Total Solution Restart 29/03/2015 Exante journey to 9st3 for life!
- Thread starter Lara1986
- Start date
Wow a month away!!that would be amazing! Where are you going?
Thailand, Cambodia and Vietnam. An adventure
flying alone and exploring. Will probably meet a friend or two for some of it.
yoyoagogo
Gold Member
Thailand, Cambodia and Vietnam. An adventure
That will be amazing! Very jealous! Xx
Louloubelle1978
Full Member
Hi Lara! Stunning dress and you look fantastic!
I hope it's also boosted your confidence - If it says size 8 on the tag, Take it as an 8 lol!
And what an amazing incentive for you in regards to your holiday - it sounds amazing! Xx
I hope it's also boosted your confidence - If it says size 8 on the tag, Take it as an 8 lol!
And what an amazing incentive for you in regards to your holiday - it sounds amazing! Xx
Haha!! Size 8 it is then.
Booked a haircut for 5th December and it was exciting to think I should be 9st7 or less by then. A normal weight. The end is in sight for us.. X
CrazyLadyA
Silver Member
Lookin great! Well done!
Trip sounds amazing.. Xx
Have a good day x
Trip sounds amazing.. Xx
Have a good day x
2 pounds off since Tuesday, when I was upset over the 1 pound loss. Just goes to show, patience is so important. This morning I am 10stone3.
My Tuesday goal is 10st1.5. That probably isn't possible because I'm having a meal Saturday lunch time, alcohol in evening (will skip breakfast and any other food other than the meal, and keep the meal as low carb as the menu allows) and then a meal Sunday (again will skip breakfast that day and save the cals for the meal!).
It would be great if I could still lose another pound by official week 6 weigh in (Tuesday), but this weekend has been planned for ages and is a very close friends 30th so no regrets on having vodka and diet coke with her and her friends! Plus the lunch time date has been a long fine planning now.. And would just look odd if I refused lunch and said let's do something else when he is asking me and planning it!
My Tuesday goal is 10st1.5. That probably isn't possible because I'm having a meal Saturday lunch time, alcohol in evening (will skip breakfast and any other food other than the meal, and keep the meal as low carb as the menu allows) and then a meal Sunday (again will skip breakfast that day and save the cals for the meal!).
It would be great if I could still lose another pound by official week 6 weigh in (Tuesday), but this weekend has been planned for ages and is a very close friends 30th so no regrets on having vodka and diet coke with her and her friends! Plus the lunch time date has been a long fine planning now.. And would just look odd if I refused lunch and said let's do something else when he is asking me and planning it!
One other thing. I was looking through old pictures as I am putting together a big photo collage for my brothers birthday present. And I came across some from when I was anorexic. Pretty scary to see. I wasn't like a skeletal person. But my memory of how I looked was so different to the pictures - I thought I was bigger. My arms were literally little sticks. And I looked exhausted and forced myself to smile in the pictures. I could see my pain. My hair look thin, awful and dry (my hair is huge long thick and wavy now!). And this was about 10pounds higher than my lowest weight. I saw one pic that I remember seeing at the time thinking Looked fat in it.... I was wearing size 6 crop trousers. Enough said!!! They were holiday pictures but I was wearing long sleeved tops a lot of the time. I guess I hated my body, was always cold, and didn't want people to see my weight loss.
Now the craziest bit. I started my diet that led to anorexia at age 17, weight 9stone7. 9stone7.....! I was fine all along. I could have started running and toned up. I didn't need to start what's led to this insane weight fluctuations and swings between different patterns of disordered eating. But it happened, and I must learn from it. I used to eat probably max 500cals a day so I suppose it's like someone staying on a VLCD for months and months when they are of normal weight.
I know I've rambled but I suppose these thoughts are all part of the journey. If that girl could see how fat I was a month ago she would say "I told you eating makes you fat!" But armed with knowledge I have now I would tell her "no, hating yourself makes you miserable no matter how you chose to punish your body"
Now the craziest bit. I started my diet that led to anorexia at age 17, weight 9stone7. 9stone7.....! I was fine all along. I could have started running and toned up. I didn't need to start what's led to this insane weight fluctuations and swings between different patterns of disordered eating. But it happened, and I must learn from it. I used to eat probably max 500cals a day so I suppose it's like someone staying on a VLCD for months and months when they are of normal weight.
I know I've rambled but I suppose these thoughts are all part of the journey. If that girl could see how fat I was a month ago she would say "I told you eating makes you fat!" But armed with knowledge I have now I would tell her "no, hating yourself makes you miserable no matter how you chose to punish your body"
bob123
Silver Member
This actually gave me goosebumps... What a brilliant attitude you now have, the bit about hating yourself making you miserable is so true... Very inspirational thought for a Friday morning!
Louloubelle1978
Full Member
Hi Lara, echo what the others have said - you have truly been through so much. I am also glad that you got through it and have learnt from your experience. You sharing it, I hope, will also help others that may have somehow come to read your diary also.
I know it can take a long time to "wise up" and you made it! It's great that you have such a great and healthy attitude to your body now.
