This time I will do it!!...

Nothing wrong with that hun some of the best decisions are made after a sleep lol.

I know it would be hard, but could you make something when you get home from visiting for the next day? Then at least you know your having at least one SW friendly meal. I know exactly what you mean about stopping and piling the weight back on, I did this when my mam was ill.

I lost 3.5 stones, then when we were nursing her we grabbed whatever we could, pies, pasties, kebabs etc and I piled it all back on and more besides. Once mam had passed away I messed around with WW i kept joining then stopping etc, It was the same when I nursed dad. Then in May last year, I just thought right ive had enough I need to do this for me. This time around it just clicked. The plan will still be here when your ready hun. Its a case of making the best of a bad situation at the moment, dont make yourself ill by worrying about it. x
 
I like being thinner and feeling more confident and i don't want to lose that but I also feel inmense guilt

I'm at the hospital at least once normally twice a day and the hospital is a 45min drive away so I'm on the road most of the day.
I miss my kids and feel guilty for not being there and I'm starting to feel awful about the amount of time I've taken off at work. Even though it's my annual leave, most people take weeks off but I've been taking odd hours/days so it seems that I'm off a the time!

I also need to get back to the doctors myself, I've been having awful 'wobbly' spells and need to take my IBS food diary back...

On the note of IBS, if that's what is wrong with me, eating all the cr@p won't help...

Ah I'm rambling now lol x
 
Not rambling at all its good to get it off ya chest. I have IBS ( had it since I was 3yrs old) its not nice. Stress actually makes it worse so im not surprised your feeling wobbly. Your bound to feel guilt hun as your kiddies are only little its part of being a mum. You cant tear yourself into pieces and be there for everyone. They are a bit young to understand whats going on so try not to be too hard on yourself, you will make up for it when your dad is on the mend. Make up for it with lots of kisses and cuddles. What you need is the support from your OH at home, and unless work have said anything to you I wouldnt worry about that either. This is all so easy for me to say I know, I would just hate to read that your poorly next because of all the stress. I wish there was something I could say or do to help hun I do feel for you. Im here though if you need someone to sound off at, we all need a rant lol
 
Thanks hun. I do appreciate your support. Makes me feel better just to come in here and know that some one else knows what I'm going through xx
 
Right!

Back to plan. I don't want to be 'the fat one' again and I'm enjoying being slimmer.

I don't enjoy junk food anymore so I need to pull my finger out and start preparing healthy meals to tuck into when I come back from the hospital.

Even though I have loads going on, I still need to look after myself.

Talk over, time to start doing! X
 
Right!

Back to plan. I don't want to be 'the fat one' again and I'm enjoying being slimmer.

I don't enjoy junk food anymore so I need to pull my finger out and start preparing healthy meals to tuck into when I come back from the hospital.

Even though I have loads going on, I still need to look after myself.

Talk over, time to start doing! X

Fab positive attitude you can do this :) xx
 
Hi hun - Love the attitude :D its good you slept on it. You have done so well this far to just let it slip, well done you on not letting it beat you. xx
 
Thanks hun :)

Not a 100% day today but I have tried to stick to plan as much as possible and have at least counted my syns.
Hoping for a 100% day tomorrow!

Food:
HExA = Nothing
HExB = 20 Almonds

BREAKFAST:
Mullerlight Greek 0.5 syns

LUNCH:
Pineapple, grapes and apple fruit pot
Melon fruit pot
HExB

DINNER:
Mash, SW Roasties, Chicken, Brocoli, Cauliflower, Carrots, Peas and Gravy (4 syns)

SNACKS:
6x Thorntons chocolates (18 syns) - didn't realise how many syns they were!!!

TOTAL SYNS = 22.5 SYNS

Much better than the 100+ I've had for the last few days!
Scales showing a 2.5lb gain but I'll deal with that on Thursday, get back to plan 100% and gym next week and hopefully my gain will be gone!
Positive mind frame.

