CrazyDogLady
Member
Great diary @Alecto_on_LCD - sounds like you're finding your stride with exante now. Keep up the good work! 
Weight loss again
- Thread starter Alecto_on_LCD
- Start date
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Thank you all for all your kindness and encouragement. It means so much!
I'm looking forward to catching up with everyone's diaries when I get in this evening as today is hectic.
Quick note Day 8 - 74.4kg (11.72st), lost 3.2kg (7.05pounds).
Happy and successful week to everyone.
I'm looking forward to catching up with everyone's diaries when I get in this evening as today is hectic.
Quick note Day 8 - 74.4kg (11.72st), lost 3.2kg (7.05pounds).
Happy and successful week to everyone.
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Right...the good and the bad. Ill start with the good. Had the while chocolate and raspberry bar for bfast. Amazing! Honest - ive had protein bars before for exercise purposes and was expecting it to be like biting into an actual shoe. It was moist on the inside, crunchy on the outside with little chocolate pellets. Really nice! Then the vanilla shake for lunch (v impressed also) and the red bean chilli. 3.7l of water and 10k steps.
The bad stuff....? Well let's just say I'm a bit dumb...not felt hungry all day. Physically that's all gone. Psychologically though I've been using alcohol and food as a comforting crutch. I've thought of all sort of bad foods today. Even looked im the pantry for any leftover gin. There was none as I prepared for such a thing happening. Then i opened the fridge (I hadn't in 1 week!) to look for some cat food (for the cats, btw) and i saw a slice of cheese and hummus. Litterally I took a 1cm corner of that slice, dipped it in the hummus and ate it. It happened very quickly:/
I felt bad immediately so I ran away from the kitchen. I doubt 1cm of cheese will kick me out of ketosis....(well, hopefully). But man, that was dumb! Not again!
Immediately made myself busy around the house, made some tea and my dinner and now I'm staying as far away from the kitchen as I can.
Oh I hope I didn't ruin things! I'm just disappointed with myself because I didn't even feel hungry, just...craving..
The bad stuff....? Well let's just say I'm a bit dumb...not felt hungry all day. Physically that's all gone. Psychologically though I've been using alcohol and food as a comforting crutch. I've thought of all sort of bad foods today. Even looked im the pantry for any leftover gin. There was none as I prepared for such a thing happening. Then i opened the fridge (I hadn't in 1 week!) to look for some cat food (for the cats, btw) and i saw a slice of cheese and hummus. Litterally I took a 1cm corner of that slice, dipped it in the hummus and ate it. It happened very quickly:/
I felt bad immediately so I ran away from the kitchen. I doubt 1cm of cheese will kick me out of ketosis....(well, hopefully). But man, that was dumb! Not again!
Immediately made myself busy around the house, made some tea and my dinner and now I'm staying as far away from the kitchen as I can.
Oh I hope I didn't ruin things! I'm just disappointed with myself because I didn't even feel hungry, just...craving..
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Ps. I did feed the cats and no harm or hunger happened to them in this whole process
#GymBunny
#gymrat
Wow, you’re giving yourself such a beating - ease up! It would have been best if you’d not done it, it’s a lesson in self-control and it will be the start of helping you understand your triggers. What it wasn’t was the end of the world! You won’t have done any damage and you’re still on track for a great loss this week.
Keep up the good work and stay away from the alcohol and the kitchen where possible. Give it a week or so and you’ll be sitting next to people while they devour your usual favourites and you won’t even blink an eyelid.
Enjoy the rest of your evening and wake up tomorrow feeling great - you’ve kicked another day into touch
Keep up the good work and stay away from the alcohol and the kitchen where possible. Give it a week or so and you’ll be sitting next to people while they devour your usual favourites and you won’t even blink an eyelid.
Enjoy the rest of your evening and wake up tomorrow feeling great - you’ve kicked another day into touch
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Good morning Day 9. Also Day 6 without alcohol has started. Despite the intense cravings last evening I made it through. Triggers? Tiredness, having been in the office for too long, having had a rather stressful day.
Thank you, @#GymBunny. I'm well known for the talent of beating myself up - highly unproductive and I become my own enemy by adding with that to the stress of any day. Point taken. I'll try focusing on the good I'm doing.
I'm at 74.3kg today, just 100gr lower. I'll continue weighing myself every day for a while as it helps me personally atm. Hope we all have good sunny days today.
