Story thread

[devonbabe]

another layer of paper. the parcel was wrapped in a copy of the Goat Herders News.

Lionel chuckled with glee, and began whistling his favourite tune from the sound of music ...'high on a hill was lonely goatheard, yodel ley yodeleyy heee

the idylic whistling scene was soon shattered when the last remnants of wrapping paper fell to the floor, and Lionel found he was holding in his hands..........

 

[CW Consultant]

the skeletal hand that was last seen on the floor in the cave with the eery green light and the dank damp smell

 

[Mrs Depp]

Suddenly, the fingers started twitching, slowly at first then more furiously. The hand then turned and shot out it's index finger and middle finger right into Lionel's nostrils, poking them so hard that he gave a gasp!

"GASP!" said Lionel..........

 

[devonbabe]

Crikey !! that feels better...really cleared my sinus's....that massive bogey had been plagueing me for days...

the fingers burrowed deeper into Lionels nasel passage...he gasped again....GASP!....he grabbed the skeletal wrist and tried desperatly to pull the hand away from his face.

with one final tug...and a massive GASP! the fingers were loose. Lionels own hands covered his bloody nose as he writhed in agony, the tears of pain running down his cheeks.

then he saw what the hand was holding...covered in snot and dripping onto his B&Q laminate flooring

the fingers had found something buried deep inside Lionels head...... the fingers were holding..............

 

[sonkie]

a ring.........!!!! a bright shiny ring that glowed, if you looked carefully it was inscribed. All of a sudden Golom came along, and was calling for his "precious".........the sound was echoing now "my precious, my precious"..........

The skeletal hand tried to run away but ..............

 

[devonbabe]

Precious was his small white fluffy dog, Precious had grabbed the skeletal hand thinking it was a bonio, and was running around with it in his jaws his tail wagging excitedly.

the ring, fell to the floor and rolled under the...

 

[Mrs Depp]

beautiful brand new brown leather couch/settee/sofa which Johnny and Keira had only recently purchased from their Freemans catalogue. It was a good match to their oak coloured B&Q laminate and had raspberry coloured cushions which were squishy without being floppy.

Johnny nosedived under the couch to retreive the ring..............

 

[devonbabe]

Precious dived under too, and a battle commenced...Johnny stretching under the sofa legs flailing behind him to reach the ring, whilst the fluffy white dog thought it was all a great game and dropped the skeletal hand ,made a run for the ring and promply swallowed it!

the skeletal hand grabbed precious by the tail, Precious yelped and....

 

[CW Consultant]

hoped the bony fingers would not try and retrieve the ring

 

[Mrs Depp]

Just then there was a loud bang outside.................

 

[devonbabe]

what was that? shreeked Kiera

 

[CW Consultant]

A large cannon ball landed by their front door and in the distance they could see about a dozen angry pirates and Golum racing towards them.

They have come for the ring! The dog look worried to say the least

 

[devonbabe]

upon closer inspection is wasnt a cannon ball at all...it was a large water melon stolen from a far away tropical island by the pirates.

it landed with a splat, and all the pips shot up into the air.

instead of the pips splattering to the ground, they grew wings and tiny tails and flew around golums head, he flapped his hands around his ears

the noise from their tiny wings were deafening.. they were baby melondragons and they were protectors of the ring.

the sword brandishing pirates backed off...untill one of them said..........

 

[Fuzzys Angel]

......Jesus christ! Look at that beautiful brand new brown leather couch/settee/sofa recently purchased from their Freemans catalogue. I wonder if they'd let me order one, it'll look great on our decks....

 

[CW Consultant]

The baby melondragons starting scratching and biting at the beautiful brand new brown leather couch/settee/sofa recently purchased from their Freemans catalogue, wonder if we are covered by our guarantee they thought

Prescious thought this was great fun and chased the baby melondragons also clawing and scratching the new beautiful brand new brown leather couch/settee/sofa recently purchased from their Freemans catalogue. This has taken their mind of the ring and the fact I ate it he thought

Then suddenly there was a strange noise and another crashing sound outside, they all rushed out to find the tardis and the doctor standing there in his operating greens and wearing long rubber gloves, time to retrieve the ring .......................

 

[sonkie]

Poor precious yelped and ran away, so the dr decided he would take a seat on the new brown leather couch/settee/sofa but the rips and tears in it now were huge so he sunk right into the sofa and disappeared .....when he opened his eyes he was in..................

 

[Fuzzys Angel]

.....right in the middle of wembley stadium watching Metallica! "This isn't right?" the doctor said, looking around. He spotted fuzzys angel grabbing at James Hetfield's......

 

[Mrs Depp]

rather large bulky ................................................. BOOTS!!!

"Those boots are mine!" shouted the Doc to Fuzzy's Angel.

"No they're not they're mine! These boots were made for walking and that's just what they'll do!" answered Fuzzy.

So she started grabbing James Hetfield by the ankles and soon he was on his knees in front of her....................

 

[sonkie]

He was begging her not to take his boots he lived and slept in them, "take me take me and not my boots" he replied. Fuzzy`s angel just couldnt refuse so she whisked him to ....................................

 

[Mrs Depp]

the car park and straight into the band's private tour bus for some lurrrrvin!

Then she took his boots off!..............................