Although the increasing amount of loose skin is bothering me but I haven't got too much time to think of that at the mo. Will deal with that once I reach target. I look okay on clothes and that's the main thing. Only me and OH see me in the buff!
 
Another bad day. Seems that I have something that would normally be accounted for in my daily syns - like chocolate - and because I've been way over everyday this week, I think I've blown it and end up bingeing day.

I WANT to get back on plan. I DO NOT want to go back to being the fat one.

I toyed with the idea of not going to group on Thursday and just sticking to plan on my own next week so I don't have another gain in my book but I know that it's likely to turn into 2 bad weeks then as I've already shown how hard I'm finding it getting back on plan by stuffing all week.

I've decided I will go to group, accept what gain I have had and will stick to plan 100% next week and will hopefully see a good loss.

To boost my spirits I've got a nice dress, tights and heels to wear to work tomorrow. Unusual for me but I thought if i felt good it may help me stick to plan.

I was only 11lb off target last week. Regardless of any gain I have this week, I'm close enough to target that I can see it! I will not give up. My weight will be a lifelong battle for me, this is just one blip in the road, no doubt there will be more and so I need to learn how to deal with things without quitting on myself/eating my own weight in junk food.

I've also just had a clearout of my wardrobe - everything too big/tatty/unflattering has gone. All I have left are Size 12'a & 10's so I must do this!

Without it sounding too much like a speech, thanks for all the ongoing support. Life would be much harder without you!

Onwards and downwards!!
 
:clap::clap: - All I have to say is well done hun. I admire your spirit for not giving up. You have made the right decision to go to WI on Thursday, if you didnt you would as you say binge and try to do it yourself, and then next week will come around and you would put off going again, then the guilt starts eating you up. Your doing fantastic all things considering, and its brill that you have taken a look at how close to target you are. Its within reaching distance, dont let it escape you. It may take a little bit longer but you will get there. It would be a lot easier to put back on what you have lost, and then how bad would you feel.

I wish I had the courage to throw all my stuff out I might have to take a leaf out of your book :D you see , you may be having a bad time but without realising you are helping others. We all have bad patches hun, but the strongest people are the ones that come out the other side smiling, that person will be you.

Dont give up on yourself, stick with it. Its hard right now but it will be worth it, even if your up and down for a month, its 4 weeks where you would have gotten heavier and heavier had you not joined SW. Chin up love xx
 
Thanks hun. I think I'm getting back into the right mindset - one day at a time.

I had to throw my clothes out, otherwise I know I would put on weight and not really notice as I'd as have things in my wardrobe that would fit. Now I can't put on weight as can't afford to buy new clothes lol.

Expecting at least a 4lb gain this week but it will be gone by next week hopefully so not too worried.

How are you hun? Haven't had chance to be on mini's much the last few days x
 
4lb ( if you even gain that) will be off in no time dont worry about it. I think its great your even thinking about the plan considering what you have got going on right now.

Im fine thanks hun - back is aching this morning cos ive hoovered the stairs down and done all the bedrooms and living room. Im knackered.com now lol. Hoping to chill now until WI - my scales show 2 on so will just accept it and get that off for next week.
 
You will do it hun. You've been poorly and your constant back pain can't be helping.

We're both getting close to target now, if we knuckle down we'll be there by summer! :) x
 
First day on plan all week and it feels great!

Today's food:
HExA = Nothing
HExB = 20 Almonds

BREAKFAST:
Mullerlight Greek (0.5 syns)

LUNCH:
HExB
Pineapple
McCoys Crisps (8.5 syns)

DINNER:
Quorn Meatballs, Peppers, Mushrooms, Peas, Onions and Garlic in passasta seasoned with Smoked Paprika, Chilli Powder and a Stockpot

SNACKS:
Garden Peas
Curly Wurly (6 syns)



TOTAL SYNS = 15 SYNS
 
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