The best of luck on your date tomorrow too - will be stalking here to see how it went! And most importantly HAVE FUN!! You deserve it xxx
I know it can take a long time to "wise up" and you made it! It's great that you have such a great and healthy attitude to your body now.
The best of luck on your date tomorrow too - will be stalking here to see how it went! And most importantly HAVE FUN!! You deserve it xxx
Ahh thank you - what lovely messages all 3. It does feel very vulnerable sometimes, the things we reveal on here, but I think it's necessary to bare all and be honest as we are all going through our journeys.
LLB thanks. I'm cringing already about the date. He's sent me the location and it's a posh restaurant. Seems rather formal for lunch. The menu is confusing and really was confusing me on what to get - there is fish and pheasant - that's the protein options I found but I don't really fully understand some of the menu, it seems some of it is cooked in butter and things like that. Maybe it will be teeny portions. I really don't want to have many calories. Especially as I'll be drinking that eve. I may have a glass of wine with lunch if I need it (I would much rather have vodka but I really think it's not a good look to have that on a lunch date in a fancy restaurant?!)
I'm looking forwards to seeing my friend and my brother the following day. I got creative with their gifts so am excited to see their reactions!
My mum today said to me "it's good you're losing the weight slowly" and it annoyed me because I thought no I'm not it's quick, it's probably because I have more to lose it looks slow. It made me want to push myself more and show her just how much weight I could lose, but then I realised I already have a great plan and that she was only trying to be supportive!
Thanks again to you ladies for your supportive words. Warming and reassuring to hear (read).
Xx
LLB thanks. I'm cringing already about the date. He's sent me the location and it's a posh restaurant. Seems rather formal for lunch. The menu is confusing and really was confusing me on what to get - there is fish and pheasant - that's the protein options I found but I don't really fully understand some of the menu, it seems some of it is cooked in butter and things like that. Maybe it will be teeny portions. I really don't want to have many calories. Especially as I'll be drinking that eve. I may have a glass of wine with lunch if I need it (I would much rather have vodka but I really think it's not a good look to have that on a lunch date in a fancy restaurant?!)
I'm looking forwards to seeing my friend and my brother the following day. I got creative with their gifts so am excited to see their reactions!
My mum today said to me "it's good you're losing the weight slowly" and it annoyed me because I thought no I'm not it's quick, it's probably because I have more to lose it looks slow. It made me want to push myself more and show her just how much weight I could lose, but then I realised I already have a great plan and that she was only trying to be supportive!
Thanks again to you ladies for your supportive words. Warming and reassuring to hear (read).
Xx
Louloubelle1978
Full Member
Hi Lara,
Oooooh sounds like a lovely restaurant - maybe just stick to fish if everything is cooked in butter? Usually I would say if you stick to super low carb, butter is ok however I know you need the carbs for drinks! Rock and a hard place! I would order fish or chicken with veggies and new potatoes (ask for no butter on those) to keep cal content as low as you can. Hopefully they can accomodate? Whatever you decide, I hope you have a great date!
It also sounds like you have a lovely weekend planned - I'm sure your brother and friend will love their super thoughtful gifts too xx
Oooooh sounds like a lovely restaurant - maybe just stick to fish if everything is cooked in butter? Usually I would say if you stick to super low carb, butter is ok however I know you need the carbs for drinks! Rock and a hard place! I would order fish or chicken with veggies and new potatoes (ask for no butter on those) to keep cal content as low as you can. Hopefully they can accomodate? Whatever you decide, I hope you have a great date!
It also sounds like you have a lovely weekend planned - I'm sure your brother and friend will love their super thoughtful gifts too
xxHi Lara, Oooooh sounds like a lovely restaurant - maybe just stick to fish if everything is cooked in butter? Usually I would say if you stick to super low carb, butter is ok however I know you need the carbs for drinks! Rock and a hard place! I would order fish or chicken with veggies and new potatoes (ask for no butter on those) to keep cal content as low as you can. Hopefully they can accomodate? Whatever you decide, I hope you have a great date! It also sounds like you have a lovely weekend planned - I'm sure your brother and friend will love their super thoughtful gifts too
EEek Thanks. Am a little nervous now!!
The thing is I think the fish is cooked in butter. I'm not sure, it's a fancy menu so it confused me haha.
I am embarrassed to ask if it's cooked in butter. I know it sounds silly but I always like to give people the impression that I don't really care about weight, and would hate anyone to know i am dieting. I think it's because it draws more attention to the issue. Especially with a stranger!
But yes I think I will go for fish and vegetables, and just hope they haven't been drenched in oil or butter. I won't eat much of it. Will just say I'm not that hungry and maybe have a glass of wine.
I only had one pack yesterday and a couple of bits of broccoli. So really I saved 400 calories from that which will help towards the meal. I might skip the morning packs too so really I have even more calories in the bank. I need to leave by 12 noon so not that long to avoid eating and I will have tea with almond milk!
Jenjeanie
Full Member
What an inspiration you are. Isn't hindsight wonderful, I look back at photos from my teens and 20s and I hated how I looked, there was nothing wrong with me. I'd give my eye teeth to be that size again lol x
