TOUGH LOVE-APPLY WITHIN

abstay said:
TL required....... Lost 2lb after a "naughty" weekend and am now easing my foot off the healthy eating pedal. Lots of wine and snacks, even ordered the mixed starter with loads of fried goodies in the Thai last night -aaaaarrrrrrgggghhhhhhh! And I'm only 1.5 lbs away from 2 stone loss, it'll soon be more..........

Are naughty weekends and fried starters part of your diet plan??!! Didn't think so!! Why are you drinking wine? Of all the boozy drinks you could choose, wine is one of the worst!! You need to have a serious think about why you want to lose weight and make sure it's higher in your priorities list than chowing down on a calorific Thai and wine!!

Your naughty weekend will probably catch you up next weigh day so this week you will have to work your butt off. The good thing is that you have recognised that you are headed down a slippery slope - now what you need to do is decide if you want results, or excuses. As Rod will tell you.....you can't have both!

This forum is tough on weaknesses but we also share eachothers success and celebrate it. Stick with us and you will soon learn that you prefer the well done's to the tellings off! In here we post WI details, confessions, tough love and prevention/preparation for meals out/weekends away etc to help eachother stay on the straight and narrow! 'The Lounge' (tough love - off subject) is for chit chat so head on over there if you want to talk about jean sizes or crazy neighbours (you will catch my drift if you come on in)

Straighten up now and post us more info on your plan, your stats and WHY YOU ARE NOT STICKING TO PLAN!!! Get back to work!
 
sparty said:
Are naughty weekends and fried starters part of your diet plan??!! Didn't think so!! Why are you drinking wine? Of all the boozy drinks you could choose, wine is one of the worst!! You need to have a serious think about why you want to lose weight and make sure it's higher in your priorities list than chowing down on a calorific Thai and wine!!

Your naughty weekend will probably catch you up next weigh day so this week you will have to work your butt off. The good thing is that you have recognised that you are headed down a slippery slope - now what you need to do is decide if you want results, or excuses. As Rod will tell you.....you can't have both!

This forum is tough on weaknesses but we also share eachothers success and celebrate it. Stick with us and you will soon learn that you prefer the well done's to the tellings off! In here we post WI details, confessions, tough love and prevention/preparation for meals out/weekends away etc to help eachother stay on the straight and narrow! 'The Lounge' (tough love - off subject) is for chit chat so head on over there if you want to talk about jean sizes or crazy neighbours (you will catch my drift if you come on in)

Straighten up now and post us more info on your plan, your stats and WHY YOU ARE NOT STICKING TO PLAN!!! Get back to work!

I'm doing SW and this is week 10. Starting weight 20st 10lbs, current weight (last Monday) 18st 11.5lbs

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins
 
After having 2 perfect weeks i throw it all away!! Ive no excuses i just ate for the sake ov eating coz i wanted it! Feel ill today thou so im payin for it :( ud think id learn that greasy n fatty foods do not do my ibs any gud please kick my arse!!
After splitting my goodies up i ate 2 bags instead ov 1 and had extra toast wen i wasnt suppose to!!
 
I was half asleep
When I wrote that last post hahaha bloody phone!! I had NO SNACKS, I'm off to get weighed on my way to work, my scales are showing a 3 pound loss since Monday and I'm getting my hopes up so need to see exactly what I have or haven't lost. I actually don't feel like I've lost anything but I've been really good this week so hoping I have. I will report back.

Done my shop to prepare for this weekend, plenty of low cal foods in as I'm out for my best mates 30th tomorrow.

Emma what are u doing??? Why didn't you come on and tell us that you were on a binge? I should hope you do feel bad today, write down exactly how you feel right now and stick it on your fridge. I'm disappointed.
 
After having 2 perfect weeks i throw it all away!! Ive no excuses i just ate for the sake ov eating coz i wanted it! Feel ill today thou so im payin for it :( ud think id learn that greasy n fatty foods do not do my ibs any gud please kick my arse!!
After splitting my goodies up i ate 2 bags instead ov 1 and had extra toast wen i wasnt suppose to!!

Emma!!!! What happened?? I cannot believe in the time it took for you to bag up all your treats and boast about how good you were for knowing your syns in each bag and this morning you have fallen off the wagon!

Whats happening to us all? There have been several blips recently (Thai for me, Lou's panic about the scales, Bonnies tantrum, LJ's biscuits and Emmas crisps!!)and we seem to be wavering.

What has happened to make people slip? Be honest - post what happened and why so that we can get our heads back in the game!

My slip was beacuse I was tired from a really late few nights on the trot and I felt sorry for myself. I was jealous of the other's having nice food and to be honest, i didnt want to miss out. Part of me thought that one slip would be ok as I am near-ish to target. But that is NOT ok - and I will NOT be having any unplanned/unprepared meals again any time soon! I am going out for curry next saturday night and I will save up my syns/cals for it and stick to what I plan from the menu!!
Do we need a collective telling off from the boys? Thats what did it for me last time so maybe it is called for - Rod, Smiley? Out with the TL please - I am begining to worry about us bassers! We have new recruits (abstay, liveandlearn, lizz1985, loolahoop) and we should be showing them the TL way!
 
The fatty wagon is obviously doing the rounds and scooping up the complacent, like the Child Snatcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

Get this in your heads - if you got fat in the past, that means you are ADDICTED TO FOOD. That's an addiction as powerful as any drug, and worse, drug dealers aren't allowed to plaster adverts for their product everywhere. I'm pretty sure 'Desperate Housewives Sponsored By Crack Cocaine' would draw a lot of complaints, yet being sponsored by the sugary garbage that is Special K is apparently just fine.

I'll state the simple fact again: all well-structured diet and exercise plans will get you down to a healthy weight if you follow them honestly.

Let's break it down.

"Well structured" - so things that have been proven to work for many many people. Most of them are simplifications of calorie counting, using points systems.

"Plans" - This is the bit that is causing the problems at the moment in this thread. You got complacent, and stopped planning ahead. It's like driving the car - you don't look at the bit of road 10 feet in front of you, you look 100 feet ahead, and keep checking the pavements, and pay attention to the road signs, so that by the time they arrive you've avoided the potholes and the crazy pedestrians or the BMW-driver who's bound to emerge at high speed from that hidden junction. If you don't look ahead and pay attention, then it is inevitable that you'll crash.

"Healthy Weight" - when you get down below BMI 25, and you're exercising well, then those last few pounds will be hard to shift. My advice is to get rid of the scales, and instead get out the tape measure and use 'how I look' and 'how I feel' as your guide, rather than 'how much do I weigh'

"Follow them honestly" - this is a biggy. The best plan in the world won't work if you lie about it. Keep a food diary, or whatever your plan requires, and fill in every last detail. You'll soon find out what's going wrong.

And now I'll add the Smiley Scientific Step for Success - NO SNACKING. I won't go into all the details, but the simple fact is that your body won't start getting rid of it's fat deposits until about 2 hours after eating, and if you eat a snack, you reset that clock. If you really have to have a chocolate bar or a packet of crisps as your 'treat', have it as part of a larger meal, like a mini-dessert with lunch. And the no-snacking rule includes sugary drinks and fruit juices, and also alcohol - drink wine or beer with dinner, but not on its own in the evening.

Final point, on the 'head' side of things. Write yourself a letter, from fat you to future you. Remind yourself of all the things horrible about being fat. Don't hold back - be graphic on the disgusting biological and medical stuff. Include all the emotional misery that being fat brings, from the hurtful comments, to the shame of unloading a pile of empty pizza boxes into the bin. Then read that letter once a week, just before your weigh-in.

OK, TL thread homework - everyone write that letter, including me. Do it before the end of the day. No need to post it on here - if you do it right it would probably get moderated anyway.
 
me AGAIN! need help and straight talking! was my birthday tues, everyone this week seems to want to see me stuff myface with food! ihave had (brought for me not eaten!) 3 birthday cakes! n massive choc fudge ones at that!
2 boxes of choc! wine! takeaways, meals out arrggghhh
i havent been too bad (could have been MUCH BETTER!) ive had 2 slices of bday cake (1 tues, 1 weds - 2 seperate occassions with different people) ive had 2 chocs from the box n let hubby and my daughter eat the rest, i left most of my takeaway, just didnt want it (weds) buuutttt.... hubby poured me a galss of wine last night, had a nice evening and ended up drinking the whole bottle *sigh* i very rarely drink! last time i even touched alcohol was week before i started SW n before that i think it was october! lol
am back on plan today, but im off to see my family for the weekend which involves drinking, more cake and a chinese! i do have a plan, but any tough love words to stick in my head to keep me on my plan!?
 
And now I'll add the Smiley Scientific Step for Success - NO SNACKING. I won't go into all the details, but the simple fact is that your body won't start getting rid of it's fat deposits until about 2 hours after eating, and if you eat a snack, you reset that clock. If you really have to have a chocolate bar or a packet of crisps as your 'treat', have it as part of a larger meal, like a mini-dessert with lunch. And the no-snacking rule includes sugary drinks and fruit juices, and also alcohol - drink wine or beer with dinner, but not on its own in the evening.

Really? why is there always so much conflicting advice?! :'( as i have been told to eat every couple of hours to "keep the fire burning" and that body needs food to burn fat..ahhh i get so confused! :(
so snacking is a no-no!?
 
SmileyMan said:
The fatty wagon is obviously doing the rounds and scooping up the complacent, like the Child Snatcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

Get this in your heads - if you got fat in the past, that means you are ADDICTED TO FOOD. That's an addiction as powerful as any drug, and worse, drug dealers aren't allowed to plaster adverts for their product everywhere. I'm pretty sure 'Desperate Housewives Sponsored By Crack Cocaine' would draw a lot of complaints, yet being sponsored by the sugary garbage that is Special K is apparently just fine.

I'll state the simple fact again: all well-structured diet and exercise plans will get you down to a healthy weight if you follow them honestly.

Let's break it down.

"Well structured" - so things that have been proven to work for many many people. Most of them are simplifications of calorie counting, using points systems.

"Plans" - This is the bit that is causing the problems at the moment in this thread. You got complacent, and stopped planning ahead. It's like driving the car - you don't look at the bit of road 10 feet in front of you, you look 100 feet ahead, and keep checking the pavements, and pay attention to the road signs, so that by the time they arrive you've avoided the potholes and the crazy pedestrians or the BMW-driver who's bound to emerge at high speed from that hidden junction. If you don't look ahead and pay attention, then it is inevitable that you'll crash.

"Healthy Weight" - when you get down below BMI 25, and you're exercising well, then those last few pounds will be hard to shift. My advice is to get rid of the scales, and instead get out the tape measure and use 'how I look' and 'how I feel' as your guide, rather than 'how much do I weigh'

"Follow them honestly" - this is a biggy. The best plan in the world won't work if you lie about it. Keep a food diary, or whatever your plan requires, and fill in every last detail. You'll soon find out what's going wrong.

And now I'll add the Smiley Scientific Step for Success - NO SNACKING. I won't go into all the details, but the simple fact is that your body won't start getting rid of it's fat deposits until about 2 hours after eating, and if you eat a snack, you reset that clock. If you really have to have a chocolate bar or a packet of crisps as your 'treat', have it as part of a larger meal, like a mini-dessert with lunch. And the no-snacking rule includes sugary drinks and fruit juices, and also alcohol - drink wine or beer with dinner, but not on its own in the evening.

Final point, on the 'head' side of things. Write yourself a letter, from fat you to future you. Remind yourself of all the things horrible about being fat. Don't hold back - be graphic on the disgusting biological and medical stuff. Include all the emotional misery that being fat brings, from the hurtful comments, to the shame of unloading a pile of empty pizza boxes into the bin. Then read that letter once a week, just before your weigh-in.

OK, TL thread homework - everyone write that letter, including me. Do it before the end of the day. No need to post it on here - if you do it right it would probably get moderated anyway.

Post of the week nomination rod. Brilliant science boy just brilliant. Helped me
Massively. I'm just walking the 3 miles to work and now I'm bouncing along with
Motivation thanks to you.

I figured out the snack thing 2 months ago, but didn't understand why if I had the same amount of cals bit split between 2 snacks and 3 meals I wouldn't lose as much as if I just had 3 larger meals. This has concreted in why I need to
Cut the snacking. I
Will write my letter tonight I don't mind posting it I think it may help to have other people read it to make me stick to it. I'm on the last leg of my weight loss journey I want this and it's hard but
Being fat is harder. I'm choosing my hard.....keeping going with the weight loss

As for why I had a wobble, its alcohol pure and simple. I love it, I love going out, I love wine and dancing and laughing and I associate good times with drink. I'm not ready to give it up and majority of times I can work it in and still lose but I just lost control on Saturday, hubby annoyed me and I've had a lot on health wise and I guess I use alcohol as a release. Tbh I don't regret it either, I won't do it for a long time now and I'm a big girl, I can decide to get drunk if I want but I just have to accept I can't have drunk and weight loss so I'm back to
Moderation drinking. Tomorrow is the test. Eek.
 
I am just wholly dismayed at all this wobbling, what are you all doing?

Emma's hit the sabotage button again, Bonnie's lost the plot, the list goes on....

I'll tell you what it is. Its thats damn chat thread. you ladies get so cosy and comfy in each others company and you let your guard down. The "this little bit won't matter" mindset slips in.

the regulars know full well what the score is and Sparty is spot on. We all need to lead by example. Smiley is the only one who's dropped this week.

The new people want tough love and those dishing it out aren't able to walk the line? Is this how it's going to be?

I could sting you all individually for sure, but this thread is now too big for me to keep up

So, take Smileys advice on board, which IMO is solid gold. Write the letter, ratchet back to square one, realise that the journey is not won and finish it.

Stop cheating, start planning, stop snacking, start exercising

and above all have some respect for those that are taking the time to help you

meantime I got an appointment with the 15's so make like me and stare down the weekend sisters
 
As for why I had a wobble, its alcohol pure and simple. I love it, I love going out, I love wine and dancing and laughing and I associate good times with drink. I'm not ready to give it up and majority of times I can work it in and still lose but I just lost control on Saturday, hubby annoyed me and I've had a lot on health wise and I guess I use alcohol as a release. Tbh I don't regret it either, I won't do it for a long time now and I'm a big girl, I can decide to get drunk if I want but I just have to accept I can't have drunk and weight loss so I'm back to
Moderation drinking. Tomorrow is the test. Eek.

there you go! my golden rule busted and the consequences right there

Lou knows the score, climb back up on that wagon or it's CANKLES sisters
 
Really? why is there always so much conflicting advice?! :'( as i have been told to eat every couple of hours to "keep the fire burning" and that body needs food to burn fat..ahhh i get so confused! :(
so snacking is a no-no!?
Let me guess, did these people also tell you you had a "slow metabolism" - what a cool 'scientific' reason (e.g. excuse) for being fat.

OK, here's the long explanation of the science behind the No Snacking Rule.

All foods break down into three main components - carbohydrate, fat and protein.

Carbohydrates are absorbed very quickly - 100g of carbohydrate will go from your digestion to your bloodstream in just over half an hour. First this will raise your blood glucose (used by everything in the body for energy), then it will re-fill your glycogen stores, and anything excess will be converted into body fat.

Fats are absorbed slower - it takes about half an hour for digestion to start, then about two hours per 100g after that. Absorbed fat will first raise the fatty acid levels in your blood (used by muscles for energy), and then the excess will be stored in body fat.

Proteins are absorbed slowest of all. It takes over 12 hours to digest 100g of protein. First this raises the levels of amino acids in the blood (used to rebuild body structures) and then the liver starts manufacturing glucose from the amino acids. If this is excess glucose, then guess what - it gets converted to body fat.

When your blood sugar gets used up (the glucose in your blood is only enough to keep you alive for about 40 minutes) it gets replaced from the glycogen stores. When the glycogen stores start getting used up, your fat cells start releasing fatty acids that are coverted to glucose as well. THIS SECOND BIT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO BE HAPPENING.

So the key to losing body fat is to get your blood glucose low as quickly as possible, and keep it there for as long as possible. And this is why snacking causes such a problem - it gives your blood sugar a massive boost just at the time it had reached the levels where the fat burning had really started kicking in. If you eat every two hours, then you'll basically just be emptying and refilling the glucose in your blood, and will never touch the fat stores.

As for 'the body needs food to burn fat' - well, I'm on a Very Low Calorie Diet, where I eat hardly any food at all, and I'm losing 3kgs per week. It's just complete nonsense.
 
Well done Lou! My WI tomorrow morning. Will report in.

And a plea. Can we please stop calling food "naughty"! It gets right on my considerable chest. No food is "naughty". We are all grown ups for goodness sake so if we want to have a biscuit or a cake or a TOPIC (Rodders :)) then go ahead - just plan for it and get it down ya. "Naughty" food - how old are we --- 5!!

Rant over! :mad:
 
Let me guess, did these people also tell you you had a "slow metabolism" - what a cool 'scientific' reason (e.g. excuse) for being fat.

OK, here's the long explanation of the science behind the No Snacking Rule.

All foods break down into three main components - carbohydrate, fat and protein.


Carbohydrates are absorbed very quickly - 100g of carbohydrate will go from your digestion to your bloodstream in just over half an hour. First this will raise your blood glucose (used by everything in the body for energy), then it will re-fill your glycogen stores, and anything excess will be converted into body fat.

Fats are absorbed slower - it takes about half an hour for digestion to start, then about two hours per 100g after that. Absorbed fat will first raise the fatty acid levels in your blood (used by muscles for energy), and then the excess will be stored in body fat.

Proteins are absorbed slowest of all. It takes over 12 hours to digest 100g of protein. First this raises the levels of amino acids in the blood (used to rebuild body structures) and then the liver starts manufacturing glucose from the amino acids. If this is excess glucose, then guess what - it gets converted to body fat.

When your blood sugar gets used up (the glucose in your blood is only enough to keep you alive for about 40 minutes) it gets replaced from the glycogen stores. When the glycogen stores start getting used up, your fat cells start releasing fatty acids that are coverted to glucose as well. THIS SECOND BIT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO BE HAPPENING.

So the key to losing body fat is to get your blood glucose low as quickly as possible, and keep it there for as long as possible. And this is why snacking causes such a problem - it gives your blood sugar a massive boost just at the time it had reached the levels where the fat burning had really started kicking in. If you eat every two hours, then you'll basically just be emptying and refilling the glucose in your blood, and will never touch the fat stores.

As for 'the body needs food to burn fat' - well, I'm on a Very Low Calorie Diet, where I eat hardly any food at all, and I'm losing 3kgs per week. It's just complete nonsense.

okie dokie!! gonna give the no snacking a go! ...doesd it matter what kinda food ur eating then? does that make a difference? im doing SW which is low fat anyway, and i dont eat many carbs in the forn of bread, pasta or potatoes, i get my carbs from veg and a weighed amount of pulses mainly. then i have meat, eggs or fish with it..is this right? or should i change something?
 
Let me guess, did these people also tell you you had a "slow metabolism" - what a cool 'scientific' reason (e.g. excuse) for being fat.

OK, here's the long explanation of the science behind the No Snacking Rule.

All foods break down into three main components - carbohydrate, fat and protein.

Carbohydrates are absorbed very quickly - 100g of carbohydrate will go from your digestion to your bloodstream in just over half an hour. First this will raise your blood glucose (used by everything in the body for energy), then it will re-fill your glycogen stores, and anything excess will be converted into body fat.

Fats are absorbed slower - it takes about half an hour for digestion to start, then about two hours per 100g after that. Absorbed fat will first raise the fatty acid levels in your blood (used by muscles for energy), and then the excess will be stored in body fat.

Proteins are absorbed slowest of all. It takes over 12 hours to digest 100g of protein. First this raises the levels of amino acids in the blood (used to rebuild body structures) and then the liver starts manufacturing glucose from the amino acids. If this is excess glucose, then guess what - it gets converted to body fat.

