ladies manage to bf exclusively and go a fab job,

Sorry if I'm rambling. My advice would be give it a go but don't put pressure on yourself. X

Yeah that's what I mean as I know it's time consuming just BF alone, never mind expressing too!!

Rob fed Jacob for the first time which was lovely. But like I said it's so hard to decode what to do as they say breast is best so I do want to try x

 

[missy1978]

Ladies who are breast feeding / going to.... Are you exclusively beastfeeding? I REALLY want to if my little guy has no troubles with it, but I don't want to take feeding from my husband and others too as I feel it's a nice bonding thing... But the whole pump inbetween feeds for others seems hard work lol. Like when your not feeding you want to sleep, shower, eat, tidy etc. Not sat pumping :/ Any advice to help me please? It's playing on my mind so much xx

I started off exclusively bf but tbh I couldn't handle it. It's tiring and hard and honestly the most difficult thing I've ever done! And like Penny said you will be pretty much chained to the sofa and I couldn't cope with it mentally. Plus with you having Jacob I could imagine that being tricky. Yes, breast is best but mummy and baby being happy is just as important in my opinion. I beat myself up a lot about feeding and I wouldn't want anyone else to go through that as it was awful :/

At the moment we mixed feed, I bf most of the day and all night and Colin gives one feed in the evening and maybe another in the day if we feel that he needs it. I also express and save up milk for if I need a break or if I'm going out so Colin doesn't always have to give formula. It works at the moment but I think we'll be going full time to bottle feeding soon, at the moment we're just taking it one day at a time.

Just keep your options open is what I would say, mixed feeding is an option that no one really tells you about though! Midwives don't seem to recommend it but it's been great for us. It's all about what works best for you and your family. xxx

 

[CupcakeMummy]

Ladies who are breast feeding / going to.... Are you exclusively beastfeeding? I REALLY want to if my little guy has no troubles with it, but I don't want to take feeding from my husband and others too as I feel it's a nice bonding thing... But the whole pump inbetween feeds for others seems hard work lol. Like when your not feeding you want to sleep, shower, eat, tidy etc. Not sat pumping :/ Any advice to help me please? It's playing on my mind so much xx

Yes I'm exclusively BFing. DD has never had a bottle - she's 9.5 months. I've tried a couple of times with expressed milk but she doesn't know how and to be honest I like it that way. It's what babies are meant to do and you only have to read a tiny bit to learn the benefits of breastfeeding.

Breastfeeding is the hardest thing I've ever done. I cried pretty much every feed for 12 weeks. But the thought of her having formula upset me more than the thought of the physical pain and lack of sleep.

If you truly want to breastfeed don't pump until after 3 months or you can risk your supply and baby getting nipple confusion.

Yes it's tiring, exhausting agony for a few weeks - but no one said doing the best for your baby is easy and I'll be doing it all over again for the next one.

And once you're past the hurdles at the start BFing is waaaaay easier than faffing about with bottles and sterilisers etc.

As for bonding - why can't other people bond with baby in other ways? Cuddling, changing, bathing, singing, walking, talking etc.

Breastfeeding is the most important way a mother can protect her baby - why jeopardise that?

 

[sarah_lou1981]

I'm not breast feeding so cant offer any advice in that respect but I agree with you re the bonding thing. Tom and Cole have bonded so well, but Dads of BF babies bond over play, bath time etc. In fact, Tom didn't want me to BF (although he didn't tell me this until I said I wasn't) as he wanted to be able to feed Cole too. I do know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula feeding too. For my own, very personal, reasons breast wouldn't have been best and I absolutely detest that saying as it can make women who don't bf feel like they are doing something wrong. Anyway, I digress I'd say just give it a go if that's what you want and see what happens. You might find that you're feeding all the time and need the break that FF can offer or it might be the best thing you've ever done and you might take to it like a duck to water xx

 

[missy1978]

Yes I'm exclusively BFing. DD has never had a bottle - she's 9.5 months. I've tried a couple of times with expressed milk but she doesn't know how and to be honest I like it that way. It's what babies are meant to do and you only have to read a tiny bit to learn the benefits of breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is the hardest thing I've ever done. I cried pretty much every feed for 12 weeks. But the thought of her having formula upset me more than the thought of the physical pain and lack of sleep. If you truly want to breastfeed don't pump until after 3 months or you can risk your supply and baby getting nipple confusion. Yes it's tiring, exhausting agony for a few weeks - but no one said doing the best for your baby is easy and I'll be doing it all over again for the next one. And once you're past the hurdles at the start BFing is waaaaay easier than faffing about with bottles and sterilisers etc. As for bonding - why can't other people bond with baby in other ways? Cuddling, changing, bathing, singing, walking, talking etc. Breastfeeding is the most important way a mother can protect her baby - why jeopardise that?

Wow. I can't say this hasn't upset me tbh. Way to lay on the guilt thick. And I yes I realise why I feel guilty and that it's not your problem. I felt like a failure before for not being up to exclusively bf my son, now I feel like even more of a failure.

Because you know what? I was crying through every feed too. And it was affecting my mental health and my relationship with my baby. Which was in turn affecting him. So I took steps to remedy that and that means his dad giving one bottle a day. Apparently makes me a terrible person? Well so be it.

You can take your sanctimonious attitude elsewhere quite frankly. I'm honestly so angry I'm shaking right now.

