RainbowRose
Gold Member
wow, well done, great loss!
Keep right on that track, it's working!!!!
Keep right on that track, it's working!!!!
I'm struggling.
I was doing really well up to April but then work stress exploded, and I slipped and just used my birthday and the bank holidays as excuses..and now all of a sudden it's June and I feel like a huge failure.
Your not a failure...you have actually took time off....you have a life time ahead of you and to get to our goals we all have to balance are expectations. Its not an over night change and with that in mind we are all going to stray and we will all come back , some take longer than others but eventually it will happen. the more you worry the more you wont see the way to walk. Say to your self..."today i am going to worry about it and then thats it" dont let worry become your preocupation it won't leave enough room in your subconciouse for you to pick up your healthier choice living option.
I have tried on and off the last few weeks but I know my head isn't in the right place. I'm going to make an appointment with the doctor to talk it all through with someone - I hope they can help me but it's nerve wracking because I'm worried they're just going to go at me because of my weight - my obesity (I hate that word) - or my being a 'doughnut monster' as the Daily Mail calls us.
No doughnut monsters on this site hun, just a large boat with alot of people making great efforts and steps to reach the horizon x
I very rarely go to the doctors but on the occasions I do I feel like 'the fat girl in the news' - you know the one who is a burden on the country's resources - who eats nothing but cake and has no quality of life.
As my diet improved it was the change in my mental attitude that shocked me the most, i hadnt related foods to depression as much before but now i see why i was down for so long. You can change your mind set once you get yourself going again there is a reward internaly not just externaly
The frustrating thing is that is the opposite of me - I am self sufficient, I work full time, I have lovely friends and family, a fantastic OH and I do, and have always, paid tax and NI and I eat well - really well; I grow my own veggies, get boxes from Abel and Cole and bake my own bread.
You dont have to explain yourself to anyone hun, you are who you are the fact you are actually on a website seeking friends in the same position means you want change, but seriously don't do it for anyone but you.
Anyone who would judge you certainly doesnt deserve acknowledgment of thier own existance let alone anyone elses
But it doesn't matter because I'm fat and that's all there is to me. I wish I felt like that in my heart because it might make me more motivated to get thin, but - and I feel ashamed to say this - I don't mind myself. GOOD!!!
I don't see myself as fat, I mean when I look in the mirror I can see that I am - it's a fact but I don't feel it; I don't dislike myself.
Thats more like it! ( i had wondered where this was going lol)
Basically I have issues with food, big ones - and I haven't even begun to get the bottom of them. I suspect until I do I'll always have a skewed relationship with food.
Relationship with food? whats that? lol
I want to do this properly; I don't want to come out the other end with disordered eating or to put all the weight back on because my issues aren't resolved. I've been thinking about a VLCD but I think it's just panic thinking; I had been doing so well on calorie counting and portion control...I think I just need to chill.
Chillaxing to the maximum is the best way to get recentred.
Find a place where you can sit and watch the world walk by, the sun shining and may be a water fall or something.
Sink into the surroundings and go find yourself
I just feel a bit lost, and a bit stressed. And all I want is a bar of chocolate. I am rubbish!! :break_diet: