Trying a fresh!

[thumbelloulou]

God, dunno if its cos of period bloat but I'm über down on my weight this week.. Why, after getting to 10st am I still so unhappy? I'm aiming for few more off but I don't understand my perception of myself!

Having odd moments over the last few weeks. So many things daily remind me of my mum, but only occasionally they spark an emotion, but I feel like its getting more frequent.. I guess anything and any way you grieve is normal.. And I guess these times will come and go x

So yesterday it was Dolly Parton on the radio singing Joleen.. Which reminded me of the fact we chose the Dolly version of I will always love you for her funeral, over the Whitney version that mums wishes had suggested..

Today what set me off was sending a mini rant to my best friend about something and realising Ive not ranted to her since mums gone.. Very random, but it set me off. Getting t out of my system

 

[Texty_F]

Its always the little things that set us off hun - ive lost count of the amount of times my OH has had to wake me from my sleep as im actually sobbing in my sleep and its always my parents im dreaming about. Its little songs on the radio, the smell of flowers

(( Big hugs hun)) xx

 

[thumbelloulou]

Thanks love, tis good to know its normal xx

 

[Texty_F]

Its very normal hun - its been 8 yrs for mam, 6 for dad and 20 for my sis - but I still miss them every day xx

 

[thumbelloulou]

Bless you, does make you appreciate everything and everyone still around you xx Your sis must have been young lovely, so sad x
15 mths since mum, she was terminal for 6 years, and so stressful during that time. Was a relief she was no longer suffering but so sad, she was only 60. Just glad she got to meet my two beautiful babes and have time with them. They remember her too and we often talk about her so I hope they never forget x

 

[Texty_F]

She was 39 chick and left 4 children she was terminal as were both my parents. I hate the C word I really do. Its lovely to hear your mum got to meet the 2 little ones. Its good to have memories love - cherish them xx

 

[thumbelloulou]

Every day Xx

 

[thumbelloulou]

Woken again feeling exhausted/hungover (no booze) and aching all over!
Oweeee
Painkillers done, and hopefully by the time I am back from the school run I should be feeling more mobile.

Fasting today... But still feeling mega bloated. Was under 1400 cal yesterday, so sticking to suggested and also following SW on feast days. Wonder if my coil is cause of the bloat.. Shall make sure I drink plenty today too. Would really love to see under 10 st on the scales this week.. But still feeling a bit like it might not happen.

Breakfast - cup of tea, 30g porridge with water
Lunch - beetroot, quorn with onion and mushroom
Dinner - went wrong when I baked banana cake

Drinks - sparkling water, black coffee

 

[thumbelloulou]

Oh pooh, my fast day has all gone wrong.. I baked banana cake for the kids, thinking I could be strong, and I clearly wasn't
Then it went into a downhill spiral thinking I would not be able to pull the week back.. Then I realised I can still just fast tomorrow!
Today has not been awful, just the cake, but over 500 cal I'm sure...
I've shoved the cake in the freezer, so I can't be tempted, and I will have a 100%fast tomorrow..
Feelîng less demotivated having made the realisation
Bring on tomorrow x

 

[thumbelloulou]

Nice evening

 

[Texty_F]

Aww I love an open fire I miss mine.

I hope you feel better tomorrow hun. Have you had the coil in very long?

 

[Loveisaverb]

Hi, listen lovely, stick with it, you inspired me to try the 5:2 sw combo and at wi tonight I've lost 4lbs! I can't believe it and its thanks to you!
I'm sorry to read you're down but chins up, we can do this. remembering all the happy times with your mum and family, although tinged with sadness, were good times, I know it's hard to focus on that, but we have to try
Have a good week.... virtual hugs xxx



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[thumbelloulou]

Aww I love an open fire I miss mine.

I hope you feel better tomorrow hun. Have you had the coil in very long?

Thanks love, tis a new day I will be fine x
Coil been in three months - seems longer, but maybe 4 cycles..

 

[thumbelloulou]

Hi, listen lovely, stick with it, you inspired me to try the 5:2 sw combo and at wi tonight I've lost 4lbs! I can't believe it and its thanks to you!
I'm sorry to read you're down but chins up, we can do this. remembering all the happy times with your mum and family, although tinged with sadness, were good times, I know it's hard to focus on that, but we have to try
Have a good week.... virtual hugs xxx



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Wow! Amazing loss! So glad it's working, and lovely to know I inspired you well done YOU
Thanks for the hugsxx I will be fine, just realised another thing adding to my low is oh away for a couple of weeks. I'm used to it regularly, but have had him home over the summer... I guess it's all just bogged me down this week!
New day tomorrow
Have a great week too! Xxx

 

[thumbelloulou]

And again, a hangover without the alcohol. Body in agony.. Meds taken so hopefully will ease shortly!

Fasting again today! Properly without banana cake lol!
Really would just like a mini budge below 140lb tomorrow.. 139.5 would be just fine!

 

[thumbelloulou]

On a positive note I'm feeling much less bloated today!! Recon it must be cycle related!

 

[thumbelloulou]

Dinner was amazing and all for 160cals!


'Fried' 'rice' .. Or cauliflower disguised as rice! Really yum and filling too

Breakfast - porridge with water
Lunch - roast veg - courgette, onion, mushroom, garlic and cherry tomatoes
Dinner - 'fried rice' with courgette, onion, chill, soy
Drinks - tea, black coffee

 

[thumbelloulou]

Well, I STS this week.. Hoping its still cycle bloat and that it'll come off next week.. Hey ho.. Feeling more positive anyway which is a start

 

[thumbelloulou]

Omg! I chased my college application earlier this week and it turned out it had not been passed to the relevant dept which is why I hadn't heard... So I went in for a chat and to show my portfolio this morning and they have agreed by my potential and determination to accept me on the course!!!!! Wooooah!
So I start on Monday! I can't get the smile off my face!

 

[Loveisaverb]

Well done for getting into college, great news What are you studying?
Not to worry about STS you'll lose this week, I'm sure. Have a good weekend xxx


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