When your blood sugar gets used up (the glucose in your blood is only enough to keep you alive for about 40 minutes) it gets replaced from the glycogen stores. When the glycogen stores start getting used up, your fat cells start releasing fatty acids that are coverted to glucose as well. THIS SECOND BIT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO BE HAPPENING.

So the key to losing body fat is to get your blood glucose low as quickly as possible, and keep it there for as long as possible. And this is why snacking causes such a problem - it gives your blood sugar a massive boost just at the time it had reached the levels where the fat burning had really started kicking in. If you eat every two hours, then you'll basically just be emptying and refilling the glucose in your blood, and will never touch the fat stores.

As for 'the body needs food to burn fat' - well, I'm on a Very Low Calorie Diet, where I eat hardly any food at all, and I'm losing 3kgs per week. It's just complete nonsense.

Brilliant post again - everyone should read that twice

further reading on the subject can be found on www.marksdailyapple.com and the book the Primal Blueprint makes it all pretty clear

my take is that carb spikes are no good to general weight loss and myself, after losing just over 4st can say that without a doubt, I do believe in the principles of the primal/paleo diet

I don't really follow it properly, but the basic principles are kind of how I do my thing. I love spuds/rice and pasta/bread etc, but those glycogen boosts are definitely not good and will inhibit sensible, maintainable long term weight loss

What I do is this:

Breakfast: 5 slices of lean ham, 3 scrambled eggs with a little milk and butter, punnet of berries

Snack - small serving of nuts and raisins

Lunch - half a chicken and two salad bags with a drizzle of extra virgin olive oil with chilli or garlic infusion

Snack - a peach or something like that

Dinner - poached fish (size big as I can catch) steamed or roast veg. 1 small sweet potato among it. A small portion in the evening. I load up at lunch when I'm most active.

I have no idea of the calorific intake, I count nothing and I weigh nothing. I am a big lad at 6-1 and as long as I'm satisfied (not full, bloated or stuffed) I will and DO WALK AWAY.

some days I skip a meal - this is a principle called intermittent fasting and is useful if you have wacky hours or mad hobbies...I am rarely hungry nowadays apart from in the morning, which is the opposite to how I was pre-lifestyle change

I deliberately have not gone on a "plan" because I will fail - I know what I had to do, but not disciplined enough to weigh and count - I am not that sort of person. I applaud anyone that is.

you have to do what works for you.

In among all this are a couple of Smileys principles

one is low carb - not allowing my glycogen to spike

limited snacking and potentially infrequent meals - I completey echo Smileys contention that you do not need food to burn fat.

I would futher add that excessive carbs make this a doubly difficult task

this is what I do.

this will not work for everyone and I am no expert.

But I do have willpower and honesty and those two principles above all, determine my success and the success of this thread. I do believe that everyone is being honest.

the willpower is like patience, it comes and goes. Bring it in and hang onto it like a liferaft.

One day, in the not too distant future, when you have 5lbs to go, it may be all you have
 
Last edited:
okie dokie!! gonna give the no snacking a go! ...doesd it matter what kinda food ur eating then? does that make a difference? im doing SW which is low fat anyway, and i dont eat many carbs in the forn of bread, pasta or potatoes, i get my carbs from veg and a weighed amount of pulses mainly. then i have meat, eggs or fish with it..is this right? or should i change something?
Avoid processed food if you can, because it's full of added sugars which mess with the body's ability to tell whether it's hungry or not. Other than that, any balanced food made should be OK.

Try to eat less than 100g of carbs in each meal - that way you will have absorbed them all before the protein and fat start being absorbed, so your blood gets a slow steady stream of sugar rather than a big rush if the carbs and fat/protein overlap.

I don't know how SW works, but I do know that on WW the number of 'Points' you are allowed drops as you lose weight, so if there's a similar system, make sure you are using the right amount of 'Syns' (?) for your weight.

With a BMI of 25.5, there's no way you'll get down to 22.6 by October unless you start building in a decent amount of exercise into your plan. If you can walk 4 miles in an hour, you'll burn off 600 calories - do that every day and that's over 4000 extra calories gone every week. Just swap "EastEnders and Corrie" for "Slim and Sexy" :)
 
Back
Top