mod-karen79
rainbows holiday buddy :)
sphincter! teeheheheheheeee! i don't know why but that word makes me laugh every time!
SW & Xenical ?
- Thread starter Zoe
- Start date
slimmerkay
Silver Member
Wow - small world!
slimmerkay
Silver Member
Hi Sandra
What class do you go to?
What class do you go to?
slimmerkay
Silver Member
Sandra and Aislinn - check out my thread on the butcher that sells SW foods. He's based at Oswaldtwistle Mills near Accrington.
OMG thanks for cheering me up I have not laughed so much for along I am still giggling now typing this. That was so funny even though it probably wasnt for you at the time.
I think you have to have a certain amount to lose and a certain BMI, but not sure, different drs might have different guidlelines. I had to lose some weight first on my own to prove to dr i was cutting down seriously.
Taz
Spam Hunter
Oh no, please tell us more!
aislinn
Full Member
See now Taz I feel like I am going into confession!
…………..Xenical made me stand back when I knew someone else had taken my blame.
Whilst visiting a client (Ms Smith) I needed a wee – which was fine as I’d known her a while. Anyway even though I tried my hardest to stop – some poo and the orange stuff slipped out.
I was horrified in my books a number two in a clients toilet is a no no. I desperately tried to clean the bowl with toilet paper (I didn’t want to stain the brush). The toilet was in a room by itself with no toilet cleaner available the sink held a tablet of soap, my bag and bottle of detergent was in the lounge…….and time was ticking away.
I eventually flushed with my eyes closed praying that everything would be swept away. I slowly opened them again only to find that the orange greasy scum was swirling around the bowel and settling back over the surface of the water - $**%!!
Now I had that dilemma do I flush again – then Ms Smith would know that there was something other than a wee in her toilet OR do I step away??
I cowardly chose the latter wash my hands and went back downstairs.
About half an hour later Ms Smith excuses herself and says that she is nipping to the toilet. I went cold……..then hot ………then cold.
She dashed up the stairs I heard the toilet door close then heard her shriek ‘Johnny what the $**%ing hell have you put down me toilet? You know I’ve got the social downstairs!!’ This was closely followed by what I took to be a slap with Ms Smith shouting ‘get in your $**%ing room and stay there!’
Ms Smith stormed through the lounge into the kitchen and rushed back through clutching a bottle of toilet cleaner muttering that the toilet is covered in orange stuff and now it’s all over the brush. The best I could say was ‘don’t be too hard on him, boys will be boys’.
I quickly concluded my visit and left. As I got into my car I looked up at the window and waved guiltily at Johnny knowing that he would indeed be grounded all day………………….all down to Xenical
Aislinn x
* The names have been changed to protect identity AND the innocent!! *
LMAO another funny story you make me laugh. You could make a book I would buy it lol.
aislinn
Full Member
………….then there was the time when I thought there you go again Aislinn being all modern and with it – serves you right!
I’d lost a few pounds and was feeling……..you know a bit more feminine. So when the other half gave me that look as I walked into the bedroom I thought ‘ding dong’, go for it let’s get down and dirty!!
Instead of flicking the lights off I thought lets show him what he’s playing with tonight.
So the light stayed on………….well as I began to get into ‘it’ my stomach began rumbling and lets just say certain positions puts additional pressure on ones bowels…………...yep you guessed it – Xenical reared its ugly head. That small release of gas (I say release of gas in case there are any men reading this as women do not break wind – gas escapes from us and it is silent and odourless…..usually) was followed by the Xenical tinge – a trickle of orange liquid!!!
Now if we had been getting jiggy with it the dark I would have had felt the orange liquid pretended (now Taz and Sonban have made me give my ‘I need to get out of this’ secret away) to have cramp limped to the loo and he would have been disappointed, none the wiser and asleep by the time I came out of the bathroom. Giving me a chance to get rid of the Xenical evidence.
Instead he shouts ‘what on earth is that??’
Eek……………… I was so glad that we have been married for 22 years and could remind him of our vows – for better or for worse…………..
Aislinn x
I’d lost a few pounds and was feeling……..you know a bit more feminine. So when the other half gave me that look as I walked into the bedroom I thought ‘ding dong’, go for it let’s get down and dirty!!
Instead of flicking the lights off I thought lets show him what he’s playing with tonight.
So the light stayed on………….well as I began to get into ‘it’ my stomach began rumbling and lets just say certain positions puts additional pressure on ones bowels…………...yep you guessed it – Xenical reared its ugly head. That small release of gas (I say release of gas in case there are any men reading this as women do not break wind – gas escapes from us and it is silent and odourless…..usually) was followed by the Xenical tinge – a trickle of orange liquid!!!
Now if we had been getting jiggy with it the dark I would have had felt the orange liquid pretended (now Taz and Sonban have made me give my ‘I need to get out of this’ secret away) to have cramp limped to the loo and he would have been disappointed, none the wiser and asleep by the time I came out of the bathroom. Giving me a chance to get rid of the Xenical evidence.
Instead he shouts ‘what on earth is that??’
Eek……………… I was so glad that we have been married for 22 years and could remind him of our vows – for better or for worse…………..
Aislinn x
shrinkingsue
Full Member
Lol Im howling here my hubby is giving me some strange looks but your secrets safe with me, you have really cheered me up 2n xx
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