Thank you, @#GymBunny. I'm well known for the talent of beating myself up - highly unproductive and I become my own enemy by adding with that to the stress of any day. Point taken. I'll try focusing on the good I'm doing.
I'm at 74.3kg today, just 100gr lower. I'll continue weighing myself every day for a while as it helps me personally atm. Hope we all have good sunny days today.
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May45
Full Member
Morning @Alecto_on_LCD ... firstly 'WOW' what a journey... I just read your whole diary... I am so impressed with your courage to keep going and your determination... I too struggle with the Friday night drinks... but as much as I love a good G&T I've decided to go booze free till October (next big event) and am TS till then as well... only started this week, am on day 2 today (wish me luck?) although I've done this before a few years ago and had great results...I know it's a tough journey.. Looking forward to reading more of your journey... have a great day
castingnasturtiums
Full Member
Awww, Alecto. I honestly think you've made it extra hard for yourself because you have essentially two sets of cravings/triggers to manage: food and alcohol. I used to have a severe caffeine via diet coke addiction but I stopped drinking caffeine a week before I started the diet so I didn't have food withdrawal and caffeine withdrawal to manage at the same time. At the start of the diet it does actually take mental energy to stay on plan, manage your cravings, and you're having to share that mental energy. So I guess the first thing to accept is that you're doing a really tough thing - and, as Bunny says above, don't beat yourself.
Obviously it's not great to break plan. And I think the problem with breaking plan is that it messes with your mind over and above whatever impact it has on your body. It gets in the way of you working *with* the plan and instead turns the plan into this villain you're trying to cheat or get one over on. I had a few false starts because of slipping into exactly that mindset - like I'd catch myself cheating and feeling smug if it didn't show on the scales at the end of the week. But ultimately I was only hurting myself: the plan is an abstract. It doesn't care whether I cheat or not. But finally it clicked into place - I'm doing this for me, so I deserve to do it right.
More practically, again just echoing Bunny a bit, you are actually getting an opportunity to learn about your triggers and your patterns. I think it's very clear from what you've said (and, believe me, I've been here) that food/drink became your refuge and I understand why your brain would be reeling now you've taken that refuge away. So ... get a new refuge. There must be something else that makes you feel good or comforted. It doesn't have to be super dramatic - I mean, is there a book you're desperate to read, a show you really want to watch, is there a craft you enjoy or whatever? Basically what I'm saying is, when I get the food-urge, I do the other thing instead. Which means I've watched a lot of Love Island and done a lot of painting but at least I haven't eaten
Obviously it's not great to break plan. And I think the problem with breaking plan is that it messes with your mind over and above whatever impact it has on your body. It gets in the way of you working *with* the plan and instead turns the plan into this villain you're trying to cheat or get one over on. I had a few false starts because of slipping into exactly that mindset - like I'd catch myself cheating and feeling smug if it didn't show on the scales at the end of the week. But ultimately I was only hurting myself: the plan is an abstract. It doesn't care whether I cheat or not. But finally it clicked into place - I'm doing this for me, so I deserve to do it right.
More practically, again just echoing Bunny a bit, you are actually getting an opportunity to learn about your triggers and your patterns. I think it's very clear from what you've said (and, believe me, I've been here) that food/drink became your refuge and I understand why your brain would be reeling now you've taken that refuge away. So ... get a new refuge. There must be something else that makes you feel good or comforted. It doesn't have to be super dramatic - I mean, is there a book you're desperate to read, a show you really want to watch, is there a craft you enjoy or whatever? Basically what I'm saying is, when I get the food-urge, I do the other thing instead. Which means I've watched a lot of Love Island and done a lot of painting but at least I haven't eaten
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Morning @Alecto_on_LCD ... firstly 'WOW' what a journey... I just read your whole diary... I am so impressed with your courage to keep going and your determination... I too struggle with the Friday night drinks... but as much as I love a good G&T I've decided to go booze free till October (next big event) and am TS till then as well... only started this week, am on day 2 today (wish me luck?) although I've done this before a few years ago and had great results...I know it's a tough journey.. Looking forward to reading more of your journey... have a great day
Thank you so much! I had gotten to the point of having a drink every day. I started to think I was addicted because as much as in the morning I would tell myself 'not today', by the end of the work day i'd think 'screw it, others are doing it too, aren't they?'. that's a bad mental place to be in - indeed society normalizes the consumption of alcohol and food and you are always told it's fine. but on the long term, it is not for any part of our body. I was scared I wouldn't be able to come off this crazy train of consumption, so scared that I asked for an NHS referral to alcohol counselling. Last week was difficult (and I still get cravings as per last evening) because, as Castings was saying my mental energy went into controlling 2 things at once. But as (I thought) alcohol and food cravings are routed in the same place in the brain and psychologically speaking they are the same crutch, for me, getting them both out of the way is the only way out. After I had my last 2 pints (that I didn't even enjoy tbh) last Wednesday I read a lot about VLCD and alcohol. And apparently it is rather dangerous, apart from the other negative points the others have stated here on this thread.