 

[missy1978]

I'm not breast feeding so cant offer any advice in that respect but I agree with you re the bonding thing. Tom and Cole have bonded so well, but Dads of BF babies bond over play, bath time etc. In fact, Tom didn't want me to BF (although he didn't tell me this until I said I wasn't) as he wanted to be able to feed Cole too. I do know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula feeding too. For my own, very personal, reasons breast wouldn't have been best and I absolutely detest that saying as it can make women who don't bf feel like they are doing something wrong. Anyway, I digress I'd say just give it a go if that's what you want and see what happens. You might find that you're feeding all the time and need the break that FF can offer or it might be the best thing you've ever done and you might take to it like a duck to water xx

Spot on. It's a personal decision for us all to make for us and our families. And we all do what we feel is best for our babies. In my case it's best for my son to have a mummy who isn't sobbing her eyes out every time she feeds him and is actually able to enjoy time with him without resenting and dreading every feed.

And I refuse to feel any worse than I already do about it! No one should ever feel bad about their parenting choices if they are made in the best interests of their child.

 

[pjallen1982]

Wow. I can't say this hasn't upset me tbh. Way to lay on the guilt thick. And I yes I realise why I feel guilty and that it's not your problem. I felt like a failure before for not being up to exclusively bf my son, now I feel like even more of a failure. Because you know what? I was crying through every feed too. And it was affecting my mental health and my relationship with my baby. Which was in turn affecting him. So I took steps to remedy that and that means his dad giving one bottle a day. Apparently makes me a terrible person? Well so be it. You can take your sanctimonious attitude elsewhere quite frankly. I'm honestly so angry I'm shaking right now.

Missy you are not the only one who felt like that reading this response. You know I think you're doing amazing and to be honest whether someone breast feeds or doesn't is totally their personal decision. What works for one person, doesn't for another. That doesn't make someone weaker or a worse parent.

My advice to anyone, given I've tried bf, is try it of you want but don't feel guilty if you don't.

Bringing up a child is hard, and a parents happiness is more important to a child than if they were bf or not.

 

[pjallen1982]

I'm not breast feeding so cant offer any advice in that respect but I agree with you re the bonding thing. Tom and Cole have bonded so well, but Dads of BF babies bond over play, bath time etc. In fact, Tom didn't want me to BF (although he didn't tell me this until I said I wasn't) as he wanted to be able to feed Cole too. I do know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula feeding too. For my own, very personal, reasons breast wouldn't have been best and I absolutely detest that saying as it can make women who don't bf feel like they are doing something wrong. Anyway, I digress I'd say just give it a go if that's what you want and see what happens. You might find that you're feeding all the time and need the break that FF can offer or it might be the best thing you've ever done and you might take to it like a duck to water xx

Great response. You're a fab mum, bf or not. X

 

[sarah_lou1981]

Spot on. It's a personal decision for us all to make for us and our families. And we all do what we feel is best for our babies. In my case it's best for my son to have a mummy who isn't sobbing her eyes out every time she feeds him and is actually able to enjoy time with him without resenting and dreading every feed.

And I refuse to feel any worse than I already do about it! No one should ever feel bad about their parenting choices if they are made in the best interests of their child.

My point exactly hun. The previous post angered me too. Not sure whether it was intended to sound preachy but it came across that way to me. I would die for my baby. Just because I choose to exclusively FF doesn't make me a bad Mum. I would never judge someone's personal choices. We've all been there through your struggles and you've done amazingly but your posts are far more positive now that Colin is doing a feed a day. Happy mummy = happy baby!!!xxx

 

[pjallen1982]

My point exactly hun. The previous post angered me too. Not sure whether it was intended to sound preachy but it came across that way to me. I would die for my baby. Just because I choose to exclusively FF doesn't make me a bad Mum. I would never judge someone's personal choices. We've all been there through your struggles and you've done amazingly but your posts are far more positive now that Colin is doing a feed a day. Happy mummy = happy baby!!!xxx

LIKE!

 

[Jess<3]

Thanks ladies I'm glad there are others who feel the same, I do feel feeding is bonding, not just bathing, walking and cuddles. I love how dependant they are on you feeding them and have always need this as a bonding which should be between mums and dads. Hense why I didn't want to just BF as o was Rob to feed too!
I find that abit mean about not breastfeeding,I didn't with my son as I was on very stong medication for problems with my knees which have had surgery for. Otherwise I would of tried...
It's not bad formula feeding either otherwise they wouldn't make formula for babies!
Your a good parent if baby is ff or bf.

Didnt really help that much with reply as it made me feel like I should BF no matter what and I'm bad if I don't?!

 

[PrincessPeach]

Hope you're ok ladies x no one should be made to feel bad when they are doing their very best for their baby - whether that be bf or ff! I hate all of the pressure that surrounds bf - I've said all along I will give it a go if I can when baby is born, but for whatever reason - mentally and/or physically, or even if I just simply decide I cannot continue - then I won't. My baby will STILL be ok and healthy on formula. Happy mummy = Happy Baby at the end of the day. Nothing will be "jeopardised" by switching to formula?!

Anyway. Hope everyone is ok xx

 

[ksmiuk]

I can not stand the sanctimonious attitude of some people.
As a medical professional I have had to advise lots of mums to not breast feed for many and varied reasons and it had often broken their hearts because of this attitude that your a bad mum if you don't breast feed. Yes breast feeding is wonderful if you can do it, but it is not the be and end all.
I don't know if I will be able to breast feed due to previous breast surgery and if I can't my attitude will be I gave it my best shot and I will either combi feed or formula feed.
Mums need to do what's best for them and their babies, no 2 mums and no 2 babies are the same.