I have now reached day 6 and I've had no physical withdrawal symptoms or anything - which shows that there was no physical dependency, it was just a behavioural one - simply said, automatic bad habit. Even more so I would just 'give up the control' over the craving and not fight it on any day because of thinking 'well, im going to fail anyway, so i might as well do it'. This diet pushed me over that edge of fear of failure with this 1 aspect of my life. And I am ready to continue.
I have planned in 1 alcohol day on the 11th August when it's my partner's birthday and we are having a big BBQ. That is also going to be one of the 2 break days I am taking within this journey (by then I hope to have reached my first milestone in terms of loss). But the meal is already mostly planned I am staying away from any carbs and will have....lettuce sandwiches (that is lean meat between 2 lettuce leaves!); drink-wise it's only going to be gin. But that is the plan now - by the time that day comes I might not want that at all and I will just want to stick to the exante all day. I'm leaving that for a decision later to that moment. On the other break day I will not have alcohol, but I will be eating real food instead of exante within the 600calorie allowance.
Day 2 and 3 can be tough. Hang in there, much luck to you, and I promise it's going to get better in a couple of days. You only need to wait until Sunday, at maximum! Then it's going to be smooth sailing (mostly). Write on here, read people's inspiring diaries and keep on going until Sunday. Have early nights and drink tons of water. Things that did help me last week were: I did not enter any supermarkets until Saturday; I did not eat with my partner until Sunday; I did not put any pressure on myself at work (which is very very unnatural for me) because of the mental fogginess. Blips that might happen, as Casting also says (I keep quoting you a lot!) is to become aware of your own processes.
You can do it, I know you can! Let's do this!
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Thank you all! You are absolutely right. I also re-read Fathom's diary as it's also very inspiring in this sense. Conclusion? I will not kid or cheat myself. This plan is not an enemy, it's my becoming healthy and staying there. I will not swim against it, no matter what!
I realised that if I stick to it and have a loss of 1kg per week (which is pretty much the minimum people get), I will be at goal weight on 9th December. So here I go carrying on and counting down the days.
I realised that if I stick to it and have a loss of 1kg per week (which is pretty much the minimum people get), I will be at goal weight on 9th December. So here I go carrying on and counting down the days.
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Day 9 ending. Porridge, noodles, and mushroom soup. The soups seem all to be quite same-y. Eh. I just had dinner and I feel like I've just eaten a whole pig. Cool stuff!
4Litres of water and 14k steps today.
On another note i feel a bit lonely - not had dinner with my partner in ages and it feels like we never see each other any more as by the time he is at home and has dinner im going to bed. All the activities with my friends also seem to only involve food and drinks. Ill have a think about restructuring my relationships a bit not to be revolving around these 2 things. Easier said than done. I'll ponder tho.
Sunday is the planned "break" day 1 in this journey. I cannot avoid it - my partner's grandma is turning 90, the whole family is there and it's been planned ages ago. If it were only the parents or something or a couple of people I wouldn't mind just saying stuff straight. With so many people and such an important event - id be seen as a weirdo (while still trying to make a good impression) and would need to give a lecture on why im doing what im doing (or so I think). Anyhoo she wants to go to a carvery as that's her favourite place. Been browsing menues of various chains, some even have nutritional info (! Oh, i do hope they choose a chain - they are quite disorganised like that unfortunately). I saw they have an immense salad only with greens and can have plain chicken on it. Calorie wise ill be around 500 so i think thatll be my only meal of the day. Is it rude to tell people to take stuff off salads in these places (ie dont want dressing and sultanas for instance)? Im a bit meh about this whole thing but ill survive and wont kick me out of ketosis. It'll be nice to celebrate his grandma though. Ill be staying away from lemons as well!
Looking forward to tomorrow
4Litres of water and 14k steps today.
On another note i feel a bit lonely - not had dinner with my partner in ages and it feels like we never see each other any more as by the time he is at home and has dinner im going to bed. All the activities with my friends also seem to only involve food and drinks. Ill have a think about restructuring my relationships a bit not to be revolving around these 2 things. Easier said than done. I'll ponder tho.
Sunday is the planned "break" day 1 in this journey. I cannot avoid it - my partner's grandma is turning 90, the whole family is there and it's been planned ages ago. If it were only the parents or something or a couple of people I wouldn't mind just saying stuff straight. With so many people and such an important event - id be seen as a weirdo (while still trying to make a good impression) and would need to give a lecture on why im doing what im doing (or so I think). Anyhoo she wants to go to a carvery as that's her favourite place. Been browsing menues of various chains, some even have nutritional info (! Oh, i do hope they choose a chain - they are quite disorganised like that unfortunately). I saw they have an immense salad only with greens and can have plain chicken on it. Calorie wise ill be around 500 so i think thatll be my only meal of the day. Is it rude to tell people to take stuff off salads in these places (ie dont want dressing and sultanas for instance)? Im a bit meh about this whole thing but ill survive and wont kick me out of ketosis. It'll be nice to celebrate his grandma though. Ill be staying away from lemons as well!
Looking forward to tomorrow
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May45
Full Member
Thank you so much! I had gotten to the point of having a drink every day. I started to think I was addicted because as much as in the morning I would tell myself 'not today', by the end of the work day i'd think 'screw it, others are doing it too, aren't they?'. that's a bad mental place to be in - indeed society normalizes the consumption of alcohol and food and you are always told it's fine. but on the long term, it is not for any part of our body. I was scared I wouldn't be able to come off this crazy train of consumption, so scared that I asked for an NHS referral to alcohol counselling. Last week was difficult (and I still get cravings as per last evening) because, as Castings was saying my mental energy went into controlling 2 things at once. But as (I thought) alcohol and food cravings are routed in the same place in the brain and psychologically speaking they are the same crutch, for me, getting them both out of the way is the only way out. After I had my last 2 pints (that I didn't even enjoy tbh) last Wednesday I read a lot about VLCD and alcohol. And apparently it is rather dangerous, apart from the other negative points the others have stated here on this thread.
I have now reached day 6 and I've had no physical withdrawal symptoms or anything - which shows that there was no physical dependency, it was just a behavioural one - simply said, automatic bad habit. Even more so I would just 'give up the control' over the craving and not fight it on any day because of thinking 'well, im going to fail anyway, so i might as well do it'. This diet pushed me over that edge of fear of failure with this 1 aspect of my life. And I am ready to continue.
I have planned in 1 alcohol day on the 11th August when it's my partner's birthday and we are having a big BBQ. That is also going to be one of the 2 break days I am taking within this journey (by then I hope to have reached my first milestone in terms of loss). But the meal is already mostly planned I am staying away from any carbs and will have....lettuce sandwiches (that is lean meat between 2 lettuce leaves!); drink-wise it's only going to be gin. But that is the plan now - by the time that day comes I might not want that at all and I will just want to stick to the exante all day. I'm leaving that for a decision later to that moment. On the other break day I will not have alcohol, but I will be eating real food instead of exante within the 600calorie allowance.
Day 2 and 3 can be tough. Hang in there, much luck to you, and I promise it's going to get better in a couple of days. You only need to wait until Sunday, at maximum! Then it's going to be smooth sailing (mostly). Write on here, read people's inspiring diaries and keep on going until Sunday. Have early nights and drink tons of water. Things that did help me last week were: I did not enter any supermarkets until Saturday; I did not eat with my partner until Sunday; I did not put any pressure on myself at work (which is very very unnatural for me) because of the mental fogginess. Blips that might happen, as Casting also says (I keep quoting you a lot!) is to become aware of your own processes.
You can do it, I know you can! Let's do this!
Thanks @Alecto_on_LCD ... I’m fired up and ready to face Day3 - Onwards ! Have a great day yourself eh?
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Day 10. I'm on such an emotional high it's unbelievable! 73.8kg today also. Had a peanut chocolate bar for bfast. Went through the caffeteria of our building to get coffee and none of the cooked bfast items on display felt appealing. Ha! I do sort of miss meat, eggs and spinach weirdly. But those are good things to miss. It's not a craving though, so very much different - almost like if it's a rainy day you miss the sun, but it's all good and fine, you don't get on a plane to Spain immediately just because of that.
Happy Wednesday everyone and keep up the good work!
Happy Wednesday everyone and keep up the good work!
#GymBunny
#gymrat
It’s starting to work in your favour now - always great news and such a good feeling when it happens to you personally. At the beginning it’s hard to believe that such a state is even possible but it is and it happens to all of us. Sadly some give up too soon.
Can’t wait to see you reaping the benefits! Happy hump day
Can’t wait to see you reaping the benefits! Happy hump day
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Day 11. 73.7. Only 100grams but slow and steady wins the race. Yesterday was uneventful mostly. 13k steps, 3.75 litres of water, and the normal 3 meals. Had to rush to the loo more than before and...well if i only eat liquid, im not expecting anything different. Today i went the opposite side of the spectrum. My body is confused i reckon.
Got some ketostixs. The scientist in me wants to see how this happens. They're awesome, and only a fiver in boots! So neat! Im mid-way on them, around a 4. Nice reddish colour. I will need to see how it changes in time and ill to a before-and-after the meal on sunday. I will need another control so ill get my partner to do one too! Unfortunate i cannot keep them to compare after the 15seconds. I might take pictures for me to compare in time. Fascinating
(geek
). Btw thats also the only reason why im weighing each day. I love to see the oscillations!
Got some ketostixs. The scientist in me wants to see how this happens. They're awesome, and only a fiver in boots! So neat! Im mid-way on them, around a 4. Nice reddish colour. I will need to see how it changes in time and ill to a before-and-after the meal on sunday. I will need another control so ill get my partner to do one too! Unfortunate i cannot keep them to compare after the 15seconds. I might take pictures for me to compare in time. Fascinating
(geek). Btw thats also the only reason why im weighing each day. I love to see the oscillations!
Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Found this super useful. Will leave it here for quick reference for myself.
Today I was in the 1.5mg/dL (small range). I believe that is considered safe, optimal zone.
I might, once I start hitting cardio more often see if I get the post-exertion levels. Experiments, experiments! Pity it's just a case study lol
Today I was in the 1.5mg/dL (small range). I believe that is considered safe, optimal zone.
I might, once I start hitting cardio more often see if I get the post-exertion levels. Experiments, experiments! Pity it's just a case study lol
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Alecto_on_LCD
Silver Member
Bit of a worry that I want to log here. Around weekend time within the 1st week i got a bruise on my left lower arm. Not thought much of it as i usually do get bruises easily, sometimes even without hurting myself - maybe i bumped into something and forgot.
2 days ago i got another one on my left knee.
Now my left lower arm feels kinda stiff and under pressure where my initial bruise used to be.
Im keeping an eye on this one. Not sure if i should worry or not, if related to diet plus/minus bad smoking habit and coffee or some combination.
2 days ago i got another one on my left knee.
Now my left lower arm feels kinda stiff and under pressure where my initial bruise used to be.
Im keeping an eye on this one. Not sure if i should worry or not, if related to diet plus/minus bad smoking habit and coffee or some combination.
#GymBunny
#gymrat
Keep an eye on the bruises and maybe see your GP? Hope you’re okay!
The ketostix are very much only a tool to identify ketones. I was an avid Atkins dieter for a while and was always told that you’re either in ketosis or you’re not. Like you’re either pregnant or you’re not. The colour doesn’t really indicate anything more than how hydrated/dehydrated you are. They can be nice to give reassurance but the only real indicator you need is the lack of hunger and other physical signs of ketosis. If they help then definitely keep using them but don’t worry too much about them
The ketostix are very much only a tool to identify ketones. I was an avid Atkins dieter for a while and was always told that you’re either in ketosis or you’re not. Like you’re either pregnant or you’re not. The colour doesn’t really indicate anything more than how hydrated/dehydrated you are. They can be nice to give reassurance but the only real indicator you need is the lack of hunger and other physical signs of ketosis. If they help then definitely keep using them but don’t worry